Address catching/getting caught by roommate

[provenredhead]

You know, it sounds like you two are mature enough to handle these situations. You don't have to do anything really to make sure it doesn't get weird. As long as you or her don't think it's weird, it's not weird. I'm sure you both could have assumed prior to this that you both masturbate (at least time to time). So, though it might be a shock walking in on someone in the act, it's not like it's some deep dark secret.

Anyway, if I were you, I wouldn't make too big a deal out of it. If you make a big deal out of it, then it will be weird.

Thanks all for such cool comments!

Yea the only problem is that I'm no longer thinking of here in a friend capacity... well I am, but seeing her play with herself was a turn on to be honest. The thing is that I look at her more and more in that way now.

I mean, yea, we all sometimes check out our friends and think "what if". We're only human after all . But I just don't want that to get in the way.

Oh well, maybe I need to pull a "Something about Mary" and just keep myself satisfied so I don't think about her in that way lol.

 

[provenredhead]

Okay, this is my first post on the boards here, but it's something I can relate to. I've a good friend in my apt complex who I also happen to work with. And we've been hanging out more and more together lately...well, in the course of talking, we both learned we're rather horny people! One thing leads to two and we're making out on the futon, hands roaming everywhere, we nearly have sex...etc. Then another day she spent the night and we kind of went at it early the next morning. And then again she came over one morning and we just kinda snuggled up together and wound up actually having sex. It's like we start getting wound up and all ability to say no falls away.

Anyway, it's leading me to my point (really!)...when we started talking and getting to know one another better, we agreed that things would only get weird if we let them get weird. So even tho she has an eye for a different guy at work (and frankly, I totally have an eye for her!) we just talk about stuff when it happens and it's all good.

Oddly enough, she introduced me to Literotica...I wonder if she's on the boards?

Hot story! Good point! Welcome to the boards

 

[cat_and_bear]

Thanks all for such cool comments!

Yea the only problem is that I'm no longer thinking of here in a friend capacity... well I am, but seeing her play with herself was a turn on to be honest. The thing is that I look at her more and more in that way now.

I mean, yea, we all sometimes check out our friends and think "what if". We're only human after all . But I just don't want that to get in the way.

Oh well, maybe I need to pull a "Something about Mary" and just keep myself satisfied so I don't think about her in that way lol.

You should just let here know that her little show left such an impression.

Maybe next time your watching TV with her and a sexy advert comes on just remark: "you know since your little show nothing else has seemed quite so sexy as it would have before".

Deliver it all cheeky like and it should allow you guys to put the tension behind you.... or it might lead to more (queue 70's funk music).

You have to do something though, otherwise what your feeling now will start making things weird and that can damage the friendship.

 

[provenredhead]

You should just let here know that her little show left such an impression.

Maybe next time your watching TV with her and a sexy advert comes on just remark: "you know since your little show nothing else has seemed quite so sexy as it would have before".

Deliver it all cheeky like and it should allow you guys to put the tension behind you.... or it might lead to more (queue 70's funk music).

You have to do something though, otherwise what your feeling now will start making things weird and that can damage the friendship.

Well so a funny thing happened last night. She walked out of the shower in her towel, looked at me, and then flashed me. Then she went into her room and said "Well now I just gave you another show".

Anyway she came out of her room (dressed this time) and she sat down next to me. Well anyway she said that she needed to break the ice and how we should chat about all that happened.

Well we pretty much agreed:
1. We both do it... everyone does lol.
2. We'll try to not catch each other but acknowledge that we do live in the same place so sometimes you learn and see more than you were expecting.
3. We both need to get laid (up until a few weeks ago I was seeing a friend of hers but it was more casual... she set it up anyways).
4. We probably shouldn't do number 3 together Sorry guys and gals, not hot stories coming out of this one.
5. Unless we pull a number 2 then we can do number 3 together and blame it on stupidity in the moment thereby forgetting number 4
6. Number 5 was a joke. We agree that as fun as it may be, sex would probably screw things up. Especially if one of us brings someone else home.
7. It was kinda fun catching each other. No denying that.

So it was all put out on the table. Big weight of each others shoulders.

I thank you all for being really cool on this thread!

 

[HornyWithBooks]

Niiiice! And cheers on the welcome, Red!

 

[StrapFantasy]

Maybe I missed something. If the two of you agreed that you wouldn't actively try to "catch" each other, that mutual wasn't on the menu, and outright sex is out of the question... why on earth would she flash you to break the ice? Seems to me just a little counterproductive to start discussing avoidance of sexual tensions by creating some... or maybe I missed something...

 

[provenredhead]

Maybe I missed something. If the two of you agreed that you wouldn't actively try to "catch" each other, that mutual wasn't on the menu, and outright sex is out of the question... why on earth would she flash you to break the ice? Seems to me just a little counterproductive to start discussing avoidance of sexual tensions by creating some... or maybe I missed something...

I guess that you have to know her. Really she is pretty open about quite a bit. I mean she has flashed her boobs more than once when I've been around her at parties.

But it's hard to describe her unless you know her face to face. It also doesn't help that I distilled like a 2 hour conversation into 7 points

There was a lot of joking and laughing when we chatted. I mean I acknowledged that it was a turn on catching her and we both laughed about the whole thing. So I mean things were put on the table and that's the important thing.

Why she flashed me as a way to break the ice... I don't know... probably because she thought it was funny and to force the issue.

 

[idareya]

she purposefully flashes her breasts at you...

she "accidentally " got caught by you finger banging herself out in the open...

dude - you think she MAY want you to make a move?

 

[VFaulkon]

I like the way you're handling this, redhead (pun not intended). I agree with supremeshadow on this one; sure it's initially an awkward situation, but you're both adults, and you're right in that life is no porno. It's not even a romantic comedy.

The fact that you both sat down and laid some ground rules down is probably the best thing to do if you don't want to pursue anything with her. As for being turned out...well, duh! If I walked in on a hot, non-blood-related adult woman masturbating on my couch, I'd probably go tripod too! But that's just the physical reaction.

Probably the best friend I have is a girl, and I've fantasized about her myself. It's a 0% chance of actually happening (she's got a bf already, plus I'd like to keep her as just a friend), but the thoughts are still there. It doesn't really mean anything.

I don't really have any new advice, as you seem to be doing a good job on your own (pun not intended again...man, it's hard to avoid masturbatory allegories, ain't it?). Just keep your brain out of your pants and you'll do fine.

 

[revchev]

I guess that you have to know her. Really she is pretty open about quite a bit. I mean she has flashed her boobs more than once when I've been around her at parties.

But it's hard to describe her unless you know her face to face. It also doesn't help that I distilled like a 2 hour conversation into 7 points

There was a lot of joking and laughing when we chatted. I mean I acknowledged that it was a turn on catching her and we both laughed about the whole thing. So I mean things were put on the table and that's the important thing.

Why she flashed me as a way to break the ice... I don't know... probably because she thought it was funny and to force the issue.

Sorry if I've missed this, but do YOU want anything to happen with her? It sounds like you two are handling this very well, but at the same time are one, or both, of you talking yourselves into a false reality? Not to get into a "When Harry Met Sally" debate here, but heterosexual M/F relationships often have an undercurrent of sexual desire to them. Sometimes it's good to steer clear of it, other times you do each other a disservice by denying the feelings that are out there.

On another topic, sounds like you have some primo masturbatory fodder for the foreseeable future

 

[StrapFantasy]

You know her, so I'll have to go with that. It kind of seems like the actions aren't matching the words, is all.

I'll be the first to say that a genuine friendship is indeed a special thing. It isn't something one should be willing to trade for anything because real friends are so rare. From that standpoint, I think you are looking at this in the right way. But I also get the impression there's more going on behind the scenes than it appears. Maybe in ways the two of you aren't noticing either.

I guess that you have to know her. Really she is pretty open about quite a bit. I mean she has flashed her boobs more than once when I've been around her at parties.

But it's hard to describe her unless you know her face to face. It also doesn't help that I distilled like a 2 hour conversation into 7 points

There was a lot of joking and laughing when we chatted. I mean I acknowledged that it was a turn on catching her and we both laughed about the whole thing. So I mean things were put on the table and that's the important thing.

Why she flashed me as a way to break the ice... I don't know... probably because she thought it was funny and to force the issue.

 

[provenredhead]

So a follow up...

Well I have been somewhat MIA from Lit the past few weeks mainly because I have been out of town on business.

Well I actually needed help one of the weekends I was out of town so I asked my roommate to come along. No, I didn't make the "whoops only booked one hotel room" mistake But we did get nice and drunk one night. Drunk enough to end up getting naked for each other.

Yes... we got buck naked. Well there was a little bit of kissing involved. Some fun (no nothing too explicit) that was no strings attached. And we left it at that.

Until last night.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, we made it somewhat explicit. Oral sex explicit.

We were sober.

It was fun.

I think that we had felt this giant bit of sexual tension and decided to risk it all. Where this is going to go? I have no idea. All I can say is the cat is out of the bag. We both agree that it's not exclusive. Thats why we didn't go any further than the oral.

But really it was quite nice waking up with her right there next to me. We are still going to spend the night in our separate rooms to see where things go.

Who knows...

 

[rthnck]

The only way it could have continued.

I would have been disappointed if the entire scenario didn't head in this direction. Good luck. Intimacy and living together without exclusivity is a tricky situation.

 

[StrapFantasy]

Thanks for the update. I was wondering which way things went for you.

I thought there might be something more to the sexual tension you were describing. As others have mentioned, it could be a bit tricky going forward from here but if your posts here are any indication, you're both mature enough to get through it.

I hope it all works out for you both.

 

[NightL]

I think that we had felt this giant bit of sexual tension and decided to risk it all. Where this is going to go? I have no idea.

haha... for me it started a nine year relationship...

 

[thebarber69]

Hmmm...now what would a perverted mind like mine have to say, if you get caught again, and she does it again for you, than instead of just jumpin bones, try a mutual masterbation thing, she does herself, and you do you. At least you both have something to look at, and nothing can get out of that by doing something other than that.

 

[subwannabe]

Sorry I didn't read this sooner. Very hot thread! Can't say much that hasn't been said already but it sounds to me like you have found something special here. Assuming that you don't eventually wind up together in an exclusive relationship, you at least can help each other get rid of some sexual tension or frustration. Seems to me it would be hot just to watch each other masturbate from time to time, as well as whatever else you felt like doing while preserving your "innocence" at the same time. Wasn't it Bill Clinton who said, " I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH THAT WOMAN!". I sometimes daydream about him saying that and then leaning over to one of his aides, asking them what the definition of sex is. Bill's eyes get really big and bulgy while he says back to his aide, "Really?"

 

[thebarber69]

Hmm...and I wonder why my post got there...didn't see that there was the oral fun, hmmm...I wonder if the mind or the lit gods are acting up, well good luck on that. At least you got your knob polished...and if it just stays that way you will be ok, it's the buddy fuck thing, but you never know, it just might be what you both want. Keep it up (that's not a pun) and see what happens.

 

[provenredhead]

One last update and see ya!

So one last update for me here...

Well the other night my roommate came home and knocked on the door to my office. She was out on a date (since we decided thing were not exclusive) and just got home.

The first thing she did when I came out of my office is kiss me. She kissed me pretty hard. Well needless to say one thing led to another and, well, use your imagination.

So we have made things official. We are exclusive to each other. Yea, I know some people on here have relationships that are serious yet open but I'm not like that and neither is she. We want to devote our energy to each other and no one else. Call me old fashioned

But we have decided that something has been going on for some time. We just didn't notice it. I guess all of our friends did since there wasn't really any surprise when we told them.

We have known each other for a very long time and pretty much are best friends. Therefore I don't want to mess anything up.

So... for me it only feels right to say good bye to Lit. You guys and gals have been really cool but for me, hanging out here, really does not allow me to be devoted to my new girlfriend. Again, call me old fashioned

So it's been fun and good luck to you all! A new path awaits me!

 

[MountainMan24]

A thousand congratulations.

Lucky bastard.

 

[StrapFantasy]

Yep! Congrats to you both. I hope it turns out better than you ever could have dreamed.

Sorry to see you leave Lit, however. It's ok to be old fashioned, but why not invite her to join you here so you don't have to go?

 

[801]

provenredhead, this is my very first post. quite possibly my last post. but i just wanted to say that when i read about your business trip, i raised my fists in celebratory triumph for you

but more importantly... you've been friends with her for a long time and you didn't want to ruin that friendship with her. you sound like a nice guy with good values. just know this: best friends make the best lovers. what better to be in a committed relationship with someone whom you fully trust and have a solid foundation with? i have no doubt you two will be happy for a very long time.

all the best
-801

 

[Climaxamus]

Your a guy dude. Make sure she knows that. Thats just whats happens sometime with rommates.

 

[Jaydoes]

ok ok...

Are you guys kidding? The girl wants you? Maybe not for a boyfriend but she's certainly thinking of a friend with benefits kind of thing...let her catch you again and this time don't stop....

 

[SkateBoardDude]

the hell with it, if she is hot, let it get weird! Sounds to me like that is where she wants to go with it.