How much of an age difference are you comfortable with?

[Arles]

I'm comfortable with a fairly large age difference. I'm in my 40s, and my relationships for the last 10 have all been with women in their 20s. I keep getting older, but they all stay the same age, for some reason.

 

[Jetta_Wales]

I think a lot of men would class that as being very lucky lol.

 

[Richard49]

I think a lot of men would class that as being very lucky lol.

It is not a question of what us men think
it is a question of weather he and the women find the relationship profitable

 

[Jetta_Wales]

I'm mearly being a little light hearted.

 

[Arles]

It is not a question of what us men think
it is a question of weather he and the women find the relationship profitable

Precisely. I agree with your earlier points, as well. I think for many there are connotations of something tawdry or forbidden whenever the age difference is as great as it is for me and my pyl's. And there is no question that I and they do occasionally derive a certain thrill from precisely those same connotations--playing them up in one way or another to enhance various experiences.

For the most part, however, age difference is a difference that does not make a difference.

I like the fact that it also serves as a good hypocrisy barometer. As Jetta said, privately men will tell me that I am lucky. Publicly, they'll often look at us with disgust.

 

[Jetta_Wales]

with over 10 years difference between my husband and I and the fact that I am married with a baby at only 20 years of age I have often faced ridicule from people who assume because of my age that I could not possibly know what I'm doing and must be making a mistake.

Though I find that those most likely to ridicule and judge are those that should know me better than that mainly my older brothers and friends my own age.

There are way to many people in this worl who judge maturity by the date on your birth certificate and it's a shame.

 

[BlushingFlames]

Honestly

I think the age really depends on the two people involved, I can't see myself with someone 20 years older than me nor someone 5 years younger than me. The one training me is 6 years older than me which is good for me within the life I am inolved with at the moment. I don't think it really matters what the age is, it matters whats right for you personally...what they can offer you, and how your happy with them

Sarah

 

[barcaboy]

I have to admit that I am alternately of two camps.

First, that when interests and personalities and the ineffable are in alignment age doesn't really matter - call this the "souls have no birth or expiration date" theory.

Second, that age differences can be fun. I'm one of those people that doesn't get relationships where both people are almost dopplegangers of each other - I mean, where's the fun, the surprise, the mystery in that "our crowd" or "people like us" mentality? And the fact that in benighted social circles - out which I was spawned - the discrepancy can be shocking or disgraceful is only so much cream-and-cherry topping.

 

[h_i_s]

my Master is 11 years my senior (He is 47 & i am 36). Prior to meeting and being owned by Him (24/7 R/T TPE) i wouldn't even concider anyone not at least 5 years older than myself. --just my preference, i relate much better to older men & always have especially in the thought of a D/s relationship.

 

[Etoile]

Second, that age differences can be fun. I'm one of those people that doesn't get relationships where both people are almost dopplegangers of each other - I mean, where's the fun, the surprise, the mystery in that "our crowd" or "people like us" mentality? And the fact that in benighted social circles - out which I was spawned - the discrepancy can be shocking or disgraceful is only so much cream-and-cherry topping.

Oh, absolutely! I love playing with the age difference. It makes me a little bit more demonstrative when Daddy and I are out, because I don't want people to think I really am eir daughter! (We don't look much alike, but I still worry that people will think we're genuinely related.) It's much more fun for me to fuck with the minds of others by making them realize that yes, this young chick really is with an older person, sexually and everything!

 

[FungiUg]

Oh, I don't know. Them thinking you are their (is their genderised?) daughter, and then hearing you trade sexual inuendos... that would be even MORE of a mind fuck!

 

[Etoile]

them thinking of you as eir daughter

I'm not trying to horrify people, though, not really. I want to shake them up, fuck with their preconceived notions...but not SCARE them. Does that make sense?

 

[FungiUg]

Does that make sense?

Yes. But I fail to see why "their" is genderised... since it's a plural that doesn't imply any gender.

 

[Etoile]

Yes. But I fail to see why "their" is genderised... since it's a plural that doesn't imply any gender.

Maybe I'm misunderstanding what you were saying? You said "Them" meaning other people who see us out there, and then "their" meaning my Daddy...right? Or did you mean something else? If that is what you meant...yes, technically "their" is plural, but I thought you were using it to refer to one person!

 

[FungiUg]

Okay. Yes, I used "them" as a non-specific term to refer to anyone (singular or plural) where you might be masquerading as "their" daughter...

Whereas I guess "eir" is a specific singular term? I read it as a non-genderised version of "their", but then thought "hang on a minute, their isn't genderised to start with!"

 

[Etoile]

Okay. Yes, I used "them" as a non-specific term to refer to anyone (singular or plural) where you might be masquerading as "their" daughter...

Whereas I guess "eir" is a specific singular term? I read it as a non-genderised version of "their", but then thought "hang on a minute, their isn't genderised to start with!"

Oh! Now I understand your initial statement.

Eir is the Spivak form of his and her:

She is his daughter.
She is her daughter.
She is eir daughter.

 

[FungiUg]

Yup. Now it makes sense. I think maybe I should just go back to stalking you...

 

[Sir_Winston54]

It all depends on the age at which you contemplate the question.

At 20, a few years younger would have bothered me a lot although an older man would have been fine. At 30 & 40 my own age seemed to work. Now at 50 I've discovered that it doesn't really matter as long as the man is mature and your interests match & I've become, without planning to, a cradle snatcher (my emphasis - SW). Just call me Demi lol

Seeing the "cradle snatcher" reference reminds me of then-recently-divorced wife #2's reaction when she met the young lady who became wife #3. I was, at the time, 50; wife #2 was 51 (a year and a week older than I). Wife #3-to-be was at that time a couple of months shy of 24. With #3-to-be a dozen feet or so away, #2 made a quiet comment about my being a "cradle robber." #3 has very good hearing; she piped up and said, "He's not a cradle robber - I'm a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed robber!" I cracked up, almost literally rolling in the fire ant-infested yard, while #2 (never known for her sense of humor) struggled to contain herself, then laughed.

 

[Wednesday'sRose]

Oh, absolutely! I love playing with the age difference. It makes me a little bit more demonstrative when Daddy and I are out, because I don't want people to think I really am eir daughter! (We don't look much alike, but I still worry that people will think we're genuinely related.) It's much more fun for me to fuck with the minds of others by making them realize that yes, this young chick really is with an older person, sexually and everything!

Funny you should mention that....
I don't consider my Master "Daddy" but he has been presumed to be my father by a confused hairdresser when we were out. I don't do anything to promote this thought to people and corrected the person, but both of us got a good laugh out of the situation.


I do really enjoy fucking with the minds of the old, rich conservatives around here when we're out, though. It's just so much fun! It's great when you realize that the middle age women are scowling at me with disdain, while their husbands are staring at Master with something akin to envy. I remember being told when I first got together with Master that he was "old enough to be my father." I didn't think of that as a hinderance then and that opinion hasn't changed.
The only thing that ever brings it up is things that date the person saying it (like movies, concerts, etc.) and those just generally lead to good-natured teasing. Our relationship works for us, age difference or not, and that's all that matters to me.

Anyway, reading your comment just made me think about that incidence and gave me a grin; thought I would share.

 

[Etoile]

Funny you should mention that....
I don't consider my Master "Daddy" but he has been presumed to be my father by a confused hairdresser when we were out. I don't do anything to promote this thought to people and corrected the person, but both of us got a good laugh out of the situation.

Heh, my wife gets that with me sometimes, but we're only 12 years apart. It's kind of annoying to have people think she's my mom! We don't get it as often as we used to; these days we usually get called sisters. Then again, her little sister is two years younger than me!

 

[littlegirlslut]

I have always been attracted to older men. The most sexual and emotional and psychological pleasure I have received was with a man 19 years my senior. I have been told I have an old soul so maybe that has something to do with it.

 

[A's Sweet Baby]

I had never given age difference much thought .... had never given age much thought actually ...

I met Daddy on-line and fell in love with him before knowing his exact age (i did know he was older than me). I know that the outside world will look at us with raised eyebrows but I love him .... and he loves me .... and we have never been happier than when we are together. (there are 27 years between us)

 

[Richard49]

I had never given age difference much thought .... had never given age much thought actually ...

I met Daddy on-line and fell in love with him before knowing his exact age (i did know he was older than me). I know that the outside world will look at us with raised eyebrows but I love him .... and he loves me .... and we have never been happier than when we are together. (there are 27 years between us)

Are you together in real time/real life now?

 

[Wednesday'sRose]

I had never given age difference much thought .... had never given age much thought actually ...

I met Daddy on-line and fell in love with him before knowing his exact age (i did know he was older than me). I know that the outside world will look at us with raised eyebrows but I love him .... and he loves me .... and we have never been happier than when we are together. (there are 27 years between us)

Amen!!

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

No more than 20 years older, and probably not more than 3-4 years younger.