Things That Make You Uncomfortable....But Also Turn You On

[PrettyLilPussy19]

*tsk*

Negative points for involving others in your kink without their consent.

This.

 

[FAITHandFLESH]

My wife flirting with another man...

 

[AlwaysFara]

When we're sitting in a booth in a restaurant or club, he looks me in the eye and says, "Take off your panties... now!" And after I do, he sniffs them, comments on how wet they are, and then places them on the table so that the waiter or anyone passing by can see them & know my shame.

*tsk*

Negative points for involving others in your kink without their consent.

This.

Agreed.
Who the fuck are you?

That makes me uncomfortable, but you’d get your ass kicked.

 

[JerseyJade]

Would you prefer a male doing it?

Nope.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Nope.

 

[Phosphene]

 

[Soraya1]

*tsk*

Negative points for involving others in your kink without their consent.

And negative point right back at you, for deciding you were the self-appointed judge of others.

 

[Smoothshavendad]

So hot!

 

[Smoothshavendad]

Me too. I like all of it, including the pain. It makes me wet.

This is a turn on to read...

 

[bluekitty69]

Hot but feeling quilty

Something I just started to read about...age play having a little of my own...it makes me squirm in embarrassment that I'm interested in that and I'm not actually looking for it but sometimes....

 

[AnnieLit]

*tsk*

Negative points for involving others in your kink without their consent.

I think this is mostly going on in her head. Waiter might see a piece of fabric, but I doubt he will recognise it for what it is. Even less will he know that they are wet.

 

[AlwaysFara]

And negative point right back at you, for deciding you were the self-appointed judge of others.

Ummmm, don’t you do it to get a reaction?

You got one.

Like servers don’t have a hard enough job without worrying about your body fluids left in some panties for them.

 

[Bramblethorn]

And negative point right back at you, for deciding you were the self-appointed judge of others.

If we don't want BDSM conflated with predatory behaviour, then we need to be scrupulous about other people's boundaries. That means pointing out to other kinksters when they cross that line. "The standard you walk by is the standard you accept" and all that.

The server in a restaurant isn't free to say "please stop doing that, this isn't what I signed up for" because they could get fired for that. The Customer Is Always Right. So somebody has to. If we don't talk to our own about issues of consent, why should anybody else take us seriously when we talk about how consent is intrinsic to BDSM?

I've lost count of the number of times I've made myself the killjoy and somebody has told me "thanks, I was feeling uncomfortable but didn't know how to speak out". I know a lot of BDSMers have had to do a lot of work to accept ourselves, but "don't kink-shame" doesn't trump consent.

 

[cookiecat]

When we're sitting in a booth in a restaurant or club, he looks me in the eye and says, "Take off your panties... now!" And after I do, he sniffs them, comments on how wet they are, and then places them on the table so that the waiter or anyone passing by can see them & know my shame.

So let's say he places the panties near his napkin so it's not uber obvious but you aren't 100% sure - maybe someone will see them? Still shameful and wet but not overt.

Total sidebar but I saw this scene in one of the 50 Shades movies (except no sniffing or commenting) and she had these hot heels on. I could only think omg - what if they get stuck on her stiletto? I wonder if my feet look as smooth? Will she hit her head on the table? This is the exact reason I like wearing a hood or earplugs or a gag during play. I have to get outside my head.

Anyways, it's the first time I saw the movie. I think it was the second one? the Darker one. For as much vitriole I heard spewed about this movie, I thought it was a little hot and fun to watch. There was a spreader bar situation that seemed a bit unreal but was still arousing.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

 

[TheleHun]

H.R. Giger art books. I remember finding one when I was a young man and getting a huge erection and being terrified at the same time.

 

[gracie920101]

Suspension

I like hard bondage and predicament bondage but add in suspension and I back away. I just don't want it.

 

[JerseyJade]

When I notice a man staring at me and I can see his arousal in his shorts. This has happened a few times when I have gone to the beach.

 

[FAITHandFLESH]

The idea of my wife with another man...

 

[base10]

When I notice a man staring at me and I can see his arousal in his shorts. This has happened a few times when I have gone to the beach.

I hesitate to think what would happen at a nude beach then

 

[twister947]

Suspension

I like hard bondage and predicament bondage but add in suspension and I back away. I just don't want it.

Much of the suspension porn I see makes me cringe. People that climb and work off the ground know what I mean. There is a cavalier disregard of safety.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Tongue biting and tongue pinching and clothespins on my tongue.

 

[QuasiSemiDemiEsqueIsh]

You know it when you see it.
Filthy. Rough. Too intimate. Too taboo.

It makes you cringe. Squirm. Wince. But... you cant stop thinking about it....

Show and Tell time!!

Consensual Nonconsent. I’m a rape survivor, but I was interested in CNC before I was assaulted. Being able to reclaim that interest was a really big step for me. I still have to be really careful with it and make sure my partners know all the details of my assault, as well as known and potential triggers (and obviously make sure safe words are in place); I still get uncomfortable pretty much every time, but it’s worth working past that discomfort when I’m able.

Similarly, face-slapping and many forms of degradation always seem super hot to me, but it’s triggered flashbacks of my abuse every time I’ve tried to dip my toes in. My therapist has suggested that I’ll eventually be able to handle it, but for now I have to keep it limited to fantasies.

I’ll give another answer on a lighter note to balance that out. Suspension is another one. I’m pretty chubby, and even though I’ve been assured by people who know what they’re doing that there are ways to suspend me relatively safely, I get way too caught up in potential problems, and I’d probably never be able to do it—not at my current size, anyway. That’s disappointing to me, because I think it would feel pretty freeing. It certainly seems fun.

Also fisting. I find the descriptions of it in stories really fascinating, and sometimes tempting, but just the idea of a whole fist being inside me makes me shudder (not in a good way) and cringe. When I actually stop and think about it happening *to me*, it goes from fascinating to a definite “nope!”

 

[Blase]

When I notice a man staring at me and I can see his arousal in his shorts. This has happened a few times when I have gone to the beach.

I hesitate to think what would happen at a nude beach then

Typically, the answer is "nothing". Once you're past adolescence, it's not so difficult to keep from hoisting the flag if you don't want to - and no one wants to be seen as a rube.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Watching a man play with his own nipples.