How To Seduce Women.

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Come on, how often do you get women writing poems about you.


Yes, yes I was bored and you are the funnest person on Lit!

Gee, probably 1971 was the last time. I oughta post my photo from those days so you wish you were 40 years older.

 

[StoneWorker]

Come on, how often do you get women writing poems about you.


Yes, yes I was bored and you are the funnest person on Lit!

Shes got a point, JBJ

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Eat Ur Heart Out Sp

 

[subdued_passion]

Gee, probably 1971 was the last time. I oughta post my photo from those days so you wish you were 40 years older.

Aww, just look at this pic of you. You do look pretty normal and cute. If I was around 40 years ago I may have agreed to be your victim... Although, considering I'm brown, I would've preferred the crime taking place in India and not the US.

Eat Ur Heart Out Sp

I can't help but notice you got the bottom bunk... Always suspected you to be more of a top kinda guy.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Aww, just look at this pic of you. You do look pretty normal and cute. If I was around 40 years ago I may have agreed to be your victim... Although, considering I'm brown, I would've preferred the crime taking place in India and not the US.





I can't help but notice you got the bottom bunk... Always suspected you to be more of a top kinda guy.

I am a top bunk guy and was, there. Top is the most dangerous in a war zone.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Mo Pix

 

[subdued_passion]

Mo Pix

I think it's rather brave and sweet of you (but this does not mean I am ready to be isolated yet... You're just gonna have to knock me unconscious for that) to be posting these pics so I'm gonna steer clear of all the obvious jokes that pop into my head when I see this one.

Naval wing, air force?

I am a top bunk guy

Now tell us more of your days as a 'top' man.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I think it's rather brave and sweet of you (but this does not mean I am ready to be isolated yet... You're just gonna have to knock me unconscious for that) to be posting these pics so I'm gonna steer clear of all the obvious jokes that pop into my head when I see this one.

Naval wing, air force?





Now tell us more of your days as a 'top' man.

AIR FORCE.

I'm the spawn of many of Western Civilization's Top Dogs. My pedigree is better than the Queen's. If I ruled Britain it would be grand again, and the men would cease to sing falsetto, and the women would stop delivering pianos. India's troubles started about the time our dynasty left Britain (Stuarts) and the Tea Company enslaved the world.

 

[subdued_passion]

India's troubles started about the time our dynasty left Britain (Stuarts) and the Tea Company enslaved the world.

Well, there was no "India" before the Raj, Bharat or Hindustan was just a bunch of princely states. In a way the British did help bring us together. And some of their social reforms is why today I , as a woman, have an education despite being a commoner.

Don't get me wrong I still hate the lot of them till they return the Kohinoor to me (I have felt it's loss the most).

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Well, there was no "India" before the Raj, Bharat or Hindustan was just a bunch of princely states. In a way the British did help bring us together. And some of their social reforms is why today I , as a woman, have an education despite being a commoner.

Don't get me wrong I still hate the lot of them till they return the Kohinoor to me (I have felt it's loss the most).

You don't need it, you probably look like the Taj Mahal in moonlight, anyway.

The Queen is about 1/2 American, as was Churchill, but theyre welcome to keep them.

 

[subdued_passion]

Mr. Johnson, it may not seem like it, but I have been paying attention and making notes.

You don't need it, you probably look like the Taj Mahal in moonlight, anyway.

To me the statement above sounds an awful lot like LESSON 3

LESSON 3
Once she's in close proximity, close enough to converse with normally, say something totally outrageous.

LESSON 4
Once youre confident she's interested what you wanna do is isolate her.

And I keep telling you the only way No 4 is happening with me is if I'm doused in chloroform.

Rainshine, can you please forget about the monogrammed towels and rape me already!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Mr. Johnson, it may not seem like it, but I have been paying attention and making notes.



To me the statement above sounds an awful lot like LESSON 3





And I keep telling you the only way No 4 is happening with me is if I'm doused in chloroform.

Rainshine, can you please forget about the monogrammed towels and rape me already!

RAINSHINE, alas, is flotsam in the great storm of life. She'll keep your head above water for a time.

I wrote a wonderful essay on tension, balance, and death a few minutes ago, then deleted it as silly futility in an effort to influence a novice. On the other hand a lighthouse cares nothing for how its warnings are used.

Ether works well, too.

 

[subdued_passion]

Pmann, you better takes notes coz now we're gonna get all technical with our rapey shit!

Ether works well, too.

Reasons I prefer to be drugged by chloroform vs ether:

1. Chloroform is quick to take effect- You'll suffer fewer injuries from my kicking and scratching.

2. Chloroform has a narcotic effect- So, who knows, in my high I may actually enjoy it and later wonder if maybe it was all for the better after all.

3. Chloroform is non-flammable- this is the most important one. Especially f you are the romantic rapist (which I'm beginning to suspect you are JBJ, what with your merlot and Taj Mahal references) and want to light some candles to set the mood, I'd like not to go up in flames before we get to the good stuff.

 

[NightL]

Oh the beguiling of uncle JimblyDribbleBits

seduction works in intriguing ways

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Pmann, you better takes notes coz now we're gonna get all technical with our rapey shit!



Reasons I prefer to be drugged by chloroform vs ether:

1. Chloroform is quick to take effect- You'll suffer fewer injuries from my kicking and scratching.

2. Chloroform has a narcotic effect- So, who knows, in my high I may actually enjoy it and later wonder if maybe it was all for the better after all.

3. Chloroform is non-flammable- this is the most important one. Especially f you are the romantic rapist (which I'm beginning to suspect you are JBJ, what with your merlot and Taj Mahal references) and want to light some candles to set the mood, I'd like not to go up in flames before we get to the good stuff.

Ether makes you giggle, chloroform simply knocks you out.

Lessons are lost on pbrain.

As I alluded to before, I have nothing to offer you, and wont cast pearls your way. I'm like Feike Asma; if you don't like what he does you wont likely enjoy what he does. Some prefer the mire to the throne.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9zkuPwS5xA

 

[NightL]

RAINSHINE, alas, is flotsam in the great storm of life.

then there is the jetsam - usually observed sinking

 

[subdued_passion]

Ether makes you giggle, chloroform simply knocks you out.

Once again, I prefer Chloroform because...

3. Chloroform is non-flammable- this is the most important one. Especially f you are the romantic rapist (which I'm beginning to suspect you are JBJ, what with your merlot and Taj Mahal references) and want to light some candles to set the mood, I'd like not to go up in flames before we get to the good stuff.

I'd rather not end up like an effigy of Ravana on the eve of Dussera.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Once again, I prefer Chloroform because...



I'd rather not end up like an effigy of Ravana on the eve of Dussera.

Seems like a good time to toss you on to the iggy pile.

 

[subdued_passion]

Seems like a good time to toss you on to the iggy pile.

You know it makes others jealous when you shower me with such PDA.

 

[subdued_passion]

Seems I'm quite buoyant. Try as it might, the storm can't seem to sink this wreckage.

Rainshine, *waves* almost missed you there. I hope you brought some rohypnol (coz you're class A and won't be bothered with crap like chloroform and ether).

 

[Lord Pmann]

RAINSHINE, alas, is flotsam in the great storm of life. She'll keep your head above water for a time.

I wrote a wonderful essay on tension, balance, and death a few minutes ago, then deleted it as silly futility in an effort to influence a novice. On the other hand a lighthouse cares nothing for how its warnings are used.

Ether works well, too.

JBJ... Fuck off.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Pmann, you better takes notes coz now we're gonna get all technical with our rapey shit!

I am not afraid of technicalities. I've actually been writing a dissertation of the best angle of penetration for a rape. I've actually got a few papers going on, much like JBJ. Here are some topics you can expect to see in the near future:

The Efficient Rapist: Which material absorbs chloroform best, without wasting precious rape products?

The Tidy Rapist: A how to on cleaning up those pesky DNA trails.

Force vs Finesse: An in depth look at drugging versus an old fashioned noggin cloggin'.

Defining Rape: Is it really rape if she was asking for it?

The Safest Rapist: Protecting yourself from those victims and their diseases.

Date Rape Isn't Rape At All

Increase Your Chances: How not to look like a rapist.

Duct Tape: Turning "no no no" into "mmm mmm mmm"

Those are just a few I'm working on. I am really hoping I get published. It'll most likely be in Maxim or something classy like that.

 

[subdued_passion]

I am not afraid of technicalities. I've actually been writing a dissertation of the best angle of penetration for a rape. I've actually got a few papers going on, much like JBJ. Here are some topics you can expect to see in the near future:

The Efficient Rapist: Which material absorbs chloroform best, without wasting precious rape products?

The Tidy Rapist: A how to on cleaning up those pesky DNA trails.

Force vs Finesse: An in depth look at drugging versus an old fashioned noggin cloggin'.

Defining Rape: Is it really rape if she was asking for it?

The Safest Rapist: Protecting yourself from those victims and their diseases.

Date Rape Isn't Rape At All

Increase Your Chances: How not to look like a rapist.

Duct Tape: Turning "no no no" into "mmm mmm mmm"

Those are just a few I'm working on. I am really hoping I get published. It'll most likely be in Maxim or something classy like that.

Pmann, this is brilliant stuff you're working on and i'm sure future rapists will be thankful for all the time and thought you've put into this.

I noticed you compared your starter attempts to the head of the Accreditation board, JBJ- good strategy there, sucking up to the legend to ensure your Rapey Uni is made legit.



BTW, visuals are a great teaching aide. Have you considered making a good PPT?

 

[Lord Pmann]

I hope to leave my mark on this earth (and my victim) as the world's premier Rapist Advocate. Calls me the Jesse Jackson of rapists. I will trumpet their cause for ages. I want people to look at me one day and say, "That Pmann... He truly was a rapist's rapist."

 

[subdued_passion]

I want people to look at me one day and say, "That Pmann... He truly was a rapist's rapist."

^^^sounds like Rapey Uni hazing.


Good way to teach them about 'Customer experience'.