I'm looking for more.

[intrigued]

Re: Re: Re: hello

My God, you have put into words what I have been feeling for so long, but unable to express. I have been out of my marriage for three years now, and it was celibate for a couple before that. I always thought it was me, but have found that through this site, I DO have the feelings and sexual needs that I was told were not there.

One thing I might suggest to kkceohcs, is a medical check up for his wife too. I was finally diagnosed with mild depression, and went on medication for about a year. Guess what....no more depression...and sexual interest has returned. It is not always the case, but even a mild depression, (and believe me, women in their early 40's have a large instance of undiagnosed depression) can affect how you feel about yourself, and your partner.

I am overjoyed to find my sexual, sensual self, before I dired up completely. Good luck.

Jade

Yes, you're right. I am one of those women....though I dumped the treatment because for me, I could not handle the side effects....weight gain, and decreased libido....and that was the last thing I needed. Its something that takes a great deal of time....you may have to try many different meds before you hit on just the right one. I had so many issues and the meds seemed to numb me and kept me from facing them. Thats when I finally decided to go it alone, and I let go of the meds, lost the weight, and started a little journey.....

And now a little more than a year later.....I have come a very long way. I went from frigid, unable to be intimate, repulsed by love and sex; I would hyperventilate during sex......to not having sex at all for years. (And still don't, but thats because I haven't found someone I'd like to with).....to this woman.....

.....its about 3/4 of the way down the page.......


http://www.literotica.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=87493&perpage=20&pagenumber=45

Believe me, there is help......when there is hope......and effort.

Thanks so much for sharing.

 

[Rooster]

Re: Re: Intrigued

You know, I didn't even realize that there is a chat room here, I think I've been spending way too much time in the Amateur Pics Feedback forum! ....

Hello Connie ..... nice to see ya venturing out ... Hope ya have fun.

 

[intrigued]

Re: Re: Re: Intrigued

Hello Connie ..... nice to see ya venturing out ... Hope ya have fun.

LOL...don't get too happy, I never have made it into chat. I don't do group chats very well, its too hard to keep up. I much prefer intimate little one~on~ones.

 

[Rooster]

Those are the best ... I can't keep up either

 

[kkceohcs]

Thanks and a big STIFF Hello

Barely and Intrigued, I wanted to thank you for your thoughts and openness. I got scared for a while of lit and the net. I came back and stumbled across the Pictures of each of you. After I picked up my jaw from the floor and my pants around my ankles all afternoon yesterday, It took 3x to go to sleep last night. You ladies are stunning. The threads I found proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that beauty is beyond skin deep, but it helps to have a great exterior.

Through your comments, I have decided for myself to change. Dropping 18lbs on the way to 50, I have stopped using food as my release. I am no longer embarrassed of being caught in the middle and extend an offer for her to help me finish. I have fought self esteem problems growing up from my father (oldest of 3 boys, 3 A's and 1 A- was not good enough) and a mother that just accepted what she was given (and still does). I believe that my problem was environmental, I in turn accepted the first comfortable love that was given (at least love as I knew).

Barely, What can I say about Lace and Stockings. Your pictures were incredible. It definitely left me wanting to know, see, feel so much more. Neatly trimmed (but not shaved if the shadows are correct), Lace and stockings w/ a garter is so over the top hot.

As to your suggestion of therapy, you know the saying "you can lead a horse to water". I believe that would be more detrimental to what it is that I do have? As a fragile diabetic, she already suffers from deep depression.

Intrigued, I don't know where to begin, I only wished IL was closer to SC. I think you are the kind of person to appreciate a surprise picnic in the park. I have always been a BIG fan of Marilyn Monroe. My favorite color is blue. I gained a tremendous insight to your response to my questions through your threads and comments. Please don't think of me as a stalker. I couldn't stop reading or looking. You started me on this journey, and I will be eternally grateful. If there is anything (and I mean anything) you think I could do for you, I'm at your becon call.

I have always tried to teach my step-daughter not to settle for/accept what is given, but to demand/expect more of what she feels and who she is with and communicate it. I am not encouraging her to be promiscius(sp?) but, at 20, she is pretty damn independent and confident of herself and her sexuality. (6'4" Blonde w/blue eyes). (p.s. it's a good thing I'm not incestous). I am open and honest w/ her about my wife & I's problems. There is no reason to be secretive. I don't believe that ignorance is bliss. I believe that only a thorugh discussion and knowledge of sex and alcohol can one receive the true education for a lifetime.


A dozen s to each of you.

and a if acceptable.

As I'm new to this, How do you keep track of all the threads you post to?

 

[intrigued]

Re: Thanks and a big STIFF Hello

Barely and Intrigued, I wanted to thank you for your thoughts and openness. I got scared for a while of lit and the net. I came back and stumbled across the Pictures of each of you. After I picked up my jaw from the floor and my pants around my ankles all afternoon yesterday, It took 3x to go to sleep last night. You ladies are stunning. The threads I found proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that beauty is beyond skin deep, but it helps to have a great exterior.

Through your comments, I have decided for myself to change. Dropping 18lbs on the way to 50, I have stopped using food as my release. I am no longer embarrassed of being caught in the middle and extend an offer for her to help me finish. I have fought self esteem problems growing up from my father (oldest of 3 boys, 3 A's and 1 A- was not good enough) and a mother that just accepted what she was given (and still does). I believe that my problem was environmental, I in turn accepted the first comfortable love that was given (at least love as I knew).

Barely, What can I say about Lace and Stockings. Your pictures were incredible. It definitely left me wanting to know, see, feel so much more. Neatly trimmed (but not shaved if the shadows are correct), Lace and stockings w/ a garter is so over the top hot.

As to your suggestion of therapy, you know the saying "you can lead a horse to water". I believe that would be more detrimental to what it is that I do have? As a fragile diabetic, she already suffers from deep depression.

Intrigued, I don't know where to begin, I only wished IL was closer to SC. I think you are the kind of person to appreciate a surprise picnic in the park. I have always been a BIG fan of Marilyn Monroe. My favorite color is blue. I gained a tremendous insight to your response to my questions through your threads and comments. Please don't think of me as a stalker. I couldn't stop reading or looking. You started me on this journey, and I will be eternally grateful. If there is anything (and I mean anything) you think I could do for you, I'm at your becon call.

I have always tried to teach my step-daughter not to settle for/accept what is given, but to demand/expect more of what she feels and who she is with and communicate it. I am not encouraging her to be promiscius(sp?) but, at 20, she is pretty damn independent and confident of herself and her sexuality. (6'4" Blonde w/blue eyes). (p.s. it's a good thing I'm not incestous). I am open and honest w/ her about my wife & I's problems. There is no reason to be secretive. I don't believe that ignorance is bliss. I believe that only a thorugh discussion and knowledge of sex and alcohol can one receive the true education for a lifetime.


A dozen s to each of you.

and a if acceptable.

As I'm new to this, How do you keep track of all the threads you post to?

OMG.

Listen, I can't see through these tears to type. I will have to come back in a bit and address this as it needs to be addressed.

I cant think straight, but there is an option either in your contol panel...oh heck, its somewhere, in which you can choose to subscribe to a thread. Also, when you reply to one, you can check the box for "email notification" that will alert you when there is a reply to a thread that you have replied to.

Back soon......thank you so much. Nothing has ever touched me so.

 

[kkceohcs]

Intrigued, I'm So Sorry

I never intended for you to cry. I'm not so sure what it was I said. Maybe I should listen to my self talk and hear later. Poor movie reference.

I sit in my Office all day getting paid to work when all I can do is sit here and lurk? Is that really what I am doing or is there some other word do describe the longing to touch. Have someone touch me from reading and dreaming of these pictures before me. I know it is a FIREABLE offense, but I can't help it. I am obsessed with overwhelming passion. I am not looking to be single, but swapping bodily fluids with a hot blooded female when you live with an ice cube is grounds for divorce.


May all your nights be Hot and Moist, then you go to sleep.

P.S. OMG=oh my god?

 

[intrigued]

Re: Thanks and a big STIFF Hello

Barely and Intrigued, I wanted to thank you for your thoughts and openness. I got scared for a while of lit and the net. I came back and stumbled across the Pictures of each of you. After I picked up my jaw from the floor and my pants around my ankles all afternoon yesterday, It took 3x to go to sleep last night. You ladies are stunning. The threads I found proved beyond the shadow of a doubt that beauty is beyond skin deep, but it helps to have a great exterior.


Through your comments, I have decided for myself to change. Dropping 18lbs on the way to 50, I have stopped using food as my release. I am no longer embarrassed of being caught in the middle and extend an offer for her to help me finish. I have fought self esteem problems growing up from my father (oldest of 3 boys, 3 A's and 1 A- was not good enough) and a mother that just accepted what she was given (and still does). I believe that my problem was environmental, I in turn accepted the first comfortable love that was given (at least love as I knew).

Barely, What can I say about Lace and Stockings. Your pictures were incredible. It definitely left me wanting to know, see, feel so much more. Neatly trimmed (but not shaved if the shadows are correct), Lace and stockings w/ a garter is so over the top hot.

As to your suggestion of therapy, you know the saying "you can lead a horse to water". I believe that would be more detrimental to what it is that I do have? As a fragile diabetic, she already suffers from deep depression.

Intrigued, I don't know where to begin, I only wished IL was closer to SC. I think you are the kind of person to appreciate a surprise picnic in the park. I have always been a BIG fan of Marilyn Monroe. My favorite color is blue. I gained a tremendous insight to your response to my questions through your threads and comments. Please don't think of me as a stalker. I couldn't stop reading or looking. You started me on this journey, and I will be eternally grateful. If there is anything (and I mean anything) you think I could do for you, I'm at your becon call.

I have always tried to teach my step-daughter not to settle for/accept what is given, but to demand/expect more of what she feels and who she is with and communicate it. I am not encouraging her to be promiscius(sp?) but, at 20, she is pretty damn independent and confident of herself and her sexuality. (6'4" Blonde w/blue eyes). (p.s. it's a good thing I'm not incestous). I am open and honest w/ her about my wife & I's problems. There is no reason to be secretive. I don't believe that ignorance is bliss. I believe that only a thorugh discussion and knowledge of sex and alcohol can one receive the true education for a lifetime.


A dozen s to each of you.

and a if acceptable.

As I'm new to this, How do you keep track of all the threads you post to?

You have said so much, that I wish I knew how to quote each section that I wish to respond to, I'm afraid I will miss something.

Thank you very much for the compliments on my pics. I am really pleased that you enjoyed them so, and that you saw behind the obvious. I believe ones sensuality and sexuality can be felt every bit as much as seen, and that it does not require one to blast themselves in entire nudity. Thank you for appreciating me as I am, and with my lingerie still in place.

I completely understand why you feel so much of your behavior and mind set is "environmental" as you put it. Children learn what they live, and I am a relatively good example of that, and yet, I am also an example of one that rose above and fought against it, and now I am the very opposite of the way I was raised.
You have to be sick to death of your existance before you can truly change it. Its hard...and you will have good and bad times with it. It is scary, you will feel like running and hiding, but you get through it. One of the things I taught myself to do was to take my greatest fears and make myself mentally go through a process of "what ifs"...in my mind, I would put myself in the position of facing each part of what it was that I feared. An example, which may seem minor to you, but I lived it, and it was a very difficult thing to endure, was my compulsive need to unplug every single appliance in my home before I could leave it. Yes, even the fridge, washer...everything. And that wasn't all, I could not convince myself that I had actually done it, so I had to do it repeatedly. Anyone with me and waiting on me knew to just get cozy, I would be awhile.
The reason I did this was that I was terrified of losing my home, and fire was my greatest fear. I have lost so much, my home was the one thing I had to give to my children, and it was the core of my family, as everyones home is. it took me a very long time, but I finally faced it, and made myself face head on, in my mind, each component of it...what I would feel to arrive home and find my house burning, or worse, burnt to the ground.
Then.....what I would do...how I would react.... then, the clean up, then...."what the hell now"??? it took me months of going through this process in my mind, a little at a time. And in my mind, it was as if it was happening...it was so very real; I was trembling and crying and almost hysterical, BUT, I realized that, like most of us, I would survive it. I would take another step, and another, and simply survive it.

In my journey sexually, dealing with rape and being "sexuallly lost" for 30 years, the end of a marriage....all of it is sheer will, sheer aching for a better, complete and fulfilling life. I am almost there.

I am so proud of you, for several reasons. First, for opening up, and in your way, releasing.....and also, seeking a little help. So many people, in their darkest times, just cannot ask for someone to even TALK to them...in our darkest times, we are more afraid. You reached out as best you could, right here in a place that gave you a little hope. SO DID I. You've been through my pic thread....did you see what so many have told me they saw.....a flower just beginning to bloom??? (Pardon my cheesiness, but it says it best.) I am blooming, I am shining, I am feeling so much like a 41 year old woman should feel inside about her womanhood. Finally.
I am now at peace.

I am also proud of you regarding your weight loss. You will be amazed at how good it will feel to look at yourself in the mirror....you will just be grinning and thinking "wow!!". The meds I took off and on through the years put 50 pounds on me rather quickly, and it was the single most destructive thing that happened to me emotionally since I was a little girl. I have been a small thin woman all my life, and suddenly, I felt like a frumpy old housewife, and it was a pain I dont wish to recall for even one minute. I understand, I promise you, and I want you to know that as long as you are doing this for YOU, you can do it. You've already proven that. I am so proud of you!!

If Lit helps you and gives you hope, stop the guilt please? What is the guilt accomplishing??? Explore....in the process, express yourself, even if its only WITH yourself, and TO yourself.
This site exposed me to so much that for my entire adulthood, was, in my mind...filth. Yes. I was so full of guilt and shame about my sexuality, and so locked up inside that a simple deep kiss turned my stomach. Just look at me now....and before, I was a woman that had three orgasms in her life. Three. A couple weeks ago, that number grew to four, through experiences I have encountered at Lit, through my struggle to heal and to change...I finally learned that yes, I can feel. It was through masturbation, but hell, it WORKED. Thats all that matters to me. Now I know....and I am on my way.
Hey, its a start.

I have already addressed the issues regarding your wife and marriage, so I won't reiterate that. I just want you to feel the hope...I certainly do. I feel so much hope for you, I can taste it.

Regarding your daughter.....Kudos!!!!!!! There is nothing at all that I can add.....you are doing excellent!

I wish I could let you know somehow, how much it means to me that you are trying to change your existance. Its simply NEVER TOO LATE. I admire you, and I am pulling for you.


Take care, and let me hear from you, I wish to know how its going.

 

[mbb308]

Thank you....

for turning me on to the site. I think this may work out after all.

 

[mbb308]

last night's PM

Sorry about last night's short PM - wasn't being snippy - just trying to fit 10 lbs of stuff into a 5 lb bag. Try again???

 

[kkceohcs]

Hello

Just checking in to see if anyone is here????

HHHHHEEEEELLLLLLLLLOOOOOOO.

Guess not.

 

[kkceohcs]

hello?