Since most of my friends are on this forum...

[BeachMomma]

Thanks sweetie. I'm glad to be back. These first few days seem to be all about learning my limits. And respecting them. (That's the problem. Lol). Hopefully I'll regain more strength and energy every day.

If I *want* to take a daytime nap, that's one thing. This bullshit of *needing* to lay down after a simple Starbucks run? Fuck that shit.

 

[TomBoner]

Thanks sweetie. I'm glad to be back. These first few days seem to be all about learning my limits. And respecting them. (That's the problem. Lol). Hopefully I'll regain more strength and energy every day.

If I *want* to take a daytime nap, that's one thing. This bullshit of *needing* to lay down after a simple Starbucks run? Fuck that shit.

10 years ago I fell 25 feet off a ladder while I was cutting a tree limb and fractured on of my vetebra's. It was painful, painful ... although believe it or not I managed to talk my wife into letting me change clothes before we went to the hospital. Anyway, I was pretty much doped up for a couple weeks straight before it finally started healing to where they could wean me off. Not one of my most favorite ways to go through life.

Anyway, it just takes time to heal ... but then I'm talking to an expert about such things.

Hang in there ...

 

[BeachMomma]

10 years ago I fell 25 feet off a ladder while I was cutting a tree limb and fractured on of my vetebra's. It was painful, painful ... although believe it or not I managed to talk my wife into letting me change clothes before we went to the hospital. Anyway, I was pretty much doped up for a couple weeks straight before it finally started healing to where they could wean me off. Not one of my most favorite ways to go through life.

Anyway, it just takes time to heal ... but then I'm talking to an expert about such things.

Hang in there ...

Good Lord. You are such a man!

Expert? It's a documented fact that nurses and doctors are the least compliant, worst patients. I have a reputation to maintain, and I'm certainly doing my part in maintaining it. lol

I gave it time. It's had 24 hours. Now it's time to straighten up and quit acting like such a pussy! hmpf!

 

[TomBoner]

Good Lord. You are such a man!

Expert? It's a documented fact that nurses and doctors are the least compliant, worst patients. I have a reputation to maintain, and I'm certainly doing my part in maintaining it. lol

I gave it time. It's had 24 hours. Now it's time to straighten up and quit acting like such a pussy! hmpf!

But I like your pussy.

...

Oh ... ... never mind. That's not how you meant it.



I dated a nurse for a couple of months between marriages. If she's any example, you guys are whacko in bed.

 

[BeachMomma]

I dated a nurse for a couple of months between marriages. If she's any example, you guys are whacko in bed.

That's what I've heard. hehehe

Besides being a nurse, I'm also a redheaded Scorpio. The trifecta.

 

[Emerson40]

That's what I've heard. hehehe

Besides being a nurse, I'm also a redheaded Scorpio. The trifecta.

In this case, from the Latin, Trytoavoidicus If Can't Handleus.

 

[perkyT]

Thanks sweetie. I'm glad to be back. These first few days seem to be all about learning my limits. And respecting them. (That's the problem. Lol). Hopefully I'll regain more strength and energy every day.

If I *want* to take a daytime nap, that's one thing. This bullshit of *needing* to lay down after a simple Starbucks run? Fuck that shit.

Discharge Instructions for BeachyBabyB

You may drive to Starbucks.
You may feel like taking it easy after said trip to Starbucks.
You may not over do it just cause you're feeling okay & tired of feeling like a wuss...because that is what will send your sweet ass back to the unit.

Signed,

PerkyPartyPooper, RN

 

[BeachMomma]

In this case, from the Latin, Trytoavoidicus If Can't Handleus.

Key word = try?

Discharge Instructions for BeachyBabyB

You may drive to Starbucks.
You may feel like taking it easy after said trip to Starbucks.
You may not over do it just cause you're feeling okay & tired of feeling like a wuss...because that is what will send your sweet ass back to the unit.

Signed,

PerkyPartyPooper, RN

Nurses Note:

11/6/13 2112
S: Pt C/O frustration and states she's "stir crazy." No C/O pain or N/V.
O: Pt verbalizing A/V hallucinations and intermittent HI. HI - Patient refuses to elaborate. Mutters "then they throw around dirty words like 'premeditated.'"
A: Pt doesn't suffer from crazy; she enjoys it.
P: Attempt to prevent BA; keep pt entertained. Will direct to Lit forums; continue to monitor.

The A/V hallucinations - the last day I was in the hospital, my IV pump talked to another IV pump down the hall for several minutes. It was so amusing that I didn't have the heart to hit the silence button or call the RN.

 

[Emerson40]

11/6/13 2112
S: Pt C/O frustration and states she's "stir crazy." No C/O pain or N/V.
O: Pt verbalizing A/V hallucinations and intermittent HI. HI - Patient refuses to elaborate. Mutters "then they throw around dirty words like 'premeditated.'"
A: Pt doesn't suffer from crazy; she enjoys it.
P: Attempt to prevent BA; keep pt entertained. Will direct to Lit forums; continue to monitor.

I hear similar words were overheard, muttered by neighbors, while tidying up empty Solo cups and discarded cake-flavored voddie bottles from garden area surrounding the hot tub.

The A/V hallucinations - the last day I was in the hospital, my IV pump talked to another IV pump down the hall for several minutes. It was so amusing that I didn't have the heart to hit the silence button or call the RN.

Totally sounds like it was time to go home. Another day more, the pumps would've been talking to you.

 

[BeachMomma]

But was it really the morphine talking?

Right! Then we'd have to include paranoia in the Assessment.

 

[Emerson40]

But was it really the morphine talking?

Right! Then we'd have to include paranoia in the Assessment.

You were among peers and colleagues. They had a pretty good idea there was a possible tempest in red curls rolling in on that gurney.

There was probably a great deal that could have been included in the Assessment, but would never be written, for they feared (rightfully so) the BeachLady's wrath.

 

[TomBoner]

The A/V hallucinations - the last day I was in the hospital, my IV pump talked to another IV pump down the hall for several minutes. It was so amusing that I didn't have the heart to hit the silence button or call the RN.

Mannnnnnn ... ... now you've done gone and made me jealous! All I ever had was fish in an aquarium talking to each other.

Morning BM!

...



...

Ooooopppssss. That doesn't sound so good, now does it. OK ... let's try it again.

Morning beachers!

 

[BeachMomma]

You were among peers and colleagues. They had a pretty good idea there was a possible tempest in red curls rolling in on that gurney.

There was probably a great deal that could have been included in the Assessment, but would never be written, for they feared (rightfully so) the BeachLady's wrath.

Wrath? Nooooo! Any smart nurse knows that the *last* person a patient wants to piss off is her RN. And I'm smarter than the average bear. They had me riiiight where they wanted me. At their mercy. It's not considered good form to have to apologize for bad behavior when begging for pain meds.

Mannnnnnn ... ... now you've done gone and made me jealous! All I ever had was fish in an aquarium talking to each other.

Morning BM!

...



...

Ooooopppssss. That doesn't sound so good, now does it. OK ... let's try it again.

Morning beachers!

Maybe that's because you were only using amateur bartenders. Yanno the ones I mean. Those who mix libations on Friday nights at the bar. *My* bartenders were among the best. They don't waste time expecting you to drink and metabolize their libations; they put it directly into your bloodstream. And you should see that cool trick they do when they push the olive through the IV tubing.

A little factoid of trivia. My real life initials are also BM. lol. Yeah I know. Trust me. I've already heard every possible joke.

Good morning sugar!

 

[TomBoner]

Here ya go beachers ... this made me think of you.

 

[BeachMomma]

Here ya go beachers ... this made me think of you.

Every crowd has to have a smart ass. I understand that. Ya have to be a smart ass to survive in THIS crowd.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

That's awesome Tom! And far too close to troof these days!

 

[BeachMomma]

And oh dear lord. Somehow this thread made it to 57 pages of tomfoolery. I love you guys!

 

[TomBoner]

And oh dear lord. Somehow this thread made it to 57 pages of tomfoolery. I love you guys!

Ya know ... you coulda called it tombonery! I think that has kinda a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

Good morning hot mama!

 

[BeachMomma]

Haha! Cute! Lets see. We've had male nurse porn, whale foreskin, and bat... The bat definitely had a boner! Yeah I'd say there's been some tombonery on these pages. Hehehe

Good morning sweetie!

 

[BeachMomma]

Hi hon! I'm getting a little better every day! How are you?

 

[Emerson40]

And oh dear lord. Somehow this thread made it to 57 pages of tomfoolery. I love you guys!

57? Seems like only yesterday this thing was 17.


What the hell we been talkin' about?

 

[BeachMomma]

Ya mean besides hunky male nurses, whale foreskin, and bat peni? What else is there?

 

[perkyT]

Ya mean besides hunky male nurses, whale foreskin, and bat peni? What else is there?

ummm...

food porn.

 

[BeachMomma]

That's at Brad's place. Ya go south on I-75 and get off at the second exit.

 

[TomBoner]

Ya mean besides hunky male nurses, whale foreskin, and bat peni? What else is there?

Uhhhhhhhh ... how cum you skipped racoons peni? Much more impressive topic.

ummm...

food porn.

Does it sound more erotic to refer to it as munchie porn?

 

[BeachMomma]

Uhhhhhhhh ... how cum you skipped racoons peni? Much more impressive topic.

Does it sound more erotic to refer to it as munchie porn?

Oh no. This bat penis was quite impressive. It's probably around page 9 or so. It's one for the ya gotta see it to believe it file.

Mr coon is definitely proud of his junk too. With good reason. I'm sure the lady coons flock to him.