Angelic Thoughts...Devilish Surprises - DA's Inspirational Journal

[The_gladiator]

"You might be right, it is still weird that I got so much sleep and am tired and unmotivated when I dot very little the night before and was awake and motivated. seems backwards..."

 

[darkangel76]

"It happens sometimes," she says, resting against him a little. "I think it tends to happen when we just have a lot going on at once." A hand moves to stroke his arm. "When things seem a bit more overwhelming than usual." She turns her head and looks up at him, giving him a warm smile.

 

[The_gladiator]

he nods smiling back down at her. She is always so affectionate, something he loves. "I guess I have to do laundry tomorrow since I didn't do it tonight." he says with a laugh at himself.

 

[darkangel76]

A soft giggle escapes her. "Tomorrow indeed," she says while continuing to stroke his arm. "But that's all right. At least you know it'll get done then. Yes?" She nods reassuringly, nuzzling up against him. "That's what matters." She sighs softly. "I have to do some laundry tomorrow too." She giggles a bit more at her own words.

 

[The_gladiator]

He nods, "Yeah, I know it will get done I'm almost out of clean underwear..." he laughs more.

"You do? do you want to come do mine too?" he teases.

 

[darkangel76]

Her giggles turn into laughter as she rests against him. "Silly," she mutters teasingly. "And yes, I do." She then playfully pokes him for his one comment about doing his laundry for him.

 

[The_gladiator]

"Oh come on please, what if I asked nicely?" he is chuckling more now. "What, isn't that when you do laundry? when you're out of underwear? Or is that just a guy thing? Hey... at least I do my own laundry a lot of guys don't."

 

[darkangel76]

She giggles a bit more, her face red both from blushing as well as from the laughter. "Hrmm.... And I have a lot of... underthings," she admits. "It would take me quite a bit before I ran out." Her cheeks turn a deep shade of scarlet. "And I'll give you points for the fact that you do your own. That is a good thing indeed," she says with a smile.

 

[darkangel76]

Music has been feeding her soul as of late. Her eclectic tastes quenching and quelling that knotted ache burning deeply in the pit of her tummy. Yes. She might be home, but the stresses present are ever rising and, at times, feel like they might be consuming her whole. It's been vicious at times, down right exhausting. But... she presses on. Mucking through the storms that come her way and trying desperately to come out unscathed on the other side. She knows somehow things will turn out the way they are supposed to. However, that doesn't make the journey any less frightening or worrisome.

As these thoughts swirl through the darkest recesses of her mind, she sits on her plush couch. Her blue eyes spy the blanket she's known to snuggle and immediately a delicate hand reaches for it, grabbing it and pulling it to her slender body, wrapping it about herself so that she can curl up and cuddle with it while sipping some tea. Settling a bit more into her seat, she tries to relax and let the music haunting the air fill her thoughts and mind. She lets out a soft sigh, a finger reaching up to twirl itself about her brownish red curls. Yes. Time to relax. Time to unwind. Time to just sink into the worlds that are 'escape'.

 

[darkangel76]

She flops down on her couch, her mind wandering due to the all the crazy that has befallen her as of late--in her daily life, with friends, elsewhere. It's consumed much of her time, but such is the way of life. Her muse has also been fickle as a result. Only wanting to play and peek her head out in certain instances, if at all. It's been frustrating for her to say the least. So, for now, she continues to feed her soul with music and to surround herself with those who care. Hopefully, soon, she'll come out of the storm that is chaos and be able to resume the normal loves and outlets she holds so dear. But until then... these storms must be weathered. She just hopes people can bear with her while she does.

Snuggling up on her couch, she reaches for her unsweet tea. As she sips the contents down, she listens to some music, feeding her soul, strengthening it while stresses and other things continue to parade their way through her life. As she listens, she smiles. Yes, soon... soon... before she knows it, she knows things will settle. She just has to hold onto that knowledge. And hold on... she will.

 

[darkangel76]

She snuggles on her couch, her knuckles turning white as she clutches at her blanket. It's been a trying time emotionally. But then, who likes to worry? However, it's her way... how she is.

Life is full of worry--worry concerning where things will be for herself as well as for those she cares about. It's an endless cycle, one that mercilessly repeats and forces you to go round and round, not once letting you off as the one who created the path looks down with an evil grin showing its sharpest of teeth. You can almost feel them gnashing and gnawing at your flesh like razors just before they sink down and take that bite... your blood slowly oozing from your body and draining you as you give of yourself. So you hope that the trip around the path slows down... halt for a moment so that everyone around you will be all right as you hand them your heart, the one piece that those teeth will never bite down or cleave. It's a struggle. It is. And it's one that'll be won. It must be won...

And so she continues to snuggle underneath the warm comfort of her blanket. Her cup of hot tea steaming on the end table next to her. Her blue eyes shift toward it for a moment and she smiles longingly. Yes, yes. At least there are some comforts in this world... even if they are small ones.

 

[darkangel76]

She curls up in her blanket feeling a bit disturbed so she drinks her tea and listens to some music to help soothe her soul. As she sits there on her couch she knows she'll have to work on the wording of some of her posts...

 

[darkangel76]

She's come to realize that there are those out there that are better left to their own devices. So be it. She won't make the same blunders again. Thank goodness there are those out there that are in agreement and are willing to provide comfort and lend a listening ear. It definitely helped to brighten the dark clouds that began to loom and rumble with thunder. The lightning is still crashing and the taste is still bitter... but those will ebb and subside with time, thankfully. But for now, she shall take solace in the comforts of her couch and blanket as well as her tea. And while she does, she'll be grateful for those who understand and are there and hold on to the fact that time truly will heal all.

 

[darkangel76]

Times have indeed been busy and full of firsts... amongst the stresses and sorrows endured, some happy times have also been occurring. In the land of 'daily life', her first born has started public school. A large step to say the least, as well as a rewarding one. The transition has been smooth, but the schedule has been hectic in adjusting. It's amazing watching a little one do so well, talk so excitedly and even make mentions of a little girlfriend. Other firsts have occurred with this first born as he grows and becomes more aware, his intelligence shining through at staggering levels. Teeth loosening, signs of his growth, that he isn't 'little' any longer. And then the other little one... firsts for her as she gets her teeth professionally cared for, prepares for the resuming of dance and the preparation of her first time away for a full morning of preschool. The eagerness is there and she is ready to learn. So many firsts. So busy...

And now, 'daily life' is being consumed by the visits of family as they help us through a semi-difficult time. One causing great stress as we face a new chapter caused by those who wish harm upon those who do not rightly deserve it. Fortunately, there's a plan. Fortunately, those they seek to harm know the agenda and are 'ready' and are doing what they can to overcome the obstacles. It will be stressful and continue to be so. But there will be triumph and we will rise up from it all, coming out better, stronger, brighter.

But for the upcoming week, time must be spent predominantly with family while they visit. While they help us do a few things and spend time with us and grandchildren. Time on shall be missed, but such is the way sometimes...

 

[The_gladiator]

a return...he has always come and gone from these halls, this place that is lit. It is typically not his choice that he leaves, but it is the real world, that cruel mistress that draws him away always. However he always seems to find his way back, to where on lit he returns depends on the time in his life, but he always returns. He returns now and stands in this library, stairing down at pages he has not written to in so long and he bites his lip fighting the wealth of emotions. He knows that even now he should not be here, he has real world commitments he should be at but he could not resist the allure, the nostalgia of what was and what he wishes would be again. He hopes things will go back to normal in time that he can write again. He does not look up seeking the sweet one who inhabits these halls, he would sense her presense. He knows that she will know he visited though, for he had turned the pages, looked at their shared words. Sadness fills him. He is just so tired... so so tired...

 

[darkangel76]

Though she has a few things going on in her daily life that are hindering her at the moment, she takes a second to meander the rooms of her 'home'. As she enters her library, she feels his presence... though, she can see that he's not there. It's merely that lingering essence of what was, an impression of him after he'd come and gone. Breathing deeply, she knows he's been there, visiting, perusing... she senses his sadness, the heaviness he holds in his heart, the troubles in his mind. Opening the pages of their stories, she leaves him roses--one for each story they have together--so that he will find them when next he decides to open them. As she closes the pages--though she knows it's only for a brief time, they will be opened again, written in once more--a few warm tears well in her blue eyes. Delicate fingers stroke the bindings of the books as she lovingly places them on the shelves. "You are not forgotten," she whispers. "I will never forget..." As she walks away, her scent lingers in the air as it does on the pages. Her words a whisper on the wind.

 

[The_gladiator]

He knows she knew he visited. He can sense her sadness and her whispered words reach him. Tears fill his own eyes he is so overwhelmed right now and knowing that he has people who care for him and believe in him is more than touching. He sits in the library his head in his hands... he is making progress, though not as much as he needs to to make his deadlines. He clenches his fist, failure is not an option, even if his depression is sabotaging him, he won't give up. not yet...

 

[darkangel76]

She sees him sitting on the plush couch, head in his hands. His emotions are strong, fierce as they course through his veins with every pulse of his beating heart. The air is thick with palpable tension so overwhelming she can feel the weight of it almost instantly strike her chest, ripping and clawing at her heart. Standing there, she feels the beckoning tug luring her forward. Slowly, she begins to move, taking tiny steps toward the shadowy form that is all too familiar as he sits there, head bowed while he struggles inwardly. Standing behind him, she leans forward, her lips then brush against his ear, "I believe in you," she whispers. "Always." Gently, she presses her lips against cheek, giving him a tender kiss. "You will not fail. I know that you won't." A small smile plays on her lips and she gives him another kiss upon his cheek, a hand coming to rest upon his shoulder--a reminder that she is there, that she thinks of him, that she hopes for him... always.

 

[darkangel76]

A glimpse into her daily life outside of what goes on in this room when she meanders and writes..........

She is a wife and mother and has been dealing with a hectic, nonstop schedule that comes with kids that are growing up and entering school. They say you have more time when kids enter school, but that is far from the truth of things. You have to chauffeur them here and there, help them with homework, make sure they are learning--both academically and socially, get them involved in extracurricular activities, allow them play time (and, of course, they will have their own opinions on this matter and more often than not require MUCH prep time and MUCH clean up time). It runs you ragged, though it's all worth it. But alas, you do not have this mysterious time that people claim you will suddenly have. I dare say, you have less. Much, much less.

Top that off with other struggles, stresses and nonsense and you have chaotic calamity. But, somehow you juggle things. Barely. It means there are times you get angry, times when you cry, times when you wish people would be there for you... But, in the end, you muddle through and are just there with your family--your SO, your kids. You stay strong and supportive for them and are grateful to have them because no one could ever replace them, not ever!

That said, so much going on. My kids have schedules that run me ragged at times though I'm beyond proud of both of them as I watch them slowly develop into these little people with such distinctive personalities. They have interests and tastes that are unique to them and I love them for it. My daughter... the artistic dancer at the tender age of 3. My son... the insanely brainy boy who has a penchant for science and horror and all at the age of 5. And then there's the man, my Sir, who without him these two wouldn't exist... I love him deeply and will support him unconditionally. He and I have been tested so many times and each time we've come out on top. It lets me know that the vows we took truly meant something. And now, as outside forces try to make our lives difficult and add to our stress, we will again pull together, face the obstacle and come out on top.

Yes, we have each other... our family. Our life may be hectic and bring me frustrations and stress among other things. But ultimately, when I take a step back... I know I'm grateful for those in my family. A Sir who loves me unconditionally, who provides for me... two beautiful children who will go far one day...

Just have to keep perspective... no matter how insanely difficult and hectic life gets.

 

[darkangel76]

Funny how a pet means almost as much to you as your kids and SO. They truly are a part of your family. So, when something goes wrong... when they go missing... your insides go cold and you find yourself wracked with sobs. I truly hope my cat is all right and somehow finds his way home... four days missing is far too long... *cries*

 

[darkangel76]

My cat was found last night... finally. Due to my being proactive by posting fliers, notices, walking the neighborhood and talking to people, etc... he was found. A few blocks away, a neighbor saw him in her backyard and contacted me. As such, I was able to pick up and leave and go get him straight away. He's now with me... no words for how ecstatic we all are to have him back... He seems to be both in good health and good spirits too. Honestly, I couldn't be happier or more fortunate in regards to him. I'm just so happy to have him back. With all the awful and stressful going on... I needed this bit of happiness. I'm just glad he's back home where he belongs so he can be loved and safe. We missed him and yes... we needed him.

 

[darkangel76]

Brought my cat to the vet today just to be on the safe side. The vet said he looked great and after giving him a thorough check up, said he was in very good health for his age. He had blood work done and that came back great. He also had a urinalysis done and that came back normal as well. So, all in all... my little 'baby' is healthy and perfect! They gave him all his vaccines and did prescribe him some flea meds--to be safe--and recommended he have a dental cleaning. So, I will be going back for that. But YAY! My cat is healthy and safe and in perfect condition. I'm just so glad of this... I needed this... I really did. I still have so many other things going on that are beyond stressful right now... but this bit of happiness was something I needed so sorely. And to have my cat back... yeah, I'm glad this was one of the things that I was fortunate enough to have granted in my favor.

 

[darkangel76]

Brought my cat back to the vet for a follow up visit. He had his teeth cleaned and I got him shampoo'd (for obvious reasons seeing as he's been outside for so long). But, I also got him microchipped for safety reasons. All in all, I feel really good about all that I've done by my cat since his return. He's happy and healthy and as safe as I can possibly make him. It's definitely helped to ease my mind a bit as well and goodness knows I need it these days....

Life is still crazy. Crazy schedule with the kids. Stress with a few factors concerning hubs' job. However, I'm trying my best and that is all one can do really. At least I get to write it out, which helps to a degree and I have a couple creative outlets--creative writing and reading--which help me muck through it depending on my mood and such. Anyway, here's to trying and here's to hoping things relent so that I can relax at least a little bit.

 

[darkangel76]

So, today started off somewhat decently. I had a few positives going for me, which had me kind of smiling--something I've sorely needed as of late given some things. I'd finally felt happy despite the chaos and then it was ripped away due to thoughtless behavior that left me feeling pretty badly about myself. Not sure if those involved truly get I'm feeling this way or if they'd truly care because they either think I should just suck it up in general or because they think I should get over it because it was a joke. But for me, regardless of any of that... an insecurity was targeted and that is just something you don't do to someone you're supposedly friends with. The moment you realize that person is uncomfortable or hurting, that is when you should check yourself. But, I don't know... maybe that is too much to ask sometimes or maybe some people are just exceptions to that rule. Whatever the case, I know how I feel right now... and it isn't very nice. In fact, I feel rather alone...

 

[darkangel76]

Summer is still trying to hang on, which makes me pout. But I do know that Fall is lingering just around the corner. All too soon I know I'll be able to feel that wonderful crispness in the air and smell the glorious fragrance of Autumn leaves and other such delicious spicy scents that somehow permeate the air this time of year. They are waiting. I know it. I just have to be patient. October--my favorite month--is only two days away and that means my favorite holiday is nearly here as well. Halloween. Being a bit of a costume nut, I do own a handful and am thus contemplating which one should come out and be the one I don this year. I'm debating between Alice (my absolute all time favorite and the one I tend to go to most of the time) or Red Riding Hood. I adore both immensely as I adore all my costumes. But for some reason, those are the two I'm really wanting to wear this year for reasons unknown. Anyway, I cannot wait for October and all the fun festivities that come along with it--pumpkin pie, candy (cannot forget the yummy Halloween candy, especially candy corn!), costumes, the colors, horror movies, the haunting decorations and yes... the weather! I love colder weather and am so ready for it to come at me! Bring it on Fall, this girl is ready and she is waiting!