Someone doesn't know their Poetry..

[jthserra]

Ezra Pound

I've just recalled there is a 'famous' haiku Pound wrote, does anyone know it? I can see in my mind the image it evoked but cannot recall the words. I think he was looking at a crowded scene, maybe in a train terminal?

Perdita

The apparition of these faces in the crowd;
Petals on a wet, black bough.
(Ezra Pound)

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[jthserra]

Re: Re: Exactly!!!

My argument would continue, then, that what I am searching for would be something which is pornographic, but also erotic. Possible, or not?

I think this is the argument that has been echoed in the halls of the supreme court and courts all over the country. Where do you draw the line between pornographic and erotic? The boundaries blur in some cases. What is art and what is not?

I find subtlety erotic... a midlength skirt with a slit is extremely erotic for me. Now a naked woman sitting provacatively will turn me on, but that slit in the skirt will grab my attention.

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[jthserra]

Re: Re: Mckenna... I'll give it a try

Oy. So I hate to seem like I'm overly critical... but it only leaves me lukewarm. I'm looking for something that leaves me hot. Yes, that kind of erotic. Which is not the same as pornographic, but doesn't mean it couldn't or wouldn't contain pornographic elements.

Here I am trying to give you something erotic from my eyes. The idea here is to compress...

think about what you find erotic in how the man shifts the gears. Reduce that into a single element that does it... the way he glances at you when he shifts, the way he holds his lip, the way his fingers move. Find that single element... if you can do that, then you concentrate your attention to the single element and present that image. This is the essense of haiku, to see the extraordinary in the ordinary...

 

[jthserra]

and Perdita

I'm still working on that shivering wasabi haiku...

jim

 

[Guest]

Thanks, Jim. For the Pound too.

Perdita

 

[Guest]

Re. Jim's shifting images. When last I had a car I often thought of the well knobbed stick as a cock. Really. Made for great rides.

Perdita

 

[dr_mabeuse]

I really don’t think you’re going to find any really hot and juicy haiku. The form just can’t stand the weight of all that hot and heaving flesh. No spurting cocks, no throbbing pussies. Haiku just aren’t built for that. Again, the image of barbecue sauce on sushi comes to mind.

Haiku is much more suited to the covert glance, the subtle touch. The emotions of porn are just too much for it. They crush it all out of shape.

On the other hand, I seem to remember that there was a Japanese poetry form that was used for bedroom subjects, but I might be wrong.

---dr.M.

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[Guest]

Tried 'erotic haiku' on google. Found this (url offers 5 bucks for erotic haiku). Not erotic per Mack's desires, nor mine, but not bad.

Perdita
------

by Hiroaki Sato:

In your panties
slightly pulled down
a crisp fallen leaf

That first time
my middle-finger slipped into
your warm wet cleft

e-haiku

 

[McKenna]

.

 

[jthserra]

Perdita... I don't

have that haiku on the wasabi, but here is something to tide you over. It's a little longer than haiku, but there is some hot wasabi in it:


The Sensuous Art of Sushi


and watch for the soon to be released story entry of nearly the same title...



jim

 

[Guest]

Jim, that was almost enticing, but I must be honest and say that I just don't get sushi, but for a couple items. Still, I do appreciate wasabi.

Perdita

 

[The_Fool]

"Dammit....Poetry is only what I say it is."


That is a direct quote from someone...I think...maybe not.

*heavy sigh* Okay back to lurking.

As for the too short, they should step through Challenge: The Perfect Ten . I have seen some pretty thought provoking stuff there. The challenge? write the perfect poem in ten words or less.

Lurking Fool

 

[Icingsugar]

As for the too short, they should step through Challenge: The Perfect Ten . I have seen some pretty thought provoking stuff there. The challenge? write the perfect poem in ten words or less.

In which I found this by mr Jim Haiku here

bright orange
I trace a fallen leaf
on your breast

Not lava-hot maybe, but worked for me.

(just for the record: this was never claimed by jthserra to be haiku, btw. I think it might be, syllable count aside, but what do I know?)

 

[jthserra]

LOL... My past...

comes back to me here...

Yes, while I didn't call that a haiku on that thread, it was originally written as a haiku for a contest with a prompt of "Autumn Color". I wrote it based upon a 3/5/3 English syllable count.

Most haiku I write now, I try to work something shorter than 17 syllables. The reason I do this is an attempt to write in a length closer to the original Japanese haiku. Classical Japanese haiku is generally based upon a form of 5/7/5 Onji. Onji is the Japanese equivalent of the english syllable, however an onji is basically shorter than a normal english syllable. In other words, a word length that is one syllable in english, say lake, would normally be made up of two or three onji.

In order to approximate the length of Japanese haiku, we need to reduce the length of English haiku to something less than 17 syllables. In order to do this I usually work towards a 3/5/3 English syllable count.

I will be posting an article in the "How To" section titled "Not Seventeen" that will discuss haiku form as it relates to the syllable count.

jim

 

[sweetnpetite]

Hot and Juicy

Golden peaches in the sun
Piercing fuzzy skin
I savor dripping nector


For those who prefer something more obvious:

Slutty little tricked out whore
Begging for your cock
She needs it more than you do

OR

Incest Haiku

Slutty little tricked out whore
Begging for your cock
Too bad she's your favorite aunt

(substitute according to your fetish:

Too bad she's your next of kin (grown daughter)

Too bad she's your mothers child (sister)

or to really throw the whole thing for a loop:

Too bad 'she's' your mother's son



For those who are into orgasm denial:

To bad she's a fantasy

 

[sweetnpetite]

Nature can be quite erotic. throw me on a beach with the sun setting and the gulls calling and a stiff ocean breeze with the right person (can't help but think of one person at this point in time) and it wouldn't even take a glass of wine for me to be "in the mood".

Rowr! for nature!

-Coly

Two on a Towel

gulls cry circ'ling sunset sky
waves crash, stiff wind blows
you whisper and I'm ready



.

 

[sweetnpetite]

Sweet, you asked Colly but I want to say that is quite lovely and erotic. Good for you. If you post it don't put haiku in the title .

cheers, Perdita

p.s. lily, trickling, Moist (as the other lines begin w/caps)

Haiku Comparing Female Human Sexual Response to a Trembling Calla Lilly Wet With Dew

Are you sure 'dita? I think that would make a great title

 

[Guest]

Haiku Comparing Female Human Sexual Response to a Trembling Calla Lilly Wet With Dew

I love it, do as you will (that's you!)

Perdita

 

[sweetnpetite]

My spelling is awful. I will however admit Haiku can be erotic

Didn't know you were a poet SnP

-Colly

I didn't either!!!

Form is a beautiful thing

 

[sweetnpetite]

I love it, do as you will (that's you!)

Perdita

Oh my!

I was just kidding Guess I should have used a winky face

 

[sweetnpetite]

Re: Re: Mckenna... I'll give it a try

Oy. So I hate to seem like I'm overly critical... but it only leaves me lukewarm. I'm looking for something that leaves me hot. Yes, that kind of erotic. Which is not the same as pornographic, but doesn't mean it couldn't or wouldn't contain pornographic elements.

I think you should give it a try, based on your own observation of details. what is it about a man shifting gears that you find so erotic? Is it a certain muscle tensing, an agressive vibe that you sense, or the phallic nature of the gear shift (either homo-erotic or auto-erotic- how's that for a pun??)

Haiku is about observation- as someone said, so if you put your mind too it and note what you feel is erotic about it *too you* then I think you'll have a winner.

(and if you do decide to use a title, might I suggest 'Auto-Erotic')

 

[sweetnpetite]

I really don’t think you’re going to find any really hot and juicy haiku. The form just can’t stand the weight of all that hot and heaving flesh. No spurting cocks, no throbbing pussies. Haiku just aren’t built for that. Again, the image of barbecue sauce on sushi comes to mind.



---dr.M.

how about these, Dr. M? you can't deny that the first one is 'hot and juicy'

Hot and Juicy

Golden peaches in the sun
Piercing fuzzy skin
I savor dripping nector


Cheap and Nasty

Slutty little tricked out whore
Begging for your cock
She needs it more than you do