What should I do?

[Doughboy48]

In a perfect world what her and I would decide is to have a fwb relationship. That is what I want and what I am trying to encourage but obviously not very well up to this point. Why it is so hard is because of the friend group her and I share. None of these people would be on board with us sleeping together and it would ruin every relationship her and I have with those people. I don’t want that at all but I also really want to sleep with this girl and I think that feeling is mutual. So that is the big hesitation in all of this. If this was some random girl at the gas station it would be a lot easier!

Why I didn’t encourage that last night was because there were probably 20-25 of those people sitting in the same area that would have all come down on us if they would have seen us doing that. She was not sitting on the couch with me, she was sitting right behind it on a desk chair so I could not really put my arm around her. When I said she was leaning over the couch what I meant was she was sitting in a chair behind it and leaned over the back of the couch. Basically her boobs would be at the top of the backrest and her arms hanging over where I was sitting while her lower body was sitting in the chair behind the couch. Not sure if that makes sense or not but hopefully it paints the picture correctly.

The other issue is I am twice her age, friends with her parents and she has told me multiple times she sees me as a bonus dad so the last thing I want to happen is her not want something and me blow these relationships up for no reason at all because now I am the creepy old guy that read more in to it than there was. She may see me as just that and nothing more and if so than I can just keep fantasizing about her in my brain but with the things she does it does not seem like she only sees me as her bonus dad. Maybe she sees me as her daddy and wants me to teach her how to be a slutty dirty girl.

Hopefully all this makes sense but if you have questions or I need to explain something better just let me know. I’ve tried to explain the situation the best I could but it is also hard without writing a book also.

 

[Britva415]

Well, I guess it all hinges on whether you can get her to meet you separately from a whole crowd of other people.

Do you think there's any way you can do that?

 

[Doughboy48]

Yes just trying to determine how to make that happen. There have been a couple times I think she made that happen and I blew the chance. Last summer when had left church on a Thursday evening she called me a minute later and said her car was making a noise and asked if I could look at it. We met back at the building and everyone else was gone so we were alone and her car was totally fine after I drove it and looked all over it. Then in December we were on a group trip and she had to stay back one day at the hotel to get some school done. When she was done she text my buddies wife and asked her if I would come pick her up at the hotel. When I got to the hotel I told her I would wait in my room to let me know when she was done. She just text me a couple minutes later she was in the lobby. I think she may have been on her period that trip or it may have played out differently. I had also brought her food back and I should have just went to her room instead of my own like an idiot.

I will be in the town she works at on Wednesday for work and my plan is to text her and ask if she wants coffee or something to eat. Not sure if it will work but I figure it is worth the shot to possibly get her alone.

 

[Britva415]

Get a hotel and make sure she knows it's standing ready!

Hell, just straight up ask her to go there with you.

 

[Doughboy48]

Have you not read any of the issues if she rejects that move?