To Facial...?

[infinity706]

Ok, so equals was the wrong word. I hope we can agree that most porn actresses are far from exploited.

Yeah, I think women as a whole might have more power in the porn industry than in anything else in the world. Of course, the internet has increased that even more. Now, any woman that wants to can easily have her own website and make a ton of money without even having to work with a company. If anything, it would be the poor guys that are exploited, but a lot of them are just there to get fucked anyway, so actually getting paid for such a thing is just a bonus anyway. It's not like many of them wouldn't fuck the starlet for free.

 

[smoochmycooch]

I think a lot of it comes down to slight pain (stinging the eyes), degredation (feeling like a cum dumpster), and vanity (it messes up my hair) as to why I don't like facials. But maybe that is just me *shrugs*

 

[Petra5]

What is the deal...

...with a guy wanting to blow his load on a woman's face? Can any guy here tell me why it is such a turn on??? I just don't get it. If someone can give me a plausibly erotic reason why it is so good, I MIGHT be willing to give it a try. Otherwise, I can only imagine it to be just a bit messy and not very sexy. I love to see a guy cumming, and feel it all over my body. But face????

As for Bambikiller

'The second girl had an advertion to swallowing.
So I started asking her if she was going to swallow or not as she was sucking away.
She'd shake her head no and then I'd pull out and soak her face with my load. I didn't ask I just did it. She didn't like it but never said anything about it. After about two months she started swallowing.'

What an asshole! Yet another prick who gets off on coercing a woman to do something she doesn't like. When will guys like you do us all a favour and crawl back under the rock you crawled out from? The ONLY REASON she started swallowing is because out of the two 'options' you gave her, it was preferable. Why didn't you stop wasting her time and yours and just find a girl who wanted it in the first place? Better still, have the respect for her to be happy enough with what she gave you, rather than pushing her boundaries. Or do guys like you get your rocks off on this kind of power play? Unless - of course, the play is both ways - i.e. - she gets her turn at making you do something you are less than comfortable with.

 

[pixx1223]

I just had to reply to this thread. First of all let me just say that oral sex is a major turn on for me. I also have no problem whatsoever swallowing. However, if a guy ever let go on my face we would be having a serious talk.

1. I have taken the time to do my very long hair in a seductive fashion for your pleasure, for you to run your fingers through or pull if you like. Large gobs of cum drying in that hair is not pleasant.

2. Up the nose sucks!

3. For those of you that never got a shot in the eye. HELLO!! It burns like hell. Mix in my makeup and well, let's just say "it ain't pretty."

So please ask her first. If she doesn't mind by all means. Make sure you tell her to close her eyes and maybe have a warm washcloth close by.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

It is possible for a considerate lover to give a facial without firing it up the nose and into the eyes. There must be women who refuse facials for more than practical reasons. Personally, I don't get what is so abhorrent about facials to women.

 

[romantic_always]

It is possible for a considerate lover to give a facial without firing it up the nose and into the eyes. There must be women who refuse facials for more than practical reasons. Personally, I don't get what is so abhorrent about facials to women.

For me personally, I don't think I could receive that and then cuddle afterward. There is just something to me personally that repels this idea. I've told my partner that it is pretty much the only thing I'm unwilling to do. Luckily for me, he is also pretty turned off by the idea, so it's not a problem.

However, I can see how if done with care and less degradation, it could be alright for some. I think it needs to be approached in a non-porno way if you really want your girlfriend to go along with it the first time, unless it is something that she's into.

 

[infinity706]

I don't really get what the big deal about facials is, but I'm a guy, so I probably don't count no matter how many cocks I suck. Closing your eyes is a good idea, though.

 

[Lurnk]

It is possible for a considerate lover to give a facial without firing it up the nose and into the eyes. There must be women who refuse facials for more than practical reasons. Personally, I don't get what is so abhorrent about facials to women.

I'm not understanding why there should be reasons beyond "I don't want to." Yet, the fact that there are reasons, practical and not, should be the end of it.

As far as porn goes, I'm wondering how getting tons of money precludes exploitation. I thought it was understood that most porn caters to male viewers.

The porn actresses I've seen are clearly acting--badly. From my viewpoint, many women who don't enjoy porn see this and don't like it. So, why should they enjoy watching these women pretend to enjoy themselves?

 

[infinity706]

Well, in some of the less mainstream porn, some of the women are really wild and seem a lot more into it. It's like they came to get fucked and the money is just a nice bonus.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

I'm not understanding why there should be reasons beyond "I don't want to." Yet, the fact that there are reasons, practical and not, should be the end of it.

As far as porn goes, I'm wondering how getting tons of money precludes exploitation. I thought it was understood that most porn caters to male viewers.

The porn actresses I've seen are clearly acting--badly. From my viewpoint, many women who don't enjoy porn see this and don't like it. So, why should they enjoy watching these women pretend to enjoy themselves?

There don't have to be reasons beyond 'I don't want to' but I was wondering what they would be if there were. Women go into the porn industry for the money and many of them are terrible actors. Porn is aimed at men because a good 80-90% of it is bought by men, that's just the nature of the market. I don't think it make the women more or less 'exploited' by taking a fat paycheck for pretending to enjoy sex. I once saw a prostitute interviewed in a documentary and she was asked how she could let herself be so exploited by men. The woman raised an eyebrow and replied, 'No darling, it is I who exploit stupid, wealthy men with credit cards.' It's all really a matter of perspective.

There's plenty of porn aimed at women and most of it still contains facials. I just don't get the automatic assumption that facials are derogatory and degrading. There are still women who come on Lit thinking that giving a BJ at all is degrading. It's all in the eye of the beholder and I posted what I said before because it's a knee-jerk response by many women that I don't get.

Either a lover respects his woman or he doesn't. If he does, why would wanting to give a facial make him less respectful of her and less worthy as a SO/life-partner? If he doesn't, why is the woman having sex with him in the first place?

 

[Lurnk]

There don't have to be reasons beyond 'I don't want to' but I was wondering what they would be if there were. Women go into the porn industry for the money and many of them are terrible actors. Porn is aimed at men because a good 80-90% of it is bought by men, that's just the nature of the market. I don't think it make the women more or less 'exploited' by taking a fat paycheck for pretending to enjoy sex. I once saw a prostitute interviewed in a documentary and she was asked how she could let herself be so exploited by men. The woman raised an eyebrow and replied, 'No darling, it is I who exploit stupid, wealthy men with credit cards.' It's all really a matter of perspective.

Perhaps I shouldn't have written the word "badly." It's the very fact that they're acting in the first place that I have a problem with--it has nothing to do with the money. Two people on screen are having sex, why is the acting even necessary?

I understand how these film are made--editing, timing, long days, fluffers, etc. But if I'm going to look at porn and like it--no matter who it's aimed at--shouldn't I see two people getting off instead of one? Shouldn't it be filmed in such a way that shows the actress wanting to, if not actually, enjoying herself?

There's plenty of porn aimed at women and most of it still contains facials. I just don't get the automatic assumption that facials are derogatory and degrading. There are still women who come on Lit thinking that giving a BJ at all is degrading. It's all in the eye of the beholder and I posted what I said before because it's a knee-jerk response by many women that I don't get.

I find the concept of "porn for women" suspect, but I'm not an avid viewer of porn anyway, so I can't comment too much.

The facial as a derogatory and degrading act, as I see it, is based on the notion that many people--men and women alike--think semen is vile, disgusting stuff. That explains the threads around here started by folks wanting to make it more palatable.

Thus, a woman swallowing semen or taking it on the face is dirtied by the act and consequently degraded. Obviously degradation flips lots of switches, which may explain why it's included in porn for women, but it doesn't work for everyone.

Either a lover respects his woman or he doesn't. If he does, why would wanting to give a facial make him less respectful of her and less worthy as a SO/life-partner? If he doesn't, why is the woman having sex with him in the first place?

Even if a man respects or says he respects a woman, his actions aren't automatically cleansed of disrespect. He can be great in some ways and a douche in others. Respect isn't perfect.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Perhaps I shouldn't have written the word "badly." It's the very fact that they're acting in the first place that I have a problem with--it has nothing to do with the money. Two people on screen are having sex, why is the acting even necessary?

I understand how these film are made--editing, timing, long days, fluffers, etc. But if I'm going to look at porn and like it--no matter who it's aimed at--shouldn't I see two people getting off instead of one? Shouldn't it be filmed in such a way that shows the actress wanting to, if not actually, enjoying herself?

I guess you could argue that but in reality neither of the stars can really enjoy themselves all that much with the length of time these things take to film in front of a group of people. Guys aren't really required to make much noise or put on as much of a show as the woman so I think the assumption of the guy always getting more enjoyment as the girl is simplistic.

The facial as a derogatory and degrading act, as I see it, is based on the notion that many people--men and women alike--think semen is vile, disgusting stuff. That explains the threads around here started by folks wanting to make it more palatable.

Thus, a woman swallowing semen or taking it on the face is dirtied by the act and consequently degraded. Obviously degradation flips lots of switches, which may explain why it's included in porn for women, but it doesn't work for everyone.

Well that's your opinion. I don't view semen as 'vile and disgusting' but as unequivocal evidence of my partner's enjoyment and satisfaction. I have no problem with facials or swallowing and I only feel 'dirtied and degraded' if our kinky play has taken that direction and it gives me a kick to feel used. We're clearly very different people and these are personal views. One is no more right or true than the other.

Even if a man respects or says he respects a woman, his actions aren't automatically cleansed of disrespect. He can be great in some ways and a douche in others. Respect isn't perfect.

True but I meant that in a very general sense. Either he'll respect you in the morning or he won't and what you get up to in the interim should have no bearing on that if it's consensual, legal and mutually enjoyed. I would go so far as to say if a guy knows a girl isn't into facials and she accepts one purely to give him pleasure, she should be especially respected in the morning, bought breakfast and possibly married by noon. Kinky deviants like me are way in the minority.

 

[Lurnk]

I guess you could argue that but in reality neither of the stars can really enjoy themselves all that much with the length of time these things take to film in front of a group of people. Guys aren't really required to make much noise or put on as much of a show as the woman so I think the assumption of the guy always getting more enjoyment as the girl is simplistic.

Well, if putting on a show was all it took, there would be no problem. However, it's not about putting on a show, it's about enjoyment, which doesn't require silly noises and ridiculous flailing. I'm basing the guy's pleasure mostly on the simple fact that he gets to come.

Well that's your opinion. I don't view semen as 'vile and disgusting' but as unequivocal evidence of my partner's enjoyment and satisfaction. I have no problem with facials or swallowing and I only feel 'dirtied and degraded' if our kinky play has taken that direction and it gives me a kick to feel used. We're clearly very different people and these are personal views. One is no more right or true than the other.

I don't see that way, either, but I understand why many do. I was merely giving you reasons.

True but I meant that in a very general sense. Either he'll respect you in the morning or he won't and what you get up to in the interim should have no bearing on that if it's consensual, legal and mutually enjoyed. I would go so far as to say if a guy knows a girl isn't into facials and she accepts one purely to give him pleasure, she should be especially respected in the morning, bought breakfast and possibly married by noon. Kinky deviants like me are way in the minority.

I think context is quite important, but I agree for the most part, especially with the breakfast bit.

 

[subwannabe]

Petra5:

I pretty much agree with what most women have said about not wanting a facial, but, since you asked, I think you are looking at this through a woman's perspective. It is like a Mars-Venus type of thing. First of all, almost all of us can have a turn-on that is not really understood by the other party or the other sex. It is just a turn on for them and hopefully the other person respects the other person's turn-on enough to help them experience it. I also believe that if something really turns you off and you find it disgusting, that the other person should be sensitive enough to your dislikes that they don't expect you to do something that you really don't want to do. I think somewhere in there I answered your question - it is just a turn on for men wanting to shoot their load onto their partner's face. I don't think there is any eloquent answer to it any more than it is just a huge turn on for them and the only understanding involved is if the partner understands that turn on enough to satisfy the other's needs or decides that it is just such a turn off to them that they are unwilling to help their partner out with this one turn on.

 

[SmartSexySkype]

Even a male has to agree

I think a lot of it comes down to slight pain (stinging the eyes), degredation (feeling like a cum dumpster), and vanity (it messes up my hair) as to why I don't like facials. But maybe that is just me *shrugs*

he sees the point in this post My guess is that Smooch is not alone.

 

[Plainly_Jane]

To the OP, I second the suggestions of those who said you should ask your g/f first, preferably not in the heat of the moment, and see if she'd be open or desirous of having you cum on her face. Being happy and willing to swallow cum does not equate to also being happy to receive a facial. Never assume, unless you don't mind gambling that the action might come to a screeching halt.

It is possible for a considerate lover to give a facial without firing it up the nose and into the eyes. There must be women who refuse facials for more than practical reasons. Personally, I don't get what is so abhorrent about facials to women.

Why I don't like facials: 1) it's messy and I just don't like messy goop on my face, no matter the origin; 2) some could go into my hair which would really fry me and I'd let loose with a whole string of cuss words while telling him to get the fuck out and stay out you sonofabitch; 3) and I just find it rude behavior. It's like when I see a bride and groom smash wedding cake into each other's face -- I find that stupid and pointless. That's what cumming on my face seems like to me -- here honey, take this! Not erotic.

I'm not understanding why there should be reasons beyond "I don't want to." Yet, the fact that there are reasons, practical and not, should be the end of it.

As far as porn goes, I'm wondering how getting tons of money precludes exploitation. I thought it was understood that most porn caters to male viewers.
The porn actresses I've seen are clearly acting--badly. From my viewpoint, many women who don't enjoy porn see this and don't like it. So, why should they enjoy watching these women pretend to enjoy themselves?

That's one of the reasons I don't really enjoy mainstream porn, or really much of the porn I've ever seen. Here's what seems to be the M.O. of a lot of the stuff on youporn, for example. (I'm referring to MF porn). Man enters room where woman is lying on bed; maybe some quick groping goes on, then they undress themselves, then back on the bed, then the woman goes down on the guy. Sometimes he pulls her hair, sometimes he just holds her head and fucks her face, and perhaps 20% of the time, he might make some motions like he's trying to turn her on in some fashion, but usually the idea is that she gets hot and bothered by pleasuring him and nothing extra is necessary. Then the sex begins, and it's designed so the camera can get the best angle of the penis penetrating either the vagina or the ass. The woman moans unconvincingly, sometimes the man does too.

No kissing, no tenderness, no eroticism allowed. Lots of position changing. more moaning, more of the woman sucking the man's cock. Back to more penetration, maybe some ass slapping. Contortions abound. Very little eye contact. Zero warmth to the whole thing. Boring as fuck!!! Then the money shot where the guy pulls his cock out and shoots it somewhere on the woman. she moans again, looking as bored as I am.

And some men wonder why their g/f doesn't want to watch porn with them.

Oh, and then it's always amusing to hear other moaning in the background, as you can tell other porn is being filmed in a nearby room! I really wish there was truly erotic porn for women out there, but it's as elusive as Camelot. You hear about how one time, in a mythical land, such a thing existed, but you never seem to find it yourself.

I find the concept of "porn for women" suspect, but I'm not an avid viewer of porn anyway, so I can't comment too much.

The facial as a derogatory and degrading act, as I see it, is based on the notion that many people--men and women alike--think semen is vile, disgusting stuff. That explains the threads around here started by folks wanting to make it more palatable.

I don't think semen is disgusting at all -- I just don't want it sprayed all over my face, hair, eyes, etc.

...with a guy wanting to blow his load on a woman's face? Can any guy here tell me why it is such a turn on??? I just don't get it. If someone can give me a plausibly erotic reason why it is so good, I MIGHT be willing to give it a try. Otherwise, I can only imagine it to be just a bit messy and not very sexy. I love to see a guy cumming, and feel it all over my body. But face????

Someone else said it already and I believe it's true -- it's the lemming effect. You see it in porn and suddenly everyone thinks that's the latest cool thing to do.

 

[shycoyote]

Interesting discussion. A situation I hadn't given much though....

I think you guys might want to try bridging the gap between kinky/porn-style and love-making..

Maybe while you are making love look in her eyes, then touch her face and whisper something like, "You are so beautiful I want to cum all over your face". I'd let you.... At least that will have introduced the topic.

I might be unusual though - I get turned on by what turns on my partner so anything goes... well everything so far.

I had no idea that cumming on a woman's face was such a turn on.
Cool.

 

[Plainly_Jane]

Interesting discussion. A situation I hadn't given much though....

I think you guys might want to try bridging the gap between kinky/porn-style and love-making..

Maybe while you are making love look in her eyes, then touch her face and whisper something like, "You are so beautiful I want to cum all over your face". I'd let you.... At least that will have introduced the topic.

Ah, great suggestion

I'd still say no, but I'd make it up in other ways simply because of the way it was asked.

 

[shycoyote]

I think gauging her reaction in that situation would be key... say it like in the heat of the moment, plant the seed. She might be really into it - or she might pretend she didn't even hear it. At least you'd know what you were dealing with.
I would much prefer someone to cum on my face than inside my mouth. I thought swallowing was the ultimate.

 

[Lurnk]

<snippers>

That's one of the reasons I don't really enjoy mainstream porn, or really much of the porn I've ever seen. Here's what seems to be the M.O. of a lot of the stuff on youporn, for example. (I'm referring to MF porn). Man enters room where woman is lying on bed; maybe some quick groping goes on, then they undress themselves, then back on the bed, then the woman goes down on the guy. Sometimes he pulls her hair, sometimes he just holds her head and fucks her face, and perhaps 20% of the time, he might make some motions like he's trying to turn her on in some fashion, but usually the idea is that she gets hot and bothered by pleasuring him and nothing extra is necessary. Then the sex begins, and it's designed so the camera can get the best angle of the penis penetrating either the vagina or the ass. The woman moans unconvincingly, sometimes the man does too.

No kissing, no tenderness, no eroticism allowed. Lots of position changing. more moaning, more of the woman sucking the man's cock. Back to more penetration, maybe some ass slapping. Contortions abound. Very little eye contact. Zero warmth to the whole thing. Boring as fuck!!! Then the money shot where the guy pulls his cock out and shoots it somewhere on the woman. she moans again, looking as bored as I am.

Yep, there you have it.

If you're lucky, you get those rare and half-assed attempts at oral on his part: His tongue's going one million miles to nowhere, perhaps on her clit, perhaps not. He's got two fingers jabbing at her, seemingly anxious to kill something inside her. On top of that, our guy's grimacing like she's just farted.

Yeah, real sexy.

And some men wonder why their g/f doesn't want to watch porn with them.

Oh, and then it's always amusing to hear other moaning in the background, as you can tell other porn is being filmed in a nearby room! I really wish there was truly erotic porn for women out there, but it's as elusive as Camelot. You hear about how one time, in a mythical land, such a thing existed, but you never seem to find it yourself.

Mythical, indeed.

 

[wildehafer]

Just on the flip side, does any woman think twice about her own pussy juice smeared all over a guys face and dripping off his chin as her eats her out, much to her own pleasure?

Not that facials do anything for me personally, but whats sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander

It's just sex fluids. What's the big deal?

 

[AgonySceneGirl]

Hey, I was just looking for some advice on talking to my girlfriend about cumming on her face without sounding like a pervert. She loves to swallow my load and always asks me to cum in her mouth when we have sex so I feel about 75% confident that she would cool with it, but I am just not sure and I don't want to make anything awkward.

Any tips?

i dated a guy that was majorly into that - yeah i prefered to take it in the mouth because it wasnt as messy lol but when he got it all over my face i loved it and showed it. just disliked the mess.
first time he asked me - i was really surprized, completely shocked that someone would ask. but i wasnt opposed so i let him. but made him lick it off my lips which actually turned into more fun for us man i kinda miss that.

 

[SallyIsHere]

Flinch

Whether it is a loaded gun or a loaded dick, waiting for something that is pointing at your face to go off is not all that pleasant. I flinch and most do. It is not that erotic. Too many men take their cues from porn and too many women take their cues from men. Women with shaved genitals having sex in high heels until a guy pulls out and cums on their face are largely targeting the audience of adolescent males who watch a lot of internet porn. I think two adults should be able to come up with wider variety of ways of abandoning themselves to desire than is provided by porn. And if it is degrading to the woman, it is degrading, period. She gets to call that shot. If she wants to pee on his face, it's his call.
It's called mutual respect. If a guy surprises me with a load to my face he has shared my bed for the last time.

 

[subwannabe]

I truly believe that 90% of the porn audience is male, male, male. Some female "directors" have taken a stab at making porn for women but seem to have failed to actually develop porn FOR women. They must realize that even still, 90% of the audience is male, so they go after the audience and not the women. My wife and I have yet taken another stab at finding porn for couples, only to be disappointed again. It is still directed at a male audience. Our most recent attempt showed several couples in different segments and it was always the women sucking a guy off with no orgasm, followed by fucking in various positions while wearing a condom, ending with more sucking and finally the guy shooting his load all over her face. There was even a F/F scene thrown in. Funny how "couples" porn often has a f/f scene but never seems to have a m/m scene! We want an erotic movie between one man and one woman that is mostly plot with some erotic regular scenes and some downright XXX scenes with some kind of erotic seduction lovemaking going on between one man and one woman. If real life people can make love for an hour then why can't some porn directors make a porn flick with just one couple making love for an hour with a realistic plot thrown in?

 

[Plainly_Jane]

Yep, there you have it.

If you're lucky, you get those rare and half-assed attempts at oral on his part: His tongue's going one million miles to nowhere, perhaps on her clit, perhaps not. He's got two fingers jabbing at her, seemingly anxious to kill something inside her. On top of that, our guy's grimacing like she's just farted.
Yeah, real sexy.

Mythical, indeed.

LOL @ the "seemingly anxious to kill something" comment. Is it any wonder that many women don't find standard porn worth watching. Their pleasure is so clearly not a consideration.

Just on the flip side, does any woman think twice about her own pussy juice smeared all over a guys face and dripping off his chin as her eats her out, much to her own pleasure?

Not that facials do anything for me personally, but whats sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander

It's just sex fluids. What's the big deal?

To be flip in return, no I never think twice about it

To be serious, I don't want a man going down on me who doesn't want to be there wholeheartedly. Don't do it if you don't like it, that's my motto. I want my partner to be enjoying the whole thing, and I hope my partner feels the same way about me too.

Whether it is a loaded gun or a loaded dick, waiting for something that is pointing at your face to go off is not all that pleasant. I flinch and most do. It is not that erotic. Too many men take their cues from porn and too many women take their cues from men. Women with shaved genitals having sex in high heels until a guy pulls out and cums on their face are largely targeting the audience of adolescent males who watch a lot of internet porn. I think two adults should be able to come up with wider variety of ways of abandoning themselves to desire than is provided by porn. And if it is degrading to the woman, it is degrading, period. She gets to call that shot. If she wants to pee on his face, it's his call.
It's called mutual respect. If a guy surprises me with a load to my face he has shared my bed for the last time.

Yep.