Any questions to ask a simple man?

[PerceivedAsReal]

BlueElf,

When it comes to spiritual matters, in what one area do you feel you could improve most?

 

[BlueElf]

Spirituality

Great question, perceived! I think that there will always be something to learn about God and life. Personally for me I feel like I need to work more on meditation and listening. I really admire the Eastern traditions of clearing your mind and being open to the flow of the spirit and it's something I would like to explore.

I tend to get very busy and keep so throughout the day and it would be nice to clear the clutter of media, work, and yes even Literotica out of my mind. I think it brings a peace to the soul and starts to work on harmonizing our mind, body, and heart.

BlueElf

p.s. oh, and the kama sutra any takers?

 

[PerceivedAsReal]

WRONG!

...just kidding...

It's definitely important to find time to get in touch with yourself (as opposed to *achem* touching yourself) so that you know what areas within yourself feel "clean" as opposed to "cluttered."

I'm glad you gave that answer, too, because I think I could probably use some slow time for myself on a daily basis. Process the important input that came in and let the rest go, wisps on the wind.

 

[BlueElf]

My pleasure *smiles*

As I said at the beginning of this thread, I am open to any question - from the metaphysical to the purely physical lol.

Now I'm off to get "in touch" with myself lolol

BlueElf
Read my new story at http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=98445

 

[Mr.G]

CAN I PLAY TOO ??

Let f(x) be a function defined on the positive integers such that:

f(x) = x/2 if x is even
f(x) = (3*x+1)/2 if x is odd

Then the conjecture is: iterates of f(x) will eventually reach 1 for any initial value of x.

PROVE THIS CONJECTURE.

 

[BlueElf]

Welcome, Mr. G!

I would prove your conjecture, but I prefer to keep my fucktioning...erm i mean functioning....private

BlueElf

 

[y=mx+b]

Mr. G

I have a couple questions:

What was the longest duration you have spent masturbating to internet porn?

and:

Have you ever suffered from post masturbatory blues?

 

[Wantonica]

Let f(x) be a function defined on the positive integers such that:

f(x) = x/2 if x is even
f(x) = (3*x+1)/2 if x is odd

Then the conjecture is: iterates of f(x) will eventually reach 1 for any initial value of x.

PROVE THIS CONJECTURE.

Mr. G,

I actually took time out of my work day to ponder this. Then, I realized several things. I've been out of school way too long ... chemicals of one sort or another have affected my brain ... the teacher always did say that giving the answer which popped in my head and was right wasn't good enough, I had to SHOW my work. Thanks for making me feel old and simple. In addition, I will figure this out and IM you at some point.

Smiles,
Wantonica (the honor student who forgot to keep her legs closed, thus had premature children ... they weren't, but they were for me) Aced the GED 12 years later though My son had the same problem ... won math awards, but only if he didn't have to show his work. Darn genetics.

 

[jeutsler]

I have a "simple" question, my simple man. How do I entice my man into letting me watch him...stimulate himself? He's not shy anywhere else, but he's Mr. "I don't jack off" and he jumps to shut off the moniter if I wander in while he's surfing naked nymphes. Any suggestions? Jennifer (je)

 

[BlueElf]

Math is cool!

Welcome, y=mx+b! I used to teach math so it's nice to be surrounded by all these integers! lol

As an honest answer, I would have to say that I have masturbated to the internet (mix of stories, pics, posts and occasional chats) at the max for around six hours. A lot of time I know but even as a kid I would play with myself for hours before letting myself orgasm.

And YES, I definitely get the post-masturbatory blues on occasion as well. When I was younger and that being sexual was a "sin", my blues focussed on the guilt of feeling that pleasure and not restraining from touching myself.

Now, though, the blues are a result of wishing that it could have been some witty, lovely gal to mutually masturbate with...among other things I think that's the difficult part of masturbation personally. It's great as a way to be sexual but in the end can often be a rather lonely experience.

BlueElf

Mr. G

I have a couple questions:

What was the longest duration you have spent masturbating to internet porn?

and:

Have you ever suffered from post masturbatory blues?

 

[BlueElf]

Intriguing!

Hi, Jennifer and thanks for posting!

I'm wondering what the reasons are behind his denial of masturbation. Does he feel guilty like he is depriving you of pleasure if he jacks off, or maybe feel like in an odd way he's "cheating" on you? Does he feel like this is unmanly behavior that he doesn't want anyone to know about? Does he not want to make you feel bad by admitting that he likes to look at other women?

If you haven't broached the topic, I'm wondering what he would say if you were to...

1) Talk openly with him about your masturbation experiences and how pleasurable it feels.

2) Tell him in a very husky tone (okay, that's my preference hee hee hee) how turned on it gets you just THINKING of him jacking off.

3) Offer to jack him off a bit after he gets started. Like "five minutes where I can watch, five minutes where I get to play!"

4) Express how manly you think it is that he's comfortable with being sexual, whether or not you are around.

5) Offer to masturbate for him as part of a strip show...if he will return the favor.

6) Tell him it would help you to please him sexually to know how he masturbates and what gets him going. What kind of pics or thoughts? What kind of strokes? (best to save this suggestion for later when you think he's a bit more comfortable with talking about the subject).

Let me know what happens and I wish you well!

BlueElf, who was very glad as a kid to read Judy Blume's opinions about how masturbation was a normal thing

p.s. Hmmm...looks like now I have to compete with wantonica for an answer to Mr. G's question. Looks like tongue in cheek won't cut it! *wonders if tongue in anywhere else will *

I have a "simple" question, my simple man. How do I entice my man into letting me watch him...stimulate himself? He's not shy anywhere else, but he's Mr. "I don't jack off" and he jumps to shut off the moniter if I wander in while he's surfing naked nymphes. Any suggestions? Jennifer (je)

 

[jeutsler]

Mmm, mmm, mmm...you've given me some, um, food for thought. Thank you kindly for the thoughtful consideration of my dilemma (ok, maybe dilemma is a bit strong!).
Let's see...off the top I'll say that it's not number 1 as I've tried that. (though I'll admit it's not easy to be open and forthright about the topic when he's not giving me any clues if he's turned on, grossed out, embarrassed or disinterested!)
Number 2 I've done on many occasions. So far my sighing lustful longings are met with dead air. (must admit that's why I love him-he still manages to keep me guessing sometimes!).
Number 3...hmmm. Dare I go give that one a shot right now? What if he says no? Or God forbid LAUGHS at the idea?! Must think on that one a bit.
4 might just be the ticket (the man is a Leo).
5-maybe further on down the road.
6 is just another night of number 2 around here. One day I hope to get an answer.

OK, sir, that leaves three and four. Guess I'll be giving them a shot now. Wish me lick...luck...whatever! Thanks ever so. (so much for a "simple" man. I knew it was an oxymoron~jennifer (je)

 

[BlueElf]

My pleasure, Jen

And hopefully yours and his, too!

BlueElf

 

[Wantonica]

p.s. Hmmm...looks like now I have to compete with wantonica for an answer to Mr. G's question. Looks like tongue in cheek won't cut it! *wonders if tongue in anywhere else will *

No competition, I gave up. I'm hoping Mr. G satisfies me and gives me the proof himself. Then I can study it and learn something (again). I simply haven't the time. My days are spent figuring angles, fractions, square inches, feet, yards, widths and lengths. I do it all the hard way; answers pop into my head and I have to assure myself it is true...

Smiles,
Wantonica

P.S. Watch that tongue.

 

[BlueDaisy]

Re: Math is cool!

Welcome, y=mx+b! I used to teach math so it's nice to be surrounded by all these integers! lol

A math teacher! Eek! *holding up a silver bullet and a string of garlic and some sunshine*

You never mentioned that in our chats! lol Of course, not that the subject of math ever came up *grin*

I flunked math almost all the time. I don't know how I ever graduated from high school. In high school I took Fundamentals of Math and Introductory Algebra and "passed" with a D- in both. I was never so happy to be finished with a course in my whole school life as when I completed IA and didn't have to take math any more in high school.

I just never did "get" math at all. History, English, Speech (hehehe), Homemaking...those were my subjects. But math and science...*shudder*

No question for you this time; I'll have to think of one. Right now thinking back to math classes of old has taxed my brain....

 

[BlueElf]

Re: CAN I PLAY TOO ??

Let f(x) be a function defined on the positive integers such that:

f(x) = x/2 if x is even
f(x) = (3*x+1)/2 if x is odd

Then the conjecture is: iterates of f(x) will eventually reach 1 for any initial value of x.

PROVE THIS CONJECTURE.

Wantonica, have no fear! I'm afraid our math skills will never be able to find the answer to this conundrum. I quote from the Mathematics Archives:

"I've been working on a problem in Number Theory off and on for almost ten years called "the Collatz Conjecture" aka "the 3X + 1 problem". Let f(x) be a function defined on the positive integers such that:

f(x) = x/2 if x is even
f(x) = (3*x+1)/2 if x is odd

Then the conjecture is: iterates of f(x) will eventually reach 1 for any initial value of x. Various cash prizes have been offered for the proof or disproof of this conjecture."

WOW!!! Cash prizes?

Anyone else have any questions?

BlueElf, who always watches his tongue - it's the only way to assure quality services!

 

[Wantonica]

Very, very interesting indeed. Almost as interesting as the 70-year-old woman I had coffee with this morning asking me to explain "doggy style". LMAO...

Smiles,
Wantonica

 

[BlueElf]

Doggy style?

Very, very interesting indeed. Almost as interesting as the 70-year-old woman I had coffee with this morning asking me to explain "doggy style". LMAO...

Smiles,
Wantonica

Well when a bull and a bitch love each other very much.....lol

BlueElf

 

[BlueElf]

Good Saturday morning!

The Question shop is open for business!

BlueElf

 

[BlueDaisy]

Re: Good Saturday morning!

The Question shop is open for business!

BlueElf

Anyone that chipper at 0800 on a Saturday should be shot! Even elves.

lol....j/k. Mornin' sweetie. How ya be? No questions right now...the brain is still asleep (no coffee yet; hurry up, coffeepot!)

 

[BlueElf]

Blech! Coffee?

Hurry up and catch up - the morning is fading fast! lol

BlueElf

 

[BlueDaisy]

Re: Blech! Coffee?

Hurry up and catch up - the morning is fading fast! lol

BlueElf

Grrr...grumble...$#^&&$&*#$*(^$

Got to much to do today. grumble...

 

[SlickTony]

I tend to avoid men who describe themselves as simple. They're the ones who complicate your life the worst.

 

[BlueElf]

I tend to avoid men who describe themselves as simple. They're the ones who complicate your life the worst.

Hmm...good point! Maybe I should have dropped the adjective But then again, I'm not sure I should listen to someone named slick j/k (love your stories!)

BlueElf

 

[BlueDaisy]

Hmm...good point! Maybe I should have dropped the adjective But then again, I'm not sure I should listen to someone named slick
BlueElf

Good reply, Elfman...