Is this true for other young women?

[none_sequitur]

Everyone is different, but...

I think that the statement is true in many cases, partly reflecting some physiological differences, but probably mostly due to societal conditioning. But partner choice is an important factor to. I once dated an 18 year old girl (I was much older), and even though she had plenty of "experience", it had all been with guys her age. She was convinced that she could only orgasm through manual or oral stimulation.
Luckily I was able to prove her wrong

 

[jenibee]

I've truly enjoyed sex since I was 18. I'm 29 now. Granted, I'm married to my high school sweetheart, and we are very sexually active (and polyamorous), but I think the notion of younger girls not enjoying sex is generally ridiculous.

Lust is a helluva drug. Even before we had intercourse, we were having oral sex, and handjobs/fingering before that. We're the same age fwiw, and I was definitely doing all of the initiating. (There's just something about a socially inept nerd that turns me on.)

 

[sweetmoonbeam]

They used to say women reached their sexual peak in the their 30's, but of course there are individual differences. I've heard that the latest research says that women's sexuality is more malleable, less specific, then men's overall, which biologically makes sense. If men's sexuality as a gender is about spreading that seed to propagate the species, that would be the driving impulse. Women being able to be a bit more adaptable would help the species continue, it seems. This is what I remember from what I read...I see they called it 'malleable'. You can look for references if you're interested. (The Handbook of Sexuality in Close Relationships John H. Harvey, Amy Wenzel, Susan Sprecher seems to discuss this but I don't know where I saw it) But that would explain what you're saying. What women experience as not being as clear about their sexuality, more often taking a while to really find their way could be part of that. There are other forces too, in that society accepts men's sexuality more than women's still, many cultures seeming to fear women's sexuality. I think I see it in here even. Men can seem to list a few sex acts they want to do, what turns them on, but seem to wonder why women can't in the same way. That sex is more diffuse for women often (not always), more part of a whole context, often including emotions, those bonding hormones kicking in, and maybe that's part of why it takes longer for us to really totally uncover what turns us on. Not sure about any of this, but it's interesting to think about. Also, can you picture the world if women's sexuality WAS like men's????? Who would bother staying around to raise the children? I'm joking, but I see some truth in that.

Great post. I like the evolutionary perspective. Here's a visual I stumbled across today, coincidentally, that seems to illustrate your point:

Life gets inordinately better as you get older. It really does, in all sorts of ways, not just sexually. I wish someone had told me this when I was younger. I would have spent less time moping about and wondering, "Is this really it?" I blame Hollywood and the advertising industry.

Oddly enough, experiencing child birth made me a much more passionate person when all was said and done. It forced me to get in touch with my body on an almost supernatural level. And, something magical happened after child birth wherein I no longer cared what anybody thought of my body, or my manners for that matter. I had verifiable proof that I could be a goddess, a warrior, and a superhero all in one night, and I had done it all practically naked in front of a steady stream of strangers. Lastly, it made me realize that women are naturally amazing for what they can do with their minds, bodies, instincts, and wills no matter what "ideal" is currently being shoved at them by Hollywood and Madison Avenue.

Pullmyhair3717, congratulations on your pregnancy. I highly recommend going natural if you can. (PM me if you want to talk about this.) It's wonderful to hear that you're in, what sounds to be, a very loving relationship. You are about to get 5000 times even more sexier in his eyes. Your open mind and the fact that you're already so in touch with your body bodes very well for the upcoming birth, and the rest of your life as well. He's a very lucky guy.

 

[VanillaLipgloss]

I'm 27 y/o. I started having sex when I was 18. I have never really enjoyed penetration. Maybe once or twice I liked it at most. I never "loved" it. I've actually admitted this to my friends (same age as me) and they all think I'm crazy. hehe I would much rather just get head than to have sex, but most guys wouldn't live with just oral sex all the time. So unfortunately for most of the time I'm in bed I'm bored out of my mind.

Just to add a bit more info. I also have never been in a "real" relationship. So that may have something to do with it too.

 

[PhilGarlic]

what do I know?

From a mans view, recent surveys have found that young males are viewing hard porn three times a week. It was also found that lots of the men were thinking that this hard porn is how you should fuck your girlfriend, while a few girls may take to this like a duck to water, I think most would like to build to this type of sex over a long term relationship. In lots of porn you won't see a guy go down on a girl and therefore this isn't happening, but lots of girls are going down on guys, and so the girls are doing this because it's expected.

I married my school days girlfriend, and I know our sex life developed over a few years, with us trying new things still to this day, I think I work hard at getting the wife to have good sex as she will with me, but I know at a younger age I was not as selfless!

So yeah, with the easy access to hard porn and the expectation that this is how all girls behave, a lot of young girls may not be getting the best from sex they could.

 

[PhilGarlic]

real relationship.

I'm 27 y/o. I started having sex when I was 18. I have never really enjoyed penetration. Maybe once or twice I liked it at most. I never "loved" it. I've actually admitted this to my friends (same age as me) and they all think I'm crazy. hehe I would much rather just get head then have sex, but most guys wouldn't live with just oral sex all the time. So unfortunately for most of the time I'm in bed I'm bored out of my mind.

Just to add a bit more info. I also have never been in a "real" relationship. So that may have something to do with it too.

I guess you are waiting for the right guy, for me sex starts in the head!

 

[ChinaBandit]

The problem when you are young is inexperience. I think-there is usually a lack of it with your first partners too. No one in my peer group ever gave it up to a man that knew what he was doing. Me neither. Thinking back-it was always about his pleasure. They knew nothing else. It was not until sex with a more mature man-not boys even if in 20's-that I learned how to have pleasure. It was a real surprise to learn that I could actually use his cock-for me (SMILE). I am only 36. Now I know everything and it is better. I think it sad my older sisters know but one man. China changed a lot during my maturity. Women have more opportunity, can I say.

AND-the first few times hurt like a man can't imagine. So this is sex? Terrible. Now-can I get enough?

I wish to also say something that may upset people. As I got more experience-I learned how being sexually pleasing can bring many nice things to you door that would otherwise not be there.

Kisses,

Lorena

 

[Marlene38EE]

So driving to work this morning on the radio they were having a discussion about young women and their sexuality. Their opinion was that women don't really ENJOY sex until they are in their late 20s if not early 30s and that they simply do it to keep their man happy! I automatically disagreed, but strangely enough every caller they had completely agreed with them! Im 22 years old and have throughly enjoyed sex since around age 19. I crave it and cant get enough. Granted I LOVE keeping my man happy, I dont just go through the motions for his enjoyment... Do any young females really feel they dont enjoy sex right now? Or are there any older females who didnt enjoy sex until later in life??? Does it really get THAT much better?? Curious to know....

Simply put, the people hosting that radio show know nothing about feminine sexuality, obviously enough.
You have your own experiences of proof that they haven't the first clue as to what they're talking about and don't forget that radio shows screen callers on a 10 'Agree' to 1 'Disagree' ratio.
And most people calling in to those shows are 'suck-ups' trying to garner five minutes of fame and feel special.
I'm 28, and while I have a much better idea of my personal tastes, likes and dislikes now...I wouldn't say I enjoy sex more, I'd say i know how to get more out of an encounter.

 

[HeyItsDani]

The problem when you are young is inexperience. I think-there is usually a lack of it with your first partners too. No one in my peer group ever gave it up to a man that knew what he was doing. Me neither. Thinking back-it was always about his pleasure. They knew nothing else. It was not until sex with a more mature man-not boys even if in 20's-that I learned how to have pleasure. It was a real surprise to learn that I could actually use his cock-for me (SMILE). I am only 36. Now I know everything and it is better. I think it sad my older sisters know but one man. China changed a lot during my maturity. Women have more opportunity, can I say.

AND-the first few times hurt like a man can't imagine. So this is sex? Terrible. Now-can I get enough?

Truer words were never spoken.

When I was in high school (a senior), I realized that the guys I was dating just weren't mature and experienced enough for me (or, as I saw in those days, didn't have the stamina I wanted). That probably sounds bad, but it was during this period I began to seriously enjoy what I could do with other girls, so it didn't turn out all for naught. Heh.

I knew at the time older guys would probably be better suited toward my sexual temperament, but in a small town where everyone knows everyone else, that option wasn't generally available to me. So I decided to go to college a long, long way from home, and then spent some time exploring my sexuality on my own terms. I'm not going waste everyone's time rambling about all of that, though. I just wanted to echo and QFT what she said. I wish there was some way to better educate kids in HS what it means to be sexual and how to enjoy it. I believe that would go a long way toward reducing a lot of the sexual dissatisfaction everyone experiences.

I wish to also say something that may upset people. As I got more experience-I learned how being sexually pleasing can bring many nice things to you door that would otherwise not be there.

It may upset people, but it sure is true.

 

[HeyItsDani]

I completely disagree with that, I 100% believe you can enjoy sex at any time your ready, I'm 16 and love sex!

I thought you weren't supposed to be on Lit unless you were 18?

 

[Marlene38EE]

Guess I dodged a bullet...

The problem when you are young is inexperience. I think-there is usually a lack of it with your first partners too. No one in my peer group ever gave it up to a man that knew what he was doing. Me neither. Thinking back-it was always about his pleasure. They knew nothing else. It was not until sex with a more mature man-not boys even if in 20's-that I learned how to have pleasure. It was a real surprise to learn that I could actually use his cock-for me (SMILE). I am only 36. Now I know everything and it is better. I think it sad my older sisters know but one man. China changed a lot during my maturity. Women have more opportunity, can I say.

AND-the first few times hurt like a man can't imagine. So this is sex? Terrible. Now-can I get enough?

I wish to also say something that may upset people. As I got more experience-I learned how being sexually pleasing can bring many nice things to you door that would otherwise not be there.

Kisses,

Lorena

My first times didn't hurt, somewhat uncomfortable in a newly-weird feeling way...but the guy didn't just slam into me either, he almost killed it all by always stopping to ask;
"You're okay, I'm not hurting you? You're sure?"
Almost killed the encounter with compassion...
by the fifth time, I had a decent idea of things and when he started his compassionate-panic, I grabbed him by his ears, made him look me in the eyes and said, point-blank;
"Two words; Fuck Me!"

He got the hint.

 

[vibes]

I grabbed him by his ears, made him look me in the eyes and said, point-blank;
"Two words; Fuck Me!"

Oh shit

 

[Marlene38EE]

I didn't hurt him...much.

Oh shit

I didn't hurt him at all, I just wanted to be certain I had his full attention and he was looking into my eyes and not my breasts so that I'd be understood...you know, communication.

 

[vibes]

I didn't hurt him at all, I just wanted to be certain I had his full attention and he was looking into my eyes and not my breasts so that I'd be understood...you know, communication.

I think I do know, Marlene: simple chosen words uttered or whispered with the right intonation and glance do wonder

 

[Marlene38EE]

You didn't know this guy

I think I do know, Marlene: simple chosen words uttered or whispered with the right intonation and glance do wonder

Ever dated a guy who has the attention-span of a cocker-spaniel puppy that's guzzled a RedBull??
...that and he was always looking at my chest, so much he almost left eye-prints.
So, a slightly drastic measure was called for.
He thought it was funny as hell when he was telling his friends about it.

 

[fucktoy4sadist]

So driving to work this morning on the radio they were having a discussion about young women and their sexuality. Their opinion was that women don't really ENJOY sex until they are in their late 20s if not early 30s and that they simply do it to keep their man happy! I automatically disagreed, but strangely enough every caller they had completely agreed with them! Im 22 years old and have throughly enjoyed sex since around age 19. I crave it and cant get enough. Granted I LOVE keeping my man happy, I dont just go through the motions for his enjoyment... Do any young females really feel they dont enjoy sex right now? Or are there any older females who didnt enjoy sex until later in life??? Does it really get THAT much better?? Curious to know....

I haven't read the rest of the threat yet, but NO NO NO....I loved sex from the first time I did it [Age violation removed] ( I won't be more specific, since it's probably against Lit rules lol) I loved sex before I did it. I wanted it and I begged for it!

 

[cherryRUST]

I'm a psych student and we just did this in class a few weeks ago. It's not that we don't enjoy sex before we reach our late 20's/early 30's, it's that more women report sexual satisfaction at that time. They believe of course, that this is due to more experienced partners and better understandings of one's own body. It's a subjective thing, hence all the differing opinions. But mostly it's not to do with enjoyment, but the reported satisfaction of a select number of women surveyed.

 

[ChinaBandit]

My husband and I are laughing about it as this is posted-but first time I rode a bike to my boyfriend's and had to WALK it back to my house. I was sore! I also had to worry about my mother finding blood drips in my panties. You can't hide anything from a Chinese mother. She would know it is not my period time. All funny, years later.

Kisses,

Lorena

 

[pisces_girl]

False! My libido is crazy and I enjoy sex a lot. BUT sadly, some young guys aren't on the same page. They're so focused on the quick fixes and aren't up to explore as much... in my opinion/experience.

 

[vibes]

Ever dated a guy who has the attention-span of a cocker-spaniel puppy that's guzzled a RedBull??

Never, I promise

 

[switchbitch]

So driving to work this morning on the radio they were having a discussion about young women and their sexuality. Their opinion was that women don't really ENJOY sex until they are in their late 20s if not early 30s and that they simply do it to keep their man happy! I automatically disagreed, but strangely enough every caller they had completely agreed with them! Im 22 years old and have throughly enjoyed sex since around age 19. I crave it and cant get enough. Granted I LOVE keeping my man happy, I dont just go through the motions for his enjoyment... Do any young females really feel they dont enjoy sex right now? Or are there any older females who didnt enjoy sex until later in life??? Does it really get THAT much better?? Curious to know....

I have always enjoyed sex, but then I was somewhat precocious and knew precisely what I wanted and how to get it. But I do have to say that it has got even better as I have aged, I do not know whether that is simply that learned techniques improveyour capacity for enjoyment but it does indeed get better and better at least for me this is true.