"Sub" isn't something to be ashamed of...

[SpectreT]

I have not knowingly offered any bias toward or against anyone. If you feel i've offended you in that way, please point my errors out to me, here or in private. I think i usually choose my words very carefully, and have done so for a long time.

Additionally, throughout this thread (and in this forum) i try very hard to be careful to choose words to indicate the depth of my feelings about being fully submissive. To me, my submssion is not and will never be only the first stop on the BDSM Express - and i am taken aback at anyone who implies that being fully submissive is *anything* but as honorable and needful a way of being as are either of the others.

I didn't think my simple little bit of frustration would offend anyone; if anything i expected it to generate a little bit of discussion on what it is to be fully sub as opposed to being switch or being Dom/me. Excuse my gall in posting on this to begin with, then. I was obviously incorrect in my assumptions. One may not, it seems, speak out on this subject here, or at least i may not. Maybe i may not in this way? Which? In any case, shall i delete this horrible thread now or later?

Don't look at me.... you gotta work to offend me, and to get me in a discussion, all you have to do is post an unpopular idea or thought. Even if I don't agree, I'm likely to try and take up the case. I'm a compulsive Devil's Advocate.

In this case, I see the point. Allow me to say that those who are fully submissive are a little awe-inspiring to me, at least in the depths of their strength. My own strength is, like so many other parts of myself, divided.

 

[SpectreT]

Re: Then why the need ..

to defend oneself when anyone utters a different opinion?

I still say that there is a bias here. and that is my opinion.
Also, I did not say that it was aimed at anyone, I was stating MY opinion.

Ebony

In the interest of a (preferably) non-adversarial discussion, to satisfy my curiosity, on what do you base your opinion? I have been known to be a bit thick, so I may have missed something. In other words: What's your perspective?

 

[Ebonyfire]

And

cymbidia wrote:

" Excuse my gall in posting on this to begin with, then. I was obviously incorrect in my assumptions. One may not, it seems, speak out on this subject here, or at least i may not. "

Just what the hell does that mean?

Am I not entitled to state my opinion too? It goes both ways, cym.

Ebony

 

[Desdemona]

Re: Re: Then why the need ..

On second thought.... I think I'll just sit this one out.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Re: Then why the need ..

On second thought.... I think I'll just sit this one out.

Jump on in, the water is fine. Maybe a tad hot! Contrary to popular opinion, I am not "offended". I am just trying to find out what is going on.

Ebony

 

[Desdemona]

Thanks for the invitation. However, by the time I posted my question, you had already answered it and I decided to back out of the discussion. I don't really have anything to add at this point.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Then why the need ..

In the interest of a (preferably) non-adversarial discussion, to satisfy my curiosity, on what do you base your opinion? I have been known to be a bit thick, so I may have missed something. In other words: What's your perspective?

Since it is my opinion, I do not have to base it on anything but my own thoughts and observations. In other words, I am not seeking agreement from anyone on this board. I am stating my point of view. To do otherwise is to invite debate. I never debate my opinions. And I do not ask others to defend or debate their own.

If you do not see any bias, then that is your experience. I do not discount it. Do not discount mine either.

Ebony

 

[James Blandings]

I have moderated online discussion groups, and I found that one problem you have as a moderator is that people put more weight on your posts than they do on those of the other posters. A simple expression of opinion by a moderator can be misinterpreted as an expression of official policy or attitude.
Without taking sides in this dispute, and with none but the friendliest intentions, I would advise both moderators and posters to keep this in mind.

 

[cellis]

I took no offense, cym, from the beginning... I understand and admire the strength submissives...

I bow to you and your knowledge... and often quote you to Himself and call you the queen of all submissives. (I call you this with the upmost respect.)

I am just searching for my place... exploring new avenues... I personally think those who know who they are whether, submissive or Dominant, are much luckier than someone like me who thought I knew who I was and all of sudden realized that things are changing and evolving in my life.

As to thread, cym, it would be wrong to delete it just because you have the power. You have created a true discussion... a means for open exchange... a forum for an exchange of ideas. This is what it is all about.

Leave things as they are. We will all grow from this.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I have moderated online discussion groups, and I found that one problem you have as a moderator is that people put more weight on your posts than they do on those of the other posters. A simple expression of opinion by a moderator can be misinterpreted as an expression of official policy or attitude.
Without taking sides in this dispute, and with none but the friendliest intentions, I would advise both moderators and posters to keep this in mind.

So true, but at the end of the day, moderators are human too and just as likely to have an opinion as anybody on the board. As such, IMO now and before becoming a moderator, neither moderator nor other posters need feel they should repress their POV for the sake of others unless it becomes downright abusive and flaming in which case it becomes a matter of respecting the common place we share. Hopefully moderators are people who are part of the community they moderate, not just an outside Big Brother type sent to watch over the 'little people'.

Interesting discussion on subs though, and the way people perceive each other and their words.

Catalina