Dear X,

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Los Angeles,

You were fantastic. Hope to see you again some day.

Cheers,

Pmann

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear American Gal,

Don't let him take your son back east.

I know he's worn you down, and then some, but you will regret letting him do that for the rest of you life.

Yours,

Plenty more support if you need it Litster.

 

[Eilan]

Dear Family Member,

Yeah, I just unfriended and then blocked you, your husband, and your dogs (!!) on Facebook. The incessant whining about how unfair life is and how everyone's out to bring you down I could deal with. The pictures of aborted fetuses, however, got really old in a hurry.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Pmann,

I would order my steak well done if it cost $8 or $800, every single time.

Yours,
S

PS. I miss your face. Declaration enough?

Someone needs to show you how to eat meat. That person should be me.

PS: Indeed.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Oh believe me, hubby has tried for 14 years. I drive him insane with my need for no pink at all in my meat.

Your head must be elsewhere. I set you up with "I need to teach you how to eat meat" and you just let that go by????

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Communication,

Where have you been all my life?

Sincerely,

Adult Pmann

 

[imemkay]

Dear Still twitching eyelid,

Fuck off already! I'm ready to cut you off.

Thanks,
Really, really over you

Dear Twitchy,

Possible causes include:
Too much caffeine, stress, anxiety or alcohol and
Not enough restful sleep.

Possible remedies include:
Cutting back on stimulants and stress,
Try to get some quality rest,
Also, try a warm compress

Hoping it stops soon!

 

[Sarojaede]

Dear TPK,

Move the fuck to the EC and out of our community already so that you will stop fucking with our children's opportunities that are being provided by our PT.

Sincerely,

Me

 

[NightL]

Thanks! I am pretty sure it's stress/anxiety and maybe lack of sleep. It's been about 4-5 days now... I'm so over it!

now I was up late last night and saw you posted "Today, 01:46 AM" - and as soon as I saw your twitchy eyelid post I thought - bet lack of sleep is contributing.

Been there many times with the twitchy eye...

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Eye Twitcher,

I have a pretty early meeting, so maybe you can get to bed early.

Sincerely,

Pmunn

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Digit Inserting Doctor,

Please be gentle.

Yours,

You can never have too much lube Litster.

 

[imemkay]

Dear Soon To Be Probed Litster,

Advice I offer my patients? Don't forget to breathe. It will be over before you know it. Do you need me to hold your hand?

Confident it won't be so bad Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Soon To Be Probed Litster,

Advice I offer my patients? Don't forget to breathe. It will be over before you know it. Do you need me to hold your hand?

Confident it won't be so bad Litster

Dear Confidence-Conveying, Hand-Holding Litster.

Are you advising, '....And Breathe....'? Actually that does sound familiar and once again proves to be excellent advice.

Thank you again for your support.

Yours,

Thankful that my walnut is still a walnut Litster.

 

[imemkay]

Dear Confidence-Conveying, Hand-Holding Litster.

Are you advising, '....And Breathe....'? Actually that does sound familiar and once again proves to be excellent advice.

Thank you again for your support.

Yours,

Thankful that my walnut is still a walnut Litster.

Dear Thankful Litster,

You're very welcome! Excellent advice from a very wise friend of mine. You look after me, I look after you!

I don't think I'll ever look at walnuts the same way again, however.

Yours,
Craving a Cashew Litster

 

[imemkay]

Dear Companies that use Robocalls:

You should probably choose someone with a friendly voice. That last one sounded like a rapist or serial killer. It legitimately frightened me!

Now checking the locks on all my windows Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Companies that use Robocalls:

You should probably choose someone with a friendly voice. That last one sounded like a rapist or serial killer. It legitimately frightened me!

Now checking the locks on all my windows Litster

Dear lock checking Litster,

Psychotic robocallers are just lonely and miss contact with their own kind.

You can help by calling up an automated call handling service on another phone and let the two drive each other into their own call handling romance.

Yours,

Matchmaking for telecoms AIs Litster.

 

[imemkay]

Dear lock checking Litster,

Psychotic robocallers are just lonely and miss contact with their own kind.

You can help by calling up an automated call handling service on another phone and let the two drive each other into their own call handling romance.

Yours,

Matchmaking for telecoms AIs Litster.

Dear Matchmaker,

It's nice you want to help the lonely Robocallers. I'm curious, however, do your matchmaking skills carry over to humans? I could really use some help.. my track record is not the best!

Yours,
Guilty of making poor choices Litster

 

[EbersMoll]

Dear Matchmaker,

It's nice you want to help the lonely Robocallers. I'm curious, however, do your matchmaking skills carry over to humans? I could really use some help.. my track record is not the best!

Yours,
Guilty of making poor choices Litster

Dear Understandably Self-critical, though far from guilty, Litster,

I am always very happy to help others, whom themselves, help others.

Yours,

Your friend, Litster.

 

[bobsgirl]

Dear X,
I remember writing months ago that it didn't feel like we were finished. I see I was right. I also know that I don't trust you as far as I can throw you.

Still the same old arrogant SOB. Nice to know some things are a constant.

Love, me

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear teleconference phone jackass,

Shut the fuck up. If you were important enough to run the call, they would have asked you to. I'm sure your dick is huge--now shut your yap hole so the rest of us can hear the people who actually know how to navigate this database. Thanks so much.

Deep voiced man with the seriously hot Southern accent--please talk as much as you want.

sincerely,
short fused employee of the devil

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Eye Twitching Lister,

You have me your eye twitching disease.

I'm a trooper though. And I won't complain.

Sincerely,

Twitching Twat

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear you,

How odd because after 6 days of non-stop twitch, I have not had a single twitch so far today.

Hmm... It's a sign.

Anyway, Good luck with that,
Twitch Free Me

Don't get cocky. I can make that twitch come back with two words. I'm just kidding of course, as I'd never do that.

Edit: And it's not a sign, fucker.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear iPhone autocorrect,

That was not supposed to say prune. *squint*

Sincerely,
Annoyed but amused

Hehe. I know what you mean. That autocorrect makes me look so stupid.

So I guessed when you messaged me earlier about "alan six" that was autocorrect huh?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Rested Prune,

You don't want me going away more often and you know it.

Sincerely,

Traveling Prune

 

[Lord Pmann]

Oh sweety, it's not auto correct that makes you look silly. *runs*

Oh? I think it is the autocorrecties. Otherwise I'm dignified.

*does shuffle*