Djmac1031
Consumate BS Artist
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2021
- Posts
- 4,014
Furiously scrubbing notes…
So what's more confusing, story notes generated by Chat GPT or a bunch of random weirdos on the internet?
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Furiously scrubbing notes…
The internet has been an ersatz AI for a generation.Chat GPT or a bunch of random weirdos on the internet?
Like there’s a difference?So what's more confusing, story notes generated by Chat GPT or a bunch of random weirdos on the internet?
A normal woman is captured by a wealthy European aristocrat. She is held essentially as a sex slave, and used for breeding purposes.
She has the appearance of freedom, but her every public appearance is carefully controlled and stage-managed. She knows that the aristocrat’s henchmen are near and all it would take is one hypodermic needle for her to have an unfortunate and unexplained heart attack. There have been other strange deaths of people who have married into his family in the past.
Her days are agony. Her nights full of sexual torture. Her whole life is a facade, nothing is real.
But then she has an idea. A daring idea to highlight both her plight and maybe get help. She doctors a family photo in ways that even a myopic bat wearing sunglasses would find immediately bizarre. This is how she will get her cry for help out. This is how she will save herself.
I’m still thinking about what happens in chapter two.
Working title: The Princess and the Photo
—
Now, while I think the overall plot is pretty realistic, verging on gritty, I feel that the photograph stuff is just too unbelievable. Will it rip readers out of the story?
What do you think?
Any help appreciated.
Emily
Or maybe a missing wedding band, right?Maybe it's just me but I don't see a captive of any sort having access to a computer.
What I can see is the captive convincing her captor that a piece of personal jewelry is a family heirloom. It would be familiar to those close to her, enough so that if she were to wear it upside down, sideways, or on the wrong side of her outfit, it would raise questions. Especially if there was some sort of (questionably accurate) family history behind doing so. She could also emphasize that not wearing it would definitely raise a lot of questions.
If I were going to write a story like that, I think I'd go that route.
Some captives are held by immaterial bonds, and their captivity is far from secret.I don't see a captive of any sort having access to a computer.
Or maybe a missing wedding band, right?
I agree that the photo is going to be a hard sell.A normal woman is captured by a wealthy European aristocrat. She is held essentially as a sex slave, and used for breeding purposes.
She has the appearance of freedom, but her every public appearance is carefully controlled and stage-managed. She knows that the aristocrat’s henchmen are near and all it would take is one hypodermic needle for her to have an unfortunate and unexplained heart attack. There have been other strange deaths of people who have married into his family in the past.
Her days are agony. Her nights full of sexual torture. Her whole life is a facade, nothing is real.
But then she has an idea. A daring idea to highlight both her plight and maybe get help. She doctors a family photo in ways that even a myopic bat wearing sunglasses would find immediately bizarre. This is how she will get her cry for help out. This is how she will save herself.
I’m still thinking about what happens in chapter two.
Working title: The Princess and the Photo
—
Now, while I think the overall plot is pretty realistic, verging on gritty, I feel that the photograph stuff is just too unbelievable. Will it rip readers out of the story?
What do you think?
Any help appreciated.
Emily
Some captives are held by immaterial bonds, and their captivity is far from secret.
You’d kinda think so, right?I agree that the photo is going to be a hard sell.
It would obviously be a photo posted on social media, or a magazine or newspaper.
If she is so closely guarded, her social media posted would probably be edited before posting.
It probably wasIf the mistake or cry for help is so obvious. It would be detected by her minders.
It's fiction so anything's possible, but if you want that edge of plausibility then it would have to be carefully disguised.You’d kinda think so, right?
It probably was
Emily
Maybe it's just me but I don't see a captive of any sort having access to a computer.
As a man who once turned to his wife and said, "Darling, shall we start a family?" I'm a bit worried that I may have 'used her for breeding purposes' It seemed okay at the time, but for some reason your wording has got me second guessing myself.She is held essentially as a sex slave, and used for breeding purposes.
Its a common thing for powerful people (esp men) to have open secrets. For instance, a mistress or other outside sexual activity that everyone, including his wife and often the press, knows about, but nobody publicly acknowledges. Until something happens that makes it impossible to not see, then it becomes a scandal. Bill and Monica. Anthony Weiner. Harvey Weinstein. Tony Soprano and that one floozy...True. My understanding of the scenario was that the aristocrat would not want that kind of publicity.
A normal woman is captured by a wealthy European aristocrat. She is held essentially as a sex slave, and used for breeding purposes.
She has the appearance of freedom, but her every public appearance is carefully controlled and stage-managed. She knows that the aristocrat’s henchmen are near and all it would take is one hypodermic needle for her to have an unfortunate and unexplained heart attack. There have been other strange deaths of people who have married into his family in the past.
Her days are agony. Her nights full of sexual torture. Her whole life is a facade, nothing is real.
But then she has an idea. A daring idea to highlight both her plight and maybe get help. She doctors a family photo in ways that even a myopic bat wearing sunglasses would find immediately bizarre. This is how she will get her cry for help out. This is how she will save herself.
I’m still thinking about what happens in chapter two.
Working title: The Princess and the Photo
—
Now, while I think the overall plot is pretty realistic, verging on gritty, I feel that the photograph stuff is just too unbelievable. Will it rip readers out of the story?
What do you think?
Any help appreciated.
Emily
Its a common thing for powerful people (esp men) to have open secrets. For instance, a mistress or other outside sexual activity that everyone, including his wife and often the press, knows about, but nobody publicly acknowledges. Until something happens that makes it impossible to not see, then it becomes a scandal. Bill and Monica. Anthony Weiner. Harvey Weinstein. Tony Soprano and that one floozy...
This story could possibly fit into that paradigm. Instead of her escape depending on simply somebody on the outside knowing about her situation, it depends on it coming to widespread public knowledge. That whatever it is holding her, it can only be broken by *public* knowledge, by formal legal/press acknowledgement.
I’m very naive about many things.Perhaps I'm misreading this, but did you just say that "A woman [being] held essentially as a sex slave, and used for breeding purposes" is pretty realistic?
I'm assuming you've never been in Europe. Let me clear this one out for you: it's not The Lord of the Rings.
Wow, I totally forgot about that.Ah, Carlos Danger. That's a name I've not heard in a long time...
Like the local law is on the aristocrat's side, the local press is cowed. They all know about it, but nobody can stand up to him. When word gets out very publicly beyond the local level - because people on the internet start seeing her sign language or whatever and it eventually goes viral - people on the outside start pressuring the people on top out there, who start pressuring the people on top in the aristocrat's area, it all collapses on him and she gets free.whatever it is holding her, it can only be broken by *public* knowledge, by formal legal/press acknowledgement.
here's a real (as opposed to realistic) scenario: black american rapper is using women as slaves...
View attachment 2327121
A black rapper, not all of them, most of them, or even some of them, one of them. Just because you have your view of reality doesn't mean there is a real problem with this out there in the real word.
here's a real (as opposed to realistic) scenario: black american rapper is using women as slaves...
View attachment 2327121