The Hypochondriac Cafe

[lucky-E-leven]

and I thought my kid was scared of the bulb syringe!

No shit, right? Kids wouldn't bitch as much if they knew the alternative.

 

[Kandi]

Does not being able to get a firm grip on my writer's head qualify for hypocondria?

 

[carsonshepherd]

I think I popped my neck out of place giving someone a blow job at an awkward angle.

I don't think I'll be explaining this one to my chiropractor.

 

[Aurora Black]

*snicker*

 

[carsonshepherd]

Unless he agrees to send the bill to the guy I was blowing...

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Ugh....spent most of my day in a coma.
Stupid head cold.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Ugh....spent most of my day in a coma.
Stupid head cold.

Kiss you better

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Kiss you better

I'm really really reallly reallly sick.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I'm really really reallly reallly sick.

I can't find my doctor's uniform, but I do have my stethescope.

I have cold hands

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I can't find my doctor's uniform, but I do have my stethescope.

I have cold hands

I'll lift up my shirt and take deep breaths.

I think I have a fever...touch me.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I'll lift up my shirt and take deep breaths.

I think I have a fever...touch me.

Forever, and ever

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Forever, and ever

I'm feeling much better now.

 

[Dr_Strabismus]

I'll lift up my shirt and take deep breaths.

Nice big breaths...

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Nice big breaths...

Thank you Doctor.

 

[Dr_Strabismus]

i have a good bedside manner

 

[ABSTRUSE]

i have a good bedside manner

Is that your thermometer???

 

[Dr_Strabismus]

Is that your thermometer???

No, it's my speculum. Gosh you must be big.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

No, it's my speculum. Gosh you must be big.

I'm just big boned.

 

[Dr_Strabismus]

I'm just big boned.

I get that too sometimes

 

[Nirvanadragones]

My heart is beating incredibly fast, and I feel a little light headed . . .

and it's all Her fault

 

[ABSTRUSE]

My heart is beating incredibly fast, and I feel a little light headed . . .

and it's all Her fault

I keep telling you not to put helium in your blow up doll.

 

[neonlyte]

ANA results way too high
F*** this!

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I keep telling you not to put helium in your blow up doll.

If I can be jealous of a snake, I suppose you can be jealous of a doll

 

[ABSTRUSE]

If I can be jealous of a snake, I suppose you can be jealous of a doll

Don't forget the iguana.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Don't forget the iguana.

To go where no reptile has gone before?