Nothing to see here, Justa bit of Florida sunshine with a chance of hurricane.

[charterguy05]

Oh so I have to be topless for you to feign interest in my bra monologues. I see how it is.



Thank you.

not feigned interest I was thinking fashion show with the bra or bras

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Throwing cats takes a skill set that take a long time to learn. Did you start with hamsters?
As for me I am fairly accurate with a cat.

Lol. Well to be honest, i throw like a girl. If i am threatening to throw something at you, you do not have to worry at all.

But damn it, maybe someday I will get there.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

not feigned interest I was thinking fashion show with the bra or bras

Oh yippie fashion show, fun. The question is, what will you wear?

 

[rbijon]

Lol. Well to be honest, i throw like a girl. If i am threatening to throw something at you, you do not have to worry at all.

But damn it, maybe someday I will get there.

Well practice makes perfect, we could have a cat throw any time you wish.
You bring the wine

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Well practice makes perfect, we could have a cat throw any time you wish.
You bring the wine

Oh I prefer playing with pussy over throwing it, but I will bring the wine (I like pussy better after wine anyway)

 

[sinfulpleasure67]

Already did, but smaller bottles.



Aw, thanks. How sweet of you. Do I have to address you as officer?

Sir will do...

 

[charterguy05]

Oh yippie fashion show, fun. The question is, what will you wear?

black silk boxers

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Sir will do...

Oh, I don't know. It is hard to insert a level of sarcasm about perceived control in just one syllable. Well my sarcasm game is strong, so I could work with that.

black silk boxers

Oh sounds fun, and quite comfortable.

 

[sinfulpleasure67]

Oh, I don't know. It is hard to insert a level of sarcasm about perceived control in just one syllable. Well my sarcasm game is strong, so I could work with that.

Your sarcasm game is very strong. Part of what makes you incredibly sexy! now...hands one the hood and spread em...

 

[rbijon]

Oh I prefer playing with pussy over throwing it, but I will bring the wine (I like pussy better after wine anyway)

Playing pussy is one of my pirate favorites. Especially with a bratty beauty.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Your sarcasm game is very strong. Part of what makes you incredibly sexy! now...hands one the hood and spread em...

Aww well thanks. And yes sir (um insert long drawn out pronunciation of sir, with eyeroll and sarcastic tone, while I comply) and this is reason number 27 I haven't made it to writing that story in what has now officially been a year here.

Playing pussy is one of my pirate favorites. Especially with a bratty beauty.

Well good. Though my experience with pirates is primarily software and movie pirating. It goes way back to when pirating was slaving and cloning hard drives of others people shit, which was later found to also contain ridiculous amounts of disturbing porn. And you often wondered if those kinky bastards attending your pirate parties had bodies buried in their back yards. Then to torrents and finally to the scraping we know today. I suspect it isn't that kind of pirate games though. But I make a pretty good bar wench as historic tips can attest.

 

[rbijon]

Well good. Though my experience with pirates is primarily software and movie pirating. It goes way back to when pirating was slaving and cloning hard drives of others people shit, which was later found to also contain ridiculous amounts of disturbing porn. And you often wondered if those kinky bastards attending your pirate parties had bodies buried in their back yards. Then to torrents and finally to the scraping we know today. I suspect it isn't that kind of pirate games though. But I make a pretty good bar wench as historic tips can attest.[/QUOTE]

I bethinks youd be a fine Wench and would do well on my pirate ship, you certainly do well in my pirate dreams.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

So I bought some cheap lingerie and finally got to try it on to decide what to keep and what to return. It is all ill fitting but so is everything on me, I've accepted that. Anyway, I thought we could all enjoy a good laugh of a screenshot of the model, and the outfit on me.

These are all laced around how I normally lace, (all the way tight on the bottom and as slack as possible on top) but I didn't tweak them. So the look could change a little, as the try on is just to see if it is worth trying to play around and tweak. All are plus sized to give the best possible chance of my tits fitting in them, but of course only one uses a plus size model, cause ya know lol.

Oh and yes I am wearing my boring mom panties, again just a try on.

So the first, yeah obviously this is working out swimmingly.



Oh plus sized model, this has got to be fairly representative, right



Or not.

Oh and this one, my tits are literally in the cup, below the cup, above the cup, and to the side of the cup and the same time, while I can't get it tight enough for my hips to hold it. Oh and it drops white feathers.



This one is heavy as hell and I like it. I think the least ill fitting of the group, though still ill fitting. But I think I could rest a full sized dinner plate on my tits. That is something



This could be worse I guess


So yeah that was lingerie shopping with Justa. Maybe next time I will go for the ultimate in the comedy horror show, swimsuit shopping. Oh who am I kidding it all looks pretty much like the second outfit above, just add a old chick floral swimskirt.

So which do i keep, and which do I return (all are between $4 and $8 so my keep standard is pretty low)

 

[RjThoughts]

So I bought some cheap lingerie and finally got to try it on to decide what to keep and what to return. It is all ill fitting but so is everything on me, I've accepted that. Anyway, I thought we could all enjoy a good laugh of a screenshot of the model, and the outfit on me.

These are all laced around how I normally lace, (all the way tight on the bottom and as slack as possible on top) but I didn't tweak them. So the look could change a little, as the try on is just to see if it is worth trying to play around and tweak. All are plus sized to give the best possible chance of my tits fitting in them, but of course only one uses a plus size model, cause ya know lol.

Oh and yes I am wearing my boring mom panties, again just a try on.

So the first, yeah obviously this is working out swimmingly.



Oh plus sized model, this has got to be fairly representative, right



Or not.

Oh and this one, my tits are literally in the cup, below the cup, above the cup, and to the side of the cup and the same time, while I can't get it tight enough for my hips to hold it. Oh and it drops white feathers.



This one is heavy as hell and I like it. I think the least ill fitting of the group, though still ill fitting. But I think I could rest a full sized dinner plate on my tits. That is something



This could be worse I guess


So yeah that was lingerie shopping with Justa. Maybe next time I will go for the ultimate in the comedy horror show, swimsuit shopping. Oh who am I kidding it all looks pretty much like the second outfit above, just add a old chick floral swimskirt.

So which do i keep, and which do I return (all are between $4 and $8 so my keep standard is pretty low)

I say, "Keep them all!"

They're cheaper than my own obsession: Books!

 

[rbijon]

So I bought some cheap lingerie and finally got to try it on to decide what to keep and what to return. It is all ill fitting but so is everything on me, I've accepted that. Anyway, I thought we could all enjoy a good laugh of a screenshot of the model, and the outfit on me.

These are all laced around how I normally lace, (all the way tight on the bottom and as slack as possible on top) but I didn't tweak them. So the look could change a little, as the try on is just to see if it is worth trying to play around and tweak. All are plus sized to give the best possible chance of my tits fitting in them, but of course only one uses a plus size model, cause ya know lol.

Oh and yes I am wearing my boring mom panties, again just a try on.

So the first, yeah obviously this is working out swimmingly.



Oh plus sized model, this has got to be fairly representative, right



Or not.

Oh and this one, my tits are literally in the cup, below the cup, above the cup, and to the side of the cup and the same time, while I can't get it tight enough for my hips to hold it. Oh and it drops white feathers.



This one is heavy as hell and I like it. I think the least ill fitting of the group, though still ill fitting. But I think I could rest a full sized dinner plate on my tits. That is something



This could be worse I guess


So yeah that was lingerie shopping with Justa. Maybe next time I will go for the ultimate in the comedy horror show, swimsuit shopping. Oh who am I kidding it all looks pretty much like the second outfit above, just add a old chick floral swimskirt.

So which do i keep, and which do I return (all are between $4 and $8 so my keep standard is pretty low)

Keep them all. That way I won't feel so bad as I rip them off of you just to kiss you very delicious skin, or I won't feel so bad when spill my wine all over you and have to kiss it off your body.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I bethinks youd be a fine Wench and would do well on my pirate ship, you certainly do well in my pirate dreams.

Well thank you. Pirate wench would be an awesome addition to my resume in the special skills section, right after able to suck my own nipples.

 

[rbijon]

Well thank you. Pirate wench would be an awesome addition to my resume in the special skills section, right after able to suck my own nipples.

Oh that was required to begin with
What other Pirate Wench skill do you have?
Knots?

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I say, "Keep them all!"

They're cheaper than my own obsession: Books!

Keep them all. That way I won't feel so bad as I rip them off of you just to kiss you very delicious skin, or I won't feel so bad when spill my wine all over you and have to kiss it off your body.

Oh now come on. 1 the top can't even stay up for a second, and 3 is an underside cup, underwire should never sit on ones nipple, for very valid reasons. They have to go back

2 I really don't know about either. I think those straps might snap, and do so with extreme force lol.

 

[ohverbatum7]

could be worse

Selling yourself short as usual. your photos bring me eagerly back for more.

 

[rbijon]

Oh now come on. 1 the top can't even stay up for a second, and 3 is an underside cup, underwire should never sit on ones nipple, for very valid reasons. They have to go back

2 I really don't know about either. I think those straps might snap, and do so with extreme force lol.

Ahrrrrrr, those straps might not hold up in a pirate wind. You might be shivering me timbers!

 

[ohverbatum7]

post shower

Captivating shot!

 

[wickedpanda]

I love the fashion show and the outfit fails while just lusting for your sexy busty body!

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Oh that was required to begin with
What other Pirate Wench skill do you have?
Knots?

Well I can tie a Windsor and half Windsor knot from tying ex's ties.

I can tie a slip knot, and a damn good noose. My first apartment was decorated with Escher and Dali work taken from books and taped to the walls, and barbies hanging from nooses, oh and being eaten by dragons and such. And miscellaneous Halloween decor. I bet if I tried I could still do a large amount of braids, weaving techniques, and friendship bracelet knots from my time working as a summer camp councillor, though I don't recall the name of any.

 

[Shyguy1369]

Well since it is fuck it friday, work, fuck it

Damn... Your breasts can make me so aroused all on their own. But knowing they are attached to such a beautiful, sexy and desirable woman... I repeat... DAMN!!!

So I bought some cheap lingerie and finally got to try it on to decide what to keep and what to return. It is all ill fitting but so is everything on me, I've accepted that. Anyway, I thought we could all enjoy a good laugh of a screenshot of the model, and the outfit on me.

These are all laced around how I normally lace, (all the way tight on the bottom and as slack as possible on top) but I didn't tweak them. So the look could change a little, as the try on is just to see if it is worth trying to play around and tweak. All are plus sized to give the best possible chance of my tits fitting in them, but of course only one uses a plus size model, cause ya know lol.

Oh and yes I am wearing my boring mom panties, again just a try on.

So the first, yeah obviously this is working out swimmingly.



Oh plus sized model, this has got to be fairly representative, right



Or not.

Oh and this one, my tits are literally in the cup, below the cup, above the cup, and to the side of the cup and the same time, while I can't get it tight enough for my hips to hold it. Oh and it drops white feathers.



This one is heavy as hell and I like it. I think the least ill fitting of the group, though still ill fitting. But I think I could rest a full sized dinner plate on my tits. That is something



This could be worse I guess


So yeah that was lingerie shopping with Justa. Maybe next time I will go for the ultimate in the comedy horror show, swimsuit shopping. Oh who am I kidding it all looks pretty much like the second outfit above, just add a old chick floral swimskirt.

So which do i keep, and which do I return (all are between $4 and $8 so my keep standard is pretty low)

So I love them all... BUT, that being said... I think you should keep the Christmas one, I think it's erotic and sexy as hell; and the 4th one seems to me to be a keeper as well. I might consider the 1st one... but only if you want your breasts all out there... I certainly don't mind, but you might

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

could be worse

Selling yourself short as usual. your photos bring me eagerly back for more.

Oh, so we like cheap poorly fitting clothes. Yeah I am totally your girl.

Ahrrrrrr, those straps might not hold up in a pirate wind. You might be shivering me timbers!

Hopefully they don't take out someone's eye in the process.

post shower

Captivating shot!

Thank you.

I love the fashion show and the outfit fails while just lusting for your sexy busty body!

Well thanks. I can assure you my tits will pop out of each one of those the moment I bend over. And I am clumsy so I drop shit a lot.