Absolution (closed)

[heartofcourage]

"I'm not ready." Valentina said to him softly. "As long as Mummy is still alive, I don't want to think about it."

 

[KieranSoares]

"No one expects you to be ready... Because no one else is ready to think about life after her either..." Warwick hugged her a little tighter. "Valentina... I think losing her is going to break me..." He rarely let on such troubles, but he knew she of all people would understand best

 

[heartofcourage]

“Papa always said that losing someone is like breaking a bone. It hurts but it will always get better.” Valentina said softly as Warwick confessed that losing Ashelin would be hard. “I don’t want her to go either. I want her to stay and be happy, but death is just what happens to all of us.”

 

[KieranSoares]

"Your father is a wise man, but sometimes one doesn't recover from a loss like that... I have no idea if I'll even be myself when she's gone. I'm already miserable now knowing she'll go." He sighed, being as open and honest as he could. But then he hugged Valentina closer. "You and the boys will be all I have left of her... The little habits and things you've picked up from her..."

 

[heartofcourage]

“Papa wants me to go live with him and Aunt Kitty.” Valentina said softly, knowing that the family they had together in the little cabin in the woods would soon be ending for good. “Will you go away forever when Mummy dies? Will I still get to see you?”

 

[KieranSoares]

"Not forever... But I already know I won't be able to stay," Warwick murmured. "But you get to choose where you go, love. We'd all like you to be comfortable among the rest of the Ghis family, but it's up to you."

 

[heartofcourage]

“Cole and Ciaran need you too.” Valentina reminded him softly. “About as much as me.”

 

[KieranSoares]

"I know, love," he murmured. "We'll figure it out... I don't know what will happen til she's gone... And I don't want to think about it."

 

[heartofcourage]

Valentina simply rested her head back on her Da's shoulder and let him continue to rock her next to the fire. If it brought him peace, she was glad to do it. It helped her to cope as well, as young as she was and scared about the entire situation.

 

[KieranSoares]

A few more days, and Ashelin began to decline quickly. She was entirely bedridden and her appetite was nonexistent. Warwick knew it was the beginning of the end, and so he kept Valentina and her brothers close, and welcomed Kitty to come anytime, at any hour she liked. And while Ashelin was a frail shell of her former self, she still maintained a grace and contentedness that eased her family in the knowledge that Vincenzo was keeping her entirely comfortable and she had made her peace.

It was early one morning that Valentina was gently woken from her bed by Vincenzo, knelt beside her. "Bambina," he whispered softly, his gaze sad but calm.

 

[heartofcourage]

Valentina woke with a start, the little girl exhausted from keeping vigil with the rest of the family. She looked at Vincenzo as he looked at her with a sadness she had only seen a few times before.

“Is she gone?” Valentina asked softly, knowing in her heart that Ashelin was finally dead.

 

[KieranSoares]

"She's gone," Vincenzo confirmed softly. The night before, Ashelin had sent everyone to bed, even as she was barely able to stay awake and speak, knowing they were all short of sleep because of her. Warwick was the only one who remained, Vincenzo checking in every so often.

"She went in.her sleep," Vincenzo assured Valentina softly. "Warwick right beside her. She was happy as could be, right up to the end."

 

[heartofcourage]

Valentina didn’t say anything else as she crawled into her father’s arms and held him tightly, crying against his shoulder as she mourned the woman who had practically raised her since she was an infant.

 

[KieranSoares]

Vincenzo didn't make her move much, curling up with her in her bed for a long while. He didn't need to say anything else. He'd prepared Valentina as best her could, given all the advice, and now all he could offer was comfort and an ear to listen.

 

[heartofcourage]

Kitty had come as soon as she had heard the news, wanting to be there to comfort the boys, Valentina, and Warwick. She made sure the boys were fed and then sent them back off to bed, everyone exhausted from the long days that had been happening recently. Then, she and Warwick got to work preparing Ashelin for her burial.

“You know I’lol take care of all of them. I’ll use the treasury to support all three until they can stand on their own two feet.” Kitty said softly after they had gotten Ashelin laid out and freshly dressed. “I owe it to Marius as much as to you and Ashelin.”

 

[KieranSoares]

"Cole and Ciaran are alright, but they'll appreciate some extra support," Warwick murmured, having barely said anything that day as he seemed to go along like a husk of his former self. "Working among the keep guard has them set for the most part... But I won't leave until Valentina is ready for me to go."

 

[heartofcourage]

“You don’t have to leave at all, Warwick. You know that.” Kitty said softly as she gently took his hand and squeezed it.

 

[KieranSoares]

"I can't stay," he murmured as he stopped, his eyes still on his late wife's peaceful expression. "... Everything has a memory... Everyone knew her... It's only going to get worse. And all the sympathy and pity... I don't want it... I'd rather go someplace where I can just focus on my work and make my peace in time..."

 

[heartofcourage]

“You can’t hide forever. One day something will happen with one of these children and they will need you.” Kitty said softly as he seemed to just want to run away as quickly as possible. “And she would want you to come back.”

 

[KieranSoares]

"I will never abandon my children, Kitty. If they need me, no force on Earth would stop me," he told her quietly, his gaze turning to her over his half-moon glasses. "But I know where Valentina needs to be, even if it takes her a while to get comfortable at the keep. And the boys... Ciaran's already planning a cabin of his own, insisting Cole should have this one. I will always be in reach... Once Valentina is settled, of course."

 

[heartofcourage]

"We will all band together for her." Kitty said softly as she saw the anguish on Warwick's face. "I'm so sorry for all of this, Warwick. I wish sometimes that I could have traded places with her."

 

[KieranSoares]

"Don't be sorry, dear... And don't think you were worth less than Ashelin. She loved you like a sister and you loved her. That's all she needed... She was happy. That's what matters, no matter how miserable we feel at her passing... Knowing she went without pain or regret... It does make things a little more bearable."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Because you made her happy, Warwick. When I first came to Inverness, she was my first friend. Through everything, she saw the value in love. She encouraged me to find love. I encouraged her to tell you how she felt." Kitty said softly. "I don't know what I'm going to do without her, to be honest. Without her, my children wouldn't have survived."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I wonder if she was here to see us all through..." Warwick murmured, looking back down at Ashelin's face. "And now that we're all on the right track... Whoever's in charge decided to take her back... Like an angel. Maybe someone somewhere else needs her now." Warwick wasn't a religious man, but he was looking for some kind of logical reasoning that the love of his life had been taken so young, forced to leave behind two sons just finding their way in the world, and a daughter who shouldn't have had any worries except for learning new things.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Wherever she goes, she'll be waiting for you. She loved you beyond reason sometimes." Kitty said softly, knowing that Warwick was truly Ashelin's soulmate. "It'll be hard. We'll all miss her deeply, but we can't hide away completely. She would be so upset if that happened."