The Fleshlight

[TheEarl]

well...YUH!

Though not everyone is a buff, young rugby player.

I'm still very single Rhino.

The Earl

 

[McKenna]

<snip>I do find that sort of amusing though. Most porn is geared to males. Most escort services geared to them. Most sexual publications are geared to them. it seems sex toys are about the only realm of commercialized sex where women are the primary targets.

Excellent point, Colly! (As always!)

So I wonder why? Any theories?

I don't think there is a stigma attached to male sexual solo-gratification, i.e. masturbation with a hand. So why is there one attached to toys?


Here's something else I don't understand: Perfectly straight (and not?) men can get together to watch porn --yet, most women (straight or otherwise?) would not do the same.

It's all so curious.

 

[Guest]

 

[TheEarl]

Excellent point, Colly! (As always!)

So I wonder why? Any theories?

I don't think there is a stigma attached to male sexual solo-gratification, i.e. masturbation with a hand. So why is there one attached to toys?


Here's something else I don't understand: Perfectly straight (and not?) men can get together to watch porn --yet, most women (straight or otherwise?) would not do the same.

It's all so curious.

I think it's because all masturbation is socially viewed as a bad thing. It's disgusting, depraved and you certainly shouldn't spend any money on it.

Women's masturbation and toys have become populist with clever marketing by shops like Ann Summers and stuff like Sex In The City, yet there's been nothing to raise male masturbation out of the 'you should be ashamed of yourself' category. And you don't spend money to try and improve the sensations of a disgusting and perverted act.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

 

[TheEarl]

OOooooOO!


Is THE Earl coming on to me!?

I am really sorry, I don't swing that way.

as the web page asks: "no, girlfriend?"

No, more pointing out that my viewpoint on solo gratification is not affected by my being a young, reasonably attractive sportsman, because I can't attract a woman for love nor money and thus am in the boat of 'not having sex'.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

 

[McKenna]

I think it's because all masturbation is socially viewed as a bad thing. It's disgusting, depraved and you certainly shouldn't spend any money on it.

Women's masturbation and toys have become populist with clever marketing by shops like Ann Summers and stuff like Sex In The City, yet there's been nothing to raise male masturbation out of the 'you should be ashamed of yourself' category. And you don't spend money to try and improve the sensations of a disgusting and perverted act.

The Earl

Sad, really, but I think you're spot on in your thinking. I can remember someone calling masturbation "abusing one's self." R-i-g-h-t.

I grew up in a house and religion where it was viewed as something really, terribly nasty. Didn't stop me from doing it, though the associated guilt was horribly repressive.

So I wonder if there's a big push for marketing male masturbation? I can seem to remember an episode of Seinfeld where the four main characters (3 men, 1 woman) had a contest to see who could go the longest without masturbating. That's the only incident I can think of (in somewhat recent times) where the taboo surrounding masturbation had been lifted.

 

[McKenna]

Similar is going to a titty bar (strip club)...been twice...not on my own accord. I enjoyed the visuals, BUT it's a bit like going to a restaraunt and just SHOWN the food which you have to PAY for.

Excellent point!

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Excellent point, Colly! (As always!)

So I wonder why? Any theories?

I don't think there is a stigma attached to male sexual solo-gratification, i.e. masturbation with a hand. So why is there one attached to toys?


Here's something else I don't understand: Perfectly straight (and not?) men can get together to watch porn --yet, most women (straight or otherwise?) would not do the same.

It's all so curious.

Hmm. My guess on the first, has to do with Victorian notions of morality. Dildos were prescribed by doctors as cures for "hysteria" which was a uniquely feminine condition as the name implies. I think too, there is some subconcious male conciet involved. In the first place, it has to be gratifying to assume your girlfriend needs something Phallic to get off. It also has to be a comfort to know she can just grab Mr. happy and not have to go out and find a guy to scratch that pahallic itch.

For guys, I think the stigma is one of ego. The implication of having a pocket pussy is that you aren't man enough to go out and get the real thing. i think a large proportion of men are insecure in their masculinity. Not in an orientation kind of way, but in that they are competitive by nature and constantly comparing themselves to their male cohorts. Admitting you have a fleshlight is a kind of tacit admission you aren't getting as much pussy as the guy next to you is.

As to watching porn together. I have a pet theory that most guys are more visually fixated, as far as stimulation goes, than most women. When guys talk about sex, it is my experience that they are very heavy on the way she looked or she should look. I think women are more caught up in the emotions and their conversations on sex, while just as raunchy ocasionally, tend to focus on more than the looks of their partners.

I love erotica, but I will select a good book over a good video 99 times in 100. I think most guys would select the video over the book 99 times in 100. Since most porn is marketed to males, I think it's easier for them to enjoy watching some hot chick getting laid and find some enjoyment. I think the percentage of women who would enjoy watching any particular flick is smaller and thus finding a group who would becomes an even more remote possibility.

 

[Guest]

 

[TheEarl]

As to watching porn together. I have a pet theory that most guys are more visually fixated, as far as stimulation goes, than most women. When guys talk about sex, it is my experience that they are very heavy on the way she looked or she should look. I think women are more caught up in the emotions and their conversations on sex, while just as raunchy ocasionally, tend to focus on more than the looks of their partners.

I love erotica, but I will select a good book over a good video 99 times in 100. I think most guys would select the video over the book 99 times in 100. Since most porn is marketed to males, I think it's easier for them to enjoy watching some hot chick getting laid and find some enjoyment. I think the percentage of women who would enjoy watching any particular flick is smaller and thus finding a group who would becomes an even more remote possibility.

I subscribe to that theory as well, although I am the 1/100 who prefers prose to video. On a brief tangent, can anyone tell me the appeal of blowjobs in (straight)male-oriented porn? I don't get it at all. I'm not really interested in the guy in the video/picture and seeing him get his rocks off does absolutely nothing for me. The only kind of video that appeals to me is one where the woman's obviously getting a lot of pleasure.

Am I missing the point? Anyone know why the blowjob shot seems to be so popular?

The Earl

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

 

[Colleen Thomas]

I subscribe to that theory as well, although I am the 1/100 who prefers prose to video. On a brief tangent, can anyone tell me the appeal of blowjobs in (straight)male-oriented porn? I don't get it at all. I'm not really interested in the guy in the video/picture and seeing him get his rocks off does absolutely nothing for me. The only kind of video that appeals to me is one where the woman's obviously getting a lot of pleasure.

Am I missing the point? Anyone know why the blowjob shot seems to be so popular?

The Earl

If you watch much commercial porn you will notice a couple of things quickly. One is that they try to use as many positions, points of action as possible in a short scene. Another is some of those positions are so awkward as to be laughable. The majority of those are porn standards, where the object is to make sure the camera has a clean angle. I think porn star males must be some very strong and limber fellows.

Porno is geared to guys and most guys love getting blowjobs. Most porn flicks have the woman moaning, groaning and otherwise showing you how much she enjoys giving head. Some girls do in real life. I have a freind who is just as enamoured of parcticing her oral skills on a guy as I am of mine with another woman. In the grand scheme, blow job scenes are so popular because they play to the male propensity to enjoy getting one. The idea isn't that you want to see Seemore Butt's cock. The idea is, you will identify with the guy and enjoy what the girl is doing to his/your cock.

 

[McKenna]

Hmm. My guess on the first, has to do with Victorian notions of morality. Dildos were prescribed by doctors as cures for "hysteria" which was a uniquely feminine condition as the name implies. I think too, there is some subconcious male conciet involved. In the first place, it has to be gratifying to assume your girlfriend needs something Phallic to get off. It also has to be a comfort to know she can just grab Mr. happy and not have to go out and find a guy to scratch that pahallic itch.

For guys, I think the stigma is one of ego. The implication of having a pocket pussy is that you aren't man enough to go out and get the real thing. i think a large proportion of men are insecure in their masculinity. Not in an orientation kind of way, but in that they are competitive by nature and constantly comparing themselves to their male cohorts. Admitting you have a fleshlight is a kind of tacit admission you aren't getting as much pussy as the guy next to you is.

As to watching porn together. I have a pet theory that most guys are more visually fixated, as far as stimulation goes, than most women. When guys talk about sex, it is my experience that they are very heavy on the way she looked or she should look. I think women are more caught up in the emotions and their conversations on sex, while just as raunchy ocasionally, tend to focus on more than the looks of their partners.

I love erotica, but I will select a good book over a good video 99 times in 100. I think most guys would select the video over the book 99 times in 100. Since most porn is marketed to males, I think it's easier for them to enjoy watching some hot chick getting laid and find some enjoyment. I think the percentage of women who would enjoy watching any particular flick is smaller and thus finding a group who would becomes an even more remote possibility.

Prescribed dildos?! Why is this the first I've heard of it! I wonder if I could get my insurance to pay for it.... All joking aside, I've tried various toys and have never found one to my liking. I prefer the real deal, I guess, and when that isn't available, I prefer my own hands/fingers.

I do agree that men tend to be more visual than female, but the voyeur in me really, really likes watching porn. There are few erotica authors that I find truly stimulating; it's not that they aren't out there, it's just that they are harder to find, even here at Lit. I'm all about instant gratification, I suppose, cause sometimes I just want to be hit with that visual.

That said, I prefer novels to watching t.v. or movies. Go figure....

I do think it is a male ego thing to "admit" to having toys and "admit" that they are not getting any of the real deal. Perhaps it harkens back to our very roots in some aspects. For instance, the most poweful male controls/protects/mates his "herd", and the larger his herd, the more powerful he is. A collection of fake females just isn't the same.

<snip>Am I missing the point? Anyone know why the blowjob shot seems to be so popular?

The blowjob scene does nothing for me, either. I would much rather see penetration. I'm surprised that a man would share this viewpoint, however. I always assumed blow-job scenes were in high demand, thus the reason they are so plentiful. I guess I thought the man watching the video would get off by imagining it's his penis that is getting all that feminine, oral attention.

<snip>
typically it's the guy's dufus expressions that turn me off.

AGREED! Of course, I never was a fan of the woman's incessant (and fake) moaning, either. And seriously, whose make-up/hair looks so damned perfect in the throes of passion? hmmm?

 

[AppleBiter]

I can't decide; Is this mildly arousing or merely amusing?


The Fleshlight


(Wait for the film to download, that's the best part.)


.

It's hot. Men jacking off is always hot . . . with hands or toys . . . whew!

 

[McKenna]

It's hot. Men jacking off is always hot . . . with hands or toys . . . whew!

Uh huh!

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

 

[Colleen Thomas]

OVERdubbed moaning doesn't work for me.

Make-up and hair perfect does NOT bother me.

But I doubt I would be bothered if it were mussd a bit either.

i love aural stimulation. Love to hear the moans & whimpers. that said, nothing is less erotic than when it goes over the top, as most pornos do.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

. . . it seems sex toys are about the only realm of commercialized sex where women are the primary targets.

Perhaps it is because most guys are basically extremely conservative about their style.

Look at men's dress clothes!

If any guy is at all experimental in his clothing sense, he will quite quickly be suspected of being gay.

I would think that anything a guy must wear on his penis to receive a blow job (especially when the traditional style is a woman's lips) would have even more inertia to overcome than something as impersonal – say – as a man's purse.

 

[Guest]

 

[impressive]

So why does male masturbation still carry a stigma? I think folks here have hit on some of it ... but perhaps not all. It always struck me as so wonderfully convenient, especially lathering up in the shower. Slippery, hot, and *sigh* very enjoyable to watch.

And what about the circle jerk thing? Is that a myth? I just can't see a bunch of women doing it ... although my childhood friend & I used to race.

 

[Guest]