What’s Crossing Your Mind II

Its time to stop trying to force myself to fit into place that I am not meant to be. Or to try gaining the attention of people who clearly do not know, or care, that I exist.
 
I find it so odd how hard it is hitting me today. It has been weeks and it feels like it just happen hours ago. I know time heals all wounds but being I am living in the present that does not help me now. Thank goodness I don’t have an addictive personality or I would have fallen off the wagon days ago.
 
I’ve purposefully avoided responsibility for the largest part of my life. While I don’t have wife or children, I sincerely underestimated how significant the pull of being a son to seniors would be.

I’m paying for my sister and her family to come to the beach so that my parents can see their sole grandchild in new and fun environments. I’m redoing a bathroom with my dad because, even though he’s way too fucking old to be doing this, it’s his thing. I’m planning day trips for my mother because my dad is, like me, a complete homebody and my mom is craving new friends and experiences in her 70’s.

I hate it and love it.
 
This week I hit a huge low and felt extremely unappreciated by my family. I thought of everything I’ve sacrificed so my husband can have success in his career and my daughter can go to college with no financial stress. The one time I ask for help how I’m treated as a nuisance, a burden. And then I thought of my mom. Everything she’s done for me my whole life and how many times have I ignored or thought so little of her sacrifices. Children humble you. Elderly parents humble you. This week sucked but I’m glad it did.
 
This: “The opposite of loneliness, it’s not togetherness. It is intimacy.” ~Richard Bach
 
Anyone who says if you've seen one pair of boobs you've seen them all has clearly only ever seen one pair of boobs.
 
Anyone who says if you've seen one pair of boobs you've seen them all has clearly only ever seen one pair of boobs.

I always assumed the quote was, “If you’ve seen one pair of boobs then you want to see them all.” :D

How I am going to best initiate an argument with someone :D

Just be yourself. It’ll happen.
 
I had an thought earlier to maybe start writing but two things stop me.

Right now isn't the right time and also, I barely have any time to myself apart from at night when I just want to sleep.

It sucks because I lay there in bed at night and think "that would make a kick-arse story!"
 
I had an thought earlier to maybe start writing but two things stop me.

Right now isn't the right time and also, I barely have any time to myself apart from at night when I just want to sleep.

It sucks because I lay there in bed at night and think "that would make a kick-arse story!"
Voice record it when you have the thought and then write it up when you have more time
 
Voice record it when you have the thought and then write it up when you have more time

That is a very good idea. I'll have to remember to delete it after though. Knowing me, the police will arrest me for something unrelated and then find out they have a kinky git in cell 4.
 
Back
Top