some random poem of mine

[zell19861986]

Work

Work work work
Gotta make a living

Love freedom joy
Out the window they go

Happy young people enter
Old lumps of bitterness leave

Life blurs on
Nothing distinguishing moment from moment

Work work work
Gotta make a living

Get back to work!

 

[zell19861986]

Innocence

Her innocence was taken today
Her screams of pain were heard into the night
Her tears were of shattered dreams
She feels broken

She isn't herself anymore
She shies away from everyone
She feels ashamed
She thinks its her fault

She cries herself to sleep now
All she can think is suicide
She hates herself
She doesn't want any one to get close

She isn't herself anymore
She shies away from everyone
She feels ashamed
She thinks its her fault

She runs from everything now
Nothing she does makes anything she does better
Her life feels like a non-stop hell
She hates to cry

She isn't herself anymore
She shies away from everyone
She feels ashamed
She thinks its her fault

She stopped talking
She just wants to dissappear
Nothing matters anymore
Why did that have to happen to her?

She isn't herself anymore
She shies away from everyone
She feels ashamed
She thinks its her fault

The man that did that to her doesn't care
He just wanted to get off
Nothing made him feel better then doing that
He's fucking scum

She isn't herself anymore
She shies away from everyone
She feels ashamed
She thinks its her fault

She acquires a knife
No one knows anything
She quickly ends everything
No one expected anything

 

[zell19861986]

Smoke

The smoke rising
The clattering of a gun
The thud of a child falling
Never to get up again
The falling of running feet
The open gun cabnet
Inciting to two small children
The stupidity of the father
The grief of a mother
The kid mentally scarred for life
Another kid never to laugh again

 

[zell19861986]

i have a question about this poem

Daughter

Another day comes and goes
Your face so sweet
Always smiling at me
You entered my life
With a scream and a cry
You've been there for me
And I for you
Nothing can stop me
From ever loving you
Oh daughter of mine

which sounds better oh daughter of mine or sweet daughter of mine?

 

[Liar]

Re: i have a question about this poem

Daughter

Another day comes and goes
Your face so sweet
Always smiling at me
You entered my life
With a scream and a cry
You've been there for me
And I for you
Nothing can stop me
From ever loving you
Oh daughter of mine

which sounds better oh daughter of mine or sweet daughter of mine?

I'd frefer just 'daughter of mine'. It's such a strong statement as it is. If you feel you absolutely need to, go ahead and add the 'oh'.

#L