Brain Wide Shut?

[Jay Davis]

How many of us seek, as I often do, to shut our over active brains down and just experience pure sensation?

The idea of that is so appealing to me. Though I find it rather hard to achieve. Life is so busy and I'm always in charge of so many things. My mind is nearly always going off in a hundred directions at once.

So is anyone else out there trying to shut down that pesky brain when they play?

In my personal experience, that is exactly what subspace is about--complete loss of rational thought, with nothing left but pure sensation enveloping the consciousness. In slightly different ways, it happens to me when I am active (worshipping, massaging, etc.) or passive (bound, teased, punished or rewarded). It is, actually, a very zen state, a time in which I feel in tune with the universe and a vital part of something much larger than myself. Though I am not one to try to reverse-engineer my own subspace, I find it to be a very peaceful, serene and spiritual state, regardless of what happened or is happening to my physical body to put me there.

More than one play partner has told me that, compared to other most other bottoms, I enter subspace very easily and go very, very deep. These comments were offered with a mixture of appreciation and warning, the latter because they felt that I would be extremely vulnerable to exploitation in that state.

One cautionary incident occurred entirely by accident during one of my very first real scenes, in which I was handcuffed behind my back. She had me on the floor on my back, with my hands under my body, for quite some time. I was at this point completely gone into space, of course. When She rolled me over, She was alarmed to find my left hand was blue--my weight had squeezed that cuff so tight it had cut the circulation and pinched the nerves, and I hadn't said anything about it. I vaguely remember feeling the pinch, not as pain, but just as a sensory detail; it didn't bother me in the least in the condition I was in. She couldn't imagine how I could possibly NOT have at least coded Yellow to get the cuff fixed; I can't imagine having been capable of using a safeword in that state.

It was about three weeks before the tingling in that hand went away and I had full sensation again.

 

[FurryFury]

In my personal experience, that is exactly what subspace is about--complete loss of rational thought, with nothing left but pure sensation enveloping the consciousness. In slightly different ways, it happens to me when I am active (worshipping, massaging, etc.) or passive (bound, teased, punished or rewarded). It is, actually, a very zen state, a time in which I feel in tune with the universe and a vital part of something much larger than myself. Though I am not one to try to reverse-engineer my own subspace, I find it to be a very peaceful, serene and spiritual state, regardless of what happened or is happening to my physical body to put me there.

More than one play partner has told me that, compared to other most other bottoms, I enter subspace very easily and go very, very deep. These comments were offered with a mixture of appreciation and warning, the latter because they felt that I would be extremely vulnerable to exploitation in that state.

One cautionary incident occurred entirely by accident during one of my very first real scenes, in which I was handcuffed behind my back. She had me on the floor on my back, with my hands under my body, for quite some time. I was at this point completely gone into space, of course. When She rolled me over, She was alarmed to find my left hand was blue--my weight had squeezed that cuff so tight it had cut the circulation and pinched the nerves, and I hadn't said anything about it. I vaguely remember feeling the pinch, not as pain, but just as a sensory detail; it didn't bother me in the least in the condition I was in. She couldn't imagine how I could possibly NOT have at least coded Yellow to get the cuff fixed; I can't imagine having been capable of using a safeword in that state.

It was about three weeks before the tingling in that hand went away and I had full sensation again.

Jay, Jay, Jay...

Thank you for sharing that story. I want that feeling so much. The good one not the blue hand one!

*hugs*

Fury

 

[catalina_francisco]

I vaguely remember feeling the pinch, not as pain, but just as a sensory detail; it didn't bother me in the least in the condition I was in. She couldn't imagine how I could possibly NOT have at least coded Yellow to get the cuff fixed; I can't imagine having been capable of using a safeword in that state.

It was about three weeks before the tingling in that hand went away and I had full sensation again.

This is one of the 2 main reasons F is not a fan of subspace and why he has made it clear it is not an option for me to get into.

Catalina

 

[FurryFury]

This is one of the 2 main reasons F is not a fan of subspace and why he has made it clear it is not an option for me to get into.

Catalina

But...but I WANT that sub space thing! I want it bad! I really do!

Fury

 

[leanoir]

If you want subspace that badly, I'd recommend - as someone else has already done - manual labor. If you don't want to swing a hammer, then clean your house or your apartment from top to bottom. It works wonders! By the end, you're tired but satisfied and all you want to do is sit down with a cool drink and just absorb the peaceful feeling that fills you.

At least, that's what happens to me...which is why my roommates and I save a full house cleaning for days when we're really upset or stressed out. You really burn off a lot of worry that way.

 

[FurryFury]

If you want subspace that badly, I'd recommend - as someone else has already done - manual labor. If you don't want to swing a hammer, then clean your house or your apartment from top to bottom. It works wonders! By the end, you're tired but satisfied and all you want to do is sit down with a cool drink and just absorb the peaceful feeling that fills you.

At least, that's what happens to me...which is why my roommates and I save a full house cleaning for days when we're really upset or stressed out. You really burn off a lot of worry that way.

Um, I wish housework did that for me. It so doesn't! Ugh! I hate it! In fact, when I clean the house? Either it's because people are coming over and I have to? Or I'm really pissed off. It's never a nice zen thing.

There have been times though that I was so physically tired I did have a certain lovely serenity. I wouldn't call it sub space. I hope sub space is a bit more than that.

Fury

 

[Jay Davis]

Physical exhaustion--especially when accompanied by a REALLY hot shower--can induce a feeling of serenity and comfort for me, but it's not the same as subspace.

Subspace as I feel it is kind of hard to describe. It's not induced just by physical sensation--it takes the attention of a Dominant that I trust to induce. A big chunk of bringing it on is the sensation of being completely naked and vulnerable (emotionally even moreso than physically) to someone else.

Two of the first women to top me had extensive experience as subs, and as I have mentioned elsewhere, councelled me very carefully about the risks of subspace to someone like myself. They were especially vehement about being extra-careful in choosing partners who were not only of good intent, but also of some experience and skill. The handcuff incident happened with a different woman, whom I am quite sure had never played with anyone who went nearly as deep as me.

Since that time, I am careful to brief anyone I play with (which hasn't been all that many people, frankly, sad to say...) about this issue. I am not 100% certain that I can be relied to safeword if I need to, and warn them about that specifically. They have generally found the plus side of it to be worth the added responsibility it places on them, and I haven't had any scares like the handcuff thing since. Of course, I'm VERY leery of police-style handcuffs at this point--I prefer to stick with leather cuffs or ropes, whichever a Domme prefers.

I'm not entirely sure how anyone can be "against" subspace, Catalina, or for it, for that matter. It's something that happens, or it doesn't, I think. I suppose that a top could limit play to such a degree that the sub never experienced it, but that seems like a loss to me. Of course, the degree of play that would be possible without hitting that zone would vary widely from individual to individual; maybe some subs with a high threshold of pain and a considerable resistance to subspace could be played with pretty intensely without slipping into space. For myself, if a Domme who has the foggiest idea what She's doing works on me, I'm there, whether we want me to or not.

Frankly, if it weren't for subspace, I wouldn't do kinky scenes--I'd just stick to vanilla sex. Subspace is the defining difference between the two for me, whether it's induced by sensation applied to me, or by service offered to Her. (Although I can remember getting pretty spacey a few times in my vanilla life, during extended sessions down south; at the time, I didn't know what it meant, I just knew that giving head made me feel really good too...)

(Edited for a typo that made me look very illiterate.)

 

[Netzach]

I've managed to keep a bottom "up" above the surface of the deep, as it were during a scene with pointed interrogation, a few slaps to the face, usually grilling someone or *making* them talk will do it. It's virtually impossible, in my experience, to go totally under and yet answer a question or respond verbally to something going on, as it engages the conscious brain when the subconscious/animal brain just wants to overload or float around.

There are times I want my sinkers to sink (Japanese bondage scenes, mummifications) and there are times I enjoy keeping the bottom just this side of happy and comfortable. I can't always control it, you are quite right, if it's happening, it's happening, but I have a few strategies up my sleeve to play the instrument to my liking.

 

[FurryFury]

Physical exhaustion--especially when accompanied by a REALLY hot shower--can induce a feeling of serenity and comfort for me, but it's not the same as subspace.

Subspace as I feel it is kind of hard to describe. It's not induced just by physical sensation--it takes the attention of a Dominant that I trust to induce. A big chunk of bringing it on is the sensation of being completely naked and vulnerable (emotionally even moreso than physically) to someone else.

Two of the first women to top me had extensive experience as subs, and as I have mentioned elsewhere, councelled me very carefully about the risks of subspace to someone like myself. They were especially vehement about being extra-careful in choosing partners who were not only of good intent, but also of some experience and skill. The handcuff incident happened with a different woman, whom I am quite sure had never played with anyone who went nearly as deep as me.

Since that time, I am careful to brief anyone I play with (which hasn't been all that many people, frankly, sad to say...) about this issue. I am not 100% certain that I can be relied to safeword if I need to, and warn them about that specifically. They have generally found the plus side of it to be worth the added responsibility it places on them, and I haven't had any scares like the handcuff thing since. Of course, I'm VERY leery of police-style handcuffs at this point--I prefer to stick with leather cuffs or ropes, whichever a Domme prefers.

I'm not entirely sure how anyone can be "against" subspace, Catalina, or for it, for that matter. It's something that happens, or it doesn't, I think. I suppose that a top could limit play to such a degree that the sub never experienced it, but that seems like a loss to me. Of course, the degree of play that would be possible without hitting that zone would vary widely from individual to individual; maybe some subs with a high threshold of pain and a considerable resistance to subspace could be played with pretty intensely without slipping into space. For myself, if a Domme who has the foggiest idea what She's doing works on me, I'm there, whether we want me to or not.

Frankly, if it weren't for subspace, I wouldn't do kinky scenes--I'd just stick to vanilla sex. Subspace is the defining difference between the two for me, whether it's induced by sensation applied to me, or by service offered to Her. (Although I can remember getting pretty spacey a few times in my vanilla life, during extended sessions down south; at the time, I didn't know what it meant, I just knew that giving head made me feel really good too...)

(Edited for a typo that made me look very illiterate.)

Oh Jay!

That is SO much what I want to experience! It really is!

Fury

 

[Marquis]

I don't think I've ever even seen sub space. I would love to wield that sort of power one day.

 

[Private_Label]

It's never a nice zen thing.

There have been times though that I was so physically tired I did have a certain lovely serenity. I wouldn't call it sub space. I hope sub space is a bit more than that.

Fury

It sounds like the place I go when I am reading. I can get so engrossed in it that people have stood next to me and said my name and I don't hear them. I have occasionally done that at work too, just let my mind wander while my hands do familiar routine things.

 

[FurryFury]

I don't think I've ever even seen sub space. I would love to wield that sort of power one day.

Hi Marquis!

My guess is, that you will someday! I've heard there is "Dom" space too. That scares me though because they are supposed to be like the designated drivers at the party! Right?

I would LOVE to hear some more first hand accounts of sub space! Like Jay Davis posted.

One of the first stories I read here was Tales From Sub Space and I LOVED it. I still do! One might even say I'm obsessed with it. I'm trying to start a srp along those lines.

I want to experience that in any way open to me. If you can visualize it, you can come close and in some instances make it happen.

Fury

It sounds like the place I go when I am reading. I can get so engrossed in it that people have stood next to me and said my name and I don't hear them. I have occasionally done that at work too, just let my mind wander while my hands do familiar routine things.

Hi Private_Label!

I know what you mean about reading. That is why reading has always been a refuge for me. I believe and hope that sub space is more though.

I have been known to tune everyone and everything out and just concentrate on one thing. I can be easily startled when someone or something shows up and I didn't expect it.

I remember this one time when I was working. I think I greatly disappointed a poor man who thought he had my attention.

Once upon a time a long time ago I went on a business trip to Mobile Alabama. It's a terrible place to recruit because no one wants to move from Mobile. God knows why. I stayed in the Holiday Inn Holidome there. Interviewed mostly men at least twice my age there and at night I'd go out to a bar.

I'd go and get free happy hour eats and play pool, backgammon, chess, whatever they had. I might sing with the band from time to time and dance a lot. Alny way this particular time, I met this guy who was fun and fairly nice.

We spent a lot of time together that one night and may have ended up in the pool or hot tub. I can't really remember. It's likely because that was the whole reason I booked at that hotel to do the pool and hot tub. I know was still doing the whole virgin thing so I know it didn't go that far.

He wanted to get with me the next night. I told him he could try but I had business dinner.
Then I went to bed alone. I remember masturbating with ice...did that a lot on business trips. Free ice was fun. I had no toys back then.

So the next day I did some more interviews, started setting up times for the men I thought had potential to interview with my clients, and finished most of the details for that trip. Then I went to dinner with a Regional manager at a Steak and Ale.

I am a very focused person bottom line type of person. I got the damn contracts signed, flirted just enough to grease the wheels but not too much to gum up the works. Everything went peachy, I closed the deal. T

I got back to the hotel around 10:00 PM or so. The dude from the night before had left like six messages and was calling as I walked in the door. He was frantic on the phone with me. Apologizing all over himself. I couldn't figure out what the big was. So I asked him what he thought I was upset about.

Turns out he was there in the same restaurant that night. He thought I was pissed cause he was with some other girl. LMAO!

I never saw him see, because I was focused on just the one thing. Period. He said I looked right at him too. I was like, dude, I just met you last night. I go home tomorrow, why should I care? I don't mean to hurt your feelings we had a good time last night but I never even saw you at the restaurant I was working.

So that is me, all focused like, business is business, play is play. I compartmentalize and hit both hard. Lately I've been integrating and multi-tasking more. I guess I have too. There is too much to do and too much going on!

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

I've managed to keep a bottom "up" above the surface of the deep, as it were during a scene with pointed interrogation, a few slaps to the face, usually grilling someone or *making* them talk will do it. It's virtually impossible, in my experience, to go totally under and yet answer a question or respond verbally to something going on, as it engages the conscious brain when the subconscious/animal brain just wants to overload or float around.

There are times I want my sinkers to sink (Japanese bondage scenes, mummifications) and there are times I enjoy keeping the bottom just this side of happy and comfortable. I can't always control it, you are quite right, if it's happening, it's happening, but I have a few strategies up my sleeve to play the instrument to my liking.

Hi Netzach!

This is a very interesting post. I'm going to think about it a while. Thanks for the food for thought.

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

Notice how often your attention is in the past or future, ask yourself: Is there joy, ease and lightness in what I am doing? If not, then psychological time is covering up the present moment and life is misperceived as a burden or a struggle. ~ The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

I love this calendar!

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

I've managed to keep a bottom "up" above the surface of the deep, as it were during a scene with pointed interrogation, a few slaps to the face, usually grilling someone or *making* them talk will do it. It's virtually impossible, in my experience, to go totally under and yet answer a question or respond verbally to something going on, as it engages the conscious brain when the subconscious/animal brain just wants to overload or float around.

There are times I want my sinkers to sink (Japanese bondage scenes, mummifications) and there are times I enjoy keeping the bottom just this side of happy and comfortable. I can't always control it, you are quite right, if it's happening, it's happening, but I have a few strategies up my sleeve to play the instrument to my liking.

Now that I've thought about this Netzach, I can totally see why a Domme would want to pull at sub back from sub space if it makes the non responsive.

When I first read it I was thinking from the POV of the sub. So I thought, "Hey I wanna hit that sub space don't anyone dare take it from me!" LOL.

Now I can see it from both sides, in my mind anyway. I can't wait to do so in real life though!

Fury

 

[Jay Davis]

I've managed to keep a bottom "up" above the surface of the deep, as it were during a scene with pointed interrogation, a few slaps to the face, usually grilling someone or *making* them talk will do it. It's virtually impossible, in my experience, to go totally under and yet answer a question or respond verbally to something going on, as it engages the conscious brain when the subconscious/animal brain just wants to overload or float around.

There are times I want my sinkers to sink (Japanese bondage scenes, mummifications) and there are times I enjoy keeping the bottom just this side of happy and comfortable. I can't always control it, you are quite right, if it's happening, it's happening, but I have a few strategies up my sleeve to play the instrument to my liking.

This lines up with my experience perfectly. I know it is possible to keep pulling a sub back from space, because it's been done to me. Demanding verbal responses works better than anything else, at least for me, because I get VERY non-verbal when I am deep in subspace. Face-slapping would probably work too, since for me at least, it's really not something that's ever fun--it's always a jolt. For someone who was into it, tho, I can imagine it would actually work to put them deeper. Each sub is different, and the best Dommes learn and use these differences.

"...I have a few strategies up my sleeve to play the instrument to my liking." Exactly! The idea of being that instrument, played masterfully, is tremendously exciting to me. A Domme who has the touch to skillfully control my immersion in and re-emergence from subspace is truly gifted. Actually, just thinking about how you put it, Netzach, gets me just the tiniest bit spacey...

I realize now that I should clarify something about the handcuff story...that happened to me VERY early in my BDSM history, and in play with a Domme who wasn't that much more experienced than I was at the time. I can't believe for a moment that it would have happened on the watch of either of the two women I mentioned with the pre-Domme history as subs--they were both far to skilled to let something like that happen. In fact, neither of them had any interest in handcuffs at all, for just that reason--handcuffs are inherently dangerous. Leather cuffs or even ropes are much safer. When the handcuff thing happened, it happened with both a Domme and a sub who really didn't understand the hazards of the toy we were playing with. There's a lesson in that, too, that has nothing whatsoever to do with subspace.

 

[FurryFury]

Thanks for the clarification Jay!

I need some restraints. *nods a lot* It won't be handcuffs probably, but I need something. The silky ties from my robes might work but I suspect they will be too slippery to hold.

Fury

 

[Private_Label]

...handcuffs are inherently dangerous. Leather cuffs or even ropes are much safer. When the handcuff thing happened, it happened with both a Domme and a sub who really didn't understand the hazards of the toy we were playing with. There's a lesson in that, too, that has nothing whatsoever to do with subspace.

The lesson being: Buy double locking handcuffs? (Until yesterday, I never knew that handcuffs could be made to NOT get tighter as well as not get looser...)

 

[FurryFury]

The lesson being: Buy double locking handcuffs? (Until yesterday, I never knew that handcuffs could be made to NOT get tighter as well as not get looser...)

And that is what life is all about learning new things everyday!

*smiles*

Fury

 

[FurryFury]

Thought of the day, true or not?

"Thinking is only a small aspect of consciousness. Thought cannot exist without consciousness, but consciousness does not need thought."

(I love my power of now bill paying calendar!)

Fury

 

[La Kajira]

How do you tell, when you've hit that stage? Sub space. How do you know?

I imagine it's probably not possible in online writing?

 

[Marquis]

I imagine it's probably not possible in online writing?

Bringing someone to subspace through writing?

Man, I'd love to meet that writer.

 

[Red Sonja]

How do you tell, when you've hit that stage? Sub space. How do you know?

I imagine it's probably not possible in online writing?

I've never gotten there in online writing. LOL. Maybe because I keep waiting for paragraphs... I mean, it definitely is painful but not in a fun, spanky way.

The other way... yep, I go to subspace. Dh doesn't like it too well because I become very uncommunicative. I'm completely rendered speechless... just through the power of the sensations. Safewords aren't real helpful at that point.

How to tell?? Umm, it may vary from person to person. Dh gauges it by how long it takes for me to respond to something verbally. How do I gauge it? I just know. You may find you have to visit it to know what it is...

I wish you joy on the journey, though!

 

[La Kajira]

Ah, rattzle.

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh... thanks guys, I appreciate the feedback.

 

[FurryFury]

How do you tell, when you've hit that stage? Sub space. How do you know?

I imagine it's probably not possible in online writing?

Probably not, at least I hope I wouldn't be able to coherently write at that time. However should you, ever find someone that can do that? I totally want him writing me too! LOL!

Unfortunately, I can't say with any authority as I have yet to experience sub space. *le sigh* I'm fervently seek that and many, many other things.

Fury

Bringing someone to subspace through writing?

Man, I'd love to meet that writer.

Me too Marquis! Me too!

Fury

I've never gotten there in online writing. LOL. Maybe because I keep waiting for paragraphs... I mean, it definitely is painful but not in a fun, spanky way.

The other way... yep, I go to subspace. Dh doesn't like it too well because I become very uncommunicative. I'm completely rendered speechless... just through the power of the sensations. Safewords aren't real helpful at that point.

How to tell?? Umm, it may vary from person to person. Dh gauges it by how long it takes for me to respond to something verbally. How do I gauge it? I just know. You may find you have to visit it to know what it is...

I wish you joy on the journey, though!

Sounds lovely Red Sonja!

I would love to visit there for a spell, soon.

Fury