How much of an age difference are you comfortable with?

[James G 5]

I'm physically attracted to anything big enough to breed and bleed; but more than 10 years my junior and I start feeling as if I ought to be flogged in the town square.

And I bet we could sell tickets, too

 

[kitty4ever]

And I bet we could sell tickets, too

Who would do the flogging, though?

 

[bluntforcemama]

I met my husband in college. We are the same age. At that time I would have never dreamed of meeting/dating someone 20 years my senior. Having said that, I do seem to be drawn more towards older men then those my own age in recent years. The funny thing is around certain older men I become very timid and self-conscious, and I've always been that way.

I'm this way, too. Now that I'm about to be single again, I'm refusing to date anyone less than five years my senior. The maturity level just isn't there if they aren't in their thirties. Now, I'll make exceptions if I think I should, but I haven't yet.

 

[kitty4ever]

I'm this way, too. Now that I'm about to be single again, I'm refusing to date anyone less than five years my senior. The maturity level just isn't there if they aren't in their thirties. Now, I'll make exceptions if I think I should, but I haven't yet.

I agree, Myst. This is a big key why I would not even consider someone more than 5 years younger than me. Otherwise, they're probably just out of college or in their last year or so. Definately not in the same place in life that I am.

Again, this may all change as I get older, but I doubt it.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

When I was much younger (20s), women a couple of years (2-5 or so) older were very attractive - largely because of a presumption of experience, and Masters & Johnson had revealed that women's sexuality peaks in the late 20s and into the 30s, while men's peaked in late teens into the 20s. I was very aware of that statistic.

By my late 20s, it was women my own age that looked and "felt" most attractive to me. In the mid-thirties, I was back to late 20s and into the 30s again. I've pretty much stayed at that point for the last 20 years. My preference, when I was looking, was late 20s to about 40, figuring, okay, find one in that range that fits my needs, and her drives will probably slow at about the same rate as mine, and we'll fit together well.

To be honest, now age is not nearly as important to me as it used to be. What is important is that our wants and needs mesh, and that we have the physical/chemical connection that I require for a LTR. Age is (mostly) just a number, and my heart can't add or subtract past "one plus one equals us."

 

[Netzach]

In theory I balk at 20 year old girls, in reality I seem to have attracted a little fan club of them, and they're all more mature than a lot of 30 year olds I know, possibly even me.

The oldest person I've had sex with also happened to be another woman too, so far.

I like men my own age or quite a bit older, as a rule, women my age or a bit younger. I look for emotional maturity, or people who have had a few bad knocks from life, people who have had a cushy ride tend not to attract me very much.

 

[SkyBluAngelEyes]

My Master was 8 years younger than me.

So, ten to fifteen years older or ten years younger than me would be just about right, although age now seems so unimportant than when I was much younger.

 

[redelicious]

Bad little girls get ashamed around their daddies

Ok, you know I laughed at this when I first read it, but then I got to thinking. I'm not sure what the right word is for how I feel around some older men, but it's not shame.

Hmmm, I'll have to give this more thought.

now back to our scheduled topic...

 

[James G 5]

Ok, you know I laughed at this when I first read it, but then I got to thinking. I'm not sure what the right word is for how I feel around some older men, but it's not shame.

Hmmm, I'll have to give this more thought.

now back to our scheduled topic...

Glad I could get you thinking
I'm here to help, after all

 

[Esclava]

Some of us call it...

Ok, you know I laughed at this when I first read it, but then I got to thinking. I'm not sure what the right word is for how I feel around some older men, but it's not shame.

<snip>

...a healthy respect for the wisdom of our elders! It comes from good home training....

Esclava

 

[Bandit58]

My ex husband was 3 years older than me. He was my first and only sex partner until I was 43. The next two partners I had were older by 2 and 11 years respectively. I then had a "friend with benefits" who was 18 months younger, until I got together with Master, who is close to 6 years older. I have been with one woman, one time, who was 3 years older.

I don't think, at almost 46, that I could be with a male younger than 30. However I could probably stretch to having a female as young as 25......and for both sexes the upper limit would be no more than 10 years older.

 

[AZMajician]

Hmmm... this topic made me think a bit...

When I was a young lad of 17-18.. I was totally smitten by two women around 38 or 39 years old. One was married and the other divorced. They were very good friends. I have to say, the married one was a very big temptation.. (possibly the idea that it was not nice to make love to someone else's wife.)

The divorced lady and I had a short love affair, and her married friend always liked to tease me... After she got a divorce I had a great time with both. In fact there were a few times that the three of us enjoyed sharing each other.

Most of my life, I enjoyed women who were older than me.. most were in their late 30's, a few in the 40's.

When I got to be around 30 I was still dating and seeing women that were older than me.

My first wife was 39 when I was 26. My second wife was 42 when I was about 35.

I think back, and up till I was in my 40's, I always dated or was involved with women who were always older than me. My last Long term relationship (just over 3 years), was with a woman who was older than me by only 11 months. That was probably the only relationship since high school with someone close to my own age.

As I look at or notice women lately, they are either in their late 30's, mid to late 40's, or in a very few cases.. in the very late 20's or early 30's.. but these younger ones that I seem to notice are just lovely or very sexy women.

I am not seeing anyone at this time.. but the ones that I seem to be interested in, or have developed friendships with are as I said.. mid to late 40's and maybe one or two that have reached 50.

When I was 20 I even had a brief sex only relationship with a woman who was probably over 55, but even though the sex was fun, I never did know her true age, nor did we ever "date", it was all about the sex baby...

Hmm... maybe I should forget about marriage.. LTR's, and all that stuff.. It's been 7 years since my last relationship ended, and 8 and a half years since I made love to a woman. I guess I have forgotten most of what I knew, and at 50.. probably wont get any more chances...


Majic.

 

[Mr Blonde]

I am 30 and when it comes to committed relationships I go for women anywhere from 23-37 years old. I'm not looking for anything casual, but if I was my range would not expand very much (21-40 years old).

These numbers are based on experience. BDSM is just one aspect of a relationship and there are many factors when it comes to compability.

 

[BlueSugar]

I am 4 years younger, and we have fun with the age play and other roleplay situations. I am also shorter/smaller then he is and we get off on the power play of course as well.

It never bothers me, it is just weird to talk about tv, music because of the age gap it makes for pretty funny conversations sometimes.

As for how comfortable I am, I actually don't know, hes the oldest person I've been with. I don't really see age, I think life experience, maturity and interests... unless its illegal, it doesn't bother me.

 

[Slut_loves_pain]

I'm 21 my current man/Master is 37, my exhusband is 31 and my other long term is 31. Lets just say I never go with men less than 8 years older than me!!!!

 

[ChasingShadowsX]

15 years older 3 years younger (at the moment) would be fine by me. But I think as I get older it'll become more like next year 14 years older 4 years younger, year after that 13 years older 5 years younger.

 

[PyroDemon]

Used to be I had my cutoff at ten years younger than me. I only set an age for younger simply for the sake of maturity and common interests as far as a timeline went. Since then I have changed my views a bit and age is just not a question anymore. I have met immature 50 year olds and 21 year olds that make me feel immature even. So I will just base it on the person, not their age.

 

[DVS]

Age is a misnomer. Intelligence or life experience is what I look for.

 

[SweetDommes]

Um... it doesn't really worry me too much. So long as she was 18 or over (legal age of consent here), and we were compatible and mutually attracted.

Of course, people closer to my age I tend to find more compatible. But there are always exceptions. So I don't tend to have any kind of preconceived notion of appropriate age.

Pretty much same here - we did narrow our search age range before finding sylvan, but that was mostly to help sort out those who were not going to be compatable (mostly, those who can't read )

My oldest sex partner is now about 53, my ex boyfriend is now 46, with me about to turn 27. Our boys are 36 and 26 ... I'd have to say that even though I like to look at younger, I prefer older if anything is actually going to happen.

 

[kbg]

i'm 38. my next door neighbour carol is 72....and everytime i see her i just want to bend her over, pull her panties to one side and tongue-fuck her ass. so, for me, a 34 year age gap would be just fine

 

[JoseIsWild]

A women 5 years older than me or 12 or so years younger.

 

[MastrJ]

I'm 33 and am willing to at least look at the possibility of a relationship with a girl as young as 18. Though I'll be honest and say that I'd probably tend towards more a fling with someone that young. Older, I don't know. The only women I've dated that were older than me were only older by a month or so. I was attracted to a woman about 3 years older than me once. We just never hooked up. I've tended to date women younger than me, but I think a lot of that is just circumstance. I just haven't met or aren't in situations to meet women my own age.

So, in summary: 18 - 36 would be my range, but don't hold me to it.

 

[ShyGuy68]

To me age isn't that important, it's more important that she seem mature, and that her and I can talk.

 

[sigsauerprinces]

like aaliyah sang when she was 15 "age aint nuthin but a number"

 

[barcaboy]

I went out with several older women when I first got out of college - 42 and 38. By the time they were through with me, I think I qualified as "mature" for my age - what they did for me should have at least qualified them for tax credits or something.

I'm now older than they were then. I frankly love playing (more of a fling-thing than LTR) with much younger women.

Why? In BDSM terms, there is that much-remarked-on charged dynamic at play - calm experience/authority in sinister league with nervous vulnerability. The teacher/mentor in me likes (mis)shaping young minds. And then there is the vicarious transfusion a younger partner's energy level provides.