Come take a peek inside Aussie's marriage

This is so relatable. On a couple of levels.

I, too, categorize solutions, and then narrow down the field. It makes most of the people around me so crazy, for some reason I have yet to understand. 🤷‍♀️

That feeling, when behavioral traits that have long aggravated others are thought adorable. It is healing. So much. The world flips on axis and you see yourself in a completely different light. :rose:
 
I'm going to give you a shout out about something you mentioned in the Ranger Boy audio.

I have three older brothers. When I was in my teen years, the reckless years, my oldest brother gave me a piece of his hard learned advice that I took to heart and never regretted.

He said, "Unless you knew you were going to sleep with someone BEFORE you started drinking - don't do it. You'll save yourself a ton of trouble."

Now, fifty plus years later, I am thankful for the bit of wisdom. In enabled me to dodge so much trouble and drama.

If you meet someone, and you're drinking or have been drinking, just wait until tomorrow. If it was the alcohol, the attraction won't be there or you'll have a clearer understanding of why it's a bad idea. If the attraction is still there and the desire is still there, then you can always call them and make arrangements.
 
Update on Ranger Boy
All of this resonates with me. I’ve probably chosen paths that are much more complicated than the average person would be willing to navigate and it’s always been crucial that I do it in a way that is within my rules/guidelines for myself and relationships. They’re not arbitrary and I choose them because they’re the foundation that keeps things from toppling in my life. Sex and emotions are complicated enough. I don’t want to make rash decisions that I’ll regret or will bring drama without enough benefit.

I’ve definitely had people be surprised and say something along the lines of, “so you’re ok with a, b, and c but f is where you draw the line?” Yes. Hell, yes. My boundaries aren’t necessarily other people’s, but they work for me. Until maybe I change them 😂 But sober and with careful thought and intent.

Update on The Librarian
I love this. I think it’s one of the best parts of having many people you love in your life. They each appreciate different things and help make you feel appreciated as a whole person.

And I notice when others mention I adore things about them that they’ve always viewed as faults, or quirks at best. I tend to enjoy almost all the things about someone I love and I really like celebrating what I find unique.

I also think there’s often an element of complacency in long term, every day relationships. It’s not necessarily or always a bad thing, but other fulfilling relationships can highlight things that get otherwise overlooked/neglected and bring new life and joy into them. And that can benefit every single person you’re involved with because it makes you feel seen and valued. Sometimes (and ideally often) it even sparks renewed interest and appreciation with your long term partners. You feel better about yourself. They might see you in a light they never have or that got obscured for a while. Win win when this happens.
 
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Wow, this thread is a rollercoaster of emotions!
I find it wonderful and beautifull that you manage to find love for so many people in your life. I also find it admirable how much care you take for the people around you. I am very happy this provides you in turn with love and sexual satisfaction, and on tha same time I feel sorry that it is such a struggle sometimes. This thread reads like a page Turner, thank you for being so open in sharing all of your feelings!

Love,
Thom
 
Wow, this thread is a rollercoaster of emotions!
I find it wonderful and beautifull that you manage to find love for so many people in your life. I also find it admirable how much care you take for the people around you. I am very happy this provides you in turn with love and sexual satisfaction, and on tha same time I feel sorry that it is such a struggle sometimes. This thread reads like a page Turner, thank you for being so open in sharing all of your feelings!

Love,
Thom
It's been a wild ride.
I'm being stretched to love people in such different ways and degrees.
 
I have so many questions about what romantically separating means, but it sounds like your visceral reaction was that it might be a good thing even if it’s complicated. Growing and evolving can be both difficult and exhilarating.

I’m also curious if this shift or new dynamic was also lurking when you originally had some type of open relationship before kids? Or if something changed along the way?
 
Oh man... there are so many emotions packed in these last audio files... and I cannot pretend that I comprehent all the layers of love and sadness and exhilaration. But I will send you all the hugs and love. And again, thank you for sonopenly sharing a life I can only dream of!
Love,
Thom
 
I think a lot of people here are just dancing around the issue. They are trying to be nice and helpful and so sweet. But, you need a truth speaker. Someone who is seriously concerned about everyone involved.

The problem is that you don’t give blowjobs. I’m worried for those poor men and their unsucked dicks. :(
 
I think a lot of people here are just dancing around the issue. They are trying to be nice and helpful and so sweet. But, you need a truth speaker. Someone who is seriously concerned about everyone involved.

The problem is that you don’t give blowjobs. I’m worried for those poor men and their unsucked dicks. :(
Not everything is about dick sucking 🙄
 
I think a lot of people here are just dancing around the issue. They are trying to be nice and helpful and so sweet. But, you need a truth speaker. Someone who is seriously concerned about everyone involved.

The problem is that you don’t give blowjobs. I’m worried for those poor men and their unsucked dicks. :(
I fell off the couch laughing at this.
You're not wrong
 
Mmhm.
Sure sure
I think you’re obsessed with your penis. Just my two cents.

This is a well-known fact.

I fell off the couch laughing at this.
You're not wrong

Right!? That poor librarian. It’s sad because one day you’ll walk in and he will be fucking a vacuum and you’ll have no one to blame but yourself.


Not everything is about dick sucking 🙄

Mostly incorrect. But this is! Even Aussie agrees with me.
 
This is a well-known fact.
it’s not hard to be self aware when your world revolves around your penis.
Right!? That poor librarian. It’s sad because one day you’ll walk in and he will be fucking a vacuum and you’ll have no one to blame but yourself.
Is this something you have experience with? Story time?
Mostly incorrect. But this is! Even Aussie agrees with me.
I saw. That’s because Aussie is able to think with something other than her genitals :)
 
Right!? That poor librarian. It’s sad because one day you’ll walk in and he will be fucking a vacuum and you’ll have no one to blame but yourself.

His lucky day. Mrs Claus got him a vacuum for Christmas 🤫 @Lord Pmann
 

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I have to give a shout out to Mr. Aussie tonight.

We had a fantastic discussion about my career and the future and realized just how much of a partner I have in him in this regard. He and I have worked together for almost our entire marriage in one form or another and so we have a lot of deep overlap in experience and expertise. I've branched out and taken on some new projects recently that have broadened my understanding of how things work and he is uniquely positioned to understand a lot of what that means.

Right now we're both really trying to figure out what we want out of life and our careers. I'm definitely the "high achiever" and the only reason for that is because I choose to be. There's a lot of consequences that come with that choice, especially when it comes to every day life and responsibilities. I'm playing with the way I work and how much time I dedicate to what, etc. We've "leapfrogged" each other in our careers and right now it's my turn.

Mr. Aussie just spent the last few hours listening to me and helping me follow my curiosity around about what I want to do "next" (more of an "and", as I'm ready to do something more, and something different in addition to my current work). I'm sort of following my intuition here because I've accidentally stumbled into places I actually didn't expect to land at and so I'm just synthesizing what I can trying to figure out how I can help. Mr. Aussie knows just what questions to ask me to help me get clear about myself and my goals and I freaking appreciate that part of our relationship so much. Our primary commitment to each other is to always be improving and to help each other in those endeavors. Sometimes it's hard to see both the work he's putting into himself, and the attempts to help me. I'm so grateful for not only the times that I can see it; I'm grateful to be able to appreciate it.

There's something pretty freaking special about having people in your life who know you well.
 
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