Are you a "performative" writer?

[StillStunned]

I will say as far as hobbies that attract me, being able to draw and/or play music is high on the list.

My ex: "I'm going to play the guitar!"
Me: "Cool. It will be nice background music while I read my book."
My ex: "No! You have to sit there and watch and listen while I play the same songs as I did last week, and the week before, and you're not allowed to speak or move or read or do anything but watch and listen!"
Me: "I look forward to the day when you're my ex."

 

[MelissaBaby]

Shouldn't you check which category before bailing out?

That would more likely make me leave faster...

(By the way you all are getting that it was a self depredating joke, right?)

 

[SavannaT]

I mean i like the idea of turning men and women on with my writing but not with the expectation it would get me laid lol

 

[MelissaBaby]

I will say as far as hobbies that attract me, being able to draw and/or play music is high on the list.

I had a friend who used to let me lay next to him while he practiced guitar and sang, especially if I was stressed out. (Not right next to him, but like, my toes would be under his thighs.) Best sleep I ever got was listening to him play.

And my artist friends, I could watch them draw all day and be in constant awe of their skills.

I get that. I get turned on watching my husband cook.

 

[AwkwardMD]

You all talk to other people?

 

[Erozetta]

You all talk to other people?

Sometimes.

Well... I type at other people. Outside of work I only talk to two people and I'm married to one of them.

 

[MelissaBaby]

My ex: "I'm going to play the guitar!"
Me: "Cool. It will be nice background music while I read my book."
My ex: "No! You have to sit there and watch and listen while I play the same songs as I did last week, and the week before, and you're not allowed to speak or move or read or do anything but watch and listen!"
Me: "I look forward to the day when you're my ex."

Guy comes over to her house. Brings his guitar. After a while, they move into the bedroom. She gets in bed, he sit on the edge and starts strumming.

She taps him on the shoulder, and points to a sign on the wall.

NO STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN

 

[MelissaBaby]

You all talk to other people?

Here's the crazy thing; they pay me to do it.

 

[TheLobster]

Me: "What do you like to do in your free time?"

Him: "I write erotic fiction for Literotica."

Me: "What kind of scores do you get?"

Him: "Usually around three and a half, four stars."

Me: "Oh gee, look at the time. It's been nice meeting you."

Him: "In Loving Wives."

Her: "Oh, silly me! I mixed up the arrows on the clock!"

Him: "..."

Her: "What?"

Him: "I said Loving Wives, not Mind Control bimbofication."

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

You all talk to other people?

People??? As in plural??? There’s more than one??? Oh, the horror.

 

[StillStunned]

People??? As in plural??? There’s more than one??? Oh, the horror.

Most of the ones worth talking to are all here.

 

[CalBishForNow]

Him: "In Loving Wives."

Her: "Oh, silly me! I mixed up the arrows on the clock!"

Him: "..."

Her: "What?"

Him: "I said Loving Wives, not Mind Control bimbofication."

 

[Writer61]

That would more likely make me leave faster...

(By the way you all are getting that it was a self depredating joke, right?)

I did.

 

[Kat90xx]

Maybe in our dirty little community of creatives it’s even more nuanced - which extreme would you find more appealing contacted you?

A. Alphadom3OOO/BimboBunniBoiler- topless pic, 10 spelling mistakes in 20-word bio, sends link to their genitals, hasn’t read your stuff

B. WitheringTights/QuilleakerNE - pic is a cartoon/anime or pet, 10+ 4.9/5 stories of your favourite kink, bio includes a poem or song lyrics, writes detailed feedback on how reading one of your stories awakened something deep within their repressed sexuality/inspired them to reconcile with their father and their tortured past

Surely there’s a Sociology PHD in the wonderful world of Lit!

 

[StillStunned]

"My hobbies? Well, I write fiction..."
[Temperature rises]
"... Erotic fiction..."
[Temperature rises further]
"... About sex-positive people having respectful fun..."
[Temperature soars]
"... In 2P POV."

 

[IWroteThis]

"My hobbies? Well, I write fiction..."
[Temperature rises]
"... Erotic fiction..."
[Temperature rises further]
"... About sex-positive people having respectful fun..."
[Temperature soars]
"... In 2P POV."

View attachment 2593164

You made me snort, and now people are looking at me like I write 2P POV!

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

You made me snort, and now people are looking at me like I write 2P POV!

You love it, the feeling of being exposed, the sense of strangers knowing your true secrets, your inner self. The fact that they saw a piece of your soul excites, entices you.
With a soft moan, you enjoy the feeling of the tingle that runs up your spine, the shudder that brings a smile to your face. Being exposed, metaphorically naked, you laugh at yourself, snorting again as you rub your thighs together and close your eyes, letting your imagination run wild with thoughts of what they would think if they knew the true depths of your depravity; perhaps a chortle, a cackle, maybe even, dare you, a guffaw....

 

[MelissaBaby]

Maybe in our dirty little community of creatives it’s even more nuanced - which extreme would you find more appealing contacted you?

A. Alphadom3OOO/BimboBunniBoiler- topless pic, 10 spelling mistakes in 20-word bio, sends link to their genitals, hasn’t read your stuff

B. WitheringTights/QuilleakerNE - pic is a cartoon/anime or pet, 10+ 4.9/5 stories of your favourite kink, bio includes a poem or song lyrics, writes detailed feedback on how reading one of your stories awakened something deep within their repressed sexuality/inspired them to reconcile with their father and their tortured past

Surely there’s a Sociology PHD in the wonderful world of Lit!

I've only got a Bachelors, so I'll have to get back to you in about ten years.

 

[Kat90xx]

I've only got a Bachelors, so I'll have to get back to you in about ten years.

That’ll be one heck of a data set though!
Oh and I forgot, competition winner? Please leave your clothes at the door

 

[alohadave]

People??? As in plural??? There’s more than one??? Oh, the horror.

I'd say you are all figments of my perverted mind, but I'm not nearly creative enough to come up with some of the things you people say.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

I'd say you are all figments of my perverted mind, but I'm not nearly creative enough to come up with some of the things you people say.

We are all but ghosts in the machine...

 

[SimonDoom]

Like a snob, I would have to read their work before it would work on me.

A good point, and it raises the question: can two people with completely different tastes in erotica get along?

 

[crookedletter]

A good point, and it raises the question: can two people with completely different tastes in erotica get along?

Plot bunny: star-crossed lovers, a Loving Wives man and a Romance woman.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

A good point, and it raises the question: can two people with completely different tastes in erotica get along?

I would suggest that their tastes being different is not the issue as long as they are complimentary.

 

[Kat90xx]

Plot bunny: star-crossed lovers, a Loving Wives man and a Romance woman.

Montagues and Capulets move aside!