LMAO - I ain't big enuff to be a Grizzly - Annie always referred to me as a wolverine. A little ball of muscle with such a nasty disposition that nobody wants to mess with it...
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Precisely!Okay, a wolverine it is then. I bet they'd never compare as cuddly as polar bears, so there!
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I look and I don't see,
I listen and all I hear is the refrigerator
And my back itches and there is no one to scratch it,
And it needs a good scrubbing...
I got one of those, and another thing that works like a towel. There are devices of all sorts, but the fact remains - the very best they will be is second place. Which is my issue with what remains of my life, the very best it can be will be second place. An also ran. The first loser.Turn the lights on for crissakes!
Okays, so tune into a music station and turn the sound UP!
Find yourself a tree, that's what bears do http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44097000/jpg/_44097972_lastrub_203.jpg
When is your birthday? I'm getting you one of these http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/31SAP76X4EL._AA280_.jpg
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Hey there little Bit! I been busy, like a one legged feller in a butt kickin' contest and the like...
Lets see, I went to lunch with Nikki one of these days, and there was some football, on two different days, twice each day!
And I got me a cherry 2002 Nissan Skyline GT-R and I been racing it when I get a chance. And there was some guitar playin, and some song learnin' and some listening to drum licks and trying to figure out how to play a bass with a computer that has no key board. What else...
Oh, yesterday I took the RJ unit in for his lab work. It was the first time I've seen since the operation. Damn, the boy looks frail. We laughed and joked it up and talked music theory - it blew him away when I showed him I could sight sing tablature. Or my singing hurt something inside his ears, one... Anyhow, after awhile you forget that he is wearing a surgical mask and carrying around a bag of pee in some designer tote that CJ had bought for the purpose. I sure hope things smooth out for the kid and he can get back to where he was before the operation.
And then I got all a-tangle with a new idea to replace all the other ideas I've had about how to set the suspensions on these race cars up and not have it take me a week of testing and driving. This new one looks promising...
And then, and then, and THEN... right in the middle of all that, while I was a hoppin in the air and trying to kick and not fall on my butt, the mail man walked up handed me the new issue of Flatpicking magazine...
And the thing that really chaps my ass... I have been trying to feel sorry for myself lately about missing the b'geezus out of my Annie, but all this other crap keeps gettin' in the way...
lol - 'mornin' little BitWhere's a camera when you need one?...You and the big guy and a designer bag of pee
Morning Chief
I got one of those, and another thing that works like a towel. There are devices of all sorts, but the fact remains - the very best they will be is second place. Which is my issue with what remains of my life, the very best it can be will be second place. An also ran. The first loser.
My birthday, I think, is just a few days after yours...
Rats! I got to haul the Nikki Unit to the Dentist... I'll respond when I get back. See, I beg to differ too...I beg to differ. Your life will be what you make of it. If your mind is set to making it second place, that's what it's going to be. But it won't be fate or circumstances, it will be your doing.
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Rats! I got to haul the Nikki Unit to the Dentist... I'll respond when I get back. See, I beg to differ too...
It's enough to make you head spin.
Uh... where?
First, let me assure you that this is not a depths of depression whaaaa... Some of the conclusions have been the steps taken to get out of such places, actually. Primarily, this is the result of having accepted that it is what it is, and there is nothing that can be done about it so expending effort in that direction is fool hardy.I beg to differ. Your life will be what you make of it. If your mind is set to making it second place, that's what it's going to be. But it won't be fate or circumstances, it will be your doing.
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First, let me assure you that this is not a depths of depression whaaaa... Some of the conclusions have been the steps taken to get out of such places, actually. Primarily, this is the result of having accepted that it is what it is, and there is nothing that can be done about it so expending effort in that direction is fool hardy.
I will state that to think that any occurrance from here on out is a second place event. A quite simple way to look at it - Anne is not here to share it with me. Discussion past that point is moot. In fact, the actions of a life without Anne in many cases are more hurtfull than anything else. Standing on the beach of Lake Superior and watching the Sun set was a beautiful thing, half way across the country, seeing a sight I hadn't really expected to see. I wish I hadn't seen it. Seeing it without Anne diminished it to the point that it irritated me. Any further ideas of sight seeing have been dropped from the list. There is no sense in going someplace to see something if Anne is not with me.
For this to change would mean that I would have to get to a point that I no longer care that Anne is not with me. It would mean that I have decided that it is acceptable that she is dead - eh... that's the way it goes. Life is for the living... yada, yada.
An even more reprehensible thought would be to find myself in a position to actual celebrate her death. If Anne hadn't died, this grand thing would not have happened to me. Look at the snazzy life I have, if that cancer hadn't got the ole lady, this never would have happened. My logging company failing is one of those, so many things that are the result of that failure and our subsiquent move to Oklahoma. Will I find myself in that situation concerning Anne some day. If it is remotely possible, then I am not going there. That is a situation that I never ever want to find myself in... glad that Anne died.
Anne is not here, she is not coming back. She is gone as my wife forever. This is not some romantic sigh, but a flat out blantant assed fact. To say any other thing is folly and not supportable except in some metaphysical sense.
So when I say that the remainder of my life is a second place event, it is not some ploy. It is a fact. It can be nothing other than that.
Alone. That is another fact. An immutable one. To think otherwise is to once again entertain folly. One might contend that I have the kids, the grand kids, etc... Look me in the eye when you tell me that. Tell me that you got no problem trading Nick in on your buddies.
So then, "You'll meet somebody..." Now who is casting pennies into the puddle? Who is counting on Serendipity - a flat out miracle?
The idea that I could get involved with someone else is propostrous. First, who would have me. I am pretty well shot, unemployed, fairly excentric in a number of ways. I have whittled it down to a kind of catch 22 statement.
The woman I want has no use for me,
and I want nothing to do with the woman that wants me.
This is not a pitty party. Just a pragmatic look at the facts.
So, there it is. There is nothing that can be done about it. Any of it. There will be some stuff happen, some of it will be neat. That will be cool. But it won't be no big deal.
Not without Anne.
I wouldn't have it any other way...Well no matter what We love ya and your stuck with this crazy ass bunch
I gotta getting going...work calls
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I guess I don't know how to respond to that Scott.
I want to ask your friend, "What is your take on how your life has turned out?"
He sounds like he has a Pastor's heart.
He sounds like an interesting fellow to meet and know. And it sounds like he is a good friend to and for you.george55 said:
LOL - the very reason I have had to forego the rum in my coffee bit...george55 said:and as for replying..........after downing another drink....not sure what the true meaning was in the first place......................
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and here we are, close to four and having this deep discussion....and no rum left..........He sounds like an interesting fellow to meet and know. And it sounds like he is a good friend to and for you.
LOL - the very reason I have had to forego the rum in my coffee bit...
