help me think this through

[KimGordon67]

I hope it’s OK I started another account to post this question. I’m not exactly proud of this. So I may have an opportunity to be sb to a sd. I’m young, and I can and want to cash out on my body for a year or two while I still look like your little sister. Why not? It’s just sex and sex is a cinch. I know it’s wrong, but it’s my decision, I’m adulting now I’m hoping to get help thinking this through.

COVID has been really hard on me and anyone my age. No real skills, education not complete, our already crappy jobs wiped out. Even without COVID, what’s a girl to do with little (or no) bankable skills? Wait tables at min wage and beg for a tip? Prior to COVID, we had sex several times. He’s almost 40 years older than me. His tastes are not hard for me to handle. Light bondage, spanking, ropes, cuffs, collars, leash, floggers, little girl dress-up. Easy peasy. Last time we met, he said something about getting me a place near him (same country, other side) and I would be his live-near play-thing. I would have a credit card and spending account. Apparently, he has a contract for me. I’ll be joining another girl he has right now, I’m going to guess we’ll be roommates?

My thoughts are my safety. I’m not exactly proud of this so I don’t want to tell anyone. I live at home, how do I tell my parents I’ll be disappearing for a year or so? Boyfriend? Friends? How do I explain my disappearance? I’m midway through college but the semester is done, trying to think through taking a break for only one year to make some really good tax free money. Is this even legal (USA)? Did I miss anything?

Everyone else has put up the big red flashing danger signs, so I don't need to. The only thing I have to add here is that no amount of money is worth being unhappy for. Nothing that you describe about the situation you'd be going into sounds like it would make you happy. I get the situation with your brother, but I don't believe that either he or your parents would want you to be unhappy just to provide money for the family.
The money =/= happiness equation is something that I do know from experience. I walked away from a marriage that would have provided me with financial ease to live along with a massive mortgage that I can barely pay. I'm very happy, and don't regret doing that for a second.

I would also suggest getting some advice from actual sex workers. Is there a sex workers collective or other similar organisation in your area? They will know all the things to look out for. This situation does have a bazillion red flags, but they'll be able to tell you based on their actual experience what those are. I would especially recommend this if, for whatever reason, you decide to go through with this.

ETA: Acktion makes some good points. If you're needing extra cash, set up an OnlyFans or do something that's a bit less all encompassing. There's nothing to be ashamed of - plenty of perfectly respectable citizens engage in various forms of sex work, and you're right, it's an easy way to make money when you're young if you not doing things that you think are vile. (Personally, it wasn't something that I could have ever done, but I know plenty of people who have.)

 

[Acktion]

This is what I meant when I said that you probably don’t know everything about his tastes and kink level.
When you are far from friends and family, living on his expense in a place he provides, you are way more vulnerable to requests that go way beyond what you are ok with.
Not being able to talk about what is going on with people you know and trust and not having funds enough to leave, stay in a hotel room and/or travel home are things that increase the risk that this morphs into something you feel you have to agree to even if it is way beyond what you are ok with.

I didn’t intend to tell you that you are stupid. Just pointing out things that would need handling. I don’ think this is something that can be done safely, so you would have to look at the problematic stuff and find ways to mitigate the risk as far as possible.
Having money enough to bug out at any time for example, would be something that is helpful in most situations and especially in riskier situations.

 

[77fbird400]

Showing me he's rich?

The poster you're responding to is fairly good at sounding like he knows what he's talking about. Having seen a bit of his posts in other place, I don't think this is a situation he's actually familiar with, even though he sounds like he is.

Correct. I have never paid for sex.

So is he?

I have to turn in. I'll leave you with this.

How do you know he has the ability to pay? Because he paid you a lot more than your agreement a few times? b/c he said so? b/c he offered you the “upper end of 5 figures?” You said he looks like any joe off the street. Maybe that is exactly what he is - nobody, just a good actor and a smooth talker.

If I had a store, I can put something on sale that I don't have in stock. It's easy. That is why I said, from the information you provided, I feel he may be baiting you. The extra money he gave you, it’s a big juicy bread crumb. Exactly what you needed. He read you like a book and saw in your eyes that you needed it. So he laid a few more breadcrumbs for you. Ergo, you said you had sex with him a few more times right? Those were breadcrumbs. Have you considered that he is drawing you into his world one breadcrumb at a time?

 

[KimGordon67]

He’s not wrong though and he didn’t claim to have been in the situation.

It's a tiny bit melodramatic. It seems pretty unlikely that this dude is the next Jeffrey Epstein.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I would also suggest getting some advice from actual sex workers. Is there a sex workers collective or other similar organisation in your area? They will know all the things to look out for. This situation does have a bazillion red flags, but they'll be able to tell you based on their actual experience what those are. I would especially recommend this if, for whatever reason, you decide to go through with this.

This is a great idea!

 

[justabitofred]

Correct. I have never paid for sex.



I have to turn in. I'll leave you with this.

How do you know he has the ability to pay? Because he paid you a lot more than your agreement a few times? b/c he said so? b/c he offered you the “upper end of 5 figures?” You said he looks like any joe off the street. Maybe that is exactly what he is - nobody, just a good actor and a smooth talker.

If I had a store, I can put something on sale that I don't have in stock. It's easy. That is why I said, from the information you provided, I feel he may be baiting you. The extra money he gave you, it’s a big juicy bread crumb. Exactly what you needed. He read you like a book and saw in your eyes that you needed it. So he laid a few more breadcrumbs for you. Ergo, you said you had sex with him a few more times right? Those were breadcrumbs. Have you considered that he is drawing you into his world one breadcrumb at a time?

So how can I know for sure?

 

[Acktion]

It's a tiny bit melodramatic. It seems pretty unlikely that this dude is the next Jeffrey Epstein.

If I had a nickel... "he seemed like such a quiet boy. Never bothered nobody."

Nobody thought Jeffrey Epstein looked like Jeffrey Epstein... until he did.

The problem with the real monsters is they look like everybody else.

 

[KimGordon67]

If I had a nickel... "he seemed like such a quiet boy. Never bothered nobody."

Nobody thought Jeffrey Epstein looked like Jeffrey Epstein... until he did.

The problem with the real monsters is they look like everybody else.

Yes, but 999,999 out of a million guys aren't Jeffrey Epstein.
And the narrative has changed from this guy being the head of some barely legal sex trafficking ring to an everyday guy with an everyday wage who has worked out how to play this girl.

 

[KimGordon67]

This is a great idea!

Actually, depending on the size of the community, sex workers might know him, especially if he's dodgy.

 

[77fbird400]

So how can I know for sure?

I have an idea. But I'm not going to tell you because I would be aiding a particular direction of your decision that practically everyone in this thread is advising against.

I'm sorry about your brother, and that your family situation is hard. You clearly cannot "adult". You don't have the worldly experience to do it. You can't see further than 2 feet in front of you.

I have some homework for you to help you build that worldly knowledge.

Research "human trafficking"

 

[77fbird400]

If you've been with the guy before and know his tastes, then I think you can do it without compromising your safety too much. Sounds like you've had a long standing relationship with him already, so the risk seems minimal. Tell your family that you are going on a "retreat" for a while. Give them the address before you go and set up a weekly check-in at a specific time.

It's your body, your choice. It's an advantage that you have in a world that constantly pushes us all down. Good for you.

If she was your daughter, would you give the same advice?

 

[IrisAlthea]

So is he?

Correct. I have never paid for sex.



I have to turn in. I'll leave you with this.

How do you know he has the ability to pay? Because he paid you a lot more than your agreement a few times? b/c he said so? b/c he offered you the “upper end of 5 figures?” You said he looks like any joe off the street. Maybe that is exactly what he is - nobody, just a good actor and a smooth talker.

If I had a store, I can put something on sale that I don't have in stock. It's easy. That is why I said, from the information you provided, I feel he may be baiting you. The extra money he gave you, it’s a big juicy bread crumb. Exactly what you needed. He read you like a book and saw in your eyes that you needed it. So he laid a few more breadcrumbs for you. Ergo, you said you had sex with him a few more times right? Those were breadcrumbs. Have you considered that he is drawing you into his world one breadcrumb at a time?

So how can I know for sure?

I don’t know if you can and even if he is, how are you going to make sure that he does provide what he said? That he doesn’t withhold it to make you do things that weren’t discussed, like standing on that street corner?

It is also easy to end up on a slippery slope of in for a penny, in for a pound. I already did x, so I might as well do y for a little bit more. That is another way to lure and bait someone.

The sex workers organization idea that Kim mentioned is great. Preferably both where you live and where you would be going.

 

[KimGordon67]

A lot of great comments already provided. I'm only going to comment on the financial aspect. You called it 'cash out on your body' but I didn't hear you say you were getting any cash. You mention room and board as well as a credit card and an expense account. You've already got room and board, since you said you're currently at home. (Yes I'm making an assumption.) The rest lets you buy stuff but isn't cash to save or bank.

Add to that, you're providing sex for income so it is not tax free. Yes you can lie and not report the income on your tax return (another thing you won't be proud of and writing home about) but that doesn't change the fact that you'd be evading paying tax, which is illegal. And if you want to report it and pay tax on your income, where's the cash coming from to do that? If you get caught, at best, you'll be financially in the hole, at worst, you'll be in jail.

So I don't see how you're getting financially ahead. Yes you might have nice clothes, live in a nice place and go to nice places, but at what cost? Only you can determine if you're prepared to pay the cost. I'm guessing you know the answer though.

Reading back through this, WW makes an excellent point here also. You can't help out your family with this guy's credit card and expense account. And neither of those things allow you to save for the future.

Unless you just want a year of having nice things in exchange for sex that it sounds like you're not particularly enjoying, this just doesn't seem like a great deal. You'd be financially tied to someone you don't know that well, and who you haven't even said you actually like, until you walk away, and you'd be walking away with nothing to show for the year that you spent there. There's definitely better ways of improving your financial situation.

In all honesty, even if all the red flags amounted to nothing, I can't see you walking out of this any better off than you are now, except you'll have wasted a year and, from the sounds of it, you won't have been happy during that time.

 

[Acktion]

Yes, but 999,999 out of a million guys aren't Jeffrey Epstein.
And the narrative has changed from this guy being the head of some barely legal sex trafficking ring to an everyday guy with an everyday wage who has worked out how to play this girl.

Okay. Ummm...

I hope it’s OK I started another account to post this question. I’m not exactly proud of this. So I may have an opportunity to be sb to a sd. I’m young, and I can and want to cash out on my body for a year or two while I still look like your little sister. Why not? It’s just sex and sex is a cinch. I know it’s wrong, but it’s my decision, I’m adulting now I’m hoping to get help thinking this through.

COVID has been really hard on me and anyone my age. No real skills, education not complete, our already crappy jobs wiped out. Even without COVID, what’s a girl to do with little (or no) bankable skills? Wait tables at min wage and beg for a tip? Prior to COVID, we had sex several times. He’s almost 40 years older than me. His tastes are not hard for me to handle. Light bondage, spanking, ropes, cuffs, collars, leash, floggers, little girl dress-up. Easy peasy. Last time we met, he said something about getting me a place near him (same country, other side) and I would be his live-near play-thing. I would have a credit card and spending account. Apparently, he has a contract for me. I’ll be joining another girl he has right now, I’m going to guess we’ll be roommates?

My thoughts are my safety. I’m not exactly proud of this so I don’t want to tell anyone. I live at home, how do I tell my parents I’ll be disappearing for a year or so? Boyfriend? Friends? How do I explain my disappearance? I’m midway through college but the semester is done, trying to think through taking a break for only one year to make some really good tax free money. Is this even legal (USA)? Did I miss anything?

It's only about money and if the money wasn't really good I simply wouldn't do it. But he's offering the upper end of 5 figures. I didn't want to reveal this but my little brother - much younger than me, is special needs. He requires constant attention and medical care. He prevents my mom from working full time because Dad makes more money. My mom and dad are blue collar workers. Paying for me, my car and college is putting a strain on our family. When you add COVID to that, and me not able to get a job then it makes it a lot worse. If this works, it could be a blessing in disguise, kind of a sacrifice on my part for my family. We have government help for COVID, but what is a thousand dollars here and there going to do?

I already said I'm not proud of this. I already said this was a bad idea. I appreciate the advice, but I said I was young, I’m not stupid, I actually thought about most of it just didn’t feel I needed to type everything out. I don’t need more reasoning around the right and wrong of it. Just seeking some help thinking through how this could work. Thank you though.

Ok, you're partly right. He paid me a much more than agreed. And no, I've never paid a bill before. I never thought about it this way - being baited. This is interesting. Can you elaborate? You're a guy right?

It's not like that at all. It's not like I sneak out of my parent's home and stand on a street corner all night. If I had to do that, I simply wouldn’t. I get what you mean though. I met him through kind of an agency if you can call it that, but there was no physical location. It's hard to explain. I don’t want to say too much about him but I will say that I’m pretty sure he’s married and has a family. I saw a glimpse of his wallet. There are some kids in there, the oldest looks too young to be his kid, probably a bit younger than me.

I guess I'm going to need some help here, Kim. At exactly what point did the narrative change so this guy is just some average schmoe? 'Cause I don't know about where you live, but where I live nobody average had five figures to throw at each member of a harem on top of supporting a family with a separate household. And granted she doesn't say just how much she charged or how much extra he threw at her on top of it, but it's pretty rare that the average schlub is going to sling a 20% tip for a piece of ass he's already had for the agreed on price unless he has already calculated that in for some reason.

***shrug*** I will grant that my perceptions might be skewed from spending a large percentage of my professional years working in detention units (speaking of mistakes made before the pre-frontal cortex is completely online). And another good chunk (after I figured out my younger self was a dumb ass) working as a teacher in a school where the overwhelming majority of students were trying to learn how to support themselves and their kids after their Sugar Daddies they dropped out of school for kicked them and the kids out for a younger model.

It may be that this guy is just a harmless old man (like me ) looking to get his boulder shifted (or maybe for the undertaker to take a day to close the coffin and a week to get the smile off his face) after spending a lifetime building up a nestegg he knows he can't take with him and I'm just particularly jaded. But, moving her 3000 miles away from support other than him... if shit goes tits up, how is her family supposed to get her back?

And if he's got that much burning a hole in his wallet, then why not continue going to her as he was evidently doing before COVID? What is he gaining by bringing her to him and housing her with another girl he already has on the string?

And on that topic, as an old fart myself and particularly conscious that I'm not gonna be here forever (especially when COVID Part III makes landfall), then why the Hell is he not conscientious enough to figure out what will happen to her if he drops dead flogging and fucking his harem and she's three thousand miles away from any support?

Like I say, I could very well be just jaded and cynical, but I've been down enough gravel roads, more than few on my face, that getting her 3000 miles away from everything and everyone she knows so that she is at his mercy for the promise of more than the average schlub makes in a year sounds an awful lot like a potential trafficking set up from one of the old inmates I can recall.


Like my Daddy told me when I was still knee-high on a grasshopper, "If it's too good to be true, it is."

 

[KimGordon67]

Okay. Ummm...











I guess I'm going to need some help here, Kim. At exactly what point did the narrative change so this guy is just some average schmoe? 'Cause I don't know about where you live, but where I live nobody average had five figures to throw at each member of a harem on top of supporting a family with a separate household. And granted she doesn't say just how much she charged or how much extra he threw at her on top of it, but it's pretty rare that the average schlub is going to sling a 20% tip for a piece of ass he's already had for the agreed on price unless he has already calculated that in for some reason.

***shrug*** I will grant that my perceptions might be skewed from spending a large percentage of my professional years working in detention units (speaking of mistakes made before the pre-frontal cortex is completely online). And another good chunk (after I figured out my younger self was a dumb ass) working as a teacher in a school where the overwhelming majority of students were trying to learn how to support themselves and their kids after their Sugar Daddies they dropped out of school for kicked them and the kids out for a younger model.

It may be that this guy is just a harmless old man (like me ) looking to get his boulder shifted (or maybe for the undertaker to take a day to close the coffin and a week to get the smile off his face) after spending a lifetime building up a nestegg he knows he can't take with him and I'm just particularly jaded. But, moving her 3000 miles away from support other than him... if shit goes tits up, how is her family supposed to get her back?

And if he's got that much burning a hole in his wallet, then why not continue going to her as he was evidently doing before COVID? What is he gaining by bringing her to him and housing her with another girl he already has on the string?

And on that topic, as an old fart myself and particularly conscious that I'm not gonna be here forever (especially when COVID Part III makes landfall), then why the Hell is he not conscientious enough to figure out what will happen to her if he drops dead flogging and fucking his harem and she's three thousand miles away from any support?

Like I say, I could very well be just jaded and cynical, but I've been down enough gravel roads, more than few on my face, that getting her 3000 miles away from everything and everyone she knows so that she is at his mercy for the promise of more than the average schlub makes in a year sounds an awful lot like a potential trafficking set up from one of the old inmates I can recall.


Like my Daddy told me when I was still knee-high on a grasshopper, "If it's too good to be true, it is."

I meant 77fbird400's hypothetical narrative, not the OP's version of events.

But I'm in total agreement that it's too good to be true ... and it doesn't even actually sound that good.

 

[justabitofred]

If she was your daughter, would you give the same advice?

That's sweet, thanks "dad" and also for making me think.

 

[justabitofred]

I have an idea. But I'm not going to tell you because I would be aiding a particular direction of your decision that practically everyone in this thread is advising against.

I'm sorry about your brother, and that your family situation is hard. You clearly cannot "adult". You don't have the worldly experience to do it. You can't see further than 2 feet in front of you.

I have some homework for you to help you build that worldly knowledge.

Research "human trafficking"

Ok, I get it. But if they wanted to kidnap me, why go to all this trouble to find someone in a different city? Why not just do it on the first encounter? Or the second one? Why wait?

 

[justabitofred]

freebird it's because it's illegal and I'll make a lot of noise. He wants me to agree and go quietly.

 

[sub2femdom]

If she was your daughter, would you give the same advice?

It surely wouldn't be judgmental advice.

Doesn't matter what my relation to the girl is. If *I* were in her shoes, I'd probably go for it. For most "women of the night", this is absolutely a fairy tale situation.

You can get murdered going to a convenience store at the wrong time. Life is full of unexpected surprises. The OP flat out said that she's been seeing this guy through an 'arrangement' for some time now, and now he's offering her much more for her continued presence in his life.

Frankly, I'm jealous that women, especially pretty women, have this luxury in life. Some men do too of course. Instead of being jealous and reactionary, I choose to look at things from her point of view and yeah, I'd take the job.

There's much worse jobs out there. If you've never scrubbed shit smears off bathroom walls for minimum wage, then I suggest you give it a try, then see how banging a wealthy older person for 10,000x as much $$ compares.

 

[KimGordon67]

It surely wouldn't be judgmental advice.

Doesn't matter what my relation to the girl is. If *I* were in her shoes, I'd probably go for it. For most "women of the night", this is absolutely a fairy tale situation.

You can get murdered going to a convenience store at the wrong time. Life is full of unexpected surprises. The OP flat out said that she's been seeing this guy through an 'arrangement' for some time now, and now he's offering her much more for her continued presence in his life.

Frankly, I'm jealous that women, especially pretty women, have this luxury in life. Some men do too of course. Instead of being jealous and reactionary, I choose to look at things from her point of view and yeah, I'd take the job.

There's much worse jobs out there. If you've never scrubbed shit smears off bathroom walls for minimum wage, then I suggest you give it a try, then see how banging a wealthy older person for 10,000x as much $$ compares.

The problem is it's not a 'job'. She would be getting paid thousands of dollars, and wouldn't be free to spend whatever she earns however she sees fit - it's all on credit cards and 'expense accounts' that he controls, and I would guarantee that there'll be a limit on how much she can spend, and probably on what she can spend it on. Most sex workers actually value their independence, and I can't imagine many would opt for this, as they'd be basically walking away from their established lives to be at someone else's beck and call.

She said she's seen this guy a few times - it doesn't sound like they've had an ongoing relationship at all, and she's given no indication that she actually likes him.

I think you're right that being judgemental and condescending isn't helpful, but it's probably not great to overly romanticise things either. This situation, as it's been described, is NOT giving her financial independence.

 

[77fbird400]

freebird it's because it's illegal and I'll make a lot of noise. He wants me to agree and go quietly.

Firebird, its a car.

Great thinking! He would be committing a criminal act. It’s a start. Although you should be able to think of this much quicker with a greater breadth. Let’s practice. Can you think of some more reasons why didn’t he just nab you and carry you off? Why is he so intent on showing you the $$ and a contract? Take a step back, look at the bigger picture. What does this person have in mind? Pretend you are him. Look through his eyes. What’s on his mind?

BTW your private messages are off. Some people may be wishing to communicate with you outside of this thread.

 

[wicked woman]

Firebird, its a car.


BTW your private messages are off. Some people may be wishing to communicate with you outside of this thread.

Oh, don't suggest that.

 

[KimGordon67]

Ha. I think I've worked out what's going on in this thread. I hope I'm right.

 

[ultramarineblue]

It really does sound as though you're being groomed for sex trafficking. Trafficking is not usually that idea of being kidnapped. I can't remember the percentage but that's actually very little of it. A lot is through people desperate and do stuff to pay rent or get groceries. Pics are taken and then blackmail starts. Not all of it is super organized but it is scary how much is. I really hope this is not the case with him especially if you go through with it.

 

[justabitofred]

Firebird, its a car.

Great thinking! He would be committing a criminal act. It’s a start. Although you should be able to think of this much quicker with a greater breadth. Let’s practice. Can you think of some more reasons why didn’t he just nab you and carry you off? Why is he so intent on showing you the $$ and a contract? Take a step back, look at the bigger picture. What does this person have in mind? Pretend you are him. Look through his eyes. What’s on his mind?

BTW your private messages are off. Some people may be wishing to communicate with you outside of this thread.

Car? You're a guy for sure.

I don't understand what you mean by greater breath. Can you explain? Tried to google it.

How does he get me out of the hotel? He's not a big guy, pretty old and I'm fit? I'm being baited? He's trying to tell me he's rich? How could I know what a 60 year old man wants. Sex?