The Isolated Blurt Thread XXXVII: You're Welcome, Fuckers

[FataMorgana]

I actually had my mammogram today.

I don't mind those. It's a bit just like whanging 'em on the photocopier. Smears, I hate. I had one once with a total bitch who couldn't find my cervix. She was getting quite irritable with me so I said "Well I haven't left it in my fuckin car". So she booked me in with another nurse who found it before I even got my undercrackers off.

 

[spacekowboy]

If you need help finding it ...

 

[FataMorgana]

If you need help finding it ...

I'll catch this bird for ya, but it ain't gonna be easy...

 

[spacekowboy]

I'll catch this bird for ya, but it ain't gonna be easy...

Not like going down the pond chasin' bluegills and tommycods. This shark, swallow you whole. Little shakin', little tenderizin', an' down you go.

 

[Wings]

I spent most of last week in Tupelo, Mississippi. I thought it was hot up here in Lake country, I was WRONG.

 

[TwinkleStars]

I don't mind those. It's a bit just like whanging 'em on the photocopier. Smears, I hate. I had one once with a total bitch who couldn't find my cervix. She was getting quite irritable with me so I said "Well I haven't left it in my fuckin car". So she booked me in with another nurse who found it before I even got my undercrackers off.

Ouch!

 

[phantom4533]

My hellhound loves to have cheeze-it’s for her afternoon snack. I brought her indoors ( for the 50th time today) and, tired from being outside in the heat, she plopped down on the floor and stretched out for some cool relaxation. When I got her snack she managed to lift her head up and waited for me to toss them to her. And, being the curious curmudgeon that I am, I wondered if I could flick “field goals” between her ears. Nope. She deftly blocked every attempt.

 

[Plasmaball]

I spent most of last week in Tupelo, Mississippi. I thought it was hot up here in Lake country, I was WRONG.

Its the wrong type of " being stuck inside an ass cheek"

 

[Plasmaball]

There is a leak in my garage now. So im gonna have to yank the wall down.
Just had to have this house.
Its gonna take me years to get this house right and then ill be dead.

 

[butters]

up before 8 this morning to beat the heat, picked blueberries

later on, back outside planting those mini salad peppers (plants I'd started from the leftover scraps), protecting them with the 2' high wire fencing, bringing in more cukes for pickling maybe tomorrow, more green beans. The first tomatoes are almost red and I picked a couple of fresh bell peppers. I need to weed the onion bed, potato beds, sweet potato bed and probably pick more corn.

 

[juttjaw]

All the chicks have come back home.. Three children have turned into three strong and independent women. That makes me very proud. Noises that this old house hasnt heard in a very long time. Noises these old ears have grown to appreciate and miss. Three short days and all will be quite and i will be empty again. Waiting for the next chance to hear the chaos.

For now, i am full. A whole person again. I need to concentrate on the feelings this time. I need to remember them to carry me till the next. They wont. They will fade away with time. How much time? I dont know... Its the not knowing that feels so empty. I remember that feeling too well. It never seems to fleet away like all the others. It sticks in the bottom of my gut and stays. Its been there for 18 years and will be there until I die. Hopefully, we all be together before that. Then again, one never knows.

 

[TwinkleStars]

I don't have breast cancer. While I already knew this, it's nice to have scientific proof that I don't.

 

[Wings]

Its the wrong type of " being stuck inside an ass cheek"

So true, I’m standing at my grandparent’s headstones and there’s no wind, 99° air temp, 105° feels like, and my mom says “well, if the heat gives me a heart attack at least it would be efficient.” Excuse me, ma’am? We aren’t dying today.

It made me treasure the 94° with a very strong wind back home in Chicago.

 

[HarryHill]

It's the perfect temperature for enjoying the outdoors, here. 62°F (16°C)

The BBQ will be done soon.

I hear its the lower 48's favorite destination this weekend.

 

[thør]

I hear its the lower 48's favorite destination this weekend.

They will be in Seward for the Marathon race, likely the world's toughest 5k. It's just an out and back, but the turnaround is a big rock way the fuck up the mountain. If you don't have a heart attack on the way up, you can alway trip and fall to your death on the way down.

We're at the cabin. a couple hundred miles from the festivities. Cooking here. Temps are in the low 70's this evening. Thank the good god thør for the propane fridge and the beer!

 

[pink]

All the chicks have come back home.. Three children have turned into three strong and independent women. That makes me very proud. Noises that this old house hasnt heard in a very long time. Noises these old ears have grown to appreciate and miss. Three short days and all will be quite and i will be empty again. Waiting for the next chance to hear the chaos.

For now, i am full. A whole person again. I need to concentrate on the feelings this time. I need to remember them to carry me till the next. They wont. They will fade away with time. How much time? I dont know... Its the not knowing that feels so empty. I remember that feeling too well. It never seems to fleet away like all the others. It sticks in the bottom of my gut and stays. Its been there for 18 years and will be there until I die. Hopefully, we all be together before that. Then again, one never knows.

I felt like that when Jennifer went to college. I was lost. I kept thinking who knows where she'll go after college??? It was an awful feeling.

It's still not a great feeling now, being apart but she's settled, stable and healthy. Now, I'm the one who flew and found my wings. I found myself, in the mean time, and she's never farther than a phone or a flight.

 

[Plasmaball]

So true, I’m standing at my grandparent’s headstones and there’s no wind, 99° air temp, 105° feels like, and my mom says “well, if the heat gives me a heart attack at least it would be efficient.” Excuse me, ma’am? We aren’t dying today.

It made me treasure the 94° with a very strong wind back home in Chicago.

I like around mid 70s with a warm breeze.
Ill still take 90s over 10s but yeah

 

[HarryHill]

I just got scammed while searching on PCH. Pop up saying I had searched one billion times on GOOGLE. I am such a dumb ass.

 

[thør]

on PCH

You were on the Pacific Coast Highway? That's a long way from home.

 

[thør]

Oh, and 60°F this morning at the cabin, with a possibility of a blistering 70°F later today. The corned beef hash was quite tasty this morning. Not much on the agenda today other than a little weedwacking.

 

[phantom4533]

Oh, and 60°F this morning at the cabin, with a possibility of a blistering 70°F later today. The corned beef hash was quite tasty this morning. Not much on the agenda today other than a little weedwacking.

There used to be a place locally that served a brisket hash that was the best I’ve ever had in a restaurant.

 

[thør]

There used to be a place locally that served a brisket hash that was the best I’ve ever had in a restaurant.

Grandma used to make sheet-pan hash in the oven. I wish I'd have observed a bit more. I've never been able to get even close to her oven hash. A skillet, no problem.

 

[butters]

so today I canned close to 2 gallons of cukes

this evening I brought in a further 6 pints of them and some asparagus green beans

tomorrow morning I need to get out before the sun climbs too high to pick blueberries and corn, and the sweet potatoes need cleaning out of weeds. We may get around to rescuing the mower from the ditch where it's stuck... likely in the one of the same 3 spots it gets stuck every year when the grass is long and the ground still very wet. *sigh*

 

[islandman]

Since when do Brits measure in gallons?

Amazon now has a Canyon store........*hides credit card*

 

[thør]

Amazon now has a Canyon store

Prime day is coming.