T-shirt sayings

[willywanker]

Of course there is the whole line of Doc Johnson and Co-ed nakeds shirts.

Co-ed naked bowlers- Keep your balls on the lane and your mind in the gutter

Co-ed naked banker- Severe penalty for early withdrawl

Doc Johnson Firefighters- Find 'em hot and leave'em wet.

 

[Adoratrice]

Co-ed Naked cops....Against the wall & spread 'em.

Your just jealous cause the voices are talking to me.

I want you.......to go away.

Your boyfriend kisses better than mine.

Girl with issues.

Boys are great....every girl should own one.

Yes I do...but not with you.

 

[Gryphon]

I love t-shirts like these, I have about thirty of 'em.

"Do me a favor....DIE"

"I don't tan, I combust" (made that myself, damn Irish skin)

"Don't play leapfrog with unicorns"

"The man wearing this shirt is a doctor, now lie back and do whatever the nice doctor tells you"

"Reality is for those who lack imagination"

"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings"

"I love AA meetings, that's where all the drunk sluts are"

"Sacrificial Virgin"

"Atheism : a non-prophet organization"

"Recreational Gynecologist"

 

[Derya]

I have varied tastes to say the least::

"I am it and everybody wants to be me"

Farfugnookie (with cartoon depictions of 2 VW bugs with faces and tongues hanging out "doing it" in all different positions all over the shirt)

Christian T-shirts

"His Pain. Your Gain." (with a large crown of thorns on it)

"Gone to see Dad we're preparing a place for you. Be back to get you soon" (a picture of the cross with a note nailed to it that displays the quote)

http://megsplace.com/dolls/hatnature.gif

 

[Kuddles]

My favorite...

I saw a girl in the mall wearing a shirt that said:

I've had a lot of Dicks in my life but very few Richards...

 

[DarlingBri]

Mine are very similar to Sweet Cherry's...

GOD... is a black lesbian woman in a wheelchair, and boy is she PISSED.

I have PMS and a handgun. Any questions?

Also a geeky one for a bandwith peering consortium:

PEER HERE

...over the breasts with the logo on the back. Very popular at conventions and exhibitions

 

[BrainyBeauty]

From an old joke

ACTUAL T-SHIRT SLOGANS
1. "Frankly, Scallop, I Don't Give a Clam" (seen on Cape Cod)
2. "That's It! I'm Calling Grandma!" (seen on an 8 year old)
3. "Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I
Grew Up"
4. "Procrastinate Now"
5. "Rehab Is for Quitters"
6. "My Dog Can Lick Anyone"
7. "I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts - Do You Want Fries With That?"
8. "Party - My Crib - Two A.M." (on a baby-size shirt)
9. "Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been Doing Since15 "
10. "ALL MEN ARE IDIOTS, AND I MARRIED THEIR KING"
11. "West Virginia: One Million People, and 15 last names"
12. "FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION. It comes bundled with the software"
13. "I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN AND I'VE GOT A GUN"
14. "A hangover is the wrath of grapes"
15. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance"
16. "STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!"
17. "DISCOURAGE INBREEDING - Ban Country Music"
18. "MOOSEHEAD: A great beer and a new experience for a moose"
19. "They call it "PMS" because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken"
20. "He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead"
21. "Time's fun when you're having flies.......Kermit the Frog"
22. "POLICE STATION TOILET STOLEN .... Cops have nothing to go on."
23. "FOR SALE: Iraqi rifle. Never fired. Dropped once."
24. "HECK IS WHERE PEOPLE GO WHO DON'T BELIEVE IN
GOSH"
25. "A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, but it uses up a thousand times the memory."
26. "The Meek shall inherit the earth....afterb we're through with it."
27. "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."
28. "HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig."
29. "WELCOME TO KENTUCKY - Set your watch back 20 years."
30. "The trouble with life is there's no background music."
31. "IF THERE IS NO GOD, WHO POPS UP THE NEXT KLEENEX?"
32. "Suicidal Twin Kills Sister By Mistake!"
33. "The original point-and-click interface was a Smith & Wesson."
34. "MY WILD OATS HAVE TURNED TO SHREDDED WHEAT"
35. "Computer programmers don't byte, they nybble a bit."
36. "Computer programmers know how to use their hardware."
37. "MOP AND GLOW - Floor wax used by Three-Mile-Island cleanup team."
38. "NyQuil-The stuffy, sneezy, why-the-hell-is-the-room-spinning
medicine."
39. "Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."
40. A shirt with a Harley Davidson logo on the front. The back said,
"IF YOU CAN READ THIS, THE BITCH FELL OFF!"
41. "My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God, and I didn't."

 

[coralrose]

From Jamaica, mon...

"I went to Jamaica on my honeymoon and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

Hmm... I should have predicted how my marriage would turn out.

 

[Graymouse]

I saw some athletic girl wearing this one one day--"If soccer were easy, it would be your mom."

Then, because I attend an agricultural college, I saw some girl wearing a shirt with a very pleased, post-orgasmic-looking Holstein on it that said, "I got milked today. It felt good."

My brother has one of those old gas station tee shirts that says "Best Lube Job in Town!"

A guy at the coffeshop I used to go to had a tee shirt with a Twinkie on it that said, "I'm cream-filled!"

I have one that says "Some people are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them."

Someone else I know has one that says, "The world is my ashtray."

My favorite tee shirt is yellow and says simply, "Go Cats!" I like to wear it when I'm cleaning litter boxes at the humane society.

 

[doctor_insanus]

From Jamaica, mon...

"I went to Jamaica on my honeymoon and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

Hmm... I should have predicted how my marriage would turn out.

Hope things are looking up in those "other" areas we've discussed in your thread!

My slogan: "I have the heart of a small child... I keep it in a jar on my desk!"

By Robert Bloch, I believe. One of my all-time favorites!

 

[Comshaw]

A couple of my favorite t-shirts:

"Will work for sex"

"Official Hottub Life Guard"

The HD eagle on a shirt with this printed in the middle;
"If they had more engineers and fewer lawyers they might make a better product"




The wife has two she loves;

"I will not make motorcycle noises in class,
I will not make motorcycle noises in class,"

and
"I have ESP and PMS,
I'm a bitch that knows everything!"

Comshaw

 

[Isolde]

Nevermind..already been posted

[Edited by Isolde on 03-30-2001 at 11:37 AM]

 

[SpectreT]

T-shirts

'50's style cartoon office, two guys in suits: "Jesus is coming-look busy!"

Fruit of the looms logo, but on closer inspection, reads, "Freak in the Room"

Snapple logo that reads "Crapple"

 

[Curious Guy]

LAGNAF