When A Girl Wants Anal
- Thread starter Erlikkhan
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I think a critical distinction is whether the two of you have had anal sex before.
If not, then talking about it in a non-sexual context is almost certainly necessary. He's not likely to just start fucking your ass spontaneously, and calling out "Pleeeeeeeeease fuck my ass!" may scare him off.
If you HAVE had anal sex before, it should be a lot easier. In that case, blatantly asking (begging?) for it or demanding it will almost certainly work. Or stick your ass in the air and point it at him. Pulling your cheeks open could help. Or start fingering your ass (or his); that's a good sign you're interested in anal play. Any of the above would work on me!!
If not, then talking about it in a non-sexual context is almost certainly necessary. He's not likely to just start fucking your ass spontaneously, and calling out "Pleeeeeeeeease fuck my ass!" may scare him off.
If you HAVE had anal sex before, it should be a lot easier. In that case, blatantly asking (begging?) for it or demanding it will almost certainly work. Or stick your ass in the air and point it at him. Pulling your cheeks open could help. Or start fingering your ass (or his); that's a good sign you're interested in anal play. Any of the above would work on me!!
SexyGiggles
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DuckLover said:I think a critical distinction is whether the two of you have had anal sex before.
If not, then talking about it in a non-sexual context is almost certainly necessary. He's not likely to just start fucking your ass spontaneously, and calling out "Pleeeeeeeeease fuck my ass!" may scare him off.
If you HAVE had anal sex before, it should be a lot easier. In that case, blatantly asking (begging?) for it or demanding it will almost certainly work. Or stick your ass in the air and point it at him. Pulling your cheeks open could help. Or start fingering your ass (or his); that's a good sign you're interested in anal play. Any of the above would work on me!!
<pulls out paper> Must take notes....ask...beg...stick ass in air...hmmmmm....
Once you've clarified that you both like anal sex, then EITHER can take the initiative, using any of the above as clues...
(I don't mind him taking charge every so often....not TOO often of course, but I'll let him once or twice....)
ammre
ani and griselda's child
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i tlaked to my boyfriend once about doing it (i'm intrested he's not) he kinda has a good point about it but it's still intresting to try... His point is: "Why stick it in that hole when i have a perfectly good warm wet tight hole right next to it."
*sigh*
*sigh*
Lust Engine
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ammre said:
Man alive! Sounds like the old comparison of a mind to a parachute here. If it ain't open, it ain't workin'!
I guess if he's never tried it, he really can't speak as an authority figure on it but he does have the right to say no. You could always tell him the aforementioned hole can be wetter (lube lube lube!), MUCH MUCH tighter and ultimately gives you some astounding pleasure.
crazybbwgirl
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I dunno guys - I'd been with my lover about 6 months and I was wondering if he would EVER bring up anal (he's just so - um, polite?) But doggie style is his fav position, so one day when we were going at it I just said (well, ok screamed) please fuck my ass. Simple as that! Didn't have to ask twice - that's for sure!
SexyGiggles said:(I don't mind him taking charge every so often....not TOO often of course, but I'll let him once or twice....)
I hadn't really considered myself even remotely submissive before, nor was I planning on dating a pretty dominant woman! Guess I need to go spend more time on the BDSM board...
Though for the record, D/s can be fun to explore, building slowly into it, and switching on occasion.
Love ya, babe!
Okay, but what if all he seems to want is anal? Seems like every time we have sex, he tries to get me into anal. We were successful a couple of times, but a lot of the time, it just hurts. Sometimes because I'm just not aroused enough, sometimes not enough lube, sometimes I just want a quickie. But if I have to stop enjoying what I'm getting to tell him to take his finger out of my ass and get some more lube please, then I'm over even wanting it there. Hmm, I think I just answered my own question. Time to have a talk out of the bedroom before sex that if he wants anal he must, and I repeat MUST, arouse me to a feverish high and use a ton of lube before he even tries anything. Or else I just tie him down and take what I want!
crazybbwgirl
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hahaha - yeah - that'll teach him!
Noneyabizness
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Ramoana said:
Maybe he is just not interested....not all men like anal, just as not all women like anal....
I tried it once, and it just wasn't for me. Even after a good BM, I still felt like I had to have another one. For me, it just wasn't comfortable.
I've talked with a few guys that just weren't in to it either.
Good point!
Noneyabizness makes a good point-- as with all thing, sexual and non-, sometimes a person just isn't interested. (Either at the moment or in general.)
If you two have done it before and enjoyed it, then it's simply a matter of agreeing on cues, and respecting a "Not this time, honey..." if s/he says so.
If you haven't tried anal, than clear communication in a non-sexual environment is the key. You can make all the points you want about your interest, arousal, etc, but in the end your partner may still say, "That's not my bag, baby!" If that happens, you have to decide which is more important to you: anal sex or the relationship.
Sexual activity is a spectrum, and most of us on Lit are pretty far left. We occasionally forget that not everybody is. Each of us has a limit beyond which we won't go-- oral, anal, group, BD, D/s, SM. Part of what makes Lit so great is that we respect each other's interests and limits. Be sure you translate that respect into the real world too.
Noneyabizness said:
Noneyabizness makes a good point-- as with all thing, sexual and non-, sometimes a person just isn't interested. (Either at the moment or in general.)
If you two have done it before and enjoyed it, then it's simply a matter of agreeing on cues, and respecting a "Not this time, honey..." if s/he says so.
If you haven't tried anal, than clear communication in a non-sexual environment is the key. You can make all the points you want about your interest, arousal, etc, but in the end your partner may still say, "That's not my bag, baby!" If that happens, you have to decide which is more important to you: anal sex or the relationship.
Sexual activity is a spectrum, and most of us on Lit are pretty far left. We occasionally forget that not everybody is. Each of us has a limit beyond which we won't go-- oral, anal, group, BD, D/s, SM. Part of what makes Lit so great is that we respect each other's interests and limits. Be sure you translate that respect into the real world too.
ammre
ani and griselda's child
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Lust Engine said:Man alive! Sounds like the old comparison of a mind to a parachute here. If it ain't open, it ain't workin'!
I guess if he's never tried it, he really can't speak as an authority figure on it but he does have the right to say no. You could always tell him the aforementioned hole can be wetter (lube lube lube!), MUCH MUCH tighter and ultimately gives you some astounding pleasure.
No, we tried it. He still took that stance.
crazybbwgirl
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I had a b/f once who said it made him feel gay!?!?!? To each his own....
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