Tolkien Fans: Comments and Questions

[Bamagan]

I really wish I could stab people in the face over the Internet.

I'm sure Google and Microsoft are working on it.

 

[StillStunned]

I'm sure Google and Microsoft are working on it.

And most people would still barely look up from their phones.

 

[Bamagan]

And most people would still barely look up from their phones.

Well, once they've got AppleStab and G'nife and MS Brutus sorted, there's even fewer reasons to fuss about reality.

 

[SimonDoom]

Well, once they've got AppleStab and G'nife and MS Brutus sorted, there's even fewer reasons to fuss about reality.

Oh, I think experience demonstrates otherwise. Every new Internet development creates new reasons to fuss.

 

[Bamagan]

Oh, I think experience demonstrates otherwise. Every new Internet development creates new reasons to fuss.

Yeah, bunch of babies whining about getting stabbed. It's over in a second! Not like crucifixion.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I really wish I could stab people in the face over the Internet.

Hey Wanda. Google "Gandalf big naturals". You can thank me later.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I'm sure Google and Microsoft are working on it.

Opening Adobe always makes me feel like I'm being stabbed in the face.

 

[onehitwanda]

Hey Wanda. Google "Gandalf big naturals". You can thank me later.

I hate you with the rage of a billion suns.

 

[StillStunned]

So who had the biggest boobies in Middle-Earth? I'm going to say Melian, mostly for being a sexy Maia.

 

[Bramblethorn]

So who had the biggest boobies in Middle-Earth? I'm going to say Melian, mostly for being a sexy Maia.

I'm going to say Ungoliant, because she's the largest female character in the story and well known for having lots of children.

 

[BeechLeaf]

That's not JRRT turning in his grave, it's him getting out of it and shambling towards you with his hands making clutching, strangling gestures.

 

[Bramblethorn]

That's not JRRT turning in his grave, it's him getting out of it and shambling towards you with his hands making clutching, strangling gestures.

 

[StillStunned]

I suspect Goldberry also has a certain lushness about her. The kind of body you'd enjoy seeing in a dirndl.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I suspect Goldberry also has a certain lushness about her. The kind of body you'd enjoy seeing in a dirndl.

"There my pretty lady is, River-woman's daughter,
Slender as the willow-wand, clearer than the water."

 

[astuffedshirt_perv]

That's my interpretation of the whole thing.

Fly into Mordor with a bunch of eagles, and the Nazgul see 'em miles off and it's a turkey feast.

Arg, this again. Sorry I'm late to the thread

I'm sorry, but not flying the eagles to Mt Doom is a plot hole. And that's fine, at the time Airpower wasn't well developed. JRRT couldn't think through the absolute game changer flying eagles bring to the table. Many, many, many authors (and fanboys) make the same error.
The eagles are faster and more agile than the fell-beasts. Sauron was not expecting anyone to try and destroy the ring. A flight of eagles at near 200 mph gives Sauron and the Nazgul minimal time to figure out what is going on, mount, get airborne, and intercept...which isn't going to work. It is why modern militaries have planes up all the time in Defensive Counter Air: there just isn't time to scramble.
Also, imagine Messi at his own goal with 7 sumos at midfield. Messi has to get through them to get to the other goal. My money is on Messi. In 3D space the problem becomes vastly more difficult. Which is why, again, modern militaries spend so much money on homing missiles.
"The eagles would have stolen the ring" and "The eagles wouldn't have agreed to do it" also don't carry much water.
None of this detracts from an absolutely great work of literature.

 

[TheLobster]

So who had the biggest boobies in Middle-Earth? I'm going to say Melian, mostly for being a sexy Maia.

Yavanna is the mommy for the whole nature, and especially fruits that are ripe and juicy, so I'd bet on her.

 

[onehitwanda]

And that's fine, at the time Airpower wasn't well developed. JRRT couldn't think through the absolute game changer flying eagles bring to the table.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to call shenanigans on this. Tolkien wrote the Lord of the Rings between the late 1930s and 1949. In that time, it's fair to say that the entire world's opinion on aircraft had changed.