Control III

[UsuallyPresent]

I have to be willing before I can be accepting. For me it's just a half step in difference. "Willing" as his submissive means I already trust him and I am well past the point of negotiating. And safe words are a safety valve (imo), not a go to.

Agreed! It’s definitely a spectrum of responses, and I’d be hard pressed to come up with a realistic scenario outside pure horror where your willing-before-accepting would not be the normal case.

I think there is something in my subby brain that craves that loss of control. The ability to lean into whatever experience he wants to give me, guide me through... and yes, absolutely just fall into all the sensation and emotional responses and utter vulnerability. I think props/toys/ restraints etc all help create a setting for ease of letting go, surrendering. It's easier for me to let go in every way if I don't have to work so hard to manage myself. If I'm restrained I don't have to try to maintain a particular position. If I'm blindfolded I'm not distracted by my eyes. If I'm gagged, I don't have to worry about trying to stay quiet and my ability to plead and whine and negotiate is removed. All of these things are gifts he can give me. -snip-

It hits different people different ways, in my experience. Some prefer the toys and setting, others prefer what they find inside their minds, imagination, soul… neither is the eternal ‘right’ answer, just what’s working currently.

 

[cascadiabound]

Agreed! It’s definitely a spectrum of responses, and I’d be hard pressed to come up with a realistic scenario outside pure horror where your willing-before-accepting would not be the normal case.



It hits different people different ways, in my experience. Some prefer the toys and setting, others prefer what they find inside their minds, imagination, soul… neither is the eternal ‘right’ answer, just what’s working currently.

And what works best today is not necessarily what works best tomorrow. I certainly would not want that many physical controls all of the time or even most of the time, but it does create conditions which can be... useful on both sides of the slash.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

"…both sides of the slash"

oh, that’s funny! didn’t expect that turn of phrase! well played!

 

[cascadiabound]

Delicious.
From the lip biting, to the multiple attachment D rings, to her arms on stretch above her head...
yep...I'd love to be her. Anytime.

 

[gabriela_2003]