a question for masochists....

[dolf]

As for others, the other day when dolf was having problems she told me she needed to do her thing, and I told her that if she needed to to do it, just to be careful, and not do anything permanent or damaging. Telling her it was wrong or she shouldn't would have been wrong of me. First off, she knows what she's doing. But, frankly holding in that kind of pain in is way worse than a little itty bitty cut, or for that mattter bite. (I know, i'm paying with a stress related disorder. If I don't let it out on my skin, it will show up as an ulcer in my colon. Either way I'm in pain. ) She needed to let it out, or things were going to get worse, and I'd rather she have a cut on her foot than her wrist.

ty hon helps to have someone understand.

xx

 

[sunfox]

I said yes to self injuring.

I haven't done it in a while... since my kidlet was born, actually. But I've done things to hurt myself when I'm feeling overwhelmed for a very long time, and will probably always find that a comforting way to let off my stress.

I don't beat myself up about it.. I don't hate myself.. I just have trouble externalizing stress, and after a while, it builds up and I either cut to release the pain, or I blow up on everyone around me.

I have recently been feeling a bit of stress, enough that I've thought about cutting, but I haven't done it so far, and have been trying to simply gain the same comfort by talking to friends and C more openly. It has helped... but honestly, it's not the same for me, and chances are, I'll do it again eventually.

It's just a part of me, and who I am.

 

[bg23]

for me, the pain isn't about the sensation, so much as the control. the fact that my partner is able to inflict pain on me is a sign of his dominance, his control. it's this, more than anything, that makes the pain worth it, that enhances the experience. Thus, self caused pain does nothing for me. It has to be given to me, almost as a gift, from the one who dominates me.

 

[Marquis]

I think what a lot of people dont realize is one very important thing. You have to answer to no one but yourself in this life, and that there is no shame in being different or handling your life in a way that works for you. I dont think that the problem for most SIs is that you do it, its more being ashamed that you like it. For the most part i have come to accept that my feelings about pain and the way pain feels to me is different then it is for most and thats just the way it is. It took a long time for me to get where i am but now that i am here im a happy girl.

Just make sure you don't go too deep and I'll be happy too.

 

[LunarKitten]

as i see it there is a difference between destructive harm and enjoyable pain...even non-enjoyed pain can be good in a BDSM situation.

{trying to define and describe makes my head hurt, i'm sure you all know what i mean}

here's the thing...is masochism in sex play linked to self harm?


i'm being a wuss here and not commenting until i see what other people have to say on the matter.
xx

I clicked yes, in a kinky turn on way...I do tend to get excited during play and sex - struggles sometimes lead to bruises/marks where the rope was *shrugs* So I guess I do unintentionally hurt myself at times lol

 

[crazybbwgirl]

I have known about my penchant for pain for a long time. But have only been actively addressing the situation for less than a year now. I can take quite a lot of pain. And now it seems like I no longer even bruise from a play session! And there have been many times where I needed to ad pain during masturbation just to cum (especially if its been a long time since I've played with Sir). But I have never ever had the desire to self inflict pain for the sake of pain. And I would consider myself much more masochistic than submissive. So for me the answer is no.

 

[esclave_PP]

I am a masochist. My current new Master is a Sadist. I enjoy the pain/pleasure dichotomy. I do some self-inflicting when I need it but not to the point where it does me harm. Feeling the pain helps me, jolts me into awareness, and helps heal me too.

If you are hurting yourself badly, hang in there, get help if you need it, or if it is what you need, just be careful.

 

[catalina_francisco]

One of the things which occurs to me in discussing masochism and self harm is the terms of the relationship for those who are in one. I know in our relationship there is no chance he is going to tolerate myself self harming or giving myself pain on any level. It is not about him exerting his will, though there is that element there as well, but is more about my position as his slave and therefore his expectations I care for his property at all times and do not take the decision from him as to if and when, how or how much pain I will receive. It is not my right to do that which gives him so much pleasure to administer or withhold, nor to risk damaging what he sees as his. If I am in a place where I feel I need pain desperately, I am to tell him and let him decide whether he chooses to give it and whether he feels it is in my best interests.

Catalina

 

[robynwildchild]

god is a masochist

and we all hurt each other
drinking
smoking
driving fast
tattoos
piercings
i've been burned and broked a few bones
pain
is a challenge i see through

emotional
physical
and spiritual

 

[Esclava]

I SI when depressed and it is good.

Esclava