Annoncing my poem! You jey!

[Tathagata]

teh smart chix r hawt

 

[Sara Crewe]

teh smart chix r hawt

There better not be any smart chicks around here. That will totally upset the ducks. (if the Vizier hasn't eaten them)

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Nymphs are always watching. We are the big brothers of the forest.

Now, see, I thought you said that as vizier you didn't have any bounds and that you were evil and unprincipled? I accept your apology with the same amount of sincerity which you expressed in your heart-wrenching plea for impunity. Oh, and fyi, I gave away the king and queen's holdings to the witty and brilliant poet. I thought an offer of two contributors copies would be seen as a slap in the face. I moved all my holdings into escrow accounts years ago. I just mooch off the castle now and then when the weather is bad in Caymans.


Oh, dear, you're still struggling with identity crisis huh? Even after all this years in therapy... Why, you are your own vizier, my dear. I have been telling you that for years. Don't let anyone try to wipe away your malignant soul. You have earned it.

I visit you all the time but alas you are always asleep. I should really ease off on the bedtime drugs in your wine, I guess.

Okay, let me check my palm pilot...I can slot you on for a 4:00 meeting behind the throne. So, I should mark that down as 30 minutes of evil suggestions?

Can't seem to wake up today. Something about that wine... I didn't THINK I was drinking that much...

You speak correctly; evil grand viziers belong only to themselves. But we need someone else's face to go on the effigies while we quietly leave town.

The whole therapist thing... after I defenestrated the first couple, everyone you've hired for me has been so... tentative... And none of them demonstrates any real understanding of True Evil.

4 is no good for me. I have a couple of droigt de seigneur duties to attend to. Can we make it 3:45? I can whisper pretty efficiently.

Good thing I already have a very deep secret alliance with the poet in question. Just in case...

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Can't seem to wake up today. Something about that wine... I didn't THINK I was drinking that much...

You speak correctly; evil grand viziers belong only to themselves. But we need someone else's face to go on the effigies while we quietly leave town.

The whole therapist thing... after I defenestrated the first couple, everyone you've hired for me has been so... tentative... And none of them demonstrates any real understanding of True Evil.

4 is no good for me. I have a couple of droigt de seigneur duties to attend to. Can we make it 3:45? I can whisper pretty efficiently.

Good thing I already have a very deep secret alliance with the poet in question. Just in case...

bijou

I think maybe we need to look from the Forest Gumpian school of thought for your next therapist. Perhaps then we could come to some kind of agreement that you will stop poisoning all the boxes of chocolates and we will agree to put up that life sized poster of your malevolent mugshot. What do you think of "Evil is as Evil Does" as your catch phrase?

3:45 it is but you must come bearing small boxes that contain big jewels to compensate for my inconvenience.


I do sense your deep and secret alliance with the poet in question. Sometimes when I speak to you I feel like I am speaking to that poet.



*cue twilight zone music and cut to a stack of mash potatoes in the foreground*

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I think maybe we need to look from the Forest Gumpian school of thought for your next therapist. Perhaps then we could come to some kind of agreement that you will stop poisoning all the boxes of chocolates and we will agree to put up that life sized poster of your malevolent mugshot. What do you think of "Evil is as Evil Does" as your catch phrase?

3:45 it is but you must come bearing small boxes that contain big jewels to compensate for my inconvenience.


I do sense your deep and secret alliance with the poet in question. Sometimes when I speak to you I feel like I am speaking to that poet.



*cue twilight zone music and cut to a stack of mash potatoes in the foreground*

You flatter me beyond words. If I could write parodies like that, I'd insist on being worshiped as a god.

In the meantime, though, I'll settle for the giant poster, and the slogan is excellent. I've always had a deep compulsion to bitch slap Forrest Gump, so I just don't think that's the way to go. Nurse Rached might be able to do something for me; I think we'd understand each other. Or possibly Frau Blucher (did I just hear an alarmed sound from BlackShanglan?).

The dark semisweet is safe. I never poison that.

And I have a ruby the size of a pigeon's egg. Or is that a pigeon's egg the size of a ruby? (muttering, rummaging through large trunks full of torture equipment and lingerie) *squish* eww. Guess it was the latter.

How bout the jewel-encrusted femur of St. Fidgeta, patron saint of unruly children?

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

You flatter me beyond words. If I could write parodies like that, I'd insist on being worshiped as a god.

In the meantime, though, I'll settle for the giant poster, and the slogan is excellent. I've always had a deep compulsion to bitch slap Forrest Gump, so I just don't think that's the way to go. Nurse Rached might be able to do something for me; I think we'd understand each other. Or possibly Frau Blucher (did I just hear an alarmed sound from BlackShanglan?).

The dark semisweet is safe. I never poison that.

And I have a ruby the size of a pigeon's egg. Or is that a pigeon's egg the size of a ruby? (muttering, rummaging through large trunks full of torture equipment and lingerie) *squish* eww. Guess it was the latter.

How bout the jewel-encrusted femur of St. Fidgeta, patron saint of unruly children?

bijou

God-Vizier...is there really such a wide gap?

Now you have gone and endeared yourself to me. I have always wished that Forrest would have just kept running. You may bitch slap him if he ends up running your way anytime soon. I have decided you will remain faceless in my mind. I have decided your brain is gigantic enough that it does need the added trim of features. Speaking of gigantic brains, that horsie scares the hell outta me in a I-wish-he-was-my-friend-but-I'm-sure he-doesn't-talk to nymphs kinda way.


Okay, leave the dark with almonds alone too, please.

I refuse to comment on the offer of your jewel-encrusted bone and the not so subtle inference that I am an unruly child.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

God-Vizier...is there really such a wide gap?

Now you have gone and endeared yourself to me. I have always wished that Forrest would have just kept running. You may bitch slap him if he ends up running your way anytime soon. I have decided you will remain faceless in my mind. I have decided your brain is gigantic enough that it does need the added trim of features. Speaking of gigantic brains, that horsie scares the hell outta me in a I-wish-he-was-my-friend-but-I'm-sure he-doesn't-talk to nymphs kinda way.


Okay, leave the dark with almonds alone too, please.

I refuse to comment on the offer of your jewel-encrusted bone and the not so subtle inference that I am an unruly child.

God thinks he's the Grand Vizier, and grand viziers think they're god, so I suspect you're right.

Dark with almonds counts as dark. And almonds have that lovely taste of cyanide...

I keep trying to leave work and go home but you people keep showing up and being brilliant all over the place and so now I'm soooo late. But what is there at home, really, but damp fireworks and a house that needs to be cleaned.

Fidgeta's my favorite saint, and hey, some of my best friends are unruly children. You're the one running around in the woods, anyway... and refusing to sit properly on that throne... don't slouch, dear. And your habit of turning upside down and hanging your legs over the back is making the peasants nervous.

How bout the Cursed Topaz Eye of Yogsoggoth, stolen from the Temple of Al-Krowli when I was there on a diplomatic mission? It's nice, and aside from a slight tendency to hover disconcertingly a few inches above the table, it's PERFECTLY harmless.

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

God thinks he's the Grand Vizier, and grand viziers think they're god, so I suspect you're right.

Dark with almonds counts as dark. And almonds have that lovely taste of cyanide...

I keep trying to leave work and go home but you people keep showing up and being brilliant all over the place and so now I'm soooo late. But what is there at home, really, but damp fireworks and a house that needs to be cleaned.

Fidgeta's my favorite saint, and hey, some of my best friends are unruly children. You're the one running around in the woods, anyway... and refusing to sit properly on that throne... don't slouch, dear. And your habit of turning upside down and hanging your legs over the back is making the peasants nervous.

How bout the Cursed Topaz Eye of Yogsoggoth, stolen from the Temple of Al-Krowli when I was there on a diplomatic mission? It's nice, and aside from a slight tendency to hover disconcertingly a few inches above the table, it's PERFECTLY harmless.

bijou

This is one of those tree falling in the forest questions. If one is truly a vizier than can one be late? A vizier definitely cannot be expected to deal with soggy fireworks or the mundane task of cleaning. Now use your evil nature to think of a perfectly plausible lie to cover for why you are late. I would not lead with, "I was talking to a nymph" but that's just me.

Alright, alright...I admit it. I am hopelessly immature. Sitting still hurts my bones and sitting upright hurts my brain. I believe both might be against my religion.

Is diplomatic mission a euphemism for total annihilation? A topaz! One of my favourites! You have won your way back into my good graces. If however, said topaz floats away with me or from me you will of course, have to replace it with two of the same colour and size and save me if I require saving. Prime castle interest is a bitch these days. Or am I the bitch? Ah, well, does it really matter...

 

[Tathagata]

I refuse to comment on the offer of your jewel-encrusted bone and the not so subtle inference that I am an unruly child.

you said " bone"

~snortchucklechortle~

ah the simple pleasures of life

 

[unpredictablebijou]

This is one of those tree falling in the forest questions. If one is truly a vizier than can one be late? A vizier definitely cannot be expected to deal with soggy fireworks or the mundane task of cleaning. Now use your evil nature to think of a perfectly plausible lie to cover for why you are late. I would not lead with, "I was talking to a nymph" but that's just me.

Alright, alright...I admit it. I am hopelessly immature. Sitting still hurts my bones and sitting upright hurts my brain. I believe both might be against my religion.

Is diplomatic mission a euphemism for total annihilation? A topaz! One of my favourites! You have won your way back into my good graces. If however, said topaz floats away with me or from me you will of course, have to replace it with two of the same colour and size and save me if I require saving. Prime castle interest is a bitch these days. Or am I the bitch? Ah, well, does it really matter...

Actually no one in my household would be the least bit surprised by "I was talking to a nymph." That's far less batshit crazy than a lot of what I tell them... I must be the vizier there too cause they were busy cleaning the house when I got there... or maybe it's that "bitch" thing. I think the word's overused, personally. All these women going round announcing what bitches they are. Last I checked, big dogs don't bark. Besides, if everyone's been warned over and over about what a bitch you are, how can you take them by surprise with your sudden revelations of True Evil?

I bet you're not a bitch, not really. I bet you simply have the perfectly justifiable expectations of any true goddess nymph. And perfectly reasonable responses when those expectations aren't met. Telling someone you'd turn them into a toad if it weren't already the case is just good, straightforward communication. If people aren't interested in the truth, wellllll...

As to the topaz, you've noticed by now that it's an imperial, that nice rare shade of aroused-nipple pink you like so much. As to its disconcerting habit of whispering your name over and over during the hours after midnight, well, that just means it likes you. If it floats away with you, I'll just summon my flying monkeys and come get you both. But you might not want to come back.

I have some interesting ideas about raising funds to support the castle's double mortgage, and to support us in the lifestyle to which we've become accustomed... Should I discuss them with you or the poet?

Think the monkey would wear a funny little hat?

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Actually no one in my household would be the least bit surprised by "I was talking to a nymph." That's far less batshit crazy than a lot of what I tell them... I must be the vizier there too cause they were busy cleaning the house when I got there... or maybe it's that "bitch" thing. I think the word's overused, personally. All these women going round announcing what bitches they are. Last I checked, big dogs don't bark. Besides, if everyone's been warned over and over about what a bitch you are, how can you take them by surprise with your sudden revelations of True Evil?

I bet you're not a bitch, not really. I bet you simply have the perfectly justifiable expectations of any true goddess nymph. And perfectly reasonable responses when those expectations aren't met. Telling someone you'd turn them into a toad if it weren't already the case is just good, straightforward communication. If people aren't interested in the truth, wellllll...

As to the topaz, you've noticed by now that it's an imperial, that nice rare shade of aroused-nipple pink you like so much. As to its disconcerting habit of whispering your name over and over during the hours after midnight, well, that just means it likes you. If it floats away with you, I'll just summon my flying monkeys and come get you both. But you might not want to come back.

I have some interesting ideas about raising funds to support the castle's double mortgage, and to support us in the lifestyle to which we've become accustomed... Should I discuss them with you or the poet?

Think the monkey would wear a funny little hat?

bijou

I am actually not a bitch but I play one on TV. It's true, in reality I am not called a bitch. People do however comment quite often on the intelligence of my rear end . That comment is of course, completely unfounded.

I have never had my love and admiration returned by my jewelry. It's a novelty I can live with...although, I am a tad concerned with this talk of flying monkeys. Perhaps you are not really a vizier but the wicked witch of the west in disguise. I hope you don't mind if I toss a bucket of water on you.

Oh dear. I thought the king paid the castle off years ago. His gambling problem must have gotten out of hand again. I am all for being supported in any way so let's do lunch as soon as possible. Why don't you send me some possible dates? And sure, send them to yourself as well if you a need a reminder.

I bet the monkey would wear a Redsox hat. Oh wait, let's make his head explode and get him an autographed Yankees hat. You give it to him though...I'll watch from the tower.

 

[Tzara]

...People do however comment quite often on the intelligence of my rear end...

Uh. Uh.

Uh....

Well, it's a very smart rear end, you know. Very smart.

Smart.

Delightful, even.

I, uh, am very fond of it. Very fond.

Very.

 

[Angeline]

I am actually not a bitch but I play one on TV. It's true, in reality I am not called a bitch. People do however comment quite often on the intelligence of my rear end . That comment is of course, completely unfounded.

I have never had my love and admiration returned by my jewelry. It's a novelty I can live with...although, I am a tad concerned with this talk of flying monkeys. Perhaps you are not really a vizier but the wicked witch of the west in disguise. I hope you don't mind if I toss a bucket of water on you.

Oh dear. I thought the king paid the castle off years ago. His gambling problem must have gotten out of hand again. I am all for being supported in any way so let's do lunch as soon as possible. Why don't you send me some possible dates? And sure, send them to yourself as well if you a need a reminder.

I bet the monkey would wear a Redsox hat. Oh wait, let's make his head explode and get him an autographed Yankees hat. You give it to him though...I'll watch from the tower.

The monkey already has a Red Sox hat. I saw him sporting one in a recent av. I don't think he'd mind getting the autographed Yankees cap though. He'd just turn around and sell it on e-bay so he could buy Red Sox tickets.

However to be on the safe side I'll meet you for a Campari and soda in another country while the hand-off takes place.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Uh. Uh.

Uh....

Well, it's a very smart rear end, you know. Very smart.

Smart.

Delightful, even.

I, uh, am very fond of it. Very fond.

Very.

It is quite brilliant. I agree.

Well well Tzara! Him and the horse boy, I thought those two were among those WAY too classy to hang around a thread like this. Then again, Sara, with the quality of your work, I don't know what you're doing slumming in here either.

Let's just say the king has some very -ahem- unique tastes in mistresses. Procurement, one of the many tasks of the vizier, has been expensive. And then there are my various fees for staying quiet about his predilections. It adds up.

Toss all the water you want. I'll cross the running version too, if you like. All that's a myth anyway.

The monkey's a Sox fan?
I may have to go a little easier on him.

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

It is quite brilliant. I agree.

Well well Tzara! Him and the horse boy, I thought those two were among those WAY too classy to hang around a thread like this. Then again, Sara, with the quality of your work, I don't know what you're doing slumming in here either.

Let's just say the king has some very -ahem- unique tastes in mistresses. Procurement, one of the many tasks of the vizier, has been expensive. And then there are my various fees for staying quiet about his predilections. It adds up.

Toss all the water you want. I'll cross the running version too, if you like. All that's a myth anyway.

The monkey's a Sox fan?
I may have to go a little easier on him.

bijou

Brilliant huh? Must be that glow in the dark tanning lotion.

Tzara is omnipresent and uber intelligent. He is so eloquent that his words seem to stay with me and speak to me even when I am talking to someone else. 'Cept his brain is not without flaws because he has yet to figure out that I am actually an idiot. I liked his poem today. If you see him pass on my compliments. As I said before, I agree the horsie is beyond human intelligence and I am sure he would kick me for even mentioning his name amongst our insanity. I'm not slumming! I'm here collecting topaz. I thought that was clear.

Hmm, why have I not seen and video tape of this? I can't believe you are holding out on me!! I thought we were ...uh...vizier and nymph?

There is irony in other stories being dismissed as myths in our current communication. I may still toss the water on you. I didn't really want to see you melt. I just wanted to get you soaked and a squirt gun just seemed childish.


The monkey is a sox fan. Yeah, a big white sox fan.



*quickly leaves to find Ange for that drink*

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Brilliant huh? Must be that glow in the dark tanning lotion.

Tzara is omnipresent and uber intelligent. He is so eloquent that his words seem to stay with me and speak to me even when I am talking to someone else. 'Cept his brain is not without flaws because he has yet to figure out that I am actually an idiot. I liked his poem today. If you see him pass on my compliments. As I said before, I agree the horsie is beyond human intelligence and I am sure he would kick me for even mentioning his name amongst our insanity. I'm not slumming! I'm here collecting topaz. I thought that was clear.

Hmm, why have I not seen and video tape of this? I can't believe you are holding out on me!! I thought we were ...uh...vizier and nymph?

There is irony in other stories being dismissed as myths in our current communication. I may still toss the water on you. I didn't really want to see you melt. I just wanted to get you soaked and a squirt gun just seemed childish.


The monkey is a sox fan. Yeah, a big white sox fan.



*quickly leaves to find Ange for that drink*

For the right price, I have a full set of DVD's you can buy, although the King has so far outbid everyone I've threatened him with. Hence the 2nd mortgage.

Nymphs and their viziers DO wear white t-shirts on occasion. A waterfight... hmmm. A fundraising opportunity occurs to me.

Your next trip to the Caymans could be a very luxurious one if we can pull this off.

And as to the irony comment. Your brilliance, had it even been in question, is now thoroughly obvious. I'd make a pass at you, but I try not to complicate my professional relationships.

And jewelry is the only excuse anyone needs to be anywhere.

Yo yo yo - I got some tourmaline, some raw sapphire and some _sweet_ ametrine you might be interested in as well. First one's free...

WHITE sox? Bite your tongue.
O hell with it, bite mine instead.

bijou

 

[Tathagata]

People do however comment quite often on the intelligence of my rear end . That comment is of course, completely unfounded.

I bet the monkey would wear a Redsox hat. Oh wait, let's make his head explode and get him an autographed Yankees hat. You give it to him though...I'll watch from the tower.

I agree just because something can do tricks doesn't mean it's intelligent.

I'm sure lots of people can open bottles with their rear ends


Yankees?
There used to be a team called the Yankees...then they just disappeared...oh I'd say 12 1/2 games ago

 

[Tathagata]

The monkey already has a Red Sox hat. I saw him sporting one in a recent av. I don't think he'd mind getting the autographed Yankees cap though. He'd just turn around and sell it on e-bay so he could buy Red Sox tickets.

However to be on the safe side I'll meet you for a Campari and soda in another country while the hand-off takes place.

It'd be a strange position to be in because anyone who would want an
autographed Yankees hat would never get me to sell it to them for any price.
Their inability to " buy" what they wanted would be my reward.



Or maybe they could sell Roger Clemens and buy one

 

[Tathagata]

The monkey is a sox fan. Yeah, a big white sox fan.

only when worn by a busty tight-bodiced nurse with a penchant for rectal thermometers


still have those squeaky white shoes oh brainy behinded one??

 

[Sara Crewe]

For the right price, I have a full set of DVD's you can buy, although the King has so far outbid everyone I've threatened him with. Hence the 2nd mortgage.

Nymphs and their viziers DO wear white t-shirts on occasion. A waterfight... hmmm. A fundraising opportunity occurs to me.

Your next trip to the Caymans could be a very luxurious one if we can pull this off.

And as to the irony comment. Your brilliance, had it even been in question, is now thoroughly obvious. I'd make a pass at you, but I try not to complicate my professional relationships.

And jewelry is the only excuse anyone needs to be anywhere.

Yo yo yo - I got some tourmaline, some raw sapphire and some _sweet_ ametrine you might be interested in as well. First one's free...

WHITE sox? Bite your tongue.
O hell with it, bite mine instead.

bijou

How 'bout you just give me the DVDs and we don't mention it to the King at all? I don't really want his money but I think it might be fun to send him blackmail notes. You can buy even buy mismatched cut-out letters in bulk now from Costco. Nasty crime has never been so easy.

A water fight implies a mutual exchange of ammunition. I was leaning more towards an ambush. As a compromise, I'd be happy to ambush you in a white t-shirt and offer you a towel when I was finished.

Wow, you're a professional vizier? I am still just an amateur nymph. It's hard to turn down the endorsements but I want to be able to compete at the next Olympics.


Sooooo, not nice of you to make me drool...where did you say you keep your jewels at night?


Oh stop pretending! You and Tath are both Chicago White Sox Fans and you strongly believe that baseball is not really a sport. It's an activity.

I am scarred for life in terms of tongue biting. The last Vizier whose tongue I nibbled moved at an inopportune moment. He almost has his ability to speak back but it's been a long road.


*smackin' the monkey over the head with the giant thermometer*

 

[champagne1982]

I opened a package from Lulu this morning and was so excited to read some of my favourite poets with my tea, before I turned on my computer. I fear I've been spoiled for the reviews today.

Thanks MTVM, I enjoyed your prose, too. No televisions in my boudoir, ever... (of course my laptop plays DVD's )

 

[unpredictablebijou]

How 'bout you just give me the DVDs and we don't mention it to the King at all? I don't really want his money but I think it might be fun to send him blackmail notes. You can buy even buy mismatched cut-out letters in bulk now from Costco. Nasty crime has never been so easy.

A water fight implies a mutual exchange of ammunition. I was leaning more towards an ambush. As a compromise, I'd be happy to ambush you in a white t-shirt and offer you a towel when I was finished.

Wow, you're a professional vizier? I am still just an amateur nymph. It's hard to turn down the endorsements but I want to be able to compete at the next Olympics.


Sooooo, not nice of you to make me drool...where did you say you keep your jewels at night?


Oh stop pretending! You and Tath are both Chicago White Sox Fans and you strongly believe that baseball is not really a sport. It's an activity.

I am scarred for life in terms of tongue biting. The last Vizier whose tongue I nibbled moved at an inopportune moment. He almost has his ability to speak back but it's been a long road.


*smackin' the monkey over the head with the giant thermometer*

Ambushes make me a little tense, but I'll wear a white t-shirt whenever I'm in the mood to be leapt upon from a tree, or wherever you happen to be floating at the time.

The DVD's are on their way. I think you'll particularly enjoy the one entitled "Produce Section." We'll arrange some sort of ...payment... at a later date. And I suspect it will not involve the biting of any tongues; you're clearly hard on your viziers.

And your cocktail dresses too, I notice. Darling, really. When I showed that last little adventure to the royal cleaners (what WAS that, anyway? Cherry brandy? Grenadine? Framboise? And how on earth did it get so many places? And marshmallow creme? Wait... don't tell me. I don't want to know), I could see that mercenary's eyes light up like he was seeing his new timeshare in the Bahamas. Tulle is SO difficult to launder... Happily, I have a few DVD's of the shenanigans in the royal laundry as well. We came to an understanding.

Viziers don't have Olympic events. We do have a convention every year, though. I'm up for a prize for several of my jewel hoards.

Where's the Poet these days? Is he becoming too good for his own thread?

bijou

 

[Sara Crewe]

Ambushes make me a little tense, but I'll wear a white t-shirt whenever I'm in the mood to be leapt upon from a tree, or wherever you happen to be floating at the time.

The DVD's are on their way. I think you'll particularly enjoy the one entitled "Produce Section." We'll arrange some sort of ...payment... at a later date. And I suspect it will not involve the biting of any tongues; you're clearly hard on your viziers.

And your cocktail dresses too, I notice. Darling, really. When I showed that last little adventure to the royal cleaners (what WAS that, anyway? Cherry brandy? Grenadine? Framboise? And how on earth did it get so many places? And marshmallow creme? Wait... don't tell me. I don't want to know), I could see that mercenary's eyes light up like he was seeing his new timeshare in the Bahamas. Tulle is SO difficult to launder... Happily, I have a few DVD's of the shenanigans in the royal laundry as well. We came to an understanding.

Viziers don't have Olympic events. We do have a convention every year, though. I'm up for a prize for several of my jewel hoards.

Where's the Poet these days? Is he becoming too good for his own thread?

bijou

We will have a water armistice then...wouldn't want you tense or stressed in any way 'cause I am a relatively peaceful nymph.

Oh goodie. Just in time for the weekend and I was without plans. I am hard on everyone in my life. I would apologize but that would well, imply that I was sorry and indicate perhaps that I might change.

Oh. The dress. Well, I was walking along in my cocktail gown and I blew a heel on my favourite strappy sandals and fell into a raspberry bush. I was carrying a grocery bag full of marshmallows and the bottom ripped. I bumped my head on a rock when I hit the ground I passed out. The marshmallows scattered everywhere. In the heat of the sun the marshmallows melted onto my dress and because I rolled into the bush the raspberry stains were all over the whole dress.
Um, yeah...that's what happened. Thanks for covering for me and ensuring the quality of my laundry.

If you build it, he will come. That, or shine a big P in the sky.


I have to go write a bleepin poem because my nymph duties begin early tomorrow and I intend to misbehave tomorrow evening.

 

[TheRainMan]

We will have a water armistice then...wouldn't want you tense or stressed in any way 'cause I am a relatively peaceful nymph.

Oh goodie. Just in time for the weekend and I was without plans. I am hard on everyone in my life. I would apologize but that would well, imply that I was sorry and indicate perhaps that I might change.

Oh. The dress. Well, I was walking along in my cocktail gown and I blew a heel on my favourite strappy sandals and fell into a raspberry bush. I was carrying a grocery bag full of marshmallows and the bottom ripped. I bumped my head on a rock when I hit the ground I passed out. The marshmallows scattered everywhere. In the heat of the sun the marshmallows melted onto my dress and because I rolled into the bush the raspberry stains were all over the whole dress.
Um, yeah...that's what happened. Thanks for covering for me and ensuring the quality of my laundry.

If you build it, he will come. That, or shine a big P in the sky.


I have to go write a bleepin poem because my nymph duties begin early tomorrow and I intend to misbehave tomorrow evening.

you're both loonier than a soup sandwich.

carry on.

 

[Sara Crewe]

you're both loonier than a soup sandwich.

carry on.

Takes one to know one.