Be as boring as possible.

[tekgirl]

this is supposed to be boring....no exciting literary devices

Sorry. I got carried away. It's the nerd in me.

 

[DVS]

Aphid larvae do bore into the leaves and stems of plants.

No, that should be...
"Aphid larvae do bore into the leaves and stems of plants" said Tom boringly.

 

[Chiara_searches]

Oh, good heavens. Y'all take me back to my youth (yes, when the dinosaurs reigned over the earth) when we indulged in a form of (alleged) humor called "Tom Swifties."

Tom Swifties originated thusly, according to Wikipedia:

The series' writing style, which was sometimes adverb-heavy, suggested a name for a type of adverbial pun promulgated in the 1960s, the "Tom Swifties". Some examples are: "'I lost my crutches,' said Tom lamely"; and "'I'll take the prisoner downstairs', said Tom condescendingly."
​

Tom Swifties were a frequent roadtrip entertainment for my family, and our contributions to the genre included such memorable examples as (remember, this was some 40 to 50 years ago)...

"Stop at the next gas station, please," said Tom pithily.
"I can't find my wife!" exclaimed Tom Ruthlessly.
"The tornado stripped the shingles from the house," said Tom ruefully.
"I'd like Chinese food for dinner," said Tom wantonly.​

Ah, the good old days of innocent humor, even if it was rather punny.

This makes me miss my Games magazine subscription. *big sigh* *little pout*

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

No, that should be...
"Aphid larvae do bore into the leaves and stems of plants" said Tom boringly.

"Oh, let me try again, let me try again" said Tom repeatedly.

"Carpenter bees make nests by boring into wood, vibrating their bodies as they rasp their mandibles against the wood" said Tom beeutifully.

 

[tekgirl]

This thread is starting to bug me. Get it? Bug me. Beecause of all the insect references. See what I did there with the "bee"cause, like bumble bee...oh forget it.

 

[midwestyankee]

This thread is starting to bug me. Get it? Bug me. Beecause of all the insect references. See what I did there with the "bee"cause, like bumble bee...oh forget it.

In sex bother you?

 

[tekgirl]

In sex bother you?

I have to look that one up in my Funk and Wagnalls.

 

[midwestyankee]

I have to look that one up in my Funk and Wagnalls.

Be careful, you might find yourself getting excited by the Fickle Finger of Fate. And that wouldn't be boring.

 

[tekgirl]

Be careful, you might find yourself getting excited by the Fickle Finger of Fate. And that wouldn't be boring.

Very interesting.

 

[midwestyankee]

Very interesting.

You might call it an outlet but it's a socket to me.

 

[Chiara_searches]

You might call it an outlet but it's a socket to me.

"You might call it an outlet but it's a socket to me," said Tom shockingly.

To coin Keroin's phrase ~ there, I fixed it for you.

 

[tekgirl]

You might call it an outlet but it's a socket to me.

Is that a chicken joke?

 

[satindesire]

I think I'll have a baked potato tonight with dinner.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

I think I'll have a baked potato tonight with dinner.

POTATO!!!

 

[rbijon]

POTATO!!!

...with white bread........................

 

[midwestyankee]

Is that a chicken joke?

I can tell chicken jokes by the peck.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Chex mix. Peanut butter. Is good.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

I have toothpaste that stands on its big, flat cap. Yowza!

 

[Chiara_searches]

I can tell chicken jokes by the peck.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bushel?

(Great now I'm going to be thinking "A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck" all night long).

 

[midwestyankee]

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bushel?

(Great now I'm going to be thinking "A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck" all night long).

That song was written by a guy named Hickey, wasn't it?

 

[Chiara_searches]

That song was written by a guy named Hickey, wasn't it?

Let me be Frank, Loesser was the composer. I don't Blaine you for getting it wrong. But Como here and push this Hutton; you'll see Day light up for the song.

(Okay, ran out of puns for composer and some recording artist of the song. See our favorite source.)

 

[Sir_Winston54]

A lot of posts from this thread should be in the "pun, pun, pun" thread.

They're too interesting for this thread.

I wonder if Etoile could move them.

I wonder if she'd go to the effort to do so.

I doubt it.

 

[daus42]

my toaster hates me

 

[tekgirl]

my toaster hates me

But I like you.

 

[daus42]

But I like you.

awww- ain't you sweet.

they have smart toasters now.....it'a all part of skynets plan