The ULTIMATE Masochist

[Recidiva]

I've been thinking... and it's lead me to ask this question, and I hope someone can answer it - even if to the negative.


Are there men out there who want, fantasize about chivalrous love? Love that cannot be consummated - and not just through say actual intercourse. Are there men that think highly of an ideal sort of love wherein you can never live or touch with the object of your desire? Do you consider yourself a masochist regardless or because of this desire. Why?

There are people like this, but the stress of it is difficult. I don't think it's masochism, but it is a level of honesty that most people don't reach. When I'm married and attracted to someone else, I can say they're attractive and if things were different...but they're clearly not. I don't have to reject a guy or lie about him not being attractive, I just have to also say "I can't and I won't."

When people are attracted but otherwise occupied and serious about keeping their agreements, you can have a level of friendship that has an extra level of magnetism. But these have got to be people with a high level of patience and an ability to take something for what it is and what it can be, and not what you want it to be "if things were different."

It can be a fun thing to be "friends without benefits" in a way that there just isn't an option for it, but you can share a limited space together of "if things were different." Breaking out of that space, though...usually the end of the friendship.

Chivalry is a code, with limits and expectations. Respect and boundaries are inherent. You can run up to the fence and giggle and wave, and run away, but you can't tear it down. Or you can fly around forever, but no landing.