D/s and Depression/Anxiety

[shy slave]

Mood swings were always a part of my make up until stress overload caused clinical depression about 2.5 years ago.

I went to the gp who said I needed space, time away from work and to calm down. I was too busy to do any of that so continued onwards.
What a mistake.
I saw needing these things as failing at life. I took anti-depressants and thank the God who invented them. The first ones I took had no effect, the ones made me have wonderful hallucinations but were not helpful towards enabling me to function, then I took Effexor. They were perfect for me. I was able to function, work, live and not feel I was in the darkest of places.
This period of time between recognising I had a problem and finding the right tablets was over a period of months. During that time I had extreme paranoia, anxiety and too much sleep or not enough sleep. One second I was talking with people, the next I was convinced I needed to escape the situation or something terrible would happen. I had a month off work then after a few weeks had another three weeks off.
It was a slow process back. The worst time was when I decided that I was better and stopped taking the tablets. The paranoia, hearing things (my eyelids blinking for example) and anxiety rocketed within a few hours.
What a hell, it was a long journey back to the person I was.

I never went to see a counsellor, due to the type of people catalina has described. Sadly it seems there are more terrible than worthwhile cousellors out there.

I am not depressed now, but have low moments, I can recognise that they are part of overall life not a lead in to clinical depression.

In some ways having had depression has made me understand myself better.
Its left me unwilling to be in groups of people for long periods of time. The local munch lasts 3 hrs every month, I manage about 1.5 hrs before I want to leave. Work away days will see me off sick or unable to complete a day. Thats new behaviour, I used to enjoy group things and be able to have fun when there.

Life is always going to give a mix of good and bad times, its made me more empathetic to people who are stressed or depressed, but less empathetic to those people who constantly say they are depressed yet do not talk to anyone about it. Almost as if they are a victim without power.

Its hard to go and look for help, depression drains you of energy and sometimes you wonder if its your imagination and its just a bad day.

Its also scary to talk to people, it means trying to descirbe what is happening in your head when you feel devoid of words.

On low days I want to be close to Andante, yet when I had a low day and he was there i wanted to hide away so he did not have to see that part of me.

I am grateful he never saw me clinically depressed, yet I know he would have been supportive and caring.

The human mind is a bizarre thing

 

[catalina_francisco]

Maybe a useful bump for some.

 

[titmouse]

Maybe a useful bump for some.

Thank you.

 

[brioche]

Quite interesting.
I too am on the depression/anxiety bandwagon, and have been for a long time. Etoile, I can tell you that a great number of things are linked: depression, anxiety, panic disoders, phobias, anorexia, bulimia, irritiable bowel symdrome, firbromyalgia, and I think maybe rhematoid baseed arthritises. It was a long time ago that I read the list but I can check if it's something you're interested in. They're all on the same arm of the chromosome or something, it's theorized.
I found balance with a cocktail of meds, and I fine tune them as needed. I use a combination of Buspar, Celexa, and clonazepam, and sometimes I need more of one or the other than other times. It comes through knowing myself.
You can't solve a depression or anxiety problem through meds alone. I've been in cognitive behavioural therapy for depression (which I didn't finish), group therapy for OCD (I had tendencies) and now for social anxiety disorder. It's hard work but worth it.
One of the things I learned is you virtually never have JUST GAD or JUST panic disorder or JUST phobia, there's always aspects of different subgroupings in there, they're just sub-clinical. I went through 4 hours of testing to find out what mine were. Treating them through therapy is a much better solution than ANOTHER drug.
And also 66% of depression patients have anxiety disorder and vice versa so...

Please excuse any spelling mistakes, I'm adapting to a new keyboard because this laptop is a different make.

 

[graceanne]

Out of curiousity sakes crohns disease is linked to anxiety too. Crohns is genetic, but it's also environment. They have a set of identical twins, one has crohns, the other doesn't. They think that the way you deal with stress can make you more prone to crohns disease. A good majority of crohnies are like me, internalizers. In laymans terms that means that they pretend everything's fine even when somethings literally eating holes in them.

 

[FurryFury]

Out of curiousity sakes crohns disease is linked to anxiety too. Crohns is genetic, but it's also environment. They have a set of identical twins, one has crohns, the other doesn't. They think that the way you deal with stress can make you more prone to crohns disease. A good majority of crohnies are like me, internalizers. In laymans terms that means that they pretend everything's fine even when somethings literally eating holes in them.

My Dad had Crohns or at least that was one of many titles they gave what plagued him. It still hurts me to think that while he was sick, for most of his life, he was pretty much told it was he own fault because of how he dealt with stress and emotions.

In the last decade, the doctors thought it had more to do with a physiological cause.

He fought to live.

Whereas, after he died, my mother became so depressed she fought to die.

Ain't life strange?

Fury

 

[Netzach]

Out of curiousity sakes crohns disease is linked to anxiety too. Crohns is genetic, but it's also environment. They have a set of identical twins, one has crohns, the other doesn't. They think that the way you deal with stress can make you more prone to crohns disease. A good majority of crohnies are like me, internalizers. In laymans terms that means that they pretend everything's fine even when somethings literally eating holes in them.

Hm.

For all the noise and complaint you'd think I'd have iron gut.

 

[BiBunny]

Warning: long, feeling-sorry-for-myself rant ahead. Please move along if you don't feel like reading.

Thanks for the bump, cat. It's given me a lot to think about. Right now, life is just kicking my ass, and I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I've had social anxiety disorder (or social phobia, whatever you want to call it) probably all my life. There have been signs, at least, for as far back as I can remember. I have never been officially diagnosed, simply because it's not something I talk about, even with friends, much less some random doctor. I know what it is, though. My mother has it, and her mother has it. So I got the double whammy of nature and nurture right there.

Any depression that I have is secondary to this...this THING that lives inside me. If my life is on a mostly even keel, I'm not depressed. I doubt that my depression is chemical in nature; it's more likely a situational thing.

But, right now, I'm absolutely eaten up with both these things. The downward spiral that is my life right now started back in mid-October when I lost my job. The company laid off approximately half of its workers, so I know it was nothing against me personally. The same week that I lost my job, my show horse whom I'd had so much hope for came up lame at the trainer's. (It turns out that her case was not so bleak as it initially seemed, but I worry about her nonetheless.) It might not be a big deal to non-horsey people, but my horses are to me what most people's children are to them. About a month later, my Master released me. (Y'all may remember that thread. We're back together now, but it's been rocky, and I'm having my doubts about the whole thing.) I had finals and papers due at school right around the time that he did what he did. I managed to fail a class that I had an "A" in right before finals because I made an "F" on a paper. (For the record, I've been an A-B student my entire life.) To add insult to injury, I got a letter in the mail a couple of days ago saying I'd been dropped from my graduate program due to my deficient grades. I have gone over the school's policies and procedures, and it appears to me that I have been wrongly dropped, but I'm not sure. Classes started Thursday, and I have until this coming Thursday to get this whole mess sorted out and registered for classes. It wouldn't be a big deal if I didn't need the financial aid money to pay the bills that have been accruing since I lost my job. *Bangs head against the wall* It's like a vicious cycle around here.

I've had one job interview since I lost my previous job. I had to sit out in the parking lot for 20 minutes just trying to get up the nerve to go inside. Needless to say, I didn't impress anyone with my interview. I hold a bachelor's degree already, and I'm truly overqualified for a lot of the jobs I've been trying for. I know I could do these jobs well, but I can't get past the interview process. I should've gone to talk to the professor of the class I failed before final grades were in, explained to him that I've been having a rough time, and requested an "Incomplete" for the class. I was too scared of facing the man to do it, and now look where it's gotten me. I should've been in the Office of Graduate Studies this morning raising hell about their (apparent) wrongful dismissal of me from my master's program. Even the thought of picking up the phone to call and talk to someone about it makes me feel close to fainting. I have no idea how I'll ever get up the nerve to actually discuss it with someone.

Most of my problems I bring on myself. I really don't even have any friends to discuss things with because that's another hallmark of this THING. People who aren't social don't make friends. My girlfriend is the only person I really feel comfortable talking to, and she's not much better off than I am in the social phobia department.

My experiences with people have led me to believe that most of them are out to use me to suit their purposes and nothing else. I'm not sure if it's minor paranoia creeping in or what, but I'm to the point where I believe the same thing about my Master. The thought of trying to talk to him about it terrifies me, too, even though he's fully aware of this THING. This relationship is dragging me down, and I have no idea what to do to fix it. Perhaps if I weren't so afraid to stand up for myself, people might respect me more and use me less.

I also have horrible, debilitating migraines, which are most likely exacerbated, if not outright caused, by my phobia. I've been on several different antidepressants for the prevention of my headaches. None of them have helped either the migraines or the social anxiety/secondary depression. I don't think an antidepressant would be the way to go to treat the things that are wrong with me. I have strong pain medication that I take when my headaches finally become unbearable. Most of these meds put normal people to sleep. I'm wound so tightly that I become mellow and maybe even normal when I take them. I can interact with people with no discomfort because they relax me. I never take them unless I'm in pain, however. I love the way they make me feel, like I have control over my problem, but I know that getting addicted to painkillers would just increase my problem(s) in the long run.

Speaking of my pain meds, I think one of the saddest testaments to my issues is this one. A couple of summers ago, I worked in a restaurant. I would pull double shifts, lunch and dinner, because I needed the money. I hated it with a passion, but it was a job. During the course of that summer, I fell off a horse and dislocated my shoulder and bruised a kidney. I got some handy-dandy meds for that, too. I could make it through lunch without meds, but when dinnertime rolled around, the shoulder was so stiff, and there was so much pain through my core from the bruised kidney that I often had to take a pill to get me through. I fly when I take the things, honestly. I'm everything I want to be--friendly, warm, funny, outgoing, not scared shitless of talking to people. On the nights that I took the medication, I'd make a whole wad of tips. The nights that I could handle the pain and not take a pill, I'd make a couple of dollars. The realization that people only liked me when I was "high," so to speak, was a sobering one, indeed. Once again, I don't take these things on a regular basis, but, oh, how I wish I could.

I know that my fear is totally irrational. I sometimes find myself sitting out in parking lots, just talking myself into going in Wal-Mart or places like that. I know exactly how ridiculous it is. I hardly go anywhere that's not absolutely necessary. People think I'm rude and unfriendly, an all-around bitch. That's not true. I'm just scared to death. I can't do small talk, not at all. The irony of this is that it has nothing to do with just being in front of people. I've shown horses since I was 11 years old, and I never really struggled with any kind of stage fright. I can give public speeches with no problem as long as I have notes in front of me and the audience is far enough away that I can't really make out individual faces. It's the social interaction that I can't deal with.

Right now, I have so many things going on (and most of them are my own fault) that I've sunken into a depression. I have no idea how to fix these things. It's embarrassing to be 23 years old with a college degree and still having to have your parents give you money. I'd do anything to change it, but I have no idea how to anymore. There are multiple issues, and I don't know where to start. I've toyed with the idea of going to see a psychiatrist in the area, but I don't know who's good and who isn't.

Ok, I'm sorry about all that. Heck, it helped some just to get it out there. Please don't think I'm just trolling for pity. I just wanted to share my experiences, and somewhere along the line, it kind of turned into my own little venting party. Once again, I apologize, and carry on with the thread!

 

[MasterPhoenix]

KEep your head up, bunny...

 

[graceanne]

Hm.

For all the noise and complaint you'd think I'd have iron gut.

LOL Well, their are always exceptions to the rule.

 

[graceanne]

Warning: long, feeling-sorry-for-myself rant ahead. Please move along if you don't feel like reading.

Sounds like you needed to vent. *hugs*

 

[BiBunny]

Sounds like you needed to vent. *hugs*

Yes, I did. Thanks for letting me!

 

[Ebonyfire]

When I am depressed, I become a hermit. I only go to work and come home. I do not answer phones, talk/deal to subs or any of my friends, or even post on the computer. All I do is lie low and watch my favorite movies on TV while holed up in my bedroom with the door closed.

It works for me.

Eb

 

[catalina_francisco]

Yes, I did. Thanks for letting me!

Vent away. As you know, many of us agree with your suspicions about the intentions of your Master and that it is not a healthy relationship for you....as for the rest, I would encourage you to go to any psych and if they are not good, go to another. Social phobias can be crippling as you know...getting support can be empowering. It is not unusual to use unprescribed medications (or abuse prescribed ones) and at times alcohol to self medicate these conditions and yet with the right support you can learn how to do it without them. I am not talking through my hat as it is something I have been trying to help my son with all his life, and finally for the past year we have had his problems validated and received support from a whole team of people to help support, guide and socialise him into a hopefully new, independent and fully functioning life. It is a long road, but even though some would think the progress to date is small, for him and us it is huge and well worth all the stumblings, worry, and consistency.

Catalina

 

[BiBunny]

Vent away. As you know, many of us agree with your suspicions about the intentions of your Master and that it is not a healthy relationship for you....as for the rest, I would encourage you to go to any psych and if they are not good, go to another. Social phobias can be crippling as you know...getting support can be empowering. It is not unusual to use unprescribed medications (or abuse prescribed ones) and at times alcohol to self medicate these conditions and yet with the right support you can learn how to do it without them. I am not talking through my hat as it is something I have been trying to help my son with all his life, and finally for the past year we have had his problems validated and received support from a whole team of people to help support, guide and socialise him into a hopefully new, independent and fully functioning life. It is a long road, but even though some would think the progress to date is small, for him and us it is huge and well worth all the stumblings, worry, and consistency.

Catalina

Thank you, cat. I really do appreciate it. The problem with going to see a psychologist/psychiatrist is the same problem I have with everything else, I suppose. It scares me. I just get so mad at myself sometimes. It really helps to know that there are people who do understand and don't just think I'm abnormal, so to speak. Would you mind elaborating about what you (and others) have done for your son? (You can PM me if you don't want to post it in the thread.)

As for my relationship with my Master...I just don't know about that anymore. I hope that my beginning to see him as immature and selfish is due to my current issues, but I'm not sure. Sometimes I feel like I give and give and give and receive nothing in return. Like I said, though, the thought of confronting it is daunting to me. I do so much better with the written word than the spoken word, but it seems cowardly to just fire off an email, you know? I think I should sit down and talk to him, but I know how I get. I'll become upset and forget half of what I was going to say.

Ever feel like you just can't win?

 

[brioche]

Vent away. As you know, many of us agree with your suspicions about the intentions of your Master and that it is not a healthy relationship for you....as for the rest, I would encourage you to go to any psych and if they are not good, go to another. Social phobias can be crippling as you know...getting support can be empowering. It is not unusual to use unprescribed medications (or abuse prescribed ones) and at times alcohol to self medicate these conditions and yet with the right support you can learn how to do it without them. I am not talking through my hat as it is something I have been trying to help my son with all his life, and finally for the past year we have had his problems validated and received support from a whole team of people to help support, guide and socialise him into a hopefully new, independent and fully functioning life. It is a long road, but even though some would think the progress to date is small, for him and us it is huge and well worth all the stumblings, worry, and consistency.

Catalina

I totally agree with Cat on this, and I do know how hard it is, because I am going through it now. Two of my current exposure rules are making eye contact with people casually and going into restaurants instead of using the drive through windows. This is hard for me. I actually have this scheduled out - when I'll do it, and than they ask whether I did it - every week.
You're in a bad place and you need to see someone ASAP.
Next: You have depression and anxiety disorder. When I was in university, and still now, I was able to get concessions because I had a disability, just like someone with ADHD or a learning disability. I still had to do the work, but someone took notes for me because I had trouble concentrating, for example, and because several concurrent deadlines exhaust what reserves I have, I was able to negotiate deadlines with instructors when I needed more space. The law here in Canada is that no reasonable accommodation for someone with a disability can be denied.
There should be somewhere in your university for people with learning disabilities. I suggest you go and tell them your story. You are at that point where doing things is hard, but once your disability has been verified they can advocate for you. You won't be doing this alone. I'm not sure exactly what the law is there, but mostly they aren't that different. It's worth a try. The website of your uni might have information on this.
I remember what it's like to not have the capacity to argue, to be too exhausted and depressed to do much, but you need to do what you can, sweets. We are all here for you, and if you need anything, whether it's a question or more venting, feel free to PM me. I've been through it all before, and support is an important part of you getting well.

 

[Etoile]

Next: You have depression and anxiety disorder. When I was in university, and still now, I was able to get concessions because I had a disability, just like someone with ADHD or a learning disability. I still had to do the work, but someone took notes for me because I had trouble concentrating, for example, and because several concurrent deadlines exhaust what reserves I have, I was able to negotiate deadlines with instructors when I needed more space. The law here in Canada is that no reasonable accommodation for someone with a disability can be denied.

Wow, in the U.S. only ADHD is recognized - depression and anxiety are considered mental illnesses, but not disabilities. Or at least I've never heard of accommodations for them, and I've sat in on more than a few EEO-type meetings where mental disorders have been discussed. Schizophrenia counts, anxiety does not, that sort of thing. On to the federal form about "self reporting of handicaps" you can put down #92 which is "mental or emotional illness with a history of treatment for mental or emotional problems" but depression and anxiety disorder are almost never considered in that category. They may legally be included, but the societal stigma is such that most people would not self-report them or ask for accommodations.

In fact, it used to be hard to get accommodations for ADHD, too. I was diagnosed back in 1987, and from then until 1995 my mother tried to get the school system to give me reasonable accommodations for it. She finally succeeded, and I was given additional time on tests, permission to use a computer for essay tests (had to go to the library for that, usually), and things like that. The computer bit was because I type MUCH faster than I write. When I would write out an essay test, sentences wouldn't read clearly because my brain was already way ahead of my hand. Typing enabled me to make more sense, proving that I really did know the material.

Anyway, I have anxiety disorder too, and it's more disabling than my depression, which is pretty well-controlled by Wellbutrin. Celexa keeps me from being a complete and total anxious wreck, without it I go nuts, but I still have a low level of anxiety at all times.

Not D/s related I guess...just talkin' about myself.

 

[brioche]

Wow, in the U.S. only ADHD is recognized - depression and anxiety are considered mental illnesses, but not disabilities. Or at least I've never heard of accommodations for them, and I've sat in on more than a few EEO-type meetings where mental disorders have been discussed. Schizophrenia counts, anxiety does not, that sort of thing. On to the federal form about "self reporting of handicaps" you can put down #92 which is "mental or emotional illness with a history of treatment for mental or emotional problems" but depression and anxiety disorder are almost never considered in that category. They may legally be included, but the societal stigma is such that most people would not self-report them or ask for accommodations.

In fact, it used to be hard to get accommodations for ADHD, too. I was diagnosed back in 1987, and from then until 1995 my mother tried to get the school system to give me reasonable accommodations for it. She finally succeeded, and I was given additional time on tests, permission to use a computer for essay tests (had to go to the library for that, usually), and things like that. The computer bit was because I type MUCH faster than I write. When I would write out an essay test, sentences wouldn't read clearly because my brain was already way ahead of my hand. Typing enabled me to make more sense, proving that I really did know the material.

Anyway, I have anxiety disorder too, and it's more disabling than my depression, which is pretty well-controlled by Wellbutrin. Celexa keeps me from being a complete and total anxious wreck, without it I go nuts, but I still have a low level of anxiety at all times.

Not D/s related I guess...just talkin' about myself.

I didn't get anything in school. It wasn't until university that I got the accommodations, and it was because I went in and asked about them. When I got to university, I had already been labelled as chronic, as in "this isn't gonna go away ever." I relapse within a year if I go off the meds, and that's just the depression. The anxiety's a whole new ball game.
Chronic depression and anxiety disorder are a disability in that they affect your life in a myriad of ways. In fact, many of them are the same as ADHD.
My accommodations also included writing tests and exams in a room with no more than five other people and time and a half for essay format tests.
I learned how to advocate for myself, and I applied to teacher's college telling them I had a disability. In fact, my personal statement was all about how my experiences would make me a better teacher, and if they didn't see that, then that was unfortunate.
I don't tell everyone or anything, but it's not a huge secret in my life.
I think it's quite possible that the accommodations are available, but the only way Bibunny can find out is to ask. No one comes out and tells you, because it's expensive.

 

[BiBunny]

Bumping this thread up because I have a question. How does one go about finding a good therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist? My bachelor's degree is in psychology--I should know the answer, but I don't. Do you just go through the Yellow Pages and see which person can make the earliest appointment to see you? Should I ask some of my old psych professors who they'd recommend? (Not so sure this is a hot idea since a number of them are stuck on "my way is the only right way.") Do some kind of long, complicated voodoo ritual and hope that the correct name materializes out of thin air? (Ok, that's stretching it.)

I'm just curious because I've gotten all the school issues sorted out now. I'm back in school, taking classes, and benefitting from that financial aid check. I've decided that it's time I do something about my problem. It's not gone away on its own in 23 years, so it's not really likely to do it now. Any help would be appreciated!

 

[catalina_francisco]

Bumping this thread up because I have a question. How does one go about finding a good therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist? My bachelor's degree is in psychology--I should know the answer, but I don't. Do you just go through the Yellow Pages and see which person can make the earliest appointment to see you? Should I ask some of my old psych professors who they'd recommend? (Not so sure this is a hot idea since a number of them are stuck on "my way is the only right way.") Do some kind of long, complicated voodoo ritual and hope that the correct name materializes out of thin air? (Ok, that's stretching it.)

I'm just curious because I've gotten all the school issues sorted out now. I'm back in school, taking classes, and benefitting from that financial aid check. I've decided that it's time I do something about my problem. It's not gone away on its own in 23 years, so it's not really likely to do it now. Any help would be appreciated!

Congrats on getting all the other shit sorted out, and so quickly!! As to having a psyche degree meaning you should know, it is the same as people who think anyone who is a therapist/counsellor has no right to have problems in their own lives etc...not realistic. Which ever way you go about finding the right therapist for you, a lot of it is going to be up to how you feel they connect with you and whether they are good for you...of course that also may take a few appointments to get a realistic view unless you have an immediate personality clash with them. The reason it will be up to you is as you probably realise, who is right for someone else may not suit you because we are all unique. If you are going to ask around though, perhaps it is wise to ask for recommendations of therapists who have specialised or extensive experience in the areas you think are needed, and perhaps even a women's health centre may be able to provide a referral list. Most of all you need to feel comfortable with them and be able to trust enough to talk openly without fear of judgement or indifference. Good luck with it as the resluts can be fantastic.

Catalina

 

[Toxn]

This thread is really interesting to me. I’v been dealing with depression since middle school, im 22 now. Iv spent a very long time in therapy and managed to work out a lot of my problems but much remains to be solved. I don’t experience that numbing depression or the empty depression i once used to and now i rarely get depressed and when i do there is usually a big trigger (brake ups, ect).

I was blessed with (in my opinion) one of the best shrinks in the world but i am aware of so many bad ones out there. I think the best advice i can give to someone who is thinking about going into therapy is find one that fits you and don’t be afraid to look around.

Also i spent a bit of time on Effexor and i couldn’t orgasm while i was on it. A fact that thoroughly pissed off the girl i was with. Its rough veebee1 but its for the best if the medication helps you. I see meds as a temporary crutch...it “can” put you in a more stable and sometimes happier frame of mind that may give you a better prospective on your life and help you realize what needs to be changed. (This isn’t true for all i have a friend who is manic-depressive and will probably need to be medicated for the rest of his life).

One question iv allays had is does the state of mind create the chemical imbalance or does the chemical imbalance create the state of mind.

 

[Etoile]

How does one go about finding a good therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist? My bachelor's degree is in psychology--I should know the answer, but I don't. Do you just go through the Yellow Pages and see which person can make the earliest appointment to see you?

Rather than the Yellow Pages, I would say your insurance provider's listing, if you have that type of plan.

I was lucky and there was somebody in the Kink-Aware Professionals list - at www.ncsfreedom.org - who is local to me. I had my first appointment with her last Thursday and I think it's going to go well. She didn't jump when I said I had two partners, she didn't jump when I said dominant and submissive, she doesn't care about sexual orientation...I think it's going to be good. I see her again on Thursday (my birthday) although I didn't have time this weekend to buy the book she said I should get.

 

[Juggle5]

Another thing to consider -- Food Sensitivity

Interesting thread, even if it is a bit of a downer. Mild chronic depression runs in my family, so that's probably got something to do with the problem I describe here. Back in the 70's I discovered that I had a food sensitivity to chicken. (Mostly I call it a food allergy but it's not a true allergy, no swelling or anything like that.) The symptoms are deep depression -- but it doesn't start until 24 to 36 hours after I've eaten the food. My wife says it puts me in a "fowl" mood. For three days, every major decision I've made has been wrong. I'm worthless because I haven't lived up to my capabilites, etc. etc.... Once the food had cleared from my system, my mood goes back to normal. Now, what happens if someone does not know they have a sensitivity to some food they eat every three days? Constant deep depression.

I found this out because of an article by Theron Randolp in a health magazine. It said that some allergies behave like addictions, in that whatever it is you are sensitive to is something you eat at least every three days, is something you get unreasonably upset about if you can't get it, and it tends to be one of your favorite foods. After I read the article, I thought, "That's how I react to milk." The test was do without the food for one week, and then eat some of it. Supposedly, you would get a major reaction during the withdrawal period, as if it were an addiction. That didn't happen with the milk, but my constant headaches went away. The milk reaction is another 24-to-36 hour delay. About two years later, these unexplainable mood swings got me to thinking, so I started keeping track of what I ate. The depressed periods tended to coincide with eating chicken.

So, be aware of what you eat, try to do without your favorite foods (one at a time please) for a week, and see if you can relate your depression to food. Probably you won't, but it's worth a try.

Juggle5

 

[lil_slave_rose]

Interesting thread, even if it is a bit of a downer. Mild chronic depression runs in my family, so that's probably got something to do with the problem I describe here. Back in the 70's I discovered that I had a food sensitivity to chicken. (Mostly I call it a food allergy but it's not a true allergy, no swelling or anything like that.) The symptoms are deep depression -- but it doesn't start until 24 to 36 hours after I've eaten the food. My wife says it puts me in a "fowl" mood. For three days, every major decision I've made has been wrong. I'm worthless because I haven't lived up to my capabilites, etc. etc.... Once the food had cleared from my system, my mood goes back to normal. Now, what happens if someone does not know they have a sensitivity to some food they eat every three days? Constant deep depression.

I found this out because of an article by Theron Randolp in a health magazine. It said that some allergies behave like addictions, in that whatever it is you are sensitive to is something you eat at least every three days, is something you get unreasonably upset about if you can't get it, and it tends to be one of your favorite foods. After I read the article, I thought, "That's how I react to milk." The test was do without the food for one week, and then eat some of it. Supposedly, you would get a major reaction during the withdrawal period, as if it were an addiction. That didn't happen with the milk, but my constant headaches went away. The milk reaction is another 24-to-36 hour delay. About two years later, these unexplainable mood swings got me to thinking, so I started keeping track of what I ate. The depressed periods tended to coincide with eating chicken.

So, be aware of what you eat, try to do without your favorite foods (one at a time please) for a week, and see if you can relate your depression to food. Probably you won't, but it's worth a try.

Juggle5

hmm..interesting, but it seems after 3 days the chicken or whatever food would be out of your body...but it is interesting, i've just never heard of anything like that before...thanks for sharing. i know that my depression is a chemical imbalance in my brain, though i have yet to find an anti-depressant that helps. prozac did, but then it became ineffective after a few months *shrugs* i've only tried 3 different types the one i'm on now i think might work, if i could remember to take it every day

 

[Inconsequential]

I feel like this makes me a bad sub. I don't really think that's true - Daddy has forgiven me for it, and eir opinion is the only one that really matters to me - but I worry about things like this. My main question is: How do any of you all - subs and doms alike - deal with depression and anxiety, either your own or your partner's?

I don't feel like this makes you a bad sub, or a bad anything. ~Everyone~ even Dom/mes go thru depression at times. It's a natural part of human life, no matter what lifestyle you're into. A friend of Mine right now is in an apathetic funk, it doesn't make her not want sex, or play, or any of it, she just doesn't care about it anymore. It's normal it happens now and then.
The way I deal with it is slowly, and usually it's a temporary thing anyway. There's a trigger point to it, and once you can figure out what caused it, you can figure out what would remedy it. Sometimes it just takes time, sometimes it takes a good hard session, sometimes it's as simple as an open forum discussion. Don't let it ~Keep~ you down. Working it out together thru communication will help more than you can ever ever ever know. Communication will also give you ways to have them help you thru it, even when you don't ~feel~ like talking about it.

Good luck, I hope you get out of your funk soon.