How did you start talking about a threesome with your wife or husband?

For those of you who one day, while in a long-term relationship, embarked on a threesome, how did the idea come about between you and your partner? Considering you were both newbies and had never talked about this before, who made the first move? What was the “request” or “initial idea” like? And what was your or your partner's reaction like?

I ask these questions here because I am very unsure about how to open this type of conversation with my wife. It would be interesting to know what each of yours experiences were like.
Just open honesty!! Magic! 🤩
 
Sounds like it’s been in her mind, and maybe she was gauging your reaction. Have you discussed fantasies in general before? Maybe you ask her if she has fantasies she hasn’t told you about, or ask if she has ever thought of a threesome fantasy. Don’t ask her at first “can you see us having a threesome”. Ask her general thoughts first before you make an assumption of the details. She might share more than you expect. And that can open conversation to go deeper.

Unfortunately we still haven't talked about it in a proper way, a calm down moment, both relaxed etc., everything that is recommended… but it will certainly happen one day, because I also think she's giving me some hinks and revelations just to check what I think about it.

Until now, what has been said has always been something very brief, in a joking tone (and always coming from her), without major developments to a more deeper conversation. The one time I asked directly about a fantasy of hers, the answer was “having sex in a motel room” and nothing more. But at that moment I feel like she became a little shy and surprised by the question and it was the way she found out to respond anything, even though she had something else in mind, something more kinky.

Your suggestion to introduce the subject gently sounds good to me, because she already used the same "Have you ever thought about..." strategy related to open relationships.
 
Unfortunately we still haven't talked about it in a proper way, a calm down moment, both relaxed etc., everything that is recommended… but it will certainly happen one day, because I also think she's giving me some hinks and revelations just to check what I think about it.

Until now, what has been said has always been something very brief, in a joking tone (and always coming from her), without major developments to a more deeper conversation. The one time I asked directly about a fantasy of hers, the answer was “having sex in a motel room” and nothing more. But at that moment I feel like she became a little shy and surprised by the question and it was the way she found out to respond anything, even though she had something else in mind, something more kinky.

Your suggestion to introduce the subject gently sounds good to me, because she already used the same "Have you ever thought about..." strategy related to open relationships.
You sound like a great guy and certainly not pushing it on her, which could easily have a negative effect. Speaking as a woman and I think most all women, if I feel safe and not threatened, I will open up to my partner more easily.

That was why I suggested gently asking her thoughts of a subject, but not placing any expectation that’s what you want from her (even though I know you would like it). Just my 2 cents lol. You can DM if you like.
 
About 5 years into our relationship my wife and I were laying in bed in a state of post-coital bliss. She asked me if I had any sexual fantasies. I hesitated to answer because I feared her response would be negative. I asked her if she had any, and she said something about sex on a boat or sex in a high-rise luxury hotel room -- leaning heavily into romantic situations involving just the two of us. She turned the conversation back to my fantasies, and eventually I gave in and told her -- sex with two women. She was stunned at first, then upset that I did not think she was enough for me. I explained that it is a common male fantasy - probably the most common - and it did not mean she wasn't enough for me.
Over the next several years she would bring it up occasionally, usually after hearing some confirmation that it was, actually, a common fantasy for men. Finally, about 10 years after our initial conversation, she told me one day she was ready to do it. That led to a conversation over who would be the other woman? We knew some lesbians, but by definition they were out. We knew no bisexual women, so after a while we settled one of her friends as the top candidate. Unfortunately she was several states away and living her own life. A few months later she became friendly with a co-worker, but before we got anywhere with her she quit her job and moved to another state. After that we went to lesbian bars and checking out ads in sexual publications. Eventually, after two years of searching, we met a woman who was attractive, friendly, sexy, and looking for a threesome with a couple.
I have brought up the possibility of an MFM on several occasions, but she was never interested.
 
I brought it up initially one night when she was blowing me and I was simultaneously using a favorite toy on her which always sent her over the edge . She didn't respond but her reaction was unmistakable . Another time , maybe a couple years later , I brought it up again during another similar episode with the same result . She was extremely animated and gushing so I felt ....maybe someday .

Interestingly someday started when she and a girlfriend brought me and her husband fresh drinks then proceeded to strip in front of us , kneel down and proceed to blow us . He and I were shocked and thrilled at the same time watching each others wives sucking their girlfriends husbands cock !

Long story but the threesomes started shortly after that any time one of the four of us was mia . The foursomes happened more frequently though .
 
For those of you who one day, while in a long-term relationship, embarked on a threesome, how did the idea come about between you and your partner? Considering you were both newbies and had never talked about this before, who made the first move? What was the “request” or “initial idea” like? And what was your or your partner's reaction like?

I ask these questions here because I am very unsure about how to open this type of conversation with my wife. It would be interesting to know what each of yours experiences were like.
The initial idea for a threesome was mine. I've always been a flirt and my husband loves it. He never has had any objections to seeing me enjoy myself with other gents. It happened one evening by accident when we met a gentleman in a bar. My husband encouraged us and we enjoyed a fabulous time. It's the best thing we have ever done. We both find threesomes extremely erotic and enjoyable
 
my and my partner met on a dating app and talked over text a lot before we actually spoke. some stuff came up then, not a lot but a bit. told her id had mmf mff a few times in the past and id also sucked a guy, she was fine with it. she told me she had done a mmf and been with a female a bit too, think it was a one off. when we got together we talked during sex but she said she wouldnt allow another guy to fuck her, she said having me suck off a guy with her there would be a big turn on. to be honest i think the way she was talking she would suck of another guy with me and maybe had him fondle/ lick her maybe if she got turned on enough.

our sex lives went a bit south due to a few things mainly medical but have started picking up again. weve had pillow talk and when she was really turned on the other week, i had a dildo in her pumping away i asked her if she would like a guy lay each side of her sucking on both her tits at the same time and maybe both playing with her pussy too, fingering her at the same time. she seemed quite keen! i also brought it up and sucking mine and another guys cock, she said mmmmm both in my mouth at the same time! so i guess that was a yes lol she was close to orgasm and said she would like one in each end too then both coming over her tits. she did say though she would want me from behind and him in her mouth.

we have never done it and not sure we will. she has a few health issues and that kind of puts her off. we have spoke about swingers clubs, she likes the idea but wouldnt go due to her health. she likes the idea of having sex in one and using all the rooms and whatever else they have. i have tried looking for a swingers/sex hotel where we could go stay in and see where that takes us. even if nothing else happend with others i think it would be fun, i know she dosent want me with another woman for a fact. she had mentioned that a couple of times. im said im fine with that, i told her i get a thing about her enjoying a mmf with me.
she does like other stuff in the bed room too, stuff a little kinky like light bondage and so on, dildos,toys and porn. might not be kinky to others though lol she knows i like cock pumping too, i did it last week before i went to bed as i knew we were going to have some play time. i had pumped it for abotu an hour so it was very thick and ready. she coudl barely get it half way in her mouth but she enjoyed it and said id have to pump in front of her sometime so she could see how its done and get to suck it as soon as it comes out the tube.

she does want us to get away for a naughty weekend soon, im busy seekign a nice place with a jacuzzi on site, idealy one in the room.
 
Our adventures started while we were dating. We were hanging out with a friend, all drinking, my future wife and I started making out, he reached in for a tit squeeze and she didn't push him away. We enjoyed it, talked about it the next day, decided we would do it again and we just never stopped.
 
With us, it started out playing with toys and double penetration. When we tried what was essentially a cock ring with an adjustable dildo so I could penetrate her pussy and the dildo was in her ass at the same time, she had multiple orgasms and loved it. The second time we used it, we actually attached the little egg vibrator that hit her clit and she was a quivering mess when I finally shot my load.
When we were watching some amateur porn with a woman getting stuffed in all three holes, I asked her if she would like to try the same thing. She said she wouldn't mind trying two to start with. A few weeks later we traveled to our closest beach town and ran into one of her old coworkers at a bar. A few drinks later, we all headed back to our hotel and Mrs. Stromer had her first spit roast and V/A dp with two real cocks. She loved it and I loved that she was open enough to try it. That was when we really started to explore the swinging lifestyle.
 
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