Sprinkles22
Angel with a Crooked Halo
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Darth Betticus?? Oh My *faints* ... I'm a major SWs geek!Betticus said:Darth Betticus! Har!
Of course, when I get it down I'll just be known worldwide as "Betticus".
Childhood Discipline?
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FurryFury
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I was hit, slapped and spanked often before the age of three. After that age I was rarely spanked but was sometimes grabbing and dragged around the house in anger, thrown to the floor with my head being banged into it and so on.
I truly HATE corporal punishment. For many years and sometimes even now, I would flinch if someone raised their hands or fists but this was a knee jerk and subconscious reaction until I (somewhat recently) became aware of the above slapping and spanking before the age of three.
I could not hit my kids on a regular basis as "punishment." It simply turns my stomach to do it or have it in my home. I was very afraid while pregnant that I would be violent with them and have no patience. For the most part that has been blessedly untrue of me. I won't say I've never hit them but those times have been rare indeed and has had some cause, IMO. It was still wrong. I always said I was sorry and meant it.
Likewise I don't allow physical or emotional violence in my home either as a sibling conflict thing, parent against child, child against parent or parent against parent. I set the rules. That violates them. Anytime the rules have been broken an apology has been given from the aggressor to the victim and in most cases vice versa because it does take two to reach such a point.
I love to spank and be spanked and much more. I don't consider such things as violent or corporal punishment but as pleasure that I only take with my husband in a sensual and sexual way. I don't think my childhood experiences are much related to my current sexual needs and interests. Considering how I feel about them it would seem counterintuitive, but who knows?
Certainly not I.
Fury
I truly HATE corporal punishment. For many years and sometimes even now, I would flinch if someone raised their hands or fists but this was a knee jerk and subconscious reaction until I (somewhat recently) became aware of the above slapping and spanking before the age of three.
I could not hit my kids on a regular basis as "punishment." It simply turns my stomach to do it or have it in my home. I was very afraid while pregnant that I would be violent with them and have no patience. For the most part that has been blessedly untrue of me. I won't say I've never hit them but those times have been rare indeed and has had some cause, IMO. It was still wrong. I always said I was sorry and meant it.
Likewise I don't allow physical or emotional violence in my home either as a sibling conflict thing, parent against child, child against parent or parent against parent. I set the rules. That violates them. Anytime the rules have been broken an apology has been given from the aggressor to the victim and in most cases vice versa because it does take two to reach such a point.
I love to spank and be spanked and much more. I don't consider such things as violent or corporal punishment but as pleasure that I only take with my husband in a sensual and sexual way. I don't think my childhood experiences are much related to my current sexual needs and interests. Considering how I feel about them it would seem counterintuitive, but who knows?
Certainly not I.
Fury
Sprinkles22
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Fury, I'm so sorry you had that type of experience. Sadly, too many children experience abuse of that natureFurryFury said:I was hit, slapped and spanked often before the age of three. After that age I was rarely spanked but was sometimes grabbing and dragged around the house in anger, thrown to the floor with my head being banged into it and so on.
I truly HATE corporal punishment. For many years and sometimes even now, I would flinch if someone raised their hands or fists but this was a knee jerk and subconscious reaction until I (somewhat recently) became aware of the above slapping and spanking before the age of three.
I could not hit my kids on a regular basis as "punishment." It simply turns my stomach to do it or have it in my home. I was very afraid while pregnant that I would be violent with them and have no patience. For the most part that has been blessedly untrue of me. I won't say I've never hit them but those times have been rare indeed and has had some cause, IMO. It was still wrong. I always said I was sorry and meant it.
Likewise I don't allow physical or emotional violence in my home either as a sibling conflict thing, parent against child, child against parent or parent against parent. I set the rules. That violates them. Anytime the rules have been broken an apology has been given from the aggressor to the victim and in most cases vice versa because it does take two to reach such a point.
I love to spank and be spanked and much more. I don't consider such things as violent or corporal punishment but as pleasure that I only take with my husband in a sensual and sexual way. I don't think my childhood experiences are much related to my current sexual needs and interests. Considering how I feel about them it would seem counterintuitive, but who knows?
Certainly not I.
Fury
I rarely spank my children because I think it would be inappropriate considering my love of the activity.
callinectes
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Fury, I too am sorry to read of your treatment. You have my deepest admiration for breaking that cycle and taking the approach you have with your family.
Regardng the OP..I was spanked as a child, not often, but it happened. On a few occasions I got it with the belt. I have no idea why I enjoy spanking now and I do not have flashbacks to childhood when I am recieving one. However, I was punished with the belt once by my Dom and it did transport me back to a particular time when I was was spanked with the belt by my Dad. It was unsettling and freaked me out a bit. We talked about it afterwards and I don't think he will bring out the belt again. Of course, I avoid punishement like the plague anyway, so hopefully he won't be looking for other methods any time soon.
Regardng the OP..I was spanked as a child, not often, but it happened. On a few occasions I got it with the belt. I have no idea why I enjoy spanking now and I do not have flashbacks to childhood when I am recieving one. However, I was punished with the belt once by my Dom and it did transport me back to a particular time when I was was spanked with the belt by my Dad. It was unsettling and freaked me out a bit. We talked about it afterwards and I don't think he will bring out the belt again. Of course, I avoid punishement like the plague anyway, so hopefully he won't be looking for other methods any time soon.
FurryFury
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Thanks Sprinkles and Callinectes,
What I went through was nothing compared to many who are close to me and have confided in me. Such things are horrible but they are also the way life regrettably often is.
I will say this. The last time I was spanked by one of my parents and the only time I consciously remember I was very clear of thought. Those thoughts went as follows. This is the worst they can do? Fuck them. The minute they are done I will go and do it again only THIS time I won't get caught.
IMO corporal punishment of many stripes simply makes a person more deceitful and rebellious. That's not what I'm after in myself or anyone else.
I like to use the term consequences. Whenever possible I like to see natural consequences and if not that penalties occur rather than punishment and such. I think one learns more. Primarily that their behavior is KEY to what happens in their life.
Fury
What I went through was nothing compared to many who are close to me and have confided in me. Such things are horrible but they are also the way life regrettably often is.
I will say this. The last time I was spanked by one of my parents and the only time I consciously remember I was very clear of thought. Those thoughts went as follows. This is the worst they can do? Fuck them. The minute they are done I will go and do it again only THIS time I won't get caught.
IMO corporal punishment of many stripes simply makes a person more deceitful and rebellious. That's not what I'm after in myself or anyone else.
I like to use the term consequences. Whenever possible I like to see natural consequences and if not that penalties occur rather than punishment and such. I think one learns more. Primarily that their behavior is KEY to what happens in their life.
Fury
IsabellaSnow
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Raised by my mother, who was fond of spankings.
Unfortunately, I was a very mouthy child, so spankings were a daily occurrence.
(Obviously the spankings did nothing to curb my mouthiness )
Until I was about 10, she just used to chase me around the house until she caught me and then spank me barehanded somewhere between 10 and 20 times.
When I reached 13 she switched to the spoon - plastic. Ouch. But that didnt stop me either - just made me run raster.
As I mentioned in another thread, I have always wanted a "proper" spanking from a man (sexually speaking, I mean) but havent had one.
Can safely say I want no spoons involved.
Unfortunately, I was a very mouthy child, so spankings were a daily occurrence.
(Obviously the spankings did nothing to curb my mouthiness
)Until I was about 10, she just used to chase me around the house until she caught me and then spank me barehanded somewhere between 10 and 20 times.
When I reached 13 she switched to the spoon - plastic. Ouch. But that didnt stop me either - just made me run raster.
As I mentioned in another thread, I have always wanted a "proper" spanking from a man (sexually speaking, I mean) but havent had one.
Can safely say I want no spoons involved.
Sprinkles22
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LOL ... were we separated at birth???IsabellaSnow said:Raised by my mother, who was fond of spankings. Unfortunately, I was a very mouthy child, so spankings were a daily occurrence.
(Obviously the spankings did nothing to curb my mouthiness
Until I was about 10, she just used to chase me around the house until she caught me and then spank me barehanded somewhere between 10 and 20 times.
When I reached 13 she switched to the spoon - plastic. Ouch. But that didnt stop me either - just made me run raster.
As I mentioned in another thread, I have always wanted a "proper" spanking from a man (sexually speaking, I mean) but havent had one.
Can safely say I want no spoons involved.
IsabellaSnow
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Possibly!
Kailey_86
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i was spanked on the rare occasion but i don't think that has anything to do with my enjoyment of it now. i think i enjoy spankings and other kinds of pain because of the control aspect of it and my enjoyment of pain. i like pain and i submit to it and to the person who is implementing it. THAT is what gets to me.
i was put in the corner for punishment as a kid. i HATED it. When a Dom tells me that this is what He will use as a punishment on me these days i am briefly turned on but then i wise up because this is not something i would enjoy. The brief arousal comes from the dominance.
i was put in the corner for punishment as a kid. i HATED it. When a Dom tells me that this is what He will use as a punishment on me these days i am briefly turned on but then i wise up because this is not something i would enjoy. The brief arousal comes from the dominance.
DrDon
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My spankings as a child consisted of bending over the bed, spreading my legs and a leather belt used on my ass. Quite hard. Can't remember how many, but up to 10 swats. If I was really bad, I would had to pull my jeans and underwear to my ankles and spread my legs for the belt spanking. Ouch. The spankings were always given by mother and on rare occasion, dad.
A friend of mine use be spanked with old orange Hot Wheel tracks when he was a kid! Those damn things hurt!
A friend of mine use be spanked with old orange Hot Wheel tracks when he was a kid! Those damn things hurt!
Sprinkles22
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It's amazing what a Mother can find in the toy box arsenalDrDon said:
Sprinkles22
Angel with a Crooked Halo
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Remember these? Geez, I still cringe when I see these in the toy isle at the store. That's just parental sadism, I tell ya. Disguising something so vile as a play toyDrDon said:
This is something I can totally offer feedback on.
As a child, I was spanked. Frequently. Some might say that it bordered on abuse. (Okay, that's what my dom/husband says.) I was spanked with whatever could be found and whatever could inflict the most pain as possible. You know the threat parents had where they would say that they would spank you so hard you couldn't sit down? I have been spanked that hard. Often. And it continued until I was 15.
Because of that, I always hated spanking. Even play spanking. Guy friends would playfully slap my bum and I would instantly become enraged. It triggered all sorts of negative emotions for me.
And yet, I love to be spanked now. It's a favourite activity of ours. I don't believe that it is really connected to how I was raised. I like many other aspects of BDSM, not just the spanking. The spanking seems to just tie into it. It's part of a larger picture. Then again, maybe I like the idea of being disciplined in love by someone who wants to bring me pleasure as opposed to being disciplined in anger by someone who only wants to tear me down.
I never thought about it that way before. And now I am. It's very interesting.
As a child, I was spanked. Frequently. Some might say that it bordered on abuse. (Okay, that's what my dom/husband says.) I was spanked with whatever could be found and whatever could inflict the most pain as possible. You know the threat parents had where they would say that they would spank you so hard you couldn't sit down? I have been spanked that hard. Often. And it continued until I was 15.
Because of that, I always hated spanking. Even play spanking. Guy friends would playfully slap my bum and I would instantly become enraged. It triggered all sorts of negative emotions for me.
And yet, I love to be spanked now. It's a favourite activity of ours. I don't believe that it is really connected to how I was raised. I like many other aspects of BDSM, not just the spanking. The spanking seems to just tie into it. It's part of a larger picture. Then again, maybe I like the idea of being disciplined in love by someone who wants to bring me pleasure as opposed to being disciplined in anger by someone who only wants to tear me down.
I never thought about it that way before. And now I am. It's very interesting.
Sprinkles22
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Thank you for your feedback, Linyari. I think you phrased it beautifully when you said
I have to say, I was never disciplined in anger by my parents. I suppose I'm one of the few lucky ones. Something about it, tho, even as an adult is soothing ... lol, if you can call it that
linyari said:
I have to say, I was never disciplined in anger by my parents. I suppose I'm one of the few lucky ones. Something about it, tho, even as an adult is soothing ... lol, if you can call it that
FurryFury
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Punishment is what I considered spanking by my parents.
That's different from discipline or consequences in my opinion.
Punishment just pissed me off and made me find ways to hide stuff so I wouldn't get in trouble. Oh the things I did! Most of them were never found out about by any "authority figure" and with damn good reason.
Whereas being spanked or something, also desired, and having orgasms with or by my partner is a wonderful thing. It is sought out by me. It is therapy. It feels right. It feels good. I need it to be in a good frame of mind and mood.
Fury
That's different from discipline or consequences in my opinion.
Punishment just pissed me off and made me find ways to hide stuff so I wouldn't get in trouble. Oh the things I did! Most of them were never found out about by any "authority figure" and with damn good reason.
Whereas being spanked or something, also desired, and having orgasms with or by my partner is a wonderful thing. It is sought out by me. It is therapy. It feels right. It feels good. I need it to be in a good frame of mind and mood.
Fury
My grandmother spanked me ONCE and it was the worst experience of my life. She used my grandfather's leather belt which had a heavy belt buckle. The edge of it caught on my skin (I was bare bottomed at the time) and ripped a 5 inch gash along the top of my buttocks.
She never did it again and I never misbehaved to the point of her needing to get it out (though, canny woman she was, she always threatened it. Of course years later she told me how horrified she'd been at seeing it and vowed never to raise a hand to me again. A vow she kept).
In a way this did shape my adult sexual practices as I never allow any man to use a belt on me. If he even attempts it, I'm out the door.
She never did it again and I never misbehaved to the point of her needing to get it out (though, canny woman she was, she always threatened it. Of course years later she told me how horrified she'd been at seeing it and vowed never to raise a hand to me again. A vow she kept).
In a way this did shape my adult sexual practices as I never allow any man to use a belt on me. If he even attempts it, I'm out the door.
Sprinkles22
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Being that I never, not once, felt the belt I have a fascination with it now. I had nothing to compare it to, to say it was bad.Rubnesque said:
But, damn, there's just something incredibly sexy to me about a man sliding his belt out of his pants and doubling it over with THAT look in his eyes
Sprinkles22 said:Being that I never, not once, felt the belt I have a fascination with it now. I had nothing to compare it to, to say it was bad.
But, damn, there's just something incredibly sexy to me about a man sliding his belt out of his pants and doubling it over with THAT look in his eyes
Oh, I love that look too, but somehow seeing my grandmother's face superimposed above his while he's taking off his belt just kinda ruins it for me.
