Let’s talk about the female orgasm

[lil_jenni]

Two things. First, y'all need to realize that everyone is different, and some of the signs guys seem to think come () with orgasms may not be there in some women and may not be there with some women sometimes but will be others. That's because women are different from each other and have different responses, and orgasms are also may be different from each other and have different effects. For me, sometimes I'm very loud when I orgasm and sometimes I'm very quiet. Sometimes I have body shaking orgasms and sometimes my body tenses and I don't move at all during climax. Sometimes, even my Hubby, who knows my body extremely well, isn't sure when I've come because it will be one of the little ones where I don't make noise or move or anything like that. So... the more you know.

Second, clitoral stimulation is the sure fire winner for me, except when it's not. Sometimes it's too much. Conversely, sometimes it's not enough if delivered by another person who doesn't know what he's doing (never been a problem with Hubby, though, or any woman I've been with).

Penetration works for me most of the time with Hubby (but irregularly before him), but it depends on a variety of factors, not all of which are physical. And anal penetration alone works a bit more than half the time, even though some people say it's impossible.

On the other hand, nipple play, spanking, giving a BJ, being face fucked when I'm really in the mood for it, etc. do not make me come. I'm kinda envious of women who say these work for them. For me, they just make me extremely ready, to the point I may explode the moment I'm penetrated or if my clit is touched.

 

[MakeMeWetAF]

Glad you enjoyed. We just had a very lengthy and intense session of her watching me this morning. And afterwords we spoke about how no matter how good and attentive your lover is, you know all of your spots and pleasure zones.

But when your partner can also do that… AND find new ones or ones you didn’t know you have…

>WOW<

Sounds like a delicious session you both had. Such a good feeling having someone as curious about what turns you on as you are about them. Such mutual and intimate desire between you both. Just a really raw and sexy vulnerability about it. Like it's your own little secret between the two of you. And yes!!! Always things to learn from eachother

 

[lil_jenni]

I just asked Hubby how he knows I've orgasmed. Now, I love that man to death, but asking him questions like that are frought with peril because he's gonna go with the lawyer answer ("it depends") about 99% of the time. This time, I thought he might not because his first response was "Your 'fucks' get more frequent and higher pitched then stop abruptly." You see, 'fuck' in some from comes out of mouth a good bit during sex. And he's right... when I'm being vocal. But then I asked him about physiological responses, and I got the "it depends" response. Fucking lawyer.

Anyway, he told me it could sometimes be difficult when I'm not vocal because my arousal responses overlap and interchange with orgasmic responses. For example, I often get goose bumps on my arms and chest when I come. But sometimes that happens when I get really aroused but haven't come. And he said the same is true with respect to my face and chest flushing, my lips quivering, my respiration, my eye movements, my vagina tightening (although, I can do that at will with kegals), my body shuddering, etc. all of them can be signs of orgasm or of arousal. He said he looks for several to coincide and how I act after the suspected orgasm. He said I tend to get very energetic again, especially after my first orgasm. He then said it's really the totality of what's happening rather than any particular tells, and that abrupt changes in my responses often occur when I come, it's just it's not always the same responses and changes .

I asked about the times he is least certain, and he told me sometimes it is almost impossible for him to tell, because I'm either exhibiting few physiological signs of arousal/orgasm or I'm exhibiting a lot of them for a long period of time and he can't see any particular change.

 

[FatPhim]

I’m learning that the variety and diversity in physical and emotional responses is enormous, but mostly I’m learning that communication is key.

Thank you so much to the ladies sharing their experiences, it’s powerful and enlightening.

 

[ffdan]

I had a friend I meant on here several years ago. We would video chat from time to time and when she really got into it camera would be more on her feet than her vagina. I could tell she came by the way she curled her toes and rotated feet inward.

 

[FatPhim]

I

I just asked Hubby how he knows I've orgasmed. Now, I love that man to death, but asking him questions like that are fought with peril because he's gonna go with the lawyer answer ("it depends") about 99% of the time. This time, I thought he might not because his first response was "Your 'fucks' get more frequent and higher pitched then stop abruptly." You see, 'fuck' in some from comes out of mouth a good bit during sex. And he's right... when I'm being vocal. But then I asked him about physiological responses, and I got the "it depends" response. Fucking lawyer.

Anyway, he told me it could sometimes be difficult when I'm not vocal because my arousal responses overlap and interchange with orgasmic responses. For example, I often get goose bumps on my arms and chest when I come. But sometimes that happens when I get really aroused but haven't come. And he said the same is true with respect to my face and chest flushing, my lips quivering, my respiration, my eye movements, my vagina tightening (although, I can do that at will with kegals), my body shuddering, etc. all of them can be signs of orgasm or of arousal. He said he looks for several to coincide and how I act after the suspected orgasm. He said I tend to get very energetic again, especially after my first orgasm. He then said it's really the totality of what's happening rather than any particular tells, and that abrupt changes in my responses often occur when I come, it's just it's not always the same responses and changes .

I asked about the times he is least certain, and he told me sometimes it is almost impossible for him to tell, because I'm either exhibiting few physiological signs of arousal/orgasm or I'm exhibiting a lot of them for a long period of time and he can't see any particular change

I achieve orgasm very easily both with my partner; through solo pussy, clit and tit play or; or purely through my wild imagination coinciding with the slightest brush of my erect nipples or clit. I am an insatiable little fucker who is ALWAYS wet and ready to play so I guess I could say I'm almost always halfway to a BIG O when I/we play.

My favourite orgasm is definitely a clit and g banger of an O - the two feel sooooo good when they coincide, my legs and pussy can jolt for hours after climax. I also love pure clit orgasms.

My man's fingers and tongue on and in my pussy drive me wild. I love his meaty cock too but for orgasm, fingers and tongue and sucking on my clit and nips are where it's at. I don't fixate on achieving orgasm as they're a daily experience for me and I enjoy sex and masturbation and all that it encompasses.

My favourite toys/products for whipping my pussy into a super wet frenzy and hitting the BIG O are my thick 10inch beaded glass dildo (I love the weight and girth of it in my pussy and being packed tight/stretched out, also that I can do temperature play with glass - it goes in cold and comes out hot and coated with my cum), clit pleasure gel (Ignite by Love Honey) and my We-Tango Bullet Vibe...I have 3 of these I (my pussy) love them so much.

My sensations get very heightened when partially dressed and in a risque pose by an open window or outside. Love being watched and watching my partner.

My solo sessions always involve indulging in some literotica, audio erotica or porn before and often throughout my solo play. It sends my quivering cunt and tits through the roof. Sooo fucking good all those crazy sensations.

I've been edging today with the exception of a beautiful morning fuck with my man. Now having some solo time and WELL on my way to a delicious, thigh shaking, hip bucking, pussy clenching and drenching clitoral orgasm. Relishing every sensation from my hard swollen nipples, to my NEEDY little cunt, and my toe curling ecstasy.

I hope you're all enjoying yourselves as much as my pussy and tits are. In second heaven right now

You are a one-woman literary tornado of erotica. Words fail me, you are awesome. Thank you for sharing

 

[Goldenfinger]

I’m jealous of my wife. She can have multiple orgasms and from different areas. She has what she calls inside and outside orgasms and deep orgasms. Outside orgasms are from clitoral stimulation, inside is from penetrative sex and deep orgasms are from rubbing the cervix. They all seem to get a different response.

 

[Scotchlander]

It surprises me that amount of ladies who cannot orgasm during penetration.

I like to have lots of foreplay and have the lady orgasm using my tongue usually more than once.

The last three ladies I had sex with all finished with an orgasm while riding my cock.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I rarely orgasm during sex. A rhythm that feels good to my partner, is usually not the same rhythm that *I* need to get off. I can come pretty reliably with my fingers though—or even better—a vibe pressed directly on my clit. Even then, I’m very quiet, just a little sigh or “mmm-mmm-mmm”. No thrashing around or screaming.

I’m more flamboyant when I’m with my husband, because I know he likes seeing me come, and it’s kind of fun to put on a show for him … .

 

[Vitriolhack]

I rarely orgasm during sex. A rhythm that feels good to my partner, is usually not the same rhythm that *I* need to get off. I can come pretty reliably with my fingers though—or even better—a vibe pressed directly on my clit. Even then, I’m very quiet, just a little sigh or “mmm-mmm-mmm”. No thrashing around or screaming.

I’m more flamboyant when I’m with my husband, because I know he likes seeing me come, and it’s kind of fun to put on a show for him … .

Many love to see their partner come, the satisfaction of a job well done.

 

[Iwant2havefun]

Question for the ladies here. my GF rarely comes from penetration, but almost always from my tongue, which both of us really enjoy. i love to lick her pussy to a satisfying orgasm, and she likes me inside her afterwards, but almost never has a second orgasm. Other times (maybe 40% of the times we're intimate) she likes to suck me until i come or have me fuck her, with no expectation she'll have an orgasm. She says it's all for me, and that she just enjoys the feeling of togetherness, even without the orgasm.

i'm happy if she's happy, and this all seems to work for us....just wondering if any other ladies have the same feeling? Only one orgasm, and only about half the time we're together? If this is all true for her, that's ok. i just don't want to be an inattentive or selfish lover, while she's secretly fantasizing about a huge cock making her come over and over again....

 

[lil_jenni]

Question for the ladies here. my GF rarely comes from penetration, but almost always from my tongue, which both of us really enjoy. i love to lick her pussy to a satisfying orgasm, and she likes me inside her afterwards, but almost never has a second orgasm. Other times (maybe 40% of the times we're intimate) she likes to suck me until i come or have me fuck her, with no expectation she'll have an orgasm. She says it's all for me, and that she just enjoys the feeling of togetherness, even without the orgasm.

i'm happy if she's happy, and this all seems to work for us....just wondering if any other ladies have the same feeling? Only one orgasm, and only about half the time we're together? If this is all true for her, that's ok. i just don't want to be an inattentive or selfish lover, while she's secretly fantasizing about a huge cock making her come over and over again....

I have a question. Do you ever lick her to more than one? If not, is she the one who wants to move on to penetration? She may get too sensitive from direct stimulation to have more than one. Indirect stimulation may provide her a break.

But as to your ultimate question, I'd say if she really wants to have sex even when she has no expectation of climaxing (as opposed to just having sex to accommodate your desires), she's probably satisfied. I can't speak for all women of course, but myself and my friends I've talked to about stuff like those pretty much all agree that we don't expect a climax every time and that the act can be enjoyable without climaxing. Before I met my husband, I almost never came from penetration alone. With Hubby, it is most of the time but not all the time. I have off nights, and on those nights, unless something is physically wrong, I still very much enjoy sex with him. It's the togetherness in part, but also arousal itself can be quite fun, even without an orgasm.

So, if she's enjoying sex with you and continues to want sex with you, you're probably good.

 

[Iwant2havefun]

I have a question. Do you ever lick her to more than one? If not, is she the one who wants to move on to penetration? She may get too sensitive from direct stimulation to have more than one. Indirect stimulation may provide her a break.

But as to your ultimate question, I'd say if she really wants to have sex even when she has no expectation of climaxing (as opposed to just having sex to accommodate your desires), she's probably satisfied. I can't speak for all women of course, but myself and my friends I've talked to about stuff like those pretty much all agree that we don't expect a climax every time and that the act can be enjoyable without climaxing. Before I met my husband, I almost never came from penetration alone. With Hubby, it is most of the time but not all the time. I have off nights, and on those nights, unless something is physically wrong, I still very much enjoy sex with him. It's the togetherness in part, but also arousal itself can be quite fun, even without an orgasm.

So, if she's enjoying sex with you and continues to want sex with you, you're probably good.

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond, it's very helpful! No, VERY rarely will she let me lick her to more than one (I always try!) because she says she's too sensitive and instead wants to move to penetration or giving me a blowjob. i consider myself very lucky, in that i feel our sex life is good, especially with the many posts i've read of partners who have zero interest in sex, ever. While i'm a little envious of those couples where partners seem to come and come easily, i'm not complaining. i am definitely in a loving and fulfilling relationship, and for that i'm grateful!

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I have a question. Do you ever lick her to more than one? If not, is she the one who wants to move on to penetration? She may get too sensitive from direct stimulation to have more than one. Indirect stimulation may provide her a break.

But as to your ultimate question, I'd say if she really wants to have sex even when she has no expectation of climaxing (as opposed to just having sex to accommodate your desires), she's probably satisfied. I can't speak for all women of course, but myself and my friends I've talked to about stuff like those pretty much all agree that we don't expect a climax every time and that the act can be enjoyable without climaxing. Before I met my husband, I almost never came from penetration alone. With Hubby, it is most of the time but not all the time. I have off nights, and on those nights, unless something is physically wrong, I still very much enjoy sex with him. It's the togetherness in part, but also arousal itself can be quite fun, even without an orgasm.

So, if she's enjoying sex with you and continues to want sex with you, you're probably good.

Yeah. My husband used to think if he didn’t bring me to orgasm he’d “failed” as a lover. I’ve finally convinced him that I don’t care that much about cumming. Being touched the right way feels really good. Having him inside me is also really nice. Both experiences are worth having even if they don’t end in orgasm. I think sometime women fake orgasms just to put an end to the overstimulation: “See! I came! Can we stop now?”

 

[HighPlainsDrifter]

Yeah. My husband used to think if he didn’t bring me to orgasm he’d “failed” as a lover. I’ve finally convinced him that I don’t care that much about cumming. Being touched the right way feels really good. Having him inside me is also really nice. Both experiences are worth having even if they don’t end in orgasm. I think sometime women fake orgasms just to put an end to the overstimulation: “See! I came! Can we stop now?”

Thanks for this insight. Wife has often said she doesn’t always need an orgasm. She enjoys the intimacy. Shes not into oral (sadly) but loves being fingered, teased and usually only comes from penetration.
In contrast, before marriage I was seeing a girl who had a bf back home. She would do everything BUT penetration. She was fond of long and wild sessions of oral sex. But always required that at least one of us was wearing undies to avoid accidental penetration. I can still vividly recall some of her convulsive orgasms.

 

[pinkhighlighter]

I can orgasm just from my man playing with my tits. I’m also a squirter but that requires penetration. I actually orgasm very easily.

The first orgasm I was 16, my boyfriend at the time was 19.

 

[stormyrosey]

I used to have a hard time orgasming but after a 20 year relationship and my over 40 hormones I'm discovering I'm a squirter and I get turned on to the point of explosion when I have a vibe in each hole and one on my clit in solo play but I need to have a man or woman in chat jerking with me . Couple sex so far ass up face down can occasion make me cum my Last girlfriend was only clit to cum another needed nipples pinched while getting vibe on clit. All ladies are different

 

[WildFireTN]

I can orgasm just from my man playing with my tits. I’m also a squirter but that requires penetration. I actually orgasm very easily.

The first orgasm I was 16, my boyfriend at the time was 19.

Like my Wifey! She can cum hard from tits and nipple play, and I love it!
She learned to cum when she was young and self satisfied often. Made her very responsive for me over 45 years!
Still going strong!

 

[Bigboobbabe]

Thanks for sharing! What type of pain can make you orgasm?

If I am already aroused, a spanking can give me mini orgasms.

If I am on the edge, smacking my clit once will make me cum.
Repeatedly, rapid succession, makes me cum and squirt.

 

[Islander55]

Two things. First, y'all need to realize that everyone is different, and some of the signs guys seem to think come () with orgasms may not be there in some women and may not be there with some women sometimes but will be others. That's because women are different from each other and have different responses, and orgasms are also may be different from each other and have different effects. For me, sometimes I'm very loud when I orgasm and sometimes I'm very quiet. Sometimes I have body shaking orgasms and sometimes my body tenses and I don't move at all during climax. Sometimes, even my Hubby, who knows my body extremely well, isn't sure when I've come because it will be one of the little ones where I don't make noise or move or anything like that. So... the more you know.

Second, clitoral stimulation is the sure fire winner for me, except when it's not. Sometimes it's too much. Conversely, sometimes it's not enough if delivered by another person who doesn't know what he's doing (never been a problem with Hubby, though, or any woman I've been with).

Penetration works for me most of the time with Hubby (but irregularly before him), but it depends on a variety of factors, not all of which are physical. And anal penetration alone works a bit more than half the time, even though some people say it's impossible.

On the other hand, nipple play, spanking, giving a BJ, being face fucked when I'm really in the mood for it, etc. do not make me cAome. I'm kinda envious of women who say these work for them. For me, they just make me extremely ready, to the point I may explode the moment I'm penetrated or if my clit is touched.

An excellent post. Everyone is a bit different and reacts in different ways at different times.

 

[Islander55]

Yeah. My husband used to think if he didn’t bring me to orgasm he’d “failed” as a lover. I’ve finally convinced him that I don’t care that much about cumming. Being touched the right way feels really good. Having him inside me is also really nice. Both experiences are worth having even if they don’t end in orgasm. I think sometime women fake orgasms just to put an end to the overstimulation: “See! I came! Can we stop now?”

Sometimes it is tough to get a man to understand that good sex does not always include an orgasm for a woman. I do orgasm often but there are times I am content to just enjoy my partner and let him enjoy me.

 

[Purple_Fronds]

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond, it's very helpful! No, VERY rarely will she let me lick her to more than one (I always try!) because she says she's too sensitive and instead wants to move to penetration or giving me a blowjob. i consider myself very lucky, in that i feel our sex life is good, especially with the many posts i've read of partners who have zero interest in sex, ever. While i'm a little envious of those couples where partners seem to come and come easily, i'm not complaining. i am definitely in a loving and fulfilling relationship, and for that i'm grateful!

As everybody else said it seems you and your GF are doing great and the everybody’s different rule always applies.

However just a suggestion from a guy that you might want to try. Set out at the beginning of the session that you’d like her and you to just focus on her enjoyment, and she’s not to be concerned about you at all, tell her you most likely won’t cum and that’s ok.

That will be hard for her as she’s just as driven as you to give you pleasure, so reassure her that this is what you want this time. As an aside in my experience some women have a hard time with the idea that you’re not going to cum, it’s just as much ego for women as it is for men.

Then take your time, have a dildo (that she’s used before and likes) to use in conjunction with your cock and make it your goal for her to continue feeling good and maybe she’ll achieve another orgasm maybe she won’t but either way hopefully she’ll feel amazing, satiated and you’ll both have more data.

In my limited experience for some women the second time takes longer, or the sensitivity stays, and for some women the refraction time is just longer and with a mixed break where you’re just being affectionate might have you on the right path.

Of course the trick is for her to not feel pressure that she has to cum a second time that will just as likely kill the mood as anything else.

For me personally there’s nothing hotter than a woman sharing her user manual on what is going to give her pleasure.

 

[Islander55]

As everybody else said it seems you and your GF are doing great and the everybody’s different rule always applies.

However just a suggestion from a guy that you might want to try. Set out at the beginning of the session that you’d like her and you to just focus on her enjoyment, and she’s not to be concerned about you at all, tell her you most likely won’t cum and that’s ok.

That will be hard for her as she’s just as driven as you to give you pleasure, so reassure her that this is what you want this time. As an aside in my experience some women have a hard time with the idea that you’re not going to cum, it’s just as much ego for women as it is for men.

Then take your time, have a dildo (that she’s used before and likes) to use in conjunction with your cock and make it your goal for her to continue feeling good and maybe she’ll achieve another orgasm maybe she won’t but either way hopefully she’ll feel amazing, satiated and you’ll both have more data.

In my limited experience for some women the second time takes longer, or the sensitivity stays, and for some women the refraction time is just longer and with a mixed break where you’re just being affectionate . might have you on the right path.

Of course the trick is for her to not feel pressure that she has to cum a second time that will just as likely kill the mood as anything else.

For me personally there’s nothing hotter than a woman sharing her user manual on what is going to give her pleasure.

Perhaps one of the advantages of getting older, I am no longer inhibited about letting my partner know what I want or do not want. It seems that the biggest mistake couples make is not sharing their desires. I would also suggest that people understand that someone may not want sex the same way every time. Especially long term married couples tend to get into a rut. Personally there are times I am into long slow romantic passion but there are other times that I just want to be taken and used. Not in a brutal way but I want to feel that he wants and needs me and I want him to take me and make me his. I am not sure this is common for a lot of women but I am pretty sure it is not that uncommon either.

 

[WildFireTN]

Sometimes it is tough to get a man to understand that good sex does not always include an orgasm for a woman. I do orgasm often but there are times I am content to just enjoy my partner and let him enjoy me.

Well said, Islander55!
Wifey has told me the same. As a younger man, I did not understand and wanted her to cum every we were together. She says there are times she just enjoys being with me even if she is cannot totally get there. I believed it was up to me to make her cum, but it is not that simple. Woman are complex, and wonderful! Amazing to be with and watch and hold and… you know! I do my best to make her cum, but there are times it just ain’t getting there, and it might not be my fault, and it is all good.

 

[SouthByWest]

but there are other times that I just want to be taken and used. Not in a brutal way but I want to feel that he wants and needs me and I want him to take me and make me his. I am not sure this is common for a lot of women but I am pretty sure it is not that uncommon either

I think it's very common. And I'll bet it's even better when your partner just knows what you want, maybe even before you do.