The UK Kink Thread

[Malich]

I was wishing that I had the mental power to explode heads for at least an hour after that!

you don't need mental power. just a shotgun or a big hammer

 

[sharonfac]

I have problems with weight. but talking about the exercise thing, I find that walking my dogs give me quite a lot of exercise at a pace that doesn't hurt my diabetic feet too badly. I walk my dogs in three batches so that makes me out most of the morning most days reallly, some like to walk slow some a bit faster. Like you Gyms are out of the question as I cannot afford them and I am a longish way from anything like that.

 

[Malich]

I have problems with weight. but talking about the exercise thing, I find that walking my dogs give me quite a lot of exercise at a pace that doesn't hurt my diabetic feet too badly. I walk my dogs in three batches so that makes me out most of the morning most days reallly, some like to walk slow some a bit faster. Like you Gyms are out of the question as I cannot afford them and I am a longish way from anything like that.

I'd love to have a dog again, great for exercise... but with my working schedule it would not be fair on the poor thing

And welcome to the thread.

 

[LallyH]

I'd love to have a dog again, great for exercise... but with my working schedule it would not be fair on the poor thing

And welcome to the thread.

Hi Sharon

Same here with having a dog - the kids would love one, but we're out all day. Our neighbours had a dog but worked full time, and on my days off, I would listen to her unhappy whining and howling all day. Heartbreaking

 

[Malich]

Hi Sharon

Same here with having a dog - the kids would love one, but we're out all day. Our neighbours had a dog but worked full time, and on my days off, I would listen to her unhappy whining and howling all day. Heartbreaking

Yeah, I can't understand why people would do that to an animal. They're social creatures. they need companion ship. If i worked in the city and could get home for 30 minutes at lunch time it would be a different matter.

 

[Mindfondler]

Morning Lally, Malich, Daisy, Sharon! (Hi to anyone else that I missed)

So you can get started on this rhubarb one then now, can you?

I'll start clearing some space for it! I mean, by having a run later.

Oh, and I think I should mention (before she does) that Daisy and I have discovered that my iPad autocorrect function has a nasty case of Tourette's.

So if I suddenly start becoming abusive, give me 5 minutes to rectify before you assume that I mean it....

Heh... so far I haven't managed to embarrass myself too much with that (or, at least, no more than usual).

The worst one that I can remember was when I texted a friend to say that I'd meet her in Poole. I received a puzzled reply from her to ask whether I meant London. On checking my outgoing message, I saw that the predictive text entry had rendered "Poole" as "Smoke".

I am knackered because some asshats walked down our street at 3am yelling and screaming to wake everyone up. Once I was woken from a deep sleep it was hard to get back grrrrr!

I second your "Grrr!". My wife and I were woken up at about the same time last night, by an alarm in a property down the road which carried on for 30 minutes. Once that had finished, though, the local foxes came out to play with the rubbish that some neighbours had left out. The unearthly noises that they made were very difficult to ignore, and could readily be adopted in a movie as the sounds of scary aliens.

I have problems with weight. but talking about the exercise thing, I find that walking my dogs give me quite a lot of exercise at a pace that doesn't hurt my diabetic feet too badly. I walk my dogs in three batches so that makes me out most of the morning most days reallly, some like to walk slow some a bit faster. Like you Gyms are out of the question as I cannot afford them and I am a longish way from anything like that.

I don't like Gyms anyway. I have the image of them being hateful places full of muscular show-offs who would make me feel completely inadequate. A while ago, I won a month's free trial membership to one, so I went along to find out whether my impression was valid. In fact, the place was almost empty every time that I went along. No wonder they have to charge so much for proper membership!
.

 

[Malich]

We have foxes round here. I see them once a week generally and hear them most nights if I am awake. I find it strangely comforting.

 

[LallyH]

We've got two dwarf rabbits who are very naughty. We've had to move the run off the lawn because they kept re-enacting the Great Escape, including multiple tunnels just to fool us. Now it's on concrete for a while to curb their enthusiasm.

So this morning, they got their own back. Daughter looked out of the window to see one rabbit lying face down, legs straight out with the other one nudging it in a 'please don't be dead' type manner.

Daughter dashes out in a panic, bag of food in hand, and both rabbits jump to the door waiting to be fed.

Little swine...

 

[Malich]

We've got two dwarf rabbits who are very naughty. We've had to move the run off the lawn because they kept re-enacting the Great Escape, including multiple tunnels just to fool us. Now it's on concrete for a while to curb their enthusiasm.

So this morning, they got their own back. Daughter looked out of the window to see one rabbit lying face down, legs straight out with the other one nudging it in a 'please don't be dead' type manner.

Daughter dashes out in a panic, bag of food in hand, and both rabbits jump to the door waiting to be fed.

Little swine...

"Wake up you lazy fuzz ball. they're awake. It'll be breakfast soon"

"Go away, it's too nice to be awake"

 

[LallyH]

Think it was more....

"They're really mean stopping all our digging fun. Just because we ruined their lawn and ran riot around the neighbours' gardens."

"Tell you what, you pretend to be dead, I'll pretend to be really upset. Then when they run out in a panic, we can shout 'FOOLED YOU'!!!"

My mum would have made a pie with the pair of them...

 

[Malich]

Think it was more....

"They're really mean stopping all our digging fun. Just because we ruined their lawn and ran riot around the neighbours' gardens."

"Tell you what, you pretend to be dead, I'll pretend to be really upset. Then when they run out in a panic, we can shout 'FOOLED YOU'!!!"

My mum would have made a pie with the pair of them...

Well, that too perhaps

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

Hi Sharon, welcome to the thread

I have been quite naughty and walked lil girl to school mornings this week, my physio is going to have a fit, but I just cannot sit around all day, it is doing me in!
Came home to find the street full of police, no clue why, but there were enough of them to marshal a riot.

Hi Mal, yeah shotguns would also work, but that would mean having to get out of bed, load up and pull the trigger, with my evil power, I could just lay in bed and send explosive vibes to the asshat in question, then boom! (I am feeling much repressed rage right now )

Lally, I can't wait for the next awsome autocorrect
I don't do rabbitts (well not of the living, breathing variety) I am so allergic to the damn things. Pie sounds good tho!

MF, we have families of foxes round here, they stink!! Poo everywhere..blech!

 

[Malich]

MF, we have families of foxes round here, they stink!! Poo everywhere..blech!

yeah, our dogs back at my parents seamed to love rolling in fox droppings.

 

[LallyH]

yeah, our dogs back at my parents seamed to love rolling in fox droppings.

And those of us currently eating lunch thank you kindly for that image....

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

yeah, our dogs back at my parents seamed to love rolling in fox droppings.

Oh yuk yes, what is that all about!

 

[Malich]

Mwahahahaha.

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

Ok, if you had an evil super power, what would it be?

 

[Malich]

Ok, if you had an evil super power, what would it be?

Competent goons

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

Competent goons

Hahaha yes! How is it thet they are so inept at their chosen employment?

 

[Malich]

Hahaha yes! How is it thet they are so inept at their chosen employment?

http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

Brilliant!

 

[Malich]

Brilliant!

it's an oldie.... but a goodie. There used to be a longer version that ran to about 150 points.

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

it's an oldie.... but a goodie. There used to be a longer version that ran to about 150 points.

Many Bond villan cockups!
I love how they always set something in motion that will kill Bond, then wander off to do more eviling.

But a super power opposed to competant staff...

 

[Malich]

Many Bond villan cockups!
I love how they always set something in motion that will kill Bond, then wander off to do more eviling.

But a super power opposed to competant staff...

A competent staff IS a super power.

but other than that... I'd like to be the evil equivalent to Tony Stark. intelligent, well funded, lots of high tech.

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

A competent staff IS a super power.

but other than that... I'd like to be the evil equivalent to Tony Stark. intelligent, well funded, lots of high tech.

Sat at a computer plotting the downfall of some rugged hero type