Three Footer

[Svenskaflicka]

If we're talking 1 foot per 20 kg body weight, then my toilet bowl won't suffice...

 

[TheEarl]

What's 60kg in stones and pounds?

The Earl

 

[Svenskaflicka]

25 kgs = 55 pounds.

 

[MathGirl]

Metrology

1Kg = 2.2lb

Doesn't a stone weigh like 14 pounds?

 

[SlickTony]

I don't see how anyone can actually produce a three-foot turd. And yes, I thought the thread was going to be a three-foot something else, too. I think they're both apocryphal.

 

[MathGirl]

I don't see how anyone can actually produce a three-foot turd. .

I guess that's the stuff of which dreams are made.

 

[NoJo]

I don't see how anyone can actually produce a three-foot turd. And yes, I thought the thread was going to be a three-foot something else, too. I think they're both apocryphal.

Actually one's apocryphal, the other's coprophical.

Once, while sufferring a bad case of writer's blockage I calculated* that an angled conveyor belt moving at approx. 0.1 m/s placed below the squatter could produce turds of the this length. It would make a good tenth grade science project.


*I worked it out with a pencil

 

[Chicklet]

Considering how gross this thread is, how come I can't stop reading it???

that is such a good question. such a good question...<wanders off mumbling>

 

[MathGirl]

Order from chaos

Actually one's apocryphal, the other's coprophical. Hur hur I calculated* that an angled conveyor belt moving at approx. 0.1 m/s placed below the squatter could produce turds of the this length. It would make a good tenth grade science project.

I think we had better define some terms here to keep this on a pseudoscientific basis.

The length of the matter in question has nothing to do with how it ends up. It makes no difference if it becomes a double helix or resembles a neon sign saying "Arnolds Bar." It's the length as it emerges that counts. No conveyor belts moving at one decimeter/sec are required.

Also, it isn't necessary to squat from a high place because of the reason delineated in the preceeding paragraph.

In addition, the writer of that book which started this whole thing didn't specity anything about diameter or weight. Personally, I would think these factors would be more important than the fact that the thing originated at about the ..... producer's throat.

I wish I hadn't already done my doctoral research. This seems to open an entirely new area of research opportunity.

 

[MathGirl]

Thread

Considering how gross this thread is, how come I can't stop reading it???

Well, it's one of the few things that absolutely everyone does. It transcends race, religion, gender, age, intellect. It's simply something we all have in common, and on a more or less daily basis. Think of the shared experience as a uniting factor for all mankind. Gives you a warm feeling, doesn't it?

 

[The_Fool]

Re: Thread

Well, it's one of the few things that absolutely everyone does. It transcends race, religion, gender, age, intellect. It's simply something we all have in common, and on a more or less daily basis. Think of the shared experience as a uniting factor for all mankind. Gives you a warm feeling, doesn't it?

*Pained look* You really didn't have to bring up warm did you?

 

[pop_54]

Hi again

On the subject of *warm* can't see anyone producing one of these record breakers after several pints of Guiness and a Vindaloo curry, you'd need some kind of scientific instrument to measure it as it came out of the poo chute at approaching the speed of sound, well it usually hits the pan before the fart sound is heard. Wouldn't want to stand too close either.

Gross what's gross about this thread.

pops...........

 

[MathGirl]

Re: Hi again

On the subject of *warm* can't see anyone producing one of these record breakers after several pints of Guiness and a Vindaloo curry, you'd need some kind of scientific instrument to measure it as it came out of the poo chute at approaching the speed of sound, well it usually hits the pan before the fart sound is heard. Wouldn't want to stand too close either.

Good grief! I start an interesting, tasteful, thread with many socially redeeming aspects, and now look what we have! Sometimes I despair.

Ora pro nobis