~~Something to know !~~

[lil_slave_rose]

As a horsewoman and a sometimes-dominant, that is a faulty metaphor at best and total bullshit at worst.

*grins* glad i'm not the only one who thought this

 

[lil_slave_rose]

Past is the Raw data that you feed into ur machine of Present and the output is future.
The final product depends on the input. I am not 'holding' it hard .. but ur past walks with you where ever you go .. if its gud one .. u get promotions
If its bad .. it keeps walking with you ....

Yes I am not holding it ... I am ready for reformation .. and I am working on it ....
I am here looking for "help" ...

~R~

look, i've had a not so good past myself. for the first 3 years of my life i was beaten, molested, locked in closets, etc...then i was put into the foster care system where i stayed until my foster family adopted me. after that i was molested again by my adopted mothers step father (my grandpa) until i was about 10 years old. at 11 i found out my adoptive mom was sick with cancer, i started rebelling BIG TIME, and 2 weeks before my 15th birthday my mom died. i then rebelled even more and became pregnant with my first child. i had her when i was 16 years old. i took responsibility for my actions and got married. i was married for 10 years and went through TONS of abuse both physical and emotional almost every single day of those 10 years.

my point is, no you cannot get rid of your past, but you can take what happened and LEARN from it and move on, doing things differently and in doing that, you make YOUR OWN life better. you should learn from your past not hold onto it and blame it for everything that goes wrong in your life. i am not saying my life is perfect, it's not by far but if i were to dwell on all the bad things that happened in my life, good god i dont think i'd like the person i was very much let alone be able to find someone else to love me. own up to the mistakes you've made in your life and quit blaming others (what others did you in the past ect...) only YOU can change things, it doesn't take a Dom to do it for you....

 

[MasterPhoenix]

As a Dominant, I have to reply to this and say that I don't believe that having a Dominant will help. Frankly, as a Dominant I don't want a submissive that I have to completely reprogram. When I met rose we formed a deep bond on a personal level, and then I led her into this lifestyle as the way that we relate to one and other. Yeah, I have to guide her and sometimes discipline her, but it all comes from a sacred bond of love and trust that she and I share.

If she were into drugs, or regularly drank too much, that would cause big problems in our relationship, because the chemicals would be the ones dominating her, not me.

If you want to become submissive to another, it has to be about a desire to not only surrender control, but to also serve. It is something that goes far beyond the bedroom, and into every aspect of our lives. No Dominant can save you from yourself, you have to do that before you can offer submission.

As others have said, counseling would be your best option, in MY opinion.

 

[Etoile]

Why do we have so many threads lately on people who want BDSM to fix all their problems?

As for the reason why I don't believe the OP, well, consider it a compliment that I can't imagine anybody could possibly be this absurd.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Does the opening poster remind anyone else of doll_parts85?

 

[Rusty_Rider]

What must I say ?

I exactly dont know how to respond to the responses made by you fine people!

First of all I wonder why u all keep telling me that "I am responsible for my past" wen I have already told you all that it is not what I am denying! I took the responsibility of my past and I do take it. Did i deny that somewhere? Where does this keeps coming up from?

Miss cutiemouse .. reffering to what u said

Originally Posted by CutieMouse
You do not need a Dom; you need a good therapist.

What you are proposing, isn't nearly as "simple" as you make it sound. You are asking a Dom to reprogramme you to function well in society; this is not a Dominant's job; this is not something that can be done through some sort of Online-Dom-Accountability-Programme.

In order for such a proposal to work, you would have to

A) .............

B) .............

C) .............

IMO, you would be better served to contact your county MHMR deptarment (Mental Health/Mental Retardation) for therapy on a sliding scale fee, suck up (grow up), and do the freaking work yourself, for yourself.

In the first place I didnt 'proposed' anything. I put up a question and then another question accompanying that! I asked "Is that possible?" .. If yes .. then .."Is there anyone like that" .....

But most of people here are taking it as a proposal of a kind "I want that exactly the way i want" thing ....
I think u need to understand before you make notes of what someone said!

Miss lil_slave_rose:
As I said in my previous posts on this thread .. life gives u two options .. either take on all the beatings you can take ... and second .. to revolt against it! If you took all the abusings all ur life .. no one isnt givin u a medal for that .. I took the latter path and went to jail .. no one aint givin me a medal for that ! So there's nothin' to talk about it !


Miss BiBunny:

Some ten years back .. a bully called me the poor boy ...

Oh, Cutie, do stop it. You're ruining the poor boy's little fantasy............

Three years later he was begging at my feet ... ofcourse he did died after that ...

Its so easy to make fun of anyone .. but that aint working wen u got to do it on their faces !!

Evil_Geoff and MasterPhoenix:
Thanx for the most sensible advices on this thread. (Evil_geoff .. thanx for ur reply on the other thread as well .. )

Etoile:
I dont know how many threads you hit with the same content .. but obviously u are not here to help .. ! right?
Yeah .. its fun to stand with buddies and laugh at the "poor guy" .. aint it?

FurryFury:

About what you said "Yes, I was talking about your future.

What you did in the past, no matter how terrible is the past.

The future is wide open unless you, yourself close it.

It's all about choices and learning to live with the ones you made, the ones you are making and the ones you will make."

Sincere Thanx .. I know u are absolutely right ... thanx for reminding me that again !!

Apologies .. if that hurts anyone .. I am trying to reform ..
but if hurts .. do not mind .. I had been a BAD GUY !!

Thanx everyone for their serious responses .. U all are appriciated !!

~R~

 

[CutieMouse]

Miss cutiemouse .. reffering to what u said

In the first place I didnt 'proposed' anything. I put up a question and then another question accompanying that! I asked "Is that possible?" .. If yes .. then .."Is there anyone like that" .....

But most of people here are taking it as a proposal of a kind "I want that exactly the way i want" thing ....
I think u need to understand before you make notes of what someone said!

You didn't propose anything? From your original post:

This has put me to serious thinking. Is it possible that a dominant can also improve a real bad man by teaching him some manners or by teaching him to keep his temper under control? Is it possible that by regular and continuous training can a man be trained to live a sensible life by quitting drugs and other bad habits?Okay... I know the answer to the question... but would like to hear from u guys …
Adding another question … is there any Dom that would like to take up a job of this kind?
Extending this query to a personal I would add that I need a Dom for such a purpose...

Idea/proposal... sigh. You came here asking a question from people who have experience with BDSM. You are getting responses that say it's not very likely, and you need to fix yourself. When people tell you that, you argue that we don't understand, you had this horrible childhood, and you need someone else to make you make the right decisions. While people take the time to suggest alternatives, you continue to focus on the idea that BDSM will fix you.

BTW - your comments to Bunny could easily be seen as a personal threat; I suggest you refrain from doing that again.

 

[Etoile]

I still find the whole thing bogus. YMMV.

 

[Rusty_Rider]

You didn't propose anything? From your original post:



Idea/proposal... sigh. You came here asking a question from people who have experience with BDSM. You are getting responses that say it's not very likely, and you need to fix yourself. When people tell you that, you argue that we don't understand, you had this horrible childhood, and you need someone else to make you make the right decisions. While people take the time to suggest alternatives, you continue to focus on the idea that BDSM will fix you.

BTW - your comments to Bunny could easily be seen as a personal threat; I suggest you refrain from doing that again.

Am glad that u understood that I came here asking a question.
I am getting responses 'on this thread' that are not very likely .. everyone has a different view point .. and neither I expect to find what Ia m looking for in one go .. some of them were absurd to the extent they could be .. but it always happen! I do have paitence !
Childhood is gone .. and I am not a guy suffering from the trauma of childhood .. Its gone .. it was a long story .. everyone got back what they deserved .. so I am not here to whine about my childhood ..
Nor am I focusing on BDSM to fix me ... I asked .. is that possible?
Okay that was proposing an idea .. but I didnt came here posting "I am looking for so and so .. " Did I ?
and the question "is there any dom ..." had something preceding to it .. if that is to be considered ...

BTW: Apologies for those comments .. if they sound like a threat .. I really dont like that kind of attitude ... if people take care about it in future ... I will do take care about it in future !

~R~

 

[Rusty_Rider]

I still find the whole thing bogus. YMMV.

ofcourse .. but for no reason !!!

~R~

 

[Etoile]

ofcourse .. but for no reason !!!

~R~

Well, perhaps I am wrong. Maybe English is not your native language and you have difficulty expressing yourself in English, and it comes across to me as trolling. Or perhaps, I can't believe anybody would be this stubborn and insistent in the face of many people telling them the same thing. Or perhaps I just think you're smart enough to know the answer to this question already. Take your pick.

 

[Rusty_Rider]

Or perhaps, I can't believe anybody would be this stubborn and insistent in the face of many people telling them the same thing. Or perhaps I just think you're smart enough to know the answer to this question already. Take your pick.

I am stubborn enough to keep believing in what I say unless I come across something that is reasonably contradictory. I don’t accept what people tell me to do. Some don’t like it. But I can’t follow them just because they said so.

"in face of many people..."

.......

Yes, in face of so many people.
Who are they?
I haven’t done anything that scares me not to look in their eyes even if they are staring me.
I don’t find any reason to believe them.

As far as the language is concerned, I didn’t learned the big words because I didn’t went to school nor did I spent my life being a "porn novelist" like many people over here.
Hmmm ... I must not be replying over here when I am drunk.. maybe that's it!

~R~

 

[Etoile]

I don’t accept what people tell me to do. Some don’t like it. But I can’t follow them just because they said so.

And that is exactly why your quest will fail. As I have said multiple times, and as others have said, you must want to do this yourself. You have just admitted that you won't accept what a random person tells you to do simply because they say so. So how can you possibly hope to follow a dominant's orders? The strength to improve must come from within. Good luck.

Yes, in face of so many people.
Who are they?
I haven’t done anything that scares me not to look in their eyes even if they are staring me.
I don’t find any reason to believe them.

1. Everybody in this thread.
2. Then why did you come here and ask this?

 

[BiBunny]

Miss BiBunny:

Some ten years back .. a bully called me the poor boy ...



Three years later he was begging at my feet ... ofcourse he did died after that ...

Its so easy to make fun of anyone .. but that aint working wen u got to do it on their faces !!

If that was supposed to be a threat, I'm not impressed. I have men begging at my feet on a fairly regular basis, so BFD.

BTW: Apologies for those comments .. if they sound like a threat .. I really dont like that kind of attitude ... if people take care about it in future ... I will do take care about it in future !

That is 100% proof that you won't take responsibility for your own actions. It's always someone else's fault, isn't it? I dated someone like that for nearly 2 years, so I can see it coming from a mile away. Grow up.

Maybe get that fucking chip off your shoulder and accept that if a whole group of people unequivocally tell you that you need to get help and face up to your own issues, then maybe they know what they're talking about. I concur with Etoile that one person can't be that damn stupid, so I doubt you're for real, anyway. The fact that my initial post with useful advice was overlooked certainly suggests that.

If, in fact, you are real, then I will re-iterate what I said earlier. Look into choice theory/reality therapy or deal with the fact that you will someday run into someone who is bigger and badder than you, and they'll make you WISH you'd taken our advice.

I'm going to stop wasting my breath now.

 

[Rusty_Rider]

And that is exactly why your quest will fail. As I have said multiple times, and as others have said, you must want to do this yourself. You have just admitted that you won't accept what a random person tells you to do simply because they say so. So how can you possibly hope to follow a dominant's orders? The strength to improve must come from within. Good luck.

1. Everybody in this thread.
2. Then why did you come here and ask this?

I thought only I had crazy head.
I am amazed that you dont understand the difference between following the instructions of the dom and accepting what these guys said.
I would do exactly what the dom (the one I am looking for) would ask me to do. I dont think I need to do what three or four people came up with.
The dom will be knowing about me, everything. U know nothing.

1) Nope .. they are not all. Only a bunch of you came up telling me to do things which u think is right. And denial to accept what u said is what u cant accept at all.
2)Yes, you are right. I came here to look for something and those few people dont represent everything. I am again astonished to see how u believe that only a few people are everything here ?
I have talked to some people over here that gives a very different look to this board than what I got here.

~R~

 

[Etoile]

I thought only I had crazy head.
I am amazed that you dont understand the difference between following the instructions of the dom and accepting what these guys said.
I would do exactly what the dom (the one I am looking for) would ask me to do. I dont think I need to do what three or four people came up with.
The dom will be knowing about me, everything. U know nothing.

1) Nope .. they are not all. Only a bunch of you came up telling me to do things which u think is right. And denial to accept what u said is what u cant accept at all.
2)Yes, you are right. I came here to look for something and those few people dont represent everything. I am again astonished to see how u believe that only a few people are everything here ?
I have talked to some people over here that gives a very different look to this board than what I got here.

~R~

 

[Rusty_Rider]

I would have expected it from you considering ur 'intellect'.
I believe you are not on this thread to help out anything, Right?

~R~

 

[Etoile]

I would have expected it from you considering ur 'intellect'.
I believe you are not on this thread to help out anything, Right?

~R~

 

[Rusty_Rider]

If that was supposed to be a threat, I'm not impressed. I have men begging at my feet on a fairly regular basis, so BFD.
That is 100% proof that you won't take responsibility for your own actions.[/quote[

I meant to say 'I didnt liked ur behaviour, do take care of it in future.'
I can see that you cannot take responsibility of ur own words or actions.

It's always someone else's fault, isn't it? I dated someone like that for nearly 2 years, so I can see it coming from a mile away. Grow up.

Well if someone comes and hits me on my face, he/she will get it back. But I will take the responsibilty of the broken jaw.
What your date was, I can see that.

Maybe get that fucking chip off your shoulder and accept that if a whole group of people unequivocally tell you that you need to get help and face up to your own issues, then maybe they know what they're talking about. I concur with Etoile that one person can't be that damn stupid, so I doubt you're for real, anyway. The fact that my initial post with useful advice was overlooked certainly suggests that.

If, in fact, you are real, then I will re-iterate what I said earlier. Look into choice theory/reality therapy or deal with the fact that you will someday run into someone who is bigger and badder than you, and they'll make you WISH you'd taken our advice.

I know what I can run into. You dont worry about that. You must worry what u can run into. That will benifit you.

Frankly speaking, all ur "do this" are based on what you "think" of me and not what u know of me. You insist I must follow ur advice based on ur assumptions. Ofcourse people are that stupid.

I'm going to stop wasting my breath now.

I dont think u can control ur tounge.

Above all .. dont try to turn this thread into a battle field.
If you arent here to help, u know what to do.

~R~

 

[A Desert Rose]

I almost peed my pants

This is what I mean by entertaining...

 

[Rusty_Rider]

It really doesnt matter what you think. Not at all.
please dont try to change the face of this thread. Even if its ugliest thing, it is meant to be that way.

I hope this aint a big expectation.
~R~

 

[A Desert Rose]

Since I lost my decoder ring, could someone translate this for me, please:

...
I know what I can run into. You dont worry about that. You must worry what u can run into. That will benifit you.

Frankly speaking, all ur "do this" are based on what you "think" of me and not what u know of me. You insist I must follow ur advice based on ur assumptions. Ofcourse people are that stupid...

~R~

 

[Etoile]

It really doesnt matter what you think. Not at all.
please dont try to change the face of this thread. Even if its ugliest thing, it is meant to be that way.

I hope this aint a big expectation.
~R~

Aw, okay. I will sit back and let other people come on here and tell you the same things I have - that you're stubborn and won't listen to people who are answering your questions. CM and BB have said this too, but you didn't like it from me or them, so I'll let even MORE other people come and say it.

Bring it on, folks.

 

[Etoile]

Since I lost my decoder ring, could someone translate this for me, please:

I still detect non-native speaker tendencies, but I dunno.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I still detect non-native speaker tendencies, but I dunno.

I think that's very astute of you and I think you're probably right.

I'm stealing that cat/lion picture... It's toooo fucking funny.