Where's The Love?

[Netzach]

Netz, you crack me up. Too funny. Seriously though, what kind of tape do you use to do things like that with?

Clear duct, apparently it sweats off OK. It wasn't even my idea, er all my idea.

Try it only at your own risk kids! Oh, and he's shaved, we're masos but not supermasos here.

 

[callinectes]

Am I the only one here that identifies with Morticia as the Dominant in that 'Family'

Not at all, I also see her as the Dominant.

Besides don't forget that famous line from the Addams Family movie..
Morticia- "Don't torture yourself Gomez, that's my job."

Actually, come to think of it...I think they were both switches!

 

[callinectes]

Clear duct, apparently it sweats off OK. It wasn't even my idea, er all my idea.

Try it only at your own risk kids! Oh, and he's shaved, we're masos but not supermasos here.

Good to know about the clear duct tape, thanks. Not that I plan to make this known to a certain Dominant gentleman, but should the need for this knowledge arise..I'll have it. Thanks!

 

[SpectreT]

Am I the only one here that identifies with Morticia as the Dominant in that 'Family'

Nah, they both had their Dominant moments. When it comes down to cases, she had the slight edge on him though. He was always a little too lofty, snazzy and romantic, while she could be hard and practical whithout once being impolite.

A telling quote, delivered beautifully by Anjelica Houston protraying Morticia in (I think) the first modern Addams Family movie:

"Don't torture yourself, Dear - that's my job."

edit to add:

Not at all, I also see her as the Dominant.

Besides don't forget that famous line from the Addams Family movie..
Morticia- "Don't torture yourself Gomez, that's my job."

Actually, come to think of it...I think they were both switches!

Should've kept reading - someone beat me to it.

 

[Sensual_Caveman]

...How to you and your partner show affection? I am well aware that to some feeling or giving: pain, submission, dominance ext is showing affection. However what happens after a session. I guess all in all I'm wondering if its ok to still "want to be held" at the end of the day....

It is a common misconception that a BDSM relationship is devoid of the vanilla relationship pleasantries, but that is not the case.
My girlfriend is also My submissive, and although we do not live in an overt D/s dynamic 24/7 we always have a sense of the dynamic there. I love her, and I am never shy about telling her that. We are affectionate, and gentle, and playful much of the time. When we do play in a D/s fashion it is hard, and aggressive, and very fulfilling, but it is also loving.
Before finding this relationship I always thought that there would be a deliniation between the BDSM dynamic, and the affectionate loving portions of the relationship. Finding what I have now I know that I can be showing just as much love and affection when I am beating her as I do when I am cuddling her or taking her out to a nice dinner. It is all part of what we need to feel fulfilled, and to give that to each other is always an act of love.

J

 

[pipesoflirael]

Why be in this sort of lifestyle and not show affection? The control aspect on its own is showing affection in a way, showing that you value this person's submission or domination highly enough to endure it. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't want to cuddle! lol. Love the way my Master handles that one. One of my train words is a command to cuddle. Usually comes up after a particularly hard session or just a hard day at school, feeling icky, etc. It's so sweet to have someone ask for that!!

 

[neonflux]

Not at all, I also see her as the Dominant.

Besides don't forget that famous line from the Addams Family movie..
Morticia- "Don't torture yourself Gomez, that's my job."

Actually, come to think of it...I think they were both switches!

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

Ahem......

Can we move our own posts over people if we so desire

 

[neonflux]

Now, finally a serious post...

One of the things that most attracts me to BDSM (besides the fact that I'm clearly wired for it - at the age of 8 or 9 was making my Barbie dolls engage in play that combined "Man from Uncle" spy games and bondage ), is its capacity for deepening intimacy and spiritual connection. Rather than being devoid of affection, my experience has been that conscious engagement in kink strengthens it. As others have already mentioned, the trust and good communication required for both submission and Dominance have enhanced my bonds to my partner, as has the growing self-awareness that I am gaining from BD Ds Sm play. And then there's aftercare.

One of the most loving relationships I have ever encountered is that between two women who have been together for 22 years and in a 24/7 committed Mistress/slave relationship for the last 5 or 6. Often, the Domme uses her status to project her ssubmissive who, for instance, is quite shy and can "rest" in the social convention that one must ask her Mistress to talk to her as a submissive... (I know, the pronouns are becoming rather confusing, LOL.)

Neon

 

[Agincourt]

One of my train words is a command to cuddle. Usually comes up after a particularly hard session or just a hard day at school, feeling icky, etc. It's so sweet to have someone ask for that!!

Yes that is very sweet!

 

[angelsrose]

I have broken down and come close to sobbing durring sex. I don't mind it, and generally He doesn't either.
But at the same time I am in my most vunrable here in that moment. I need the affection after. If he is incapable of giving it to me, he is incapable of treating me fully the way I want to be treated. I like to feel cherished by a man and all of that comes into play durring sex, a scene, or just playing.

At times he will even curtail me from being overly silly in a place that may seem inappropraite. But like last night, I was curled up on him ina restraunt with some friends, I told him I was tired. He took me home promptly. And then stayed and cuddled while I fell asleep. I didn't even notice when he left. We didn't do anything else but cuddle. Which is nice. And sweet.
But he does nice things for me all the time.
Kisses my forehead.
Kisses my neck.
Gives me silly little trinkets that he knows I will like.(glass roses)
Calls me before I go to work, and tells me to have a good day.
Gives me his shirt if I am cold.
Listens when I speak.
Reaches for my hand when we walk.
Cuddles.
Makes me coffee when he sees me walk into his work.(without my asking for it)
Watches me get ready for work.
And so much more.

Its all the little things that make it work for me. Otherwise my interest in sex gets halted. I am finicky that way though. All in all any question I have is answered by the way he looks at me through the day.

 

[Agincourt]

I have broken down and come close to sobbing durring sex. I don't mind it, and generally He doesn't either.
But at the same time I am in my most vunrable here in that moment. I need the affection after. If he is incapable of giving it to me, he is incapable of treating me fully the way I want to be treated. I like to feel cherished by a man and all of that comes into play durring sex, a scene, or just playing.

At times he will even curtail me from being overly silly in a place that may seem inappropraite. But like last night, I was curled up on him ina restraunt with some friends, I told him I was tired. He took me home promptly. And then stayed and cuddled while I fell asleep. I didn't even notice when he left. We didn't do anything else but cuddle. Which is nice. And sweet.
But he does nice things for me all the time.
Kisses my forehead.
Kisses my neck.
Gives me silly little trinkets that he knows I will like.(glass roses)
Calls me before I go to work, and tells me to have a good day.
Gives me his shirt if I am cold.
Listens when I speak.
Reaches for my hand when we walk.
Cuddles.
Makes me coffee when he sees me walk into his work.(without my asking for it)
Watches me get ready for work.
And so much more.

Its all the little things that make it work for me. Otherwise my interest in sex gets halted. I am finicky that way though. All in all any question I have is answered by the way he looks at me through the day.

Thank you so much angelrose. You expressed exactly what my heart longs for in a realationship, I'm so glad to know it can be acheived in the D/s lifestyle. After starting this thread I've come to respect those relationships all the more. Thanks agian!