why do men think they have to lie to get a girl into bed?
- Thread starter wethorny_angel
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OK Here is my question isn't "game" A part of being a "playa"?! Playa is full of lies... And SmOoOOothness.... Just a theory tho.. I might b out of the loop And not have the Lingo down .. So was just a question......
Melissa
Melissa
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ShamelessFlirt
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Q. How can you tell when a man is lying?
A. His lips are moving
The simple answer to your dilemma is to not talk, therefore you can't be lied to. Walk up to him and jump him ...lol
A. His lips are moving
The simple answer to your dilemma is to not talk, therefore you can't be lied to. Walk up to him and jump him ...lol
Sir Alex 4 U
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ShamelessFlirt said:
Answer to an unkind quote:
How can you tell a woman is lying?
She says size, looks, money are less important than a good personality, honesty and kindness.
Seriously, women need to be more honest about what they really want. Often they say that look, money and status are unimportant when they really mean that those are very important. It's a wonder so many men lie, and all the "nice guys" that women say they want are left alone! I have always been an honest nice guy, and it seems that it's not even close to enough for most women!
Sorry, I am trying not to complain too much! LOL
Sir Alex 4 U
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Zidane said:
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that ALL women are like that, but it "SEEMS" like the one complaining the loudest are!
BTW Did I ever mention how much I love women? All women, even the above mentioned! AND, most guys really want a "BAD" girl anyhow!
Sir Alex 4 U
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Hey ZiDane,
Why do you think the "BAD" is in quotes? LOL That's what we all want. Another bad quote, "A woman in public (lady, sweetheart, etc,) and a slut in bed (sorry, not really a correct word "slut" but close enough!)
Why do you think the "BAD" is in quotes? LOL That's what we all want. Another bad quote, "A woman in public (lady, sweetheart, etc,) and a slut in bed (sorry, not really a correct word "slut" but close enough!)
Sir Alex 4 U
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That's what makes America great! We can disagree amiably! Chalk it up to Left Coast/Right Coast differences! No harm done!
No harm done!
Sir Alex 4 U
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Re: men v women
Absolutely, and age is never a determiner of maturity!
meljr2 said:
Absolutely, and age is never a determiner of maturity!
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Guest
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Right on Sir Alex 4 U. Amen my brother.
NAW!
It’s the chicken and the egg, which came first, the maturity or the success.
I'll bet dollars to donuts right around the time you suddenly became mature and gained self-confidence also just happened to be when you had started earning a decent wage at your job after working there for some time. This also just so happened to be when you had your own place. Quite coincidentally by this time your job relatively safe from a drop-of-the-hat firing, had your own place and been living in it awhile now so you were well adjusted, and by this time had some money saved up.
Well guess what, by the time you have this YOU NO LONGER NEED TO LIE ABOUT IT BECAUSE YOU ACTUALLY DO HAVE ALL THOSE THINGS WOMEN WANT.
So which came first, the success building up your self-esteem to the point you had a high self-worth or you just suddenly maturing out of the blue? My bet is it was the long process that incrementally matured you through experiencing life and not some sudden epiphany that you were some strong sexy adult now.
So the young guys NEED to lie (in many cases) to bed the women because they don't have all that stuff. Insecure? Yes, but they gotta do what they gotta do. I don't do it, but hey, I'm stubborn and honest to a fault. If all that stuff really didn't matter to a woman we would not be tempted to lie about it in the first place.
It’s the chicken and the egg, which came first, the maturity or the success.
I'll bet dollars to donuts right around the time you suddenly became mature and gained self-confidence also just happened to be when you had started earning a decent wage at your job after working there for some time. This also just so happened to be when you had your own place. Quite coincidentally by this time your job relatively safe from a drop-of-the-hat firing, had your own place and been living in it awhile now so you were well adjusted, and by this time had some money saved up.
Well guess what, by the time you have this YOU NO LONGER NEED TO LIE ABOUT IT BECAUSE YOU ACTUALLY DO HAVE ALL THOSE THINGS WOMEN WANT.
So which came first, the success building up your self-esteem to the point you had a high self-worth or you just suddenly maturing out of the blue? My bet is it was the long process that incrementally matured you through experiencing life and not some sudden epiphany that you were some strong sexy adult now.
So the young guys NEED to lie (in many cases) to bed the women because they don't have all that stuff. Insecure? Yes, but they gotta do what they gotta do. I don't do it, but hey, I'm stubborn and honest to a fault. If all that stuff really didn't matter to a woman we would not be tempted to lie about it in the first place.
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Well nice guys dont finish first....
Im one of those "nice guys" and well because i tell the truth, and do nice things for grls, they dont like me as much. THere is less Edge. The saying is true, nice guys do finish last. I have had um 5 g/f in the last oh say 3 mnths...each one broke off cause a) they dint want a relationship or b) they wanted to cheat, and felt bad cause i was too "nice"
Ive tried everything to stay with a grl...yet the only way i have been able to stay was when i wasnt exactly the "nice" bf. When i was more controling and commanding. I have seen many guys like me pass on. Jus cause we aer more timid and nice. I htink women have the need to feel controled by a man. That and they think their BF is stronger because he is the bully, and people fear him. Dunno, this is just my 2 cents. ITs what i have seen throughout the years of my life.
Im one of those "nice guys" and well because i tell the truth, and do nice things for grls, they dont like me as much. THere is less Edge. The saying is true, nice guys do finish last. I have had um 5 g/f in the last oh say 3 mnths...each one broke off cause a) they dint want a relationship or b) they wanted to cheat, and felt bad cause i was too "nice"
Ive tried everything to stay with a grl...yet the only way i have been able to stay was when i wasnt exactly the "nice" bf. When i was more controling and commanding. I have seen many guys like me pass on. Jus cause we aer more timid and nice. I htink women have the need to feel controled by a man. That and they think their BF is stronger because he is the bully, and people fear him. Dunno, this is just my 2 cents. ITs what i have seen throughout the years of my life.
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Guest
Guest
Oh yea... most nice guys are just plain boring too....sheesh, if a guy gave into your every whims and will how interesting would the relationship be? I mean you would get anything without debate....thats little fun. People need to debate with each other. Lifes a struggle, and a BF/GF helps add onto that. TRust me, if ur BF neva lied to you, he would be as boring as watchin a pot boil.
I agree completely with Soupaman's above comments. I mean, I'm about ready to give up and go against everything that I am, everyting that I stood for and become this 'not so nice' guy. Because, I swear, I'm looking for a relationship, not just physical, but ANY type of relationship with a girl other than friendship. Which it always, ALWAYS!!!! comes down to. I'm either a friend, or I'm not, I'm nothing else but. Do I really have to lie about who I really am just to be with someone else? We live in a fucked up society.
SamMalone
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wethorny_angel said:
Hey wethorny..........a better question is, why do women make men lie to them to get them in bed? They hold off till they hear something they want to hear instead of just getting it on!
Just a thought...would like to hear your opinion.
Uh-Huh
Probably, unless you want to date women who are much older than yourself. I am in the same boat as you. By being honest I shoot myself in the foot. I know a couple guys who actually were nice but acted like jerks just to get the women. I remember having a sit-down on the deck attached to my house. One jerk who always had women turned out to be a really nice guy when you sat down and had a beer with him and he freely admitted to acting that way for the benefit of the women who are attracted to it in some sick masochistic way. The other acquaintance there was a nice guy who had tons of female friends but over the course of a year I knew him from work he only had one g/f (who treated him like garbage because he was nice). Our advice, suffice to say, was for him to start acting like a jerk even though he and the other guy dislikes doing so.
In fact on another board a whole thread which received nearly 80 replies was about the same subject as this is. In it a college man confided in us a true story that happened to him recently. He was a nice guy who rooming with a female in a coed dorm. One day a buddy of hers (also female) came back to the apartment late at night and TOLD him that if he ever wants to get women and have sex with him then he should simply lie his ass off and tell them whatever they want to hear. She was being honest with him because she must have liked him and took pity on his loneliness. So there you go, a woman telling a man to lie because it works.
What women say they want and what they really go for are two different things. It's like that car commercial when that woman on the phone is talking about how she is so sick and tired of mach men and how she wants a nice quite sensitive man who enjoys art and classical music and blah, blah, blah. Anyway her blind date comes ripping into the restaurant parking lot in a jaguar at high speed revving the engine and playing loud music. Then she sees him get out of the car and he is the typical arrogant jerk-type and she's all like WOW! I'll call you back, this guy's HOT!
Zidane and me are self-described nice sensitive guys. If that's what women want (an honest man who didn't play games) then how come our PM boxes are not filling up with messages from all the single women here? How come us sensitive guys are not a whole lot more popular around here? Ok, sorry Zidane, maybe I should speak for myself on this one, but I have only gotten one unsolicited PM from the personnel’s since I first came here.
Probably, unless you want to date women who are much older than yourself. I am in the same boat as you. By being honest I shoot myself in the foot. I know a couple guys who actually were nice but acted like jerks just to get the women. I remember having a sit-down on the deck attached to my house. One jerk who always had women turned out to be a really nice guy when you sat down and had a beer with him and he freely admitted to acting that way for the benefit of the women who are attracted to it in some sick masochistic way. The other acquaintance there was a nice guy who had tons of female friends but over the course of a year I knew him from work he only had one g/f (who treated him like garbage because he was nice). Our advice, suffice to say, was for him to start acting like a jerk even though he and the other guy dislikes doing so.
In fact on another board a whole thread which received nearly 80 replies was about the same subject as this is. In it a college man confided in us a true story that happened to him recently. He was a nice guy who rooming with a female in a coed dorm. One day a buddy of hers (also female) came back to the apartment late at night and TOLD him that if he ever wants to get women and have sex with him then he should simply lie his ass off and tell them whatever they want to hear. She was being honest with him because she must have liked him and took pity on his loneliness. So there you go, a woman telling a man to lie because it works.
What women say they want and what they really go for are two different things. It's like that car commercial when that woman on the phone is talking about how she is so sick and tired of mach men and how she wants a nice quite sensitive man who enjoys art and classical music and blah, blah, blah. Anyway her blind date comes ripping into the restaurant parking lot in a jaguar at high speed revving the engine and playing loud music. Then she sees him get out of the car and he is the typical arrogant jerk-type and she's all like WOW! I'll call you back, this guy's HOT!
Zidane and me are self-described nice sensitive guys. If that's what women want (an honest man who didn't play games) then how come our PM boxes are not filling up with messages from all the single women here? How come us sensitive guys are not a whole lot more popular around here? Ok, sorry Zidane, maybe I should speak for myself on this one, but I have only gotten one unsolicited PM from the personnel’s since I first came here.
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IMHO
Women, being more social creature, tend to define men by their labor and were it places them in the social hierarchy of our society. They want to marry "up" in the position relative to where they place themselves on that ladder. That is why I ALMOST NEVER hear about a rich woman or a celebrity marrying some regular non-famous and/or wealthy man. THAT is why we are forced to lie, many see us based on our jobs, they want respect and if they don't respect our employment they don't respect us (and thus we will get no nookie). Who is more shallow now, men or women? The whole "knight in shining armor" has an underlying message of the privilege soon to be gained of joining royalty. They still see things in terms of class (whether subconscious or not I do not know). Women want to be pampered and secure and to “show-off” their husband or boyfriend to make their friends jealous, they can’t do that if he is working at Duncan Donuts or McDonalds or something like that. Therefore, to them, we ARE our jobs. They want money, they want to be spoiled, and they want to be safe and secure. You can’t have those things if you do not have allot of money. Therefor the most common lies men tell are about their jobs and about how much money they make or have.
Women, being more social creature, tend to define men by their labor and were it places them in the social hierarchy of our society. They want to marry "up" in the position relative to where they place themselves on that ladder. That is why I ALMOST NEVER hear about a rich woman or a celebrity marrying some regular non-famous and/or wealthy man. THAT is why we are forced to lie, many see us based on our jobs, they want respect and if they don't respect our employment they don't respect us (and thus we will get no nookie). Who is more shallow now, men or women? The whole "knight in shining armor" has an underlying message of the privilege soon to be gained of joining royalty. They still see things in terms of class (whether subconscious or not I do not know). Women want to be pampered and secure and to “show-off” their husband or boyfriend to make their friends jealous, they can’t do that if he is working at Duncan Donuts or McDonalds or something like that. Therefore, to them, we ARE our jobs. They want money, they want to be spoiled, and they want to be safe and secure. You can’t have those things if you do not have allot of money. Therefor the most common lies men tell are about their jobs and about how much money they make or have.
I will comment on Frimost's post: According to him and I partially agree, we are told and learn as we get older by women, that we need to lie to get a girlfriend or a relationship or sexual encounter. But we are raised up by parents to be nice and courteous to women and not lie to them. So that's two different conflicting philosophies on life. And I'm debating on whether either of them are true or just pure crap.
S
ShamelessFlirt
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Sir Alex 4 U said:
Answer to an unkind quote:
How can you tell a woman is lying?
She says size, looks, money are less important than a good personality, honesty and kindness.
Seriously, women need to be more honest about what they really want. Often they say that look, money and status are unimportant when they really mean that those are very important. It's a wonder so many men lie, and all the "nice guys" that women say they want are left alone! I have always been an honest nice guy, and it seems that it's not even close to enough for most women!
Sorry, I am trying not to complain too much! LOL
Guess what, I'm a guy so I'm qualified to make that joke. And if you took it seriously, I think you missed my point.
I am glad to see this thread..
Thanks, SF, for sharing it with me.
Now here are some juicy comments.
This has turned into a cock holding session to see who has it the worse. Guys, why are you lamenting the fact that you aren't attracting these kinds of girls?? The ones who want money, lies, etc.???
Just like you are offended by the nice guy image, there are also lots of girls offended by that same stigma. " I would take her home to mom, but she isn't fuckable" Someone mentioned that they want a nice girl in public and a slut in the bedroom. Believe it or not, if you treat a girl right, in and out of bed, you will get that!!
Cassidy
Thanks, SF, for sharing it with me.
Now here are some juicy comments.
This has turned into a cock holding session to see who has it the worse. Guys, why are you lamenting the fact that you aren't attracting these kinds of girls?? The ones who want money, lies, etc.???
Just like you are offended by the nice guy image, there are also lots of girls offended by that same stigma. " I would take her home to mom, but she isn't fuckable" Someone mentioned that they want a nice girl in public and a slut in the bedroom. Believe it or not, if you treat a girl right, in and out of bed, you will get that!!
Cassidy
eztouch101
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Honestly?
because we are not confident to tell the truth. Sometimes we get caught up in 15 years of something that we cannot get out of.
So we lie, to avoid conflict.
because we are not confident to tell the truth. Sometimes we get caught up in 15 years of something that we cannot get out of.
So we lie, to avoid conflict.
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Men lie because women LIKE IT!! Simple as that. If they didn't they would not go out with the ones that do. Inside we can ALL tell a lie from the truth..and we all KNOW that good girls LIKE bad boys, and the opposite it also true. Why..simple.."good" is just another way of saying DULL!!(laugh) Sad but TRUE, none the less. I LOVE bad girls, and I always have. That nice girl in public, and a slut in the bedroom..you get over that when you hit thirty. After that, we just want the slut types ALL THE TIME. Why?? They are MORE FUN to be around. NOT just to have sex with, but to hang with, go to movies with, and let other men ogle..and know you are the ONE that is bedding them down. Why do women date the moron jock, instead of bill gates?? No "girlfriend" ever said how hot bill's MIND WAS!!(laugh) Not until they hit mid 30's or so anyway..then like everyone else, it is the intelligence that counts, more than the looks. Because by then women want security in their lives, MORE than they want the good sex..why? They can always LIE, and get some good sex on the side!(laugh) The BIGGEST lie I have heard on here, is all the men that say they ARE HONEST TO A FAULT!!! What a JOKE..if they thought it would get them 30 minutes alone with Brittany Spears, they would lie to their mothers about their fathers having sex with the neighbors kids!!(Laugh) Well..MAYBE not that FAR..but close anyway! And ANY MAN THAT SAYS HE WOULDN'T..list in the above column!(laugh)
