Comments on the Updated Stickies!

[A Desert Rose]

Thank you. I knew you had it in you, after all those were the rules you set.

But now that I have had time to mull this over, I am not so sure I will be ignoring you. You set your rules, I'll set mine.

 

[NemoAlia]

Personally, I don't think that Moderators should have to do people's dirty (read: housekeeping) work for them. All the reasons that people have given before me are good ones, particularly the involuntary deletion of other people's posts. If I may point to a person whom I think sets a good example of self-editing, pierced_boy once deleted several of his own posts, while allowing the threads to remain intact. Although people wondered what his personal motivations were, at least there wasn't a lot of fighting involved!

 

[Lancecastor]

I have found that there tends to be a lot of unfounded conjecture in the BDSM Forum about the motivations, intention, and thinking of others.

As Art has pointed out, this is often a complete waste of time and is more likely to result in wrong conclusions and hard feelings , especially with those who feel emotionally invested in a topic or another.

I generally try to stick to telling people how I feel about a topic of discussion, versus trying to figure out what they are thinking.

In situations where a seemingly aggressive stance or tone is taken by someone in a discussion and they change their position without any apparent logical reason , I generally first point out the inconsistencies and take them as evidence of emotional investment and/or lack of logic in the argument if there is no meaningful reply on topic.

This pattern also signals to me on the face of it that:

1. the actual discussion is over, as it is going nowhere without clarity of reason, and

2. many times, the person is simply showing signals of the desire to engage in a flame fight, regardless of whether the "invitation" is passive or direct in form.

A few cheap shots are expected on a BB; if another persists with unsolicited ad hominems, I then choose to either ignore or bury them (usually, though not always, with humour) on a case by case basis.

Editing is a useful tool. I use it to correct spelling, adjust syntax to better reflect my meaning and to remove posts either to suit my purposes or to withdraw from a discussion where people become overly emotionally invested and/or just wierd. My motivation and character have been questioned when I do this, which leads me to go through the whole cycle (above) of wondering who these people are that can so quickly tell me what they think I think, but are unable or unwilling to tell me their position on an issue. More often than not, I just laugh. No skin off my nose.

In terms of Comments on The New Improved Sticky, I stand by my repeated suggestions and position that a more thorough FAQ with links to Netiquette would be helpful to all, as we might then be "singing from the same page".

Cheers;

Lance

 

[A Desert Rose]

~smiling~ I love that you can't give me up......I won't be giving you up either.

I don't want to fight with you, hon. I know you know better than that.

 

[A Desert Rose]

~smiling again~ You're funny. You can edit me out of your posts all you like. But I know what you wrote.

I think you should let me curl up to that hot rod of yours while you keep writing and removing me from the pearls of wisdom you keep posting.

I know we would both like that......

 

[Lancecastor]

Another Classic thread, by request.