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What Are You Thinking? Continued 14

Desiree_Radcliffe said:
Also, sorry I brought up the Lit relationship thing. I didn't mean for it to turn into a thing. I am sometimes genuinely curious about things in that neurodivergent way that comes off as meddling and negative when I am just frankly curious.
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The topic of this thread is "what are you thinking." So nothing is out of bounds (which is why it gets a little random). But you struck a nerve, so obviously it is on more minds than yours. You have nothing to apologize for.
 
Amanda330 said:
No. I think the standards of friendship apply and are the same no matter where you've met your friends. Loyalty, honesty, trust, kindness, compassion... Those are all qualities I want to bring to any relationship I have with anyone. No matter where I've met them. I have real relationships with real feelings with many people I've met here.

No. Not if you know what you are doing will hurt someone. A lie is a lie is a lie. But also, what is the intent? What is the motivation?

Of course. It doesn't matter where you are, if you are in person or online, we should treat each other with respect. I don't think we all have to like each other but I think so much pain could be avoided if you are kind.

No, not to me. People are here for different reasons. There are things going on in people's lives most know nothing about. And you're on a sex site. Are you going to judge someone for being here because they are married? Where do you draw the line then? I think it's best to take people individually and understand their motivation. Make your decision after getting to know them. Obviously, some people take longer to get to know than others - some people have some tall walls up to protect themselves from the judgement of others here, too.

I think we should always expect honesty but I don't think we ever really know if we have it. You just trust the people you love or you'll always be suspicious. I think lit makes relationships difficult at times because you don't meet in person and you never really know the truth about anything... Every relationship takes a certain level of vulnerability and trust - and we never really know. But that's part of the beauty of relationships. We make ourselves vulnerable to pain because that's the cost of a relationship - any relationship really. When you care about someone you give them the means with which to hurt you. And hopefully they never will.
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I have dated 2 Lit ladies, still friends
 
Desiree_Radcliffe said:
I'd like to write a treatise about the inherent weirdness of Lit relationships. Or maybe someone will just let me observe those who get involved. And do they ever work?
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There are plenty of multi-year Lit relationships where everyone involved is very happy overall, or was for the majority of the relationship.

One trend I’ve noticed is that extremes tend to correlate with less chance of it lasting a longer length of time. If it’s a complete secret permanently, then there’s probably something unpleasant lurking. If things are largely over the top and public constantly, then it’s more likely some over compensating is going on. The strong, happy couples I know that have lasted are open that they’re together and will publicly show affection and interact, but it’s not their whole identity and they’re not necessarily advertising it constantly. They also keep plenty of things for private consumption.

That’s my experience and perspective at least 😊

Desiree_Radcliffe said:
Also, sorry I brought up the Lit relationship thing. I didn't mean for it to turn into a thing. I am sometimes genuinely curious about things in that neurodivergent way that comes off as meddling and negative when I am just frankly curious.
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Don’t be! Conversations are good and it’s normal to have different opinions and reactions.
 
LadyLascivious1 said:
There are plenty of multi-year Lit relationships where everyone involved is very happy overall, or was for the majority of the relationship.

One trend I’ve noticed is that extremes tend to correlate with less chance of it lasting a longer length of time. If it’s a complete secret permanently, then there’s probably something unpleasant lurking. If things are largely over the top and public constantly, then it’s more likely some over compensating is going on. The strong, happy couples I know that have lasted are open that they’re together and will publicly show affection and interact, but it’s not their whole identity and they’re not necessarily advertising it constantly. They also keep plenty of things for private consumption.

That’s my experience and perspective at least 😊


Don’t be! Conversations are good and it’s normal to have different opinions and reactions.
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Spot on! Albeit not relegated to this site specifically.
 
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