Anyone else get tired of having the same gender all the time?

[Stella_Omega]

...the greater tendency of women holding a grudge for rediculously long periods of time...

Hahah, what did you do...

 

[infinity706]

Hahah, what did you do...

I haven't personally been the recipient of any grudge holding. I'm usually the mediator. I just end up in fights on the internet because people assume I'm way more hostile than I really am. In reality, I have a bunch of big sisters that go chew someone's ass because they're worried about me being too nice and getting pushed around. I am the smartass that would shoot people in the butt with a rubber band, say "Not here" when my name comes up during roll call or stare blankly at people that yell at me, though.

I'm also, generally considered a virgin by groups of people that don't know me, which has led to people attempting to set me up with inexperienced virgins. That's led to some OMGWTF moments. It's not like I lie about my experience. I just don't hit on people unless I've already flirted heavily with them or had sex with them in the past. That doesn't mean I won't shove anyone against the wall and forcefully french them once the action starts, though. Of course, I do bluntly hit on people on the internet since I can't do any of my normal things.

 

[CandiCame]

But do you like it? People being confused about your gender, that is?

Actually, sometimes I do. There are a few social perks that women get that men don't- even my face is kind of feminine- in fact, my man said that's one of the things that he likes about me. I shave every day but I don't even really need to- I don't somuch as grow facial hair- if I wanted it, I could maybe do a fumanchu or a douche-bag line beard, but as for a full beard or even a decent goatee, it's not gonna happen.

And I inadvertently dress in drag a lot, just because I like my clothes to be tight to my skin, and I tend to like women's shirts better, because they're tighter, so I can see it. But it's not that I'm in drag- I mean, sometimes I'll do full drag, but I do tend to wear guy's pants and girl's shirts a lot- I've got the long hair, and the estrogen features-

So I don't pay full price for food- or anything really, I get doors opened for me and whatnot- and guys pay for my shit on dates- well, at least Bill does, so I do actually like it. I also just kinda like the confusion it causes- I like being androgynous, though it does get annoying sometimes to...

I dunno, it is what it is. But I like androgyny on me. Manly man works on some guys, but it's just not me- I like variety, I think we all work best when we know who we are and act on it.

*shrugs*

 

[CandiCame]

From what I've been told by women that like both, it's not really that different. The actual vaginal canal can't feel anything (the rectum is has no feeling either) and you can hit the prostate/G-spot anally. The only obvious differences are the tightness of the anal sphincter and the fact that you have to use artificial lube.

Oral sex shouldn't feel too much different other than the fact that the clitoris is a lot smaller, so you can't really suck on most of them. The penis/clitoris and vulva/scrotum develop from the same embryonic tissues and they make artificial lube. (that's why guys have that seam called a perineal raphe behind their balls) The only parts that disentigrate are the reproductive ones that don't have any sensation, anyway.

Yeah- but I'd love to be able to try dp- hit the prostate from both sides at once- that sounds fucking amazing!

Do chicks have prostates?
If not I could re-write that sentence with the Graffenburg muscle.

 

[infinity706]

Yeah- but I'd love to be able to try dp- hit the prostate from both sides at once- that sounds fucking amazing!

Do chicks have prostates?
If not I could re-write that sentence with the Graffenburg muscle.

Women do have a gland called the paraurethral gland or female prostate. It comes from the same tissue, but it's generally smaller and structured a bit differently. You also can't hit it from both sides. The prostate is wrapped around the urethra, afterall, and women's piss holes are in front of the vagina. The vaginal/anal wall is very thin, though. If you put a speculum in, you can easily see the imprint from poking around in the other hole.

As for the paying full price for food, getting bought things, and all that, though, women are doing that quite a bit more, nowdays, too. As you go down the age ladder, it seems women get more and more likely to chase the guy. If you have a reputation for being NSA and a talented lover, though, you can really rack up some free shit. Of course, that doesn't mean the fuck them and forget them type. A desirable candidate would be her friend and fill her on an as needed basis.

 

[CandiCame]

Women do have a gland called the paraurethral gland or female prostate. It comes from the same tissue, but it's generally smaller and structured a bit differently. You also can't hit it from both sides. The prostate is wrapped around the urethra, afterall, and women's piss holes are in front of the vagina. The vaginal/anal wall is very thin, though. If you put a speculum in, you can easily see the imprint from poking around in the other hole.

As for the paying full price for food, getting bought things, and all that, though, women are doing that quite a bit more, nowdays, too. As you go down the age ladder, it seems women get more and more likely to chase the guy. If you have a reputation for being NSA and a talented lover, though, you can really rack up some free shit. Of course, that doesn't mean the fuck them and forget them type. A desirable candidate would be her friend and fill her on an as needed basis.

See, my man really wants to do dp now w/him & a vibe & I REALLY don't want to stretch, so we haven't because I'm a whiney bitch about it. But I would love to be able to do vaginal/anal. If the wall's that thin, aren't you ladies afraid of tearing them, though?!? That sounds scarey...

 

[LucyH]

I still think I'd make a very unattractive woman, but... hmmm....

You never know for sure until you really try, I guess. And I suppose that applies to me as much as it does to you.

There are a few social perks that women get that men don't

I agree with that, though the main perk I'm interested in is having more latitude in terms of what's socially acceptable behavior for me. There aren't really a lot of activities that'll get a girl teased just because she's a girl doing something that's more often a guy thing, for instance. So for someone with an androgynous personality, I think it's easier to just be yourself and get left alone about it if you happen to be female, or perceived as such. (If you're stuck with the same gender all the time, that is.) I'm just greedy - I want even more freedom.

And I inadvertently dress in drag a lot, just because I like my clothes to be tight to my skin, and I tend to like women's shirts better, because they're tighter, so I can see it. But it's not that I'm in drag- I mean, sometimes I'll do full drag, but I do tend to wear guy's pants and girl's shirts a lot- I've got the long hair, and the estrogen features.

Sounds like a nice look. I do the opposite: women's pants (because they fit my hips correctly) and men's shirts a lot of the time, because if I wear something loose and the fabric isn't too lightweight, I can get away without a bra without being conspicuous about it. Bras make my back itch. Hate it.

 

[LucyH]

See, my man really wants to do dp now w/him & a vibe

Why? (This is not a rhetorical question.)

 

[Stella_Omega]

Why? (This is not a rhetorical question.)

Because Bill thinks that the vibe going in alongside his dick would feel amazing.

And dudes...yanno, they think of something and then they have to do it.

"Hold my beer and watch this."

 

[LucyH]

As for the paying full price for food, getting bought things, and all that, though, women are doing that quite a bit more, nowdays, too. As you go down the age ladder, it seems women get more and more likely to chase the guy.

And the guys seem to like it, regardless of age. Except for the one date who got discombobulated and anxious when he showed up at the coffee shop and I'd already bought my own cappuccino.

 

[LucyH]

Because Bill thinks that the vibe going in alongside his dick would feel amazing.

I guess where I get lost is that if it's vibration that makes it interesting, why would it have to be a conventional phallic sort of toy that'd make a person worry about stretching? Why not one of those tiny ones on a cord? (eg. silver bullet.) It could just go inside and stay there. So I was thinking maybe it's more than that/something else/I'm wrong about the logistics because it never occurred to me to try this when I had one of those. Maybe I'm over-thinking.

And dudes...yanno, they think of something and then they have to do it.

Well, yes, it's not just dudes who get like that. That part I understand.

 

[twister947]

Easily the most interesting thread I've read in a very long time...thanks to all.

 

[none2_none2]

I remember being in some kind of touch feely class of some type (maybe drama) where students were supposed to pretend to be something other than they were -- a different race, a different religion, a different height, a different weight, a different gender. You wouldn't believe the resistance from guys there was for imagening a different gender. To do so was some how a betrayal at some base level that some guys could not do.

Personally, if somebody said I could be a biological parent if i switched genders, I would go for it. However, that comes from the wish to be a biological parent -- not from some gender switching desire.

However, in general I couldn't see myself as a woman. I cannot imagine running with large breasts, and I have heard stories of women having back pains from them.

I also could not imagine what it must be like to have cycles every month for a good part of your life. Is it like having diarrhea where you just cannot do something because you have to stop what you are doing so that you can take care of "businenss? I have heard that culturally, the female experience can give a woman a more realistic perspective about life. Guys can skirt issues of reproduction, birth, death; we can ignore it all. Whereas a woman is constantly reminded that she is part of the cycle of life. It sounds intellectually/spiritually superior to be pulled back into some reality, but still sounds like a nuance to have to deal with cycles.

I also could not imagine having less upper body strength. I am kind of shy about asking for help. I would feel weak, or less useful if I had to ask for help from a man to move something. As man, I do love to help others -- (as long as I'm not in one of those urban, self-absorbed, high paced moods, where I don't want to be bothered.)

The idea of bringing in life into the world (female or an involved male siring), sounds beautiful to me even if it isn't politically correct to say so. Working with animals, I have seen so much what I would call love from a mother animal to its offspring. If I was somehow reincarnated into an animal, I would defintely want to be a female. Female animals tend to think of their offspring in someways more than themselves. They sometimes band together in female groups (typically sororal groupings or generational female groups.) I like that kind of "connection" with others. I try not to be sexists, but I do tend to "like" females more than males. Any individual is capable of great cruelty or what some would call evil, yet men seem to have less control holding back their negative energies. More killings, more crime, more cheating, more just bout anything negative happens more in the male world.

I also never understood the big need for lubes, gels, perfumes, shavings, grooming, jewelry. Go into clothing stores, cosmetic sections of stores, and it is amazing how much stuff there are for women to take care of on a daily basis. A guy showers, shaves (optionally), uses deodorant, may have nasal or ear hairs to take care of (optionally), and that is that. Younger generation of men s stare in the mirror longer, but still the tasks to take care of are so much smaller than many women's daily ritual.


Sometimes I think being a male and being attractacted to males was my lot in life in some cosmic commanded way. It forces me to love men, because without that strong physical and emotional "need" to be loved by a man and to be inside a man, I probably would have avoided them except when I wanted to learn something from then. Sometimes I feel like there are plenty of woman that I "get". I seldom feel that way with men, thus the masculine mystique.

I would also say that I don't buy into this idea that men don't hold grudges. Think of the Hatfield & McCoys who feuded for generations. I myself hated my dad for about 35 years. He hated his dad for many years. I do think that some men don't keep grudges, not because they have better hormone control, or more friendly, but because of an easy ability to be indifferent to others and life.

Again, these are all stereotypes that each of us deal with from our life experiences. I try my best to judge the individual, but it is easy to slip into stereotypes from one's own experiences.

 

[LucyH]

I would feel weak, or less useful if I had to ask for help from a man to move something.

Yeah, I know what you mean. It's always been the jars and bottle caps that defeated me. But would guys feel inferior if they need to ask a woman for physical help with something because she's smaller? What if you had to ask her to manipulate an object you couldn't reach because your hands/fingers/arms were too big? I think that's happened to me about as many times as I've had to go find a guy to open a jar for me.

And surely you must envy my ability to hide in a suitcase. It hasn't proved useful yet, but you never know when it might come in handy.

 

[none2_none2]

I guess I don't always think of male/female in terms of stature/size. I could see where a smaller hand (more likely found on a female or child) would be perfect for someting like getting a ring out of a garbage disposal. My grandma had shorter fingers than I, but she had the ability to stretch. She didn't have a dainty width to her palms. They weren't masculine, just not dainty. So I don't equate it as a gender thing.

Most of the things now, that I would need help with are because I've let myself gain weight. Take out reproduction from the equation, and I think I'd rather be able to be kind of skinny again than worry about what gender I was. My weight is causing health issues now. I've let it get out of control the last 10 or so years. The problem isn't so much exercise, as I just love food. I was skinny up until late 20's, then I thought I had a good solid look, but it was too much in my 40's and now in my 50's. I was never attracted to really skinny guys, but I do wish i was more that way again.

 

[CandiCame]

Because Bill thinks that the vibe going in alongside his dick would feel amazing.

And dudes...yanno, they think of something and then they have to do it.

"Hold my beer and watch this."

That, and he just REALLY wants me to stretch- I have no idea why. I think because he knows that I'm scared of it and just wants something to tease me with because there's so little I won't do. I really don't know why- but we've talked about it, and he says that he just thinks it's sexy to see me completely filled-stretched and crying- that look that I get that's half pain/half pleasure, begging without knowing if it's to stop or go... It's part of the dom thing, which I love about him. That's why I said the only reason we haven't is because I've been a whiney bitch about it.

The first/last time we tried I just couldn't relax enough for it- he was REALLY into it, but no matter how he tried, we just couldn't get it to work, and it had already reduced me to all sniveling, crying, and in pain, so by then we didn't really need it, you know?

See- he loves that shit- yet if I rip he freaks right the fuck out at the site of the blood and starts wanting to take me to the hospital or some shit- like I want to go to the ER and explain that I'm there because we were trying to fit to many things in my ass. I've NEVER gone, and we sometimes get in a fight about it (he could physically carry me to the car, but he hasn't yet), but usually if you take a bath it makes the bleeding stop and I'll fucking heal. I'm not dieing- I just don't like it.

I don't want to stretch- because I want to be tight for him. I don't know why that's so fucking hard to understand. That's another reason I've wanted a pussy before- those CAN stretch and retain their size/shape/tightness. That would be pretty cool...

But I would love to be able to try DP- just not in the same opening... He's right- I do love being filled completely- but he does that on his own- I was an anal virgin before him- he doesn't NEED anything else.

 

[infinity706]

See, my man really wants to do dp now w/him & a vibe & I REALLY don't want to stretch, so we haven't because I'm a whiney bitch about it. But I would love to be able to do vaginal/anal. If the wall's that thin, aren't you ladies afraid of tearing them, though?!? That sounds scarey...

A vagina is designed to deliver a baby. It's very, very tough and incredibly stretchy. It's actually so tough and stretchy that if you cut the vagina out of a woman, you could probably stretch it around a small adult's body while it's still fresh. It's the vulva you have to worry about damaging, not the actual vagina. Of course, the lens of the eye is only a tiny, fraction of an inch thick, yet it's tough to cut, even with a surgical scapel (I actually tried the scapel thing when I was doing a dissection )

And the guys seem to like it, regardless of age. Except for the one date who got discombobulated and anxious when he showed up at the coffee shop and I'd already bought my own cappuccino.

It doesn't just happen with guys. I've had women get upset when they didn't get to treat me.

Yeah, I know what you mean. It's always been the jars and bottle caps that defeated me. But would guys feel inferior if they need to ask a woman for physical help with something because she's smaller? What if you had to ask her to manipulate an object you couldn't reach because your hands/fingers/arms were too big? I think that's happened to me about as many times as I've had to go find a guy to open a jar for me.

And surely you must envy my ability to hide in a suitcase. It hasn't proved useful yet, but you never know when it might come in handy.

It wouldn't bother me. Of course, I've even asked women to open things for me because I wasn't strong enough. Sure, women that are bigger/stronger than me are the very rare exception, but I personally like the idea of a woman that could force herself on me. (sadly, there's been only 4 that were stronger than me)

 

[LucyH]

Thanks, Candi, I get it now. I might not choose that particular way to go about it, but if I could get a reaction like that out of a boyfriend, I'd be pretty much addicted.

I wonder what percentage of adults cry from pain. And is it about pain? I don't remember when I stopped, but a few years ago, I was yelling at doctors to quit doing things that hurt and just let me bleed out - obviously not rational or dealing well, but I'm pretty sure there were no tears. Bring out a sappy, sad movie, though, and I might as well get the box of kleenex before even hitting the play button.

 

[LucyH]

Infinity... are you my lab partner from 6th grade? The one who insisted on digging the eyeballs out of a formaldehyde-soaked fish with a pencil? Oh, wait, that was a girl. Never mind.

It doesn't just happen with guys. I've had women get upset when they didn't get to treat me.

I think it's a silly thing to get upset about, but it's nice to know that it's equal opportunity silliness, I guess.

It wouldn't bother me. Of course, I've even asked women to open things for me because I wasn't strong enough. Sure, women that are bigger/stronger than me are the very rare exception, but I personally like the idea of a woman that could force herself on me. (sadly, there's been only 4 that were stronger than me)

You aren't the first person who's told me this, come to think of it. And female characters who can take just about anything/anyone in a fight are popular in movies, TV, and comics that are intended to appeal to a male audience. Of course, the men in the cast are usually pretty tough themselves.

Now I want to take a poll.

 

[woman_inside]

I would love to be able to be female at will. I'm more or less accepting of my gender but if I had the choice I'd be a bisexual woman who prefers women. Haven't yet been on the receiving end of anal sex (though I'd love to try it) but I would really like to be penetrated, particularly as a female. As far as actually making love to someone goes, though, I can't think of anything more beautiful than girl on girl.

It's way too late for me to consider switching genders; I dont think I'd make a very attractive woman, and my beard probably wouldn't let me pass convincingly in drag Also, it seems like there'd be an awful lot to learn about acting as a woman. Altogether, it's more effort than it's worth.

But if I could do it all with a wave of the hand, I would with no hesitation at all.

me too, except I'd like to be vaginally penetrated by men. wanting to be a woman penetrated by a man has long been a fantasy of mine, but more recently I've fantasized a lot about being a woman and having an ultra-traditional role, with motherhood and so forth.

 

[jackstud]

me too, except I'd like to be vaginally penetrated by men. wanting to be a woman penetrated by a man has long been a fantasy of mine, but more recently I've fantasized a lot about being a woman and having an ultra-traditional role, with motherhood and so forth.

Maybe Breed you with my seed

 

[CandiCame]

Thanks, Candi, I get it now. I might not choose that particular way to go about it, but if I could get a reaction like that out of a boyfriend, I'd be pretty much addicted.

I wonder what percentage of adults cry from pain. And is it about pain? I don't remember when I stopped, but a few years ago, I was yelling at doctors to quit doing things that hurt and just let me bleed out - obviously not rational or dealing well, but I'm pretty sure there were no tears. Bring out a sappy, sad movie, though, and I might as well get the box of kleenex before even hitting the play button.

It's not even somuch that I'm crying from the pain... I honestly don't know how to explain it- it's kind of a sub-space thing... I can take a shit-ton of pain without letting on that I'm hurt- I didn't cry when I was shot and had to get part of my shoulder/back sewn back together. I don't usually cry from pain, I usually get angry from pain.

But this isn't just pain- it's got a psychological aspect that makes me- not just cry, but turn into this sniveling little... thing. It's not the physical pain or even the emotional pain... I don't know what it is. I just know that I like it.

 

[LucyH]

It's not even somuch that I'm crying from the pain... I honestly don't know how to explain it- it's kind of a sub-space thing... I can take a shit-ton of pain without letting on that I'm hurt- I didn't cry when I was shot and had to get part of my shoulder/back sewn back together. I don't usually cry from pain, I usually get angry from pain.

But this isn't just pain- it's got a psychological aspect that makes me- not just cry, but turn into this sniveling little... thing. It's not the physical pain or even the emotional pain... I don't know what it is. I just know that I like it.

I was about to say maybe that never happened to me because I don't let go to that extent, but that isn't always true. I'd just buried those memories pretty deep. Nice to dig them out and dust them off. Good grief, I can't believe I forgot. Once I think it was shock value - somebody had the nerve to punch me, and I was not expecting that. I liked it though.

You have no idea how much this helps with the story I'm writing right now.

Edited to add: AAaah! How do you forget a thing like that? What's wrong with me?

 

[woman_inside]

Maybe Breed you with my seed

I'd love that. Two hot possible scenarios:

-you kidnap me , make me into a woman, use me as your fucktoy, don't care about making me pregnant, or have a fetish for preggers fucktoys.
-i' your wife, and sex and bearing your kids are part of my wifely duties.

 

[CandiCame]

I was about to say maybe that never happened to me because I don't let go to that extent, but that isn't always true. I'd just buried those memories pretty deep. Nice to dig them out and dust them off. Good grief, I can't believe I forgot. Once I think it was shock value - somebody had the nerve to punch me, and I was not expecting that. I liked it though.

You have no idea how much this helps with the story I'm writing right now.

Edited to add: AAaah! How do you forget a thing like that? What's wrong with me?

I've never been punched-punched- he's to scared of actually hurting me- but I would love it- I like coming out of the bedroom covered with bruises, looking like I just lost a fight because, you know, I had. I wish that when he got really pissed he'd just rape the shit out of me instead of arguing; you know, beat the hell out of me- then just take me completely- I told him that once and he got really, really mad- so I dropped it; but that's been kind of a fantasy of mine.