Tihmmnmmish's Very Laid-Back Summery Poolside Threadcast

[UnderYourSpell]

As I said before critique and suggestion I can take but of late the critique hs been left in a manner none too kind. When I sometimes post silly little ditties like Ode to a dung beetle it's done to make people smile I had another one in the pipeline but am afraid to submit incase someone doesn't see it as fun but as stupid

 

[EroticOrogeny]

okay i don't know who it is and don't have time to read all the threads/poems to find out. do you understand what i mean by useful critique and useless critique? if it is not based in the words of the poem and how they are written then it's not of use to the poet. if it is, then look carefully at what's said and see if there is some measure of usefulness in what was said.

i have to say, the most freeing and useful thing i ever did on this site was to turn off the voting. i instantly had the confidence i needed to simply write and share my writing. spending half my free time worrying about troll votes was a complete waste of my energy that was far better spent in writing and critiquing.

i guess the votes are tied in with the survivor contest? if that's the case, then perhaps those votes/comments could be scrutinised by the moderators or Laurel and could be deleted...? i obviously need to spend more time reading the threads.

from what i've read of a few of your poems in the last half hour, the only comments of use to you should relate directly to your rhyming and/or count per row (i've completely forgotten the name for that last thing). you seem to have fairly good concrete images in the half dozen poems i've read, i don't see a problem with that.

the occasional clout on an ear hole doesn't tend to stop us writing. don't let it stop you if it happens. you're a poet.



be back when i can. enjoy your day. i need to hit the sack. night night. er... good morning. lol

Survivor doesn't have any connection to votes, just form for some and some triggers (some quite weird).
Votes are subjective (I could be +/- 1 for a given poem from day to day), but do provide some sort of quantitative feedback (as does number of comments). Certainly votes off and comments on is better than votes on and comments off - you can be sure I won't just vote if that's my only choice.

 

[hmmnmm]

water, son, and the lordly flotsam--
when were we when we were young?
an' we wars 'n loo, an' our hopes poured Adam's ale
o'er keck 'n stain o' ye Baptis' table-tapper,
stays 'n jumps an' lewdly quick steps the same,
am eye yer rigadoon? nibble-nibble per turning peck
in lorry framed hours and front seat embrasure,

now 'ear our fickle moth-breathren Mother Superior,
an' flicker rosy posy queenly meanly mayflower:
mine pilgrim sim. eye leave but take no parts,
pour silly sticky goopy stars 'n highs an' she-sour flows,
lowely berry neck-fast counting berry prayer
crosswisecrissexcruciates seven and six and seven,
and limbic expectation, and seven and seven

eyes open her at six and seven, and each stanza's sick
plus one, plus one, save the meddling stanza's sick magnolia,
womb afternoon like de fleur de gre entomb, rise sunny side
de mano arma virumque cano, eye itching yoo-hoo girly bride,
were Tappan-Zee beheading an' Nelson A. Roca-Baptista?
heigh-ho, feller, wordsy kurdsy omni. peacock-wrangle,
servant and dock, I've no drug bitter hen mien triste
Art Nouveau angeliformica

Well thanks. I think.
I didn't have anything like that on the lists I was working on. Your cross-something-sex-something. Very inventive.

Shall I continue the pecking on it? Or was I too tardy?

 

[hmmnmm]

I'd like to echo support for the turn-off-the-voting plan. I too was advised by WSO and Tris, and am glad I went that way. One brief stretch I tried having them on, also for a test, to get a rough gauge on what, out of poetry, prose, audio, or illustrated, seemed to be the more positively received, because I was as usual confused which way to go with life and pursuits, and shit. It never felt really comfortable. So I turned them back off, and immediately snipped away a subtle source of mental irritation. But for some people, the voting works, and I'll be the last person to knock someone using the available options in ways that work best for them.


To me, the idea of voting on a poem would be like going to a nightclub or bar that had artwork on the walls, and instead of just enjoying the moment and the place, maybe glance at the artwork now and then, each art piece had a little row of buttons that let you vote on the piece. What if you were in a bad mood or a critical mood when you first saw it? You go cast your vote of 1? Then later or another night, you look at it again, see something different, realize you begin to like it more and more. Now you'd like to give it a 5. But you can't, because you already voted in haste. Maybe another time you're feeling slightly more critical as the last time but not as critical as the first time. A 3 or 4 seems more appropriate... but you already voted your 1. I'm having a hard time seeing how reliable those numbers can be to indicate whether someone's poetry or prose reached someone at any level.


To tangentially relate to a discussion in progress elsewhere: There are some persons who seem to insinuate that if strings of red H's and blue W's do not appear next to a Litster's list of stories and poems, that it means the Litster is a bad writer. Or writes poorly. Or can't write. Has no idea how to put in words what is seen in the mind or felt in the heart. I'm wondering if I should resent such an insinuation. Well of course I do. But should I say it out loud, here? Sure. I resent that insinuation. Worse, I have a hard time respecting future words of literary wisdom from someone who expresses such a narrow view of... these things.

 

[hmmnmm]

Resentment has cooled since the last entry. Am about forty minutes from going to get a tooth yanked out, so maybe the resentment will gently transform to... well, a much softer, vaguely synonymous version.

In any event, the person who thinks the goal of writing a story should be a red H, and the having of an H automatically equals something well-written and the lack of a red H automatically equals something not-well-written... that's a person who I would definitely not approach to seek a critical eye to my work. No reliable credibility.

On a more positive note, it's good to be able to identify these sorts, so, in case you ever do actively request feedback, you'll know to discount whatever these persons have to say. Because one, instead of two, motives are assumed.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Oh well I've submitted my epic challenge which may not be epic enough lol

 

[hmmnmm]

Oh well I've submitted my epic challenge which may not be epic enough lol

Good for you babe.

I just experienced a reason to speak a favorable word about dentists. One two three, he plucks the tooth, no doomsday lectures... ten seconds max. Feelin' good, feeling bright and back on top. All that stress and pain, all that worry... for no reason.

So there is now zero resentment.

It's cool.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I don't like writing long poems it's boring I'd never make a good novelist
Did you have an injection have you now got a numb tongue and dribbling lol?

 

[hmmnmm]

I don't like writing long poems it's boring I'd never make a good novelist
Did you have an injection have you now got a numb tongue and dribbling lol?

It'll take me longer to compose and submit this post than the entire extraction procedure took, from injection to getting out of the chair. A little sting, I braced myself for a long and grueling experience, tried to think of something, a fantasy to get lost in, something involving an island of naked women. In the time it took to write that last phrase, it was all over. I was impressed. Still impressed. No drooling. Stings a little bit. Popped a couple pain killers. The ol' pizazz is on the horizon. A thousand times more functional than this morning and in a much better mood. All's well.

I like the idea of writing the long stories and poems. I like the rambling and wandering idea. But I think others don't like to read as much as I enjoy doing. But the short stuff's good too. It's all good. Somehow.

 

[EroticOrogeny]

Good for you babe.

I just experienced a reason to speak a favorable word about dentists. One two three, he plucks the tooth, no doomsday lectures... ten seconds max. Feelin' good, feeling bright and back on top. All that stress and pain, all that worry... for no reason.

So there is now zero resentment.

It's cool.

Often the expectation is a lot worse than the reality.
I read someplace that 'fear ought to be classed with stealing. It seems to cause more trouble'.

 

[EroticOrogeny]

Oh well I've submitted my epic challenge which may not be epic enough lol

Congratulations - I'll be looking forward to reading it.

 

[hmmnmm]

Often the expectation is a lot worse than the reality.
I read someplace that 'fear ought to be classed with stealing. It seems to cause more trouble'.

Hey I like that.
Never thought of it that way.
Fear's a bitch, that's for sure.

 

[hmmnmm]

Dentist & Dean

Someone who knows what the fuck they're doing, make it look easy, yet make no big fuss about it. They know where they are, they express no self-doubts...

The dentist yesterday was that way. Kinda walked around like a general who knew he wouldn't lose. Chat with the receptionist, point to me to go on in and make myself comfortable, a casual mention to go knock out a stronghold, then comes in and tends to my tooth, like he's walking down a grocery store aisle, whistling, grabbing this and that off the shelf. Today I'm feeling great. Still impressed. He also had some really well-done paintings all over the office. Realism/nature stuff. Animals and landscape. Local artist. But, like, top notch quality. Like a theme that was all over the office. Professionalism. Insistence on the best possible everything.

Similarly, I think the DVD player is demonically possessed, because sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Yesterday it worked for a while, and we were able to watch some of the Dean Martin DVDs we ordered. Again: fucking pros. Dean Martin, Jimmy Stewart, Orson Wells... They were so good they made it look easy. But we know it ain't at all easy. They worked their asses off. They experienced failures. They bombed. But they had It. and they persisted. And they were fucking extraordinary. That kind of quality no longer exists in the entertainment industry. Just amazing how good those guys were.

Anyway... such high standards I think are above and will always be above me; but it's inspiring. Something to aim for. And I think it goes far beyond assigning a numerical vote to a story or poem. I think so.

 

[hmmnmm]

Thing is, the Dean Martin stuff... they made mistakes, and the mistakes were what made them interesting. It didn't matter what they did. They were strongly individual enough so they could do whatever they wanted. Butcher a skit or a song or anything, and it still worked. There was no definition of failure.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Have we got to aim for higher things though? Is it ok to be quite happy with middleness or even way down lowly in my comfy little rut if I'm happy there? It's quite alright by me if you step over my head to get to your next rung I'll even give you a leg up and a shove if you need it, just try not to blot out the sun with your big butt

 

[hmmnmm]

They had their own voices. I mean, Jimmy Stewart opens his mouth, and one or two words or an 'uhh' and you know it's him. He was fully and only Jimmy Stewart. He couldn't make any mistakes. No such thing. Jimmy Stewart could do whatever he wanted. I can't help but suspect there's something to glean from his example.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Talk to rabbits it helps

 

[hmmnmm]

Have we got to aim for higher things though? Is it ok to be quite happy with middleness or even way down lowly in my comfy little rut if I'm happy there? It's quite alright by me if you step over my head to get to your next rung I'll even give you a leg up and a shove if you need it, just try not to blot out the sun with your big butt

I don't know, I thought your Knight poem got up there pretty good. Was that your epic?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I don't know, I thought your Knight poem got up there pretty good. Was that your epic?

Yes do you think it's epic enough it told the story of the Knights Templars

 

[hmmnmm]

Yes do you think it's epic enough it told the story of the Knights Templars

Well I don't know enough about epics or the Templars to say. I just know I was impressed with your use of language and dynamics.Your flavor. Your feel. I could never write like that. I wouldn't bother trying. I'd be better off finding my best way, and just lay back and enjoy you doing yours.

See, Orson Wells could never be Jimmy Stewart. and Jimmy Stewart could never be Orson Wells. I wouldn't want two Jimmy Stewarts or two Orson Wells or two Annies. But one of each? yes ma'am, that's just right.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Well I don't know enough about epics or the Templars to say. I just know I was impressed with your use of language and dynamics.Your flavor. Your feel. I could never write like that. I wouldn't bother trying. I'd be better off finding my best way, and just lay back and enjoy you doing yours.

See, Orson Wells could never be Jimmy Stewart. and Jimmy Stewart could never be Orson Wells. I wouldn't want two Jimmy Stewarts or two Orson Wells or two Annies. But one of each? yes ma'am, that's just right.

Lol lot of people glad there's only one me. I am quite passionate if that's the word about Templars ..... I'm married to one

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Do you think I can get away with rhyming sun with bum ....... bum being what you would call a butt

 

[EroticOrogeny]

Have we got to aim for higher things though? Is it ok to be quite happy with middleness or even way down lowly in my comfy little rut if I'm happy there? It's quite alright by me if you step over my head to get to your next rung I'll even give you a leg up and a shove if you need it, just try not to blot out the sun with your big butt

I think it all depends upon you. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. If the rut starts to get too muddy, just make sure you can get out!
Somewhat related is a saying I heard/read a while ago:
'If a job is worth doing, its worth doing half-assed.'

 

[hmmnmm]

it's taking all my strength to restrain an eruption that's been building for a couple years; it really wants to explode into a hell-raising rampage, but if I actually hurt someone I'd feel bad about it afterward.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

go chop some wood