A Place 🤍 for The Girl Next Door ☕️🌷

There are hot guys...chiseled abs, great hair, million dollar smile...

Then there are impressive guys...thought provoking, witty, insightful, attentive. Those are the guys that truly captivate...the ones that steal your thoughts and make you bite your lip...

There are days that I would do terrible things for conversations like that.


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Hope you had a good weekend Stacy! This speaks to me, intelligence and humor are both so important to attraction nothing is sexier than pillow talk 😈
 
Possessiveness. Ugly feeling? Maybe. Sign of love? For some.

Some people simply have possessive personalities. They take ownership of those they care about. Whether it’s related with fear, mistrust, or insecurity - it can become overwhelming.

I believe there are degrees of possession. There’s the two headed jealousy monster that can destroy relationships and friendships. There’s the one eyed egomaniac, who seems to think they are irreplaceable so “Why be worried? You can’t do better than me.”. And there is some kind of middle ground...right? I mean, I haven’t personally seen it, but surely it exists. Where do you fall?


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I guess there's a very fine line between possessive and obsessive? I would think you have to to reach a certain point in a relationship to earn the right to feel possessive. If you just meet someone, and you feel as though you have some sort of right to them, that's off balance to be me. But over time while learning one another, earning each others trust...truly putting in the time, I can understand the feeling of possessive, but it should flow both ways and error on the side of protection versus ownership.
 
I think missing those conversations play a far greater role in facilitating the spiral of a bad relationship deteriorating quicker than any other factor. My experience...what is the first thing that goes? Feeling free to say what you really think. Intimacy. Gone. And then you want me to fuck you? It becomes just a physical act. A using. And not a building...strengthening.

Yes, so much happens in those moments.
 
Hope you had a good weekend Stacy! This speaks to me, intelligence and humor are both so important to attraction nothing is sexier than pillow talk 😈

Some of the best discussions happen on pillows :)

And yes, I did indeed have a nice weekend. Lots of time spent outdoors hiking...maybe I'll share pics next time.


But over time while learning one another, earning each others trust...truly putting in the time, I can understand the feeling of possessive, but it should flow both ways and error on the side of protection versus ownership.

I completely agree. It's uncomfortable for that to be one-side, as with anything in a relationship. I think protection vs. ownership is the perfect description. Most women love the feeling of protection (me included), but a lot don't want to be property (you know, outside of a purely sexual sense ;))

I think missing those conversations play a far greater role in facilitating the spiral of a bad relationship deteriorating quicker than any other factor.

You and me, Dribble, we think a lot alike :) I've walked away from many friendships even for this exact reason. If the intimacy isn't there anymore it just feels like a hole that can't be filled. If I can't be completely open with someone, if I have to put the wall back up after it was torn down, it's not the same.
 
The Bus

It's a rare occasion that a PM will make me stop in my tracks and stare. That happened today. I read a message (a snippet of which is below) and was first amazed, then perplexed, then surpised by the insightfulness.

"...someone tries to respond to one of your posts with the same depth and openness as you...You've opened yourself just enough to give a tantalizing glimpse into what is there, and when a responder tries to meet you, you very quickly close back up...

...But even though there is an appearance of revealing your soul, you are careful to retain most of it hidden from view. Makes me think of a Jerome Bettis stiff-arm..."


I don't normally give too much thought to it, but I admit that I'm a bit of a mess of contradictions. I do want to share, but I often feel like I might overshare so I post and then pull back. And I do wear my heart on my sleeve, but I only let a few touch it, so I guess I am a bit like Bettis protecting the ball (if only I had his adorable smile!).

I appreciate all the posters and lurkers that stop by as I try to engage in a meaningful manner. And thank you for tolerating my aloofness :)

To the Litster who sent me the insightful PM - thank you for giving me food for thought and sharing your other kind words. While I don't want to be compared to a giant running back, unbeknownst to you, Bettis is my favorite football player of all time - so I'll let it slide ;)
 
Some of the best discussions happen on pillows :)

And yes, I did indeed have a nice weekend. Lots of time spent outdoors hiking...maybe I'll share pics next time.

Yes they do! Glad you got out for the weekend. I'm spending a couple of days at a lake, fishing.

Day one down, and I'm still the same lousy fisherman. 😂

But it's beautiful, and quiet, and I wouldn't trade it for the world!
 
Yes they do! Glad you got out for the weekend. I'm spending a couple of days at a lake, fishing.

Day one down, and I'm still the same lousy fisherman. 😂

But it's beautiful, and quiet, and I wouldn't trade it for the world!

I’ve never been fishing... I know, for shame! But a peaceful week in a beautiful place sounds just about perfect right now.
 
I’ve never been fishing... I know, for shame! But a peaceful week in a beautiful place sounds just about perfect right now.
Come on down and we'll suck at fishing together, then! 😂
Truth!
And therein the challenge of people today: how to truly show interest, and be interested by, when the next thing is only a "thumb scroll" away.
 
Come on down and we'll suck at fishing together, then! 😂

Truth!
And therein the challenge of people today: how to truly show interest, and be interested by, when the next thing is only a "thumb scroll" away.

And those boxes can be laid flat if that interest proves to contain respect and trust and not just self serving desire
 
It's a rare occasion that a PM will make me stop in my tracks and stare. That happened today. I read a message (a snippet of which is below) and was first amazed, then perplexed, then surpised by the insightfulness.

"...someone tries to respond to one of your posts with the same depth and openness as you...You've opened yourself just enough to give a tantalizing glimpse into what is there, and when a responder tries to meet you, you very quickly close back up...

...But even though there is an appearance of revealing your soul, you are careful to retain most of it hidden from view. Makes me think of a Jerome Bettis stiff-arm..."


I don't normally give too much thought to it, but I admit that I'm a bit of a mess of contradictions. I do want to share, but I often feel like I might overshare so I post and then pull back. And I do wear my heart on my sleeve, but I only let a few touch it, so I guess I am a bit like Bettis protecting the ball (if only I had his adorable smile!).

I appreciate all the posters and lurkers that stop by as I try to engage in a meaningful manner. And thank you for tolerating my aloofness :)

To the Litster who sent me the insightful PM - thank you for giving me food for thought and sharing your other kind words. While I don't want to be compared to a giant running back, unbeknownst to you, Bettis is my favorite football player of all time - so I'll let it slide ;)

This was very insightful and beautiful. To be open to their critique, if that's even the right word to use. I think it is to be commended in an online format to open yourself up to a group of strangers, in the sense of going out into the world for acceptance of who you are and how you feel. Some might exploit your feelings for their gain, perhaps that's why the apprehension to open up? Having to weed out the bad seeds can be tasking but those who are genuinely drawn to you for whatever their reason, for friendship or more is up to you and they will have to respect what you're willing to share. But to be aware of your actions, sometimes it's hard to see the forest through the trees.


I’ve never been fishing... I know, for shame! But a peaceful week in a beautiful place sounds just about perfect right now.

Shame! j/k - it's quite peaceful though.
 
Come on down and we'll suck at fishing together, then! 😂

Truth!
And therein the challenge of people today: how to truly show interest, and be interested by, when the next thing is only a "thumb scroll" away.

I'm not good at sitting in silence - especially with new people. I'd ask too many probing questions and scare all your fish away :)

You're right - the next thing is just a thumb scroll away. You just have to hope that you captivate enough that they stop scrolling for a bit.

And those boxes can be laid flat if that interest proves to contain respect and trust and not just self serving desire

That's a nice thought... I think one must sit on my box to keep it from bouncing back into shape :) haha

...Having to weed out the bad seeds can be tasking but those who are genuinely drawn to you for whatever their reason, for friendship or more is up to you and they will have to respect what you're willing to share. But to be aware of your actions, sometimes it's hard to see the forest through the trees.

I do sometimes fear that the forest I put up is too thick to see through. But then there are those few persistent and headstrong adventures that seem to make it through and I feel relieved :)
 
I do sometimes fear that the forest I put up is too thick to see through. But then there are those few persistent and headstrong adventures that seem to make it through and I feel relieved :)[/QUOTE]

You feel relieved because you feel comforted by the fact they chose you. To put in the work to get to know you, not just try and use you. I wouldn't dare tell you how you should feel, which I guess i sorta just did (sorry), but I guess I should say I hope you feel flattered by the attention. Hope you are comforted that in this world filled with so many interesting, unique and beautiful people, that somehow through just a small sample of your personality through writing, someone reached out because you made them feel something in world that is very good at making you feel nothing. Or feel pain and sorrow. You somehow bring them joy and a feeling of attraction. That's an amazing thing when you take a step back and look at it like that.
 
I'm not good at sitting in silence - especially with new people. I'd ask too many probing questions and scare all your fish away :)

You're right - the next thing is just a thumb scroll away. You just have to hope that you captivate enough that they stop scrolling for a bit.

Lol! Well I'm terrible at offering up details - unless asked. 😂 And the fish are apparently hiding anyways.
 
You feel relieved because you feel comforted by the fact they chose you. To put in the work to get to know you, not just try and use you. I wouldn't dare tell you how you should feel, which I guess i sorta just did (sorry), but I guess I should say I hope you feel flattered by the attention. Hope you are comforted that in this world filled with so many interesting, unique and beautiful people, that somehow through just a small sample of your personality through writing, someone reached out because you made them feel something in world that is very good at making you feel nothing. Or feel pain and sorrow. You somehow bring them joy and a feeling of attraction. That's an amazing thing when you take a step back and look at it like that.

Way to tell me how to feel...so controlling! ;)
You’re actually pretty spot on, though I don’t often let myself feel flattered. There is nothing that special about me and I’d be a fool to think there aren’t numerous other options. For someone to put effort into scaling my wall, they themselves must be pretty special...and that I appreciate.


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Lol! Well I'm terrible at offering up details - unless asked. 😂 And the fish are apparently hiding anyways.

I’m good at pestering and poking :)
 
Dude....I’m a Texas girl! I know...I make it confusing...but can’t you detect my sweet southern charm? :D
Lmao There is no good way to answer that question. 😜 If I say yes, then I'm an ass for picking the wrong location. If no, then I'm an ass, and probably a bigger one.

It wouldn't be the first time! 😂

How did you end up down south while rooting for northern teams? (Perhaps in a similar way that I did.)
 
Lmao There is no good way to answer that question. 😜 If I say yes, then I'm an ass for picking the wrong location. If no, then I'm an ass, and probably a bigger one.

It wouldn't be the first time! 😂

How did you end up down south while rooting for northern teams? (Perhaps in a similar way that I did.)

I'm just picking on you :)

My dad was from PA so my family bled black and gold my whole life - even if we were the odd balls in a burnt orange town.
 
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